RE: When does RACK cross the line? (Full Version)

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fairerthanshe -> RE: When does RACK cross the line? (7/21/2007 1:36:02 PM)

Greetings Naja,

I see where you are coming from now.  That is an excellent idea and one that would fall under the heading of education within the community.  Discussions such as this are what fosters positive changes within how we each deal with the unexpected. 

well wishes ~ fairer




Najakcharmer -> RE: When does RACK cross the line? (7/21/2007 2:29:41 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: fairerthanshe
I see where you are coming from now.  That is an excellent idea and one that would fall under the heading of education within the community.  Discussions such as this are what fosters positive changes within how we each deal with the unexpected. 


Exactly, thank you.  I'm not advocating "oh, let's just tell these people they can't take any risks because it can cause problems for everyone".  I'm suggesting that it is worth the community's while to take the time to think seriously about situations like this, and to help educate folks on how to be able to better manage their risks when they choose to take them. 

Anyone else have good tips to share for damage control and risk management? 




ready4srvce4all -> RE: When does RACK cross the line? (7/21/2007 2:49:47 PM)

I think buying polyester leisure suits off the RACK crosses the line.





pinioned14Me -> RE: When does RACK cross the line? (7/21/2007 3:20:48 PM)

As much as I might disagree with those performing or soliciting play of that nature, it is their choice.

Accidental death due to asphyxia is more common than the examples offered but all involved awareness and consent of those participating. I could not knowingly participate in any of the mentioned scenes, legal concerns for myself being foremost in the long list of reasons as to why not.

The trickier question...do I stop a scene when I think it's gone too far?  That answer waits for the moment I find myself in the position that requires a decision.




KnightofMists -> RE: When does RACK cross the line? (7/21/2007 4:49:42 PM)

I can't figure out whose line your talking about.... your line, my line... the communitities line.. whose line?

If engage in play with RACK as a guide,.... well

Risk... it's my perception of Risk and my partners.. not yours or anyone else's

Aware... well... again... I and my partners are aware to the level we are comfortable with..... not to some kink police

Consent.. mmmmmmm do I need anyone's consent to play with my partners except from my partners?

Kink... mmmmm well we not making quilts you know... Some people not gonna like what another does..




aSlavesLife -> RE: When does RACK cross the line? (7/21/2007 5:14:11 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

I can't figure out whose line your talking about.... your line, my line... the communitities line.. whose line?

If engage in play with RACK as a guide,.... well

Risk... it's my perception of Risk and my partners.. not yours or anyone else's

Aware... well... again... I and my partners are aware to the level we are comfortable with..... not to some kink police

Consent.. mmmmmmm do I need anyone's consent to play with my partners except from my partners?

Kink... mmmmm well we not making quilts you know... Some people not gonna like what another does..


Amen and well said. The call for overall safety guidelines within the " greater BDSM community " is why I tend to label some as safety nazis, and one of the many reasons that I avoid communities in general in the same manner that I would avoid a street walker dripping with STD's. I prefer my kink like I prefer my scotch, straight and not watered down.

Owner of slave L




marieToo -> RE: When does RACK cross the line? (7/21/2007 5:18:14 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: ready4srvce4all

I think buying polyester leisure suits off the RACK crosses the line.




Now THAT shit should be illegal. 

I think the government should step in.




KnightofMists -> RE: When does RACK cross the line? (7/21/2007 5:20:53 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: marieToo

quote:

ORIGINAL: ready4srvce4all

I think buying polyester leisure suits off the RACK crosses the line.




Now THAT shit should be illegal. 

I think the government should step in.


locks my closet doors...  umm just encase someone snoops




marieToo -> RE: When does RACK cross the line? (7/21/2007 5:28:25 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

quote:

ORIGINAL: marieToo

quote:

ORIGINAL: ready4srvce4all

I think buying polyester leisure suits off the RACK crosses the line.




Now THAT shit should be illegal. 

I think the government should step in.


locks my closet doors...  umm just encase someone snoops


Ha!  I always knew you were FAR kinkier than you were letting on. 




Aswad -> RE: When does RACK cross the line? (7/21/2007 6:48:29 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Grlwithboy

Is that the end of responsibility though? "It turns me on, I like it?"


No, the end of responsibility is making sure the other party knows what they're in for, consents to it, and is competent in both regards. That is what we call informed consent. If it is good enough for experimental, life threatening medical treatments and Do Not Resuscitate orders, I don't get where it's not okay for other reasons.

quote:


Do you really think that people think death is such a groovy intense trip after the first few sucking stab wounds?


I wouldn't know. I don't know anyone who gets turned on by death itself.
I do, however, know people who get turned on by things that inevitably lead to it.
For all I care, they can engage in it, as long as all parties give prior informed consent.
'Course, it might not be such a bad idea to have something handy for acute palliative care.
It takes a lot to get hot enough not to lose it when you're dying, I'd imagine.
No doctor is going to prescribe anything to that effect, though.
And talking to one, you'd probably be locked up.
No wonder few ever do, sane or not.

quote:


Are we absolved from at least asking "and...why the fuck would you want that?"


Neither absolved nor required; only you get to decide what you want to ask.
I draw the line at interfering, unless I consider the consent to be suspect.
(The latter, obviously, would only apply in person.)




Aswad -> RE: When does RACK cross the line? (7/21/2007 6:53:51 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Alumbrado

Absent a crystal ball, I doubt if anyone can 'knowingly' consent to something in the future that they haven't experienced... particularly something that extreme.


You are dodging the question. Consent is not about fully knowing what it will be like, or there would never be consent to anything in the world. First experiences are first experiences. It is about knowing what will happen and understanding the information available, as well as reasoning about consequences.

Did Meiwes' partner know what it'd be like to have his d*ck cut off? No, obviously not. You only get one. Heck, Meiwes didn't even know that eating it raw wouldn't work. But they both knew what they were getting into, and understood it would entail dying and so forth. Risk awareness doesn't get much clearer than that; you know what will happen, period. Provided they were mentally competent, which I'm not so sure about in that case, there was informed consent.




Aswad -> RE: When does RACK cross the line? (7/21/2007 7:01:16 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Najakcharmer

That fallout does immediately affect me and mine, so it is in fact my business what they are doing when it leads to those kinds of consequences.


I quite get this point, I do.
But is restricting their liberty the price of yours?
And is that an acceptable price to pay?
Who then decides the extent of restriction of liberty?
The authorities already draw a line, and most of us are over it.
The majority already draws a line, and all of us are over it.

If people had kept regular slaves (the negro slave trade, I'm talking about) up to this day, any stuff related to them trying to break free would be on the evening news, and people would be in a bad odor about it, with none so much upset as the other slaves, whose lives would be harsher for it.

Same thing for any group that ever had to fight for their rights.
Heck, 2/3 of America didn't want to be "free" of the British.
Someone decided to say "screw that, my choice", though.
In the end, that caused fallout, but many think it better.

The problem is not the action, but the reaction.
Dealing with the root cause is always harder, but ultimately more worthwhile.

At least, that's my 2 cents.




Aswad -> RE: When does RACK cross the line? (7/21/2007 7:05:23 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: nephandi

In ideology i agree, but i also feel that it is not the induvidual household or pair's right to paint the whole comunity black in the eyes of the masses.


Nor is it the right of the community to restrict the individual, as vanillas try to restrict us.
It is not the individual who paints the community black, but the media response.
And pandering to generalization and judgment is a downward spiral.




Aswad -> RE: When does RACK cross the line? (7/21/2007 7:21:32 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetNsmartBBW

Just because someone 'agrees' to something does not necessarily mean that the person consenting is of sound mind. If not, can they truly consent?


A more useful question would be "is their consent valid or meaningful?" Which comes back to whether the right to self-determination exists, and whether it is universal. It also comes down to determining the difference between a person's essential self and any conditions they may be affected by. A depression is superimposed over the essential self, and if it caused a person to seek out self-destruction, that would not be their "true" will. Some forms of schizophrenia, most forms of PDD, and so forth, are fundamental aspects of the essential self, however, and could be considered to express a person's "true" will. In short, is the person consenting, or is something else consenting?

Very hard to determine, so I've drawn my line for extreme play at having a professional evaluation for the ability to think rationally about what is involved, along with having said professional evaluate their level of comprehension of what may happen, and what consequences may stem from this, as well as whether they have conditions that may bias their judgment. Many drugs, sleep deprivation, and so forth, are of course also things that void consent in my book.

quote:


While I hate to sound like a spoilsport, I strongly suspect that if I were acquainted with a cannibal Dom, and knew He'd found a 'willing' partner (or should that be victim?)- I'd intervene.


Question being, would you intervene in the sense of verifying that the partner was "willing", or in the sense of disregarding whether the partner was "willing"? The former is quite understandable. The latter embodies a principle that, if applied universally, does not allow you to practice your own kinks. I think not applying things universally is the very essence of hipocrisy and double standards, so I would not do the latter, unless other reasons compelled me to (like the prospect of being implicated judicially).

quote:


After all...not like the submissive is going to have much chance to change their mind, is there?


In most such cases, it's not a submissive that's involved, but a fellow fetishist.

Apart from that ... no, once an intervention has been done, neither party gets to change their minds about anything. Their minds will be changed with drugs during in-patient "care", regardless of their sanity, because some "illnesses" depend on the status of the surrounding society, not the status of the patient. For instance, you cannot be diagnosed as delusional if the belief you hold is common to your culture or surroundings, but if it is not, you can be. In that respect, the USSR was following "best practices" when it chose to imprison people for holding the "delusional" belief that communism had flaws.

I'm not sure either party would consent to you sending them down that road.

quote:


It's a difficult thing, though- when does protecting the innocent, or the mentally incompetent become an infringement on individual rights? And I'm not even talking legalities here...just every day stuff...


This one is complicated. Suffice to say that there are few people in this world who are mentally competent to manage their own affairs completely.




Aswad -> RE: When does RACK cross the line? (7/21/2007 7:25:53 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lewcifer

RACK crosses the line when it leads to death, permanent injury or dismemberment.


How so? The risks of consciously seeking one of these results would be pretty well known, and easy to be aware of. There are also established standards of consent that are applied to seeking these results in other contexts than kink. Why should those standards nor be applied equally to kink?

quote:


One should generally try and avoid those things whenever possible.


One should generally try to embody the principle of "conformity, obedience, respect".
Or so I was told by a kindergarden teacher one day, much to my dismay.
One might want to be wary of statements that start "one should".
Otherwise, one is straying into determining the value of life.
Other people's life, that is.




Aswad -> RE: When does RACK cross the line? (7/21/2007 7:27:21 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lewcifer

quote:

ORIGINAL: gooddogbenji
But a brand is a permanent injury to some degree.


To what degree, and using which standard of measure?


Breaks down real simple:

It is a third degree burn, with all that entails.
It causes irreparable tissue damage.
It leaves a permanent mark.

Where is the ambiguity?




Aswad -> RE: When does RACK cross the line? (7/21/2007 7:29:53 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Celeste43

Well, personally I think anyone who agreed to castration, being killed and eaten, being given peritonitis by piercing the bowel wall etc is mentally ill.


Knowing the field of mental health reasonably well, and knowing people who have this wiring, I would say that there are mentally healthy people with these desires, who might act on them. Which is not to say that there aren't a lot of mentally unhealthy people who are more likely to do so, just that it isn't an absolute given. I agree that consent is required, but not that it is impossible to give informed consent to such a thing.




Aswad -> RE: When does RACK cross the line? (7/21/2007 7:36:46 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkDreams123

at some point there has to be some consideration for the good of society as a whole.


Emphatically disagree.

There should be consideration of individuals, but not society as a whole.

quote:


You know, with all we have to complain about, we really have it pretty good. We really have figured out this living together stuff pretty well.


What? Were are you living? Several people got killed for no good reason during the time it took me to respond to this post. More got raped. Tons are starving. Tons are ostracized, stigmatized, and condemned.

quote:


Democracy and majority rule works rather OK, by and large.


No, actually, it does not. It is highly flawed, and should have been tossed ages ago, but WW2 prevented that. Price to pay for establishing ethical guidelines for medical research and mostly getting rid of antisemitism, I guess. But still a price, not a boon. The only merit that democracy has, is that all current incarnations are designed to minimize the change that can be caused by any one instance of a particular government along the way, whether good or bad, providing a much-needed averaging function, relative to actual majority rule.




Aswad -> RE: When does RACK cross the line? (7/21/2007 7:41:23 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHeart

Let's say we argued this thread for a few more pages and finally reached a consensus (yeah, right!) would the standards we agreed upon still hold good in 50 years time? Would those standards have been acceptable 50 years ago? Or in a Muslim country? Or amongst the tribesmen from Papua New Guinea? Answer: No.


[sm=applause.gif]

No single act has been considered immoral in all societies at all times.
Morals are a matter of fashion, as always. Click the link for a nice essay.




Aswad -> RE: When does RACK cross the line? (7/21/2007 7:43:39 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: sadomasokisti

I do believe that ppl should obey the law while practicing sex and BDSM.


This argument is moot. Laws vary. Some places allow you to engage in BDSM. Some do not. Some end up somewhere in the middle. Under the Taliban, women might get an acid bath for not following laws that we would consider entirely unreasonable. Standards will and do vary.

Leaving it up to law is just deferring personal responsibility.

That has no place in responsible play, IMO.




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