Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

Masters, do you have a submissive personality "type" you prefer?


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> Masters, do you have a submissive personality "type" you prefer? Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
Masters, do you have a submissive personality "typ... - 7/20/2007 6:42:22 AM   
MzMia


Posts: 5333
Joined: 7/30/2004
Status: offline 		Masters, do you seek partners that have laid back, go with the flow, easy to get to know you personalities,
or does it even matter what type of personality a potential submissive has?
Is being submissive normally a quality you are "born" with or is it based on the person and the
relationship that you are in?
 
Personally, I prefer a mate that might have to be Dominant in every day life due to his career and relationships,
BUT tends to have a laid back personality and is easy to get along with from the START of our relationship.
 
I have not been able to get past point A with many submissives that are overbearing, demanding or way too aggressive from Day 1, that hold the carrot out that down the road they will "change" into their submissive role or personality.
I certainly do not want a bedroom submissive that is only submissive in the bedroom.
 
I realized that I have a strong personality type MANY years ago, and I knew that I needed someone more laid back before I
even discovered this lifestyle several years ago. I have to get to know someone WELL, and having the right type
of personality is what I look for FIRST, because for ME, the rest will come.
I have been around the "block" enough times that there are certain types of personalities that are not conducive for ME,
to enter into ANY sort of long term relationship with.  If you approach me as a "submissive" but are confrontational, overbearing, demanding, argumentative, aggressive, etc. you are not going to make it with ME.
 
I see so many men that are totally vanilla and very submissive with their wives.  I have a family member that has been obeying his wife for 45 years and again he is vanilla! So again I know that these "personality types" exist because I see them all the damn time in the vanilla world.  Should I expect less from a "submissive mate" that I can find in an easy going vanilla person?


So do you seek a submissive that already has core innate natural submissive tendancies OR does it really not matter
as long as the person is submissive with you?
 
Again, for clarification I do not expect or want instant "submission" from a total stranger, what I want and expect is
a personality "type" that claims to be on the submissive side of a D/s equation, to at least have characteristics that
I consider to be characteristic of what they are claiming to be!

< Message edited by MzMia -- 7/20/2007 7:18:59 AM >

_____________________________

Namaste'
To Each His/Her Own
"DENIAL ain't just a river in Egypt." Mark Twain


What's your favorite fetish?
"My partner's whisper"--bloomswell
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Masters, do you have a submissive personality "... - 7/20/2007 7:22:18 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		If you're talking about a relationship which will include any socialization within it, I think personality should be oneo f the things to consider when discussing long term compatibility.

Orientation is innate, expression of orientation is learned.

As well, personality does not equal orientation.  An aggressive personality does not equal dominant personality OR dominant orientation.

I need someone with a strong personality, no matter what orientation they are.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to MzMia)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Masters, do you have a submissive personality "... - 7/20/2007 7:26:12 AM   
MzMia


Posts: 5333
Joined: 7/30/2004
Status: offline 		Thank you LA

So often, especially around here I don't see enough of the differentiation between innate "personality types" and
D/s roles.
 
You got it!!!

_____________________________

Namaste'
To Each His/Her Own
"DENIAL ain't just a river in Egypt." Mark Twain


What's your favorite fetish?
"My partner's whisper"--bloomswell

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Masters, do you have a submissive personality "... - 7/20/2007 8:41:08 AM   
Thomas13


Posts: 4
Joined: 9/6/2006
Status: offline 		I believe people can  and need to be both dominant and submissive depending on who they are dealing with. While I am in control and assertive at work , I much prefer the submissive role with my dominant partner.

(in reply to MzMia)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Masters, do you have a submissive personality "... - 7/20/2007 9:21:15 AM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline 		Women who are intelligent and well read and who are kind and considerate to others get me hot.  I want a woman who strikes a balance between testing me and learning to submit in the ways I need and desire.  Too easy and I get bored, too hard and I doubt their submission. It becomes too much work, and at some point, it begins to feel more like I am being domineering rather than being what I consider a healthy dominant.

I need someone self aware and who has real life experience.  They must love adventure but despise drama.  They must enjoy the finer things in life but find pleasure in the simple things as well.

So rare and so very very special.

(in reply to Thomas13)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Masters, do you have a submissive personality "... - 7/20/2007 10:57:26 AM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MzMia

Masters, do you seek partners that have laid back, go with the flow, easy to get to know you personalities,
or does it even matter what type of personality a potential submissive has?

