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RE: why is it so hard to find a Mistress that wonts a g... - 7/26/2007 6:09:43 AM   
michaelOfGeorgia


Posts: 4253
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Politesub53

quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelOfGeorgia

well, hopefully not "all"...safe some for the rest of us...LOL


michael, while you are on about spelling, i think you meant "save"

Sorry, i couldn`t resist it.


i stand corektted...LOL


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Profile   Post #: 21
RE: why is it so hard to find a Mistress that wonts a g... - 7/26/2007 6:11:42 AM   
michaelOfGeorgia


Posts: 4253
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: chains314

So what you or saying is no one cairs how good a sub one is just so thay can spell


well, spelling does help, believe me. not meaning any disrespect, but it shows that a person does at least have some grasp of the English launguage and is somehwat intelligent.


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Profile   Post #: 22
RE: why is it so hard to find a Mistress that wonts a g... - 7/26/2007 6:15:16 AM   
michaelOfGeorgia


Posts: 4253
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MsSonnetMarwood

When you are using a medium like online to first contact someone, then how well you communicate in this forum IS indeed important - so how well you spell and write IS important.   If you can't spell well and use poor sentence structure, you can not communicate effectively online, and it shows a general lack of attention to detail.   If you are someone who just has trouble spelling (some people do), then I suggest you type your communications in Word and run spellcheck before you transfer them to email/message boards.

Go back and re-read what you just wrote.  Crous dress?  Up frunt?   Profial?   These are all mistakes that would have been corrected with spellcheck.  It's sort of like trying to read what an 8 year old writes, and NOT something I'd expect from a grown man with a high school or college degree.   Quite honestly, I've stopped talking to subs who couldn't be bothered to write effectively - because their disinterest in communicating effectively indicated to me that there would probably be issues down the line with other lack of attention to not-so-small details.

I looked over your profile, and you say you have 25 years of experience in the lifestyle.   Drawing on all that experience - what do YOU think is not working for you now?   What has worked for you in the past?   What is different now?


kinda like saying "i is a Inglish Maijor in kollege"

(sorry, couldn't resist)

(ever notice that it's not easy to purposely misspell words...LOL)


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Profile   Post #: 23
RE: why is it so hard to find a Mistress that wonts a g... - 7/26/2007 6:15:59 AM   
MsSonnetMarwood


Posts: 1898
Joined: 2/10/2005
From: Eastern Shore, Maryland
Status: offline
quote:

somehwat



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Deja Moo: The feeling you've heard this bull somewhere before.

(in reply to michaelOfGeorgia)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: why is it so hard to find a Mistress that wonts a g... - 7/26/2007 10:07:30 AM   
skareamoos


Posts: 46
Joined: 5/13/2005
Status: offline 		Come on all.  Yes, he might have proof read his post a bit better, but lots of the problems may be from Typo Syndrome.  Inasmuch as I have hired more than 30 Personal Typing Coaches in my lifetime, and STILL cannot type well without careful revision before sending (some of which is not careful enough) I have a certain amount of sympathy for him.

(You pickier types may chastise me (verbally only, unless we come to some agreement) in the event that "proof read " is now considered either a single or a hyphenated word.)

(in reply to MsSonnetMarwood)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: why is it so hard to find a Mistress that wonts a g... - 7/26/2007 10:09:50 AM   
skareamoos


Posts: 46
Joined: 5/13/2005
Status: offline 		Aftr reedin sum ov the abuv I dont now if i should evn be on heer.  Damn!!!!!!!!  Treat them a bit more gently and they may blossom.

(in reply to skareamoos)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: why is it so hard to find a Mistress that wonts a g... - 7/26/2007 10:24:32 AM   
MisPandora


Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: chains314

Well Miss Pandora what i am doing is being hounest and up frunt about things i put in my profial what i would do . it dous not say that i must crous dress to serve it is an option i give .

If thats what thay or looking for i can serve in meny ways i just love to serve and pleas

Ms Sonnet's post hits it right on the head.  If I were to receive this painful note in my email, I'd delete it rather than try to decipher it.  If you're going to communicate in this medium, learn how to get by. Perhaps going RT and meeting people in a munch or group setting might relieve the pressure of having written communication issues?

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Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to chains314)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: why is it so hard to find a Mistress that wonts a g... - 7/26/2007 10:27:29 AM   
BBBTBW


Posts: 836
Joined: 5/21/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: chains314

Can any one tell me what i am doing that turns away Mistress looking for a good all around sub/slave


Don,

Because you don't follow thru.  I have on many occasions engaged with you in conversation.  I have encouraged you, assisted you in your verbage etc....but you come and go....you don't stick around long enough to develop a strong enough rapport.  You disappear. 

I recall the last time we spoke, you were helping with the hurrican situation in KS...couple months ago....You were supposed to get back to me, you didn't....If this is how you do with other DOMINANTS, it could be an indication why you are failing in your attempts.

Just insite from someone that has experience with you.

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"You keep using that word, I do not think it means what you think it means" -- Inigo Montoya, The Princess Bride

(in reply to chains314)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: why is it so hard to find a Mistress that wonts a g... - 7/26/2007 10:31:33 AM   
MiladyElaine


Posts: 1086
Joined: 10/10/2004
Status: offline 		Then there's the time length involved before you will be available to relocate.  you are narrowing your Mistress'  location down considerably.   

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(in reply to MsSonnetMarwood)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: why is it so hard to find a Mistress that wonts a g... - 7/26/2007 10:35:49 AM   
MisPandora


Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BBBTBW
Don,

Because you don't follow thru.  I have on many occasions engaged with you in conversation.  I have encouraged you, assisted you in your verbage etc....but you come and go....you don't stick around long enough to develop a strong enough rapport.  You disappear. 

I recall the last time we spoke, you were helping with the hurrican situation in KS...couple months ago....You were supposed to get back to me, you didn't....If this is how you do with other DOMINANTS, it could be an indication why you are failing in your attempts.

Just insite from someone that has experience with you.

Now we get to the meat and potatoes.....its not "what do I need to do" but "what do I need to stop doing that is turning all of these women away."

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to BBBTBW)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: why is it so hard to find a Mistress that wonts a g... - 7/26/2007 10:45:22 AM   
BBBTBW


Posts: 836
Joined: 5/21/2004
Status: offline 		In defense of Don, he is articulate, intelligent and talented.  He just lacks follow through skills when it comes to interpersonal relationships.  Is there any constructive advice anyone can give him to assist in the situation? 

From my point of view, I would say
  • make a folder on your desk top, call it "contacts
  • pull up notepad on your computer
  • copy and paste your last conversation with a particular person, put that persons contact name and place where they can be contacted
  • save the file as the date you are supposed to make the next contact with them and place it in the folder you created on your desktop
  • Before you make that contact, refresh yourself on the last conversation and move forward.  If they are not available at that time, make a re-contact note and re-save it as the date of the next contact delete the previous unless you need the conversation from it.


This will give you a time frame in which to make your contacts without falling behind or simply disappearing unless you want to.

*edited and edited again for a bunch of stupid mistakes

< Message edited by BBBTBW -- 7/26/2007 10:59:06 AM >

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"You keep using that word, I do not think it means what you think it means" -- Inigo Montoya, The Princess Bride

(in reply to MisPandora)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: why is it so hard to find a Mistress that wonts a g... - 7/26/2007 11:52:09 AM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: chains314

Can any one tell me what i am doing that turns away Mistress looking for a good all around sub/slave


I think you need to be very specific about what you are doing before any of us can give you any useful information.

Even with this we are merely people on a webforum. Someone who can get to observe you in meatlife might be a much more useful source of critique and suggestion.

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Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to chains314)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: why is it so hard to find a Mistress that wonts a g... - 7/26/2007 11:53:23 AM   
MsSonnetMarwood


Posts: 1898
Joined: 2/10/2005
From: Eastern Shore, Maryland
Status: offline 		The lack of follow through is really really common, unfortunately.   There have been subs that have been contacting me every six months or so for years - every time hoping that I'm still single and perhaps interested in them.  Never mind that they can't really remember much about me (or I them) because so much time has passed.  

There's really only so many times you can have the same "getting to know you" conversation with the same person, you know?   If you don't ever move forward, you never do get anywhere.





_____________________________

~Ms. Sonnet Marwood~

Deja Moo: The feeling you've heard this bull somewhere before.

(in reply to BBBTBW)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: why is it so hard to find a Mistress that wonts a g... - 7/26/2007 1:24:00 PM   
skareamoos


Posts: 46
Joined: 5/13/2005
Status: offline 		Hey, Ms Sonnet ... If I were in or near Maryland you would have a different sort of problem with me:  How do I get rid of this old fool without losing my temper and upchucking.  While I would never wish you any such digestive miscarriage, I wish I were there.

(Have a great day/week/month/year, kid)

(in reply to MsSonnetMarwood)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: why is it so hard to find a Mistress that wonts a g... - 7/26/2007 4:44:56 PM   
planomaid


Posts: 77
Joined: 10/4/2004
Status: offline 		As I have learned, sometimes too much honesty up front is a turn-off.  Statistically speaking, there are more submissive males out there searching for dommen women than the reverse.  Which means that the woman, who normally gets to pick and choose her relationships to start, has even more 'power' in the selection of who she chooses to spend time with. 

In order to catch her eye you need to stand above your competition.  What you write in your profile, in responses to posts here, and especially in emails to a domme, are critically important.  Try to minimize the things you have control over, like spelling and grammar.  Do a little research about a potential domme before you send her an email. If she happens to dislikes dogs, don't talk up about how much you like dogs. You don't have to lie (generally a bad idea at any time) or mislead (another bad idea) