A Show of Respect

A Show of Respect (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive

Message

salilus -> A Show of Respect (7/24/2007 7:19:27 PM)
I went searching on the topic of respect in these forums and, for the most part, what I found was a lot of talk about how respect is earned and how we only give respect to such and such person with this, that, and the other qualities and so on and so forth. However, lets pretend you are actually with someone you respect (skip the pretending, if you actually are with someone you respect, obviously); lets get past who deserves respect and when and why they should have it and get to the nitty gritty: How do you show your respect to your top/owner/dominant/master/mistress/insert-honorific-here? What things do you do or say that make it utterly clear that you respect them? I'm not talking about love, either - you don't have to love someone in order to respect them. I've cared about and loved a number of people in my life who I just can't find it in myself to respect. I honestly want to know what symbols, rituals, words, etc you use that show your respect. Why am I asking? Because I am curious and because I've found that I have a rather skewed mentality on how I give respect to a person. Meaning, I honestly think I'm showing a person respect by doing X but they're used to someone doing Y to show them respect. I've never had the opportunity and inclination (at the same time) to ask the question, either. PS: If your answer happens to be, "I get naked and bare my whole self," or something to that effect, it's not what I'm looking for. I get naked for my doctor. I don't do it because I respect her. If I were to call her 'ma'am' or something to that effect, that is because I respect her. Thanks in advance!

LadyHeart -> RE: A Show of Respect (7/24/2007 7:44:52 PM)
One of the things that shows respect is to be the best person you can be in order to show them they are valued. This includes acting with good manners at all times, and listening intently to everything they say, and putting it into action. One of the most disrespectful things we can do to another person is to listen with less than full attention. If we admire someone, we hang on their every word, and we try to be worthy of their respect in return. We dress the way they like, prepare the food they like, and eliminate any habit they find annoying. What it comes down to is finding out as much about them as you can, by active listening, and shaping your own behaviour accordingly. It is true in the outside world as well as the D/s world. If we respect someone, we want to be more like them :)) LH

AquaticSub -> RE: A Show of Respect (7/24/2007 7:59:08 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: salilus How do you show your respect to your top/owner/dominant/master/mistress/insert-honorific-here? What things do you do or say that make it utterly clear that you respect them? I give them my full attention, I make sure my tone and words are respectful... rather standard stuff I suppose. I very rarely call someone "Sir" other then Valyraen, except for playful banter.

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: A Show of Respect (7/24/2007 8:04:02 PM)
I'll actually ask them questions and listen to the answers.

slaveluci -> RE: A Show of Respect (7/24/2007 8:05:58 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyHeart One of the things that shows respect is to be the best person you can be in order to show them they are valued. This includes acting with good manners at all times, and listening intently to everything they say, and putting it into action. One of the most disrespectful things we can do to another person is to listen with less than full attention. If we admire someone, we hang on their every word, and we try to be worthy of their respect in return. We dress the way they like, prepare the food they like, and eliminate any habit they find annoying. What it comes down to is finding out as much about them as you can, by active listening, and shaping your own behaviour accordingly. It is true in the outside world as well as the D/s world Wow....what a great, thoughtful answer. I "ditto" that. I place Master's pillows exactly like He likes them. I curl up with Him just as He likes even though it's not the most comfortable sleeping position for me and we listen to the music He chooses and not my favorite Seventies station as we drift off to sleep. I get up at 4 am to get Him off to work when He has an early shift even though I'm dead tired myself and I start His shower, make His coffee, and pack His lunch all with a smile on my face and pleasant tone of voice. I'm available when He calls at lunch and I do all the household chores like meals, laundry, etc. to the best of my ability. I pay attention, make mental notes, and remember to do things just as He likes them without having to be told more than once. I put on and take off His socks and shoes and lovingly massage His tired feet when He gets home. I start His shower and dry Him off. I read aloud to Him. I serve as His efficient, organized secretary and remind Him (without nagging) of important things He needs to remember. I listen to Him complain about the idiots at work and I listen to Him go on happily about all He got accomplished at work. When He'd rather not drive, I do. I trust Him enough to be open with Him about all things, not just what I think He wants to hear. I do all these and a million other little things to show Him just how much He means to me. I truly do admire, respect, and look up to Him and I tell Him so all the time. I could not be owned by and/or obey One whom I did not genuinely feel respect for. I put His happiness above mine at all times and you know what? That makes my own happiness all the greater. His happiness truly brings about mine. I love Him more than anyone else in the world but, in addition, I respect Him and that makes our relationship so much deeper. Sorry for rambling on but you asked, salilus[8D]..........luci

SexyRed -> RE: A Show of Respect (7/24/2007 8:07:55 PM)
I offer respect to someone, until they prove they do not deserve it. Listening skills are very important as well as consideration, empathy, honesty and compassion. If I sense the respect is one sided in any way, I am out of there. And that is what I vow to do quicker moving forward.

domiguy -> RE: A Show of Respect (7/24/2007 8:18:44 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross I'll actually ask them questions and listen to the answers. There are times when I would like to give you a big wet kiss.....What a brilliant but simple fucking answer. We live in a world full of shit heads....To actually listen to what someone is saying is one of the best ways that I could ever show that I respect that individual.....Everything else rather pales in comparison.