It seems that you're implying that there are only two personality types. "Laid back, go with the flow, easy to get to know you" and NOT that. There are many. The main personality characteristic I tend to be attracted to is dominant. People with dominant personalities, in my observsations, are better at being macromanaged because you can give them a task and they make it happen.

quote:

Is being submissive normally a quality you are "born" with or is it based on the person and the
relationship that you are in?

Hmmm...good question. While I feel that you can be "born" as one or the other, I also feel you can be "born" with both...and it varies from person to person as to which is being brought out.

Master Fire


_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to MzMia)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Masters, do you have a submissive personality "... - 7/20/2007 12:12:19 PM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline 		I wonder how many who say "I never submit" are religious and submit to their god?  So there is something out there that will evoke submissive feelings in them.  Could it be true that submission, like dominance is simply a continum largely dependent on the interaction of the people involved instead of some uber genetic "trait" that one can grasp onto and hope for purity of essense, or POE for short?

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Masters, do you have a submissive personality "... - 7/20/2007 2:03:34 PM   
MzMia


Posts: 5333
Joined: 7/30/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Thomas13

I believe people can  and need to be both dominant and submissive depending on who they are dealing with. While I am in control and assertive at work , I much prefer the submissive role with my dominant partner.


:::smiling:: you sound like my type of gentleman.
Congratulations on your first post thomas.

_____________________________

Namaste'
To Each His/Her Own
"DENIAL ain't just a river in Egypt." Mark Twain


What's your favorite fetish?
"My partner's whisper"--bloomswell

(in reply to Thomas13)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Masters, do you have a submissive personality "... - 7/20/2007 2:07:03 PM   
MzMia


Posts: 5333
Joined: 7/30/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterFireMaam

quote:

ORIGINAL: MzMia

Masters, do you seek partners that have laid back, go with the flow, easy to get to know you personalities,
or does it even matter what type of personality a potential submissive has?

It seems that you're implying that there are only two personality types. "Laid back, go with the flow, easy to get to know you" and NOT that. There are many. The main personality characteristic I tend to be attracted to is dominant. People with dominant personalities, in my observsations, are better at being macromanaged because you can give them a task and they make it happen.
 
Oh I totally agree MasterFireMaam, but some of us tend to have STRONG Dominant personalities innately, MOST of the time.


quote:

Is being submissive normally a quality you are "born" with or is it based on the person and the
relationship that you are in?

Hmmm...good question. While I feel that you can be "born" as one or the other, I also feel you can be "born" with both...and it varies from person to person as to which is being brought out.

I think we are all born with both, but I am talking about those that favor one way or the other STRONGLY, especially in relationships.
Even the most submissive person, is going to show signs of Dominance sometimes.
I do think that many tend to be one way or the other most of the time, very few people can live their lives straight dab in the middle.
Great post Master Fire Maam!
Master Fire



**SimplyMichael I also agree, but many people are strongly one way or the other.
To insist that this is not possible would be just as narrow minded as to say that everyone
is a switch.***
Some people are innately very Dominant  and some people are innately very submissively wired, and
some people fluctuate more than others do.
Great post!**

< Message edited by MzMia -- 7/20/2007 2:12:05 PM >

_____________________________

Namaste'
To Each His/Her Own
"DENIAL ain't just a river in Egypt." Mark Twain


What's your favorite fetish?
"My partner's whisper"--bloomswell

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Masters, do you have a submissive personality "... - 7/20/2007 2:12:55 PM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

I wonder how many who say "I never submit" are religious and submit to their god?


Point taken. I wear a collar for this purpose, even. I was assuming we were talking about person to person relationships.

Master Fire


_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to SimplyMichael)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Masters, do you have a submissive personality "... - 7/20/2007 2:31:13 PM   
PAcpllooking


Posts: 73
Joined: 5/14/2004
Status: offline 		I look for a balanced personality.
We all have a core that no matter what will never change. Unless the core matches what I want then its a waste of time for everyone. How many have we all seen go through the trouble of trying to change someones core and it never works.
The ones that are my match are the ones who have a balance between stength, kindness, humility, pride and responsibily.

William

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Masters, do you have a submissive personality "... - 7/20/2007 2:34:41 PM   
MzMia


Posts: 5333
Joined: 7/30/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PAcpllooking

I look for a balanced personality.
We all have a core that no matter what will never change. Unless the core matches what I want then its a waste of time for everyone. How many have we all seen go through the trouble of trying to change someones core and it never works.
The ones that are my match are the ones who have a balance between stength, kindness, humility, pride and responsibily.

William


Wonderful post william!
I love that term the "core personality", that is exactly the point I was trying to make,
I think you made it better than I did.
Thank you!
Some of us are hard wired and have that "core" personality from the womb to the tomb.
I do.

_____________________________

Namaste'
To Each His/Her Own
"DENIAL ain't just a river in Egypt." Mark Twain


What's your favorite fetish?
"My partner's whisper"--bloomswell

(in reply to PAcpllooking)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Masters, do you have a submissive personality "... - 7/20/2007 2:57:08 PM   
NefertariReborn


Posts: 381
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

Women who are intelligent and well read and who are kind and considerate to others get me hot.  I want a woman who strikes a balance between testing me and learning to submit in the ways I need and desire.  Too easy and I get bored, too hard and I doubt their submission. It becomes too much work, and at some point, it begins to feel more like I am being domineering rather than being what I consider a healthy dominant.

I need someone self aware and who has real life experience.  They must love adventure but despise drama.  They must enjoy the finer things in life but find pleasure in the simple things as well.

So rare and so very very special.


What Michael said, except it's a he not a she.  And, if all that personality comes attached to a sexy ass well life is perfect.  (Yes I can be shallow. I wear My sign all the time.)

(in reply to SimplyMichael)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Masters, do you have a submissive personality "... - 7/20/2007 5:08:16 PM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline 		Lucky for me it DOES come attached to a fine ass, a hot mouth, and a wicked woman...

(in reply to NefertariReborn)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Masters, do you have a submissive personality "... - 7/20/2007 5:14:52 PM   
MissDiscipline


Posts: 117
Joined: 10/1/2006
From: Domme Beach Calif
Status: offline 		I do enjoy submissive that are eager to serve Me-  Are knowledgable but dont talk about it all the time. I cant stand those hyperverbal, agrressive over bearing , too busy complaining about their life to serve  a Domme psuedo-subs-

(in reply to SimplyMichael)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Masters, do you have a submissive personality "... - 7/20/2007 5:38:54 PM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline 		Daddy was seeking someone who's a natural submissive yet opinionate, strong, successful, independent - almost a carbon copy of Himself which made my gift of submission quite special for Him.  He wasn't looking for (and believe me, He can tell if you are) women who are are weak and clingy ...plus He prefers a woman who has other interests and hobbies like music, arts, besides being in this lifestyle which is why we clicked so well after meeting.

_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...


...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to MzMia)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Masters, do you have a submissive personality "... - 7/21/2007 10:44:54 AM   
MzMia


Posts: 5333
Joined: 7/30/2004
Status: offline 		Thank you all for your posts.
We all normally have a personality {core} type that we can flow with, it is great
to know that in advance.
Many people are situationally Dominant or submissive, and there is a difference between
being in a role or situation, and that was IS the core of your being.
Thank you.

_____________________________

Namaste'
To Each His/Her Own
"DENIAL ain't just a river in Egypt." Mark Twain


What's your favorite fetish?
"My partner's whisper"--bloomswell

(in reply to sambamanslilgirl)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Masters, do you have a submissive personality "... - 7/22/2007 10:48:18 AM   
RaynaSub


Posts: 185
Joined: 9/3/2006
Status: offline 		My Master says that I am his type of submissive.
I tend to be low keyed, I am obedient and I love being in service to My Master.
My Master had a submissive before me that was a brat, My Master said he told
himself he would not make that mistake again.

(in reply to MzMia)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Masters, do you have a submissive personality "... - 7/28/2007 12:25:27 PM   
MzMia


Posts: 5333
Joined: 7/30/2004
Status: offline 		He was lucky that he found his TYPE.
I still have not found my TYPE, but I know he is out there.
It is nice to know, who can float your boat.

_____________________________

Namaste'
To Each His/Her Own
"DENIAL ain't just a river in Egypt." Mark Twain


What's your favorite fetish?
"My partner's whisper"--bloomswell

(in reply to RaynaSub)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Masters, do you have a submissive personality "... - 7/28/2007 2:41:45 PM   
DarkDaddyZ


Posts: 805
Joined: 4/7/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MzMia

Masters, do you seek partners that have laid back, go with the flow, easy to get to know you personalities,
or does it even matter what type of personality a potential submissive has?
Is being submissive normally a quality you are "born" with or is it based on the person and the
relationship that you are in?


I know that I am attracted to stronger women that crave submission.  Self sufficent and self made.  It's important to me that a submissive/slave can take care of herself but craves to serve.

_____________________________

"Flirting is part of the job description." DJ Jesus (Lucy Daughter Of The Devil)

Vanilla Official Music Page http://www.myspace.com/djzulu

(in reply to MzMia)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1] 2   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> Masters, do you have a submissive personality "type" you prefer? Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.094