NefertariReborn -> RE: A Show of Respect (7/24/2007 9:29:01 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: slaveluci quote: ORIGINAL: LadyHeart One of the things that shows respect is to be the best person you can be in order to show them they are valued. This includes acting with good manners at all times, and listening intently to everything they say, and putting it into action. One of the most disrespectful things we can do to another person is to listen with less than full attention. If we admire someone, we hang on their every word, and we try to be worthy of their respect in return. We dress the way they like, prepare the food they like, and eliminate any habit they find annoying. What it comes down to is finding out as much about them as you can, by active listening, and shaping your own behaviour accordingly. It is true in the outside world as well as the D/s world Wow....what a great, thoughtful answer. I "ditto" that. I place Master's pillows exactly like He likes them. I curl up with Him just as He likes even though it's not the most comfortable sleeping position for me and we listen to the music He chooses and not my favorite Seventies station as we drift off to sleep. I get up at 4 am to get Him off to work when He has an early shift even though I'm dead tired myself and I start His shower, make His coffee, and pack His lunch all with a smile on my face and pleasant tone of voice. I'm available when He calls at lunch and I do all the household chores like meals, laundry, etc. to the best of my ability. I pay attention, make mental notes, and remember to do things just as He likes them without having to be told more than once. I put on and take off His socks and shoes and lovingly massage His tired feet when He gets home. I start His shower and dry Him off. I read aloud to Him. I serve as His efficient, organized secretary and remind Him (without nagging) of important things He needs to remember. I listen to Him complain about the idiots at work and I listen to Him go on happily about all He got accomplished at work. When He'd rather not drive, I do. I trust Him enough to be open with Him about all things, not just what I think He wants to hear. I do all these and a million other little things to show Him just how much He means to me. I truly do admire, respect, and look up to Him and I tell Him so all the time. I could not be owned by and/or obey One whom I did not genuinely feel respect for. I put His happiness above mine at all times and you know what? That makes my own happiness all the greater. His happiness truly brings about mine. I love Him more than anyone else in the world but, in addition, I respect Him and that makes our relationship so much deeper. Sorry for rambling on but you asked, salilus[8D]..........luci wipes a tear Gosh, that was beautiful.

slaveluci -> RE: A Show of Respect (7/24/2007 9:32:12 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: NefertariReborn wipes a tear Gosh, that was beautiful. It certainly is. God, my life is perfect!!!!![8D]............luci

classykindasassy -> RE: A Show of Respect (7/24/2007 9:49:18 PM)
It totally depends on how they are. I know of an acknowleged master who has no desire to be kowtowed to by anyone other than his collared slave, and anyone he might play with. Then you have the type of person who might prefer the whole free world address him/her with some form of deference or honorific. Most that I know do not require such protocol from people who are not their collared property. Our city is big on low protocol. Other places may be different.

sambamanslilgirl -> RE: A Show of Respect (7/25/2007 5:41:33 AM)
i show respect by simply calling Daddy - Daddy because that's the name He prefers

beargonewild -> RE: A Show of Respect (7/25/2007 6:25:51 AM)
For myself I find there are several ways in which I show my respect to my Sir/Dom, both verbally and non verbally. I give my full attention when he is speaking to me. I will answer questions in a straight forward manner using an even tone of voice. Refer to him as Sir or Master in the manner he prefers. When I am asked to do something, I will do so at that time without delay. When I see he's stressed, give him a back massage without being asked, same with offering a hug whitout being told to do so, etc. I've found it's the little things I do that shows the most respect towards my Dom.

Wildfleurs -> RE: A Show of Respect (7/25/2007 7:07:36 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: salilus I went searching on the topic of respect in these forums and, for the most part, what I found was a lot of talk about how respect is earned and how we only give respect to such and such person with this, that, and the other qualities and so on and so forth. However, lets pretend you are actually with someone you respect (skip the pretending, if you actually are with someone you respect, obviously); lets get past who deserves respect and when and why they should have it and get to the nitty gritty: How do you show your respect to your top/owner/dominant/master/mistress/insert-honorific-here? What things do you do or say that make it utterly clear that you respect them? I'm not talking about love, either - you don't have to love someone in order to respect them. I've cared about and loved a number of people in my life who I just can't find it in myself to respect. I honestly want to know what symbols, rituals, words, etc you use that show your respect. Why am I asking? Because I am curious and because I've found that I have a rather skewed mentality on how I give respect to a person. Meaning, I honestly think I'm showing a person respect by doing X but they're used to someone doing Y to show them respect. I've never had the opportunity and inclination (at the same time) to ask the question, either. PS: If your answer happens to be, "I get naked and bare my whole self," or something to that effect, it's not what I'm looking for. I get naked for my doctor. I don't do it because I respect her. If I were to call her 'ma'am' or something to that effect, that is because I respect her. Thanks in advance! I can't really point to specific actions, but I do know that I listen to and asorb what he says; I do what he wants (which I pretty much don't do with anyone else); I pay attention to his moods, preferences, and desires and try to adjust myself to him; and when he talks I pay attention to what he's saying. Basically what he says, does, and wants gets consideration above what anyone else in my life has. C~

imthatacheyouhav -> RE: A Show of Respect (7/25/2007 8:10:29 AM)
i hate to pick this a part...but here are some things i do ....i kneel...i call Him Master... i refill His drinks without being asked...various "chores" without being asked....seek out His desires by listening and gleenin what He likes and does not without having to play "twenty questions"....although i FULLy can and will ask questions.....i'm just saying i try to be observent to His wants and needs...to antisipate them before He needs to vocalize them...just little things like that...

littleone35 -> RE: A Show of Respect (7/25/2007 10:01:33 AM)
I am obedient to him, i call him Master, i learn what drinks he likes and make sure i always have them stocked. I make his coffee the way he likes and if he is sore i will give him a back massage. And when he talks he always gets my full attention. Matt's littleone

SimplyMichael -> RE: A Show of Respect (7/25/2007 10:05:21 AM)
I am Crappydom and I approve of this message...sarcasm can be such a beautiful and elegant thing.

SayaNereida -> RE: A Show of Respect (7/25/2007 1:34:24 PM)
I am in an intimate relationship with him; I could not be if I did not respect him. I actively listen when he speaks and give my undivided attention. I do all I am capable of doing to fulfill his wants and desires. When I speak, I do so openly, honestly and concisely as possible and am willing to explain if needed. I own my emotions and actions. I ask for clarification of things I do not understand in regards to his actions or words. I accept him as he is and do not try to change him. I do all I can to help him put his best self out for others; inform of situation, clean clothes, etc. I do not speak of him negatively to others. If I must correct something he said, I do so privately or at least quietly if others are around. I correct misunderstandings as quickly as possible. For me, how I treat and interact with him alone or in the presence of others shows my respect.

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: A Show of Respect (7/25/2007 1:50:32 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: domiguy There are times when I would like to give you a big wet kiss.....What a brilliant but simple fucking answer. We live in a world full of shit heads....To actually listen to what someone is saying is one of the best ways that I could ever show that I respect that individual.....Everything else rather pales in comparison. Sadly I'm not into fickle ghetto rap artists- but I sincerely appreciate the compliment and respect the source.

LaTigresse -> RE: A Show of Respect (7/25/2007 1:54:20 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: domiguy quote: ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross I'll actually ask them questions and listen to the answers. There are times when I would like to give you a big wet kiss.....What a brilliant but simple fucking answer. We live in a world full of shit heads....To actually listen to what someone is saying is one of the best ways that I could ever show that I respect that individual.....Everything else rather pales in comparison. I agree. Couldn't add a thing.

sleazybutterfly -> RE: A Show of Respect (7/25/2007 1:54:39 PM)
I show respect to my Master in a lot of different ways. I listen when he talks, I am interested in his day and what his life has been like. He has been many places and I always listen like it's the first time (even if it isn't) each time he tells me about them. I get up in the morning, pack his lunch, and make his breakfast. I always make sure he has socks clean and laying on this shoes for work. I ask him if he wants anything special for dinner, then I try to make sure I have everything on hand. I greet him in the evening with a big hug, ask how his day was, and serve him his dinner (even cutting his meat on occasion). We usually cuddle on the couch at night with him leaning against me, my arm around him. I stroke my hands thru his hair and rub his neck. When we go to bed, I always lay so he can fall asleep with his arm around me and I stay that way until he decides to move again. I love him so very much and that is no less than I respect him. He is a good person, a wonderful stand-up man, he is strong, very loving, and shows me nothing but love and respect in return. Even if I weren't in love with this man, I know that I would respect him. One word from him and I am on my knees, one touch of his hand and I am in awe, one kiss of his lips and my knees go weak. He is everything to me and I hope every single day he not only knows that my love for him grows stronger, but my respect right along with it.

Page: [1] 2 next > >>

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.03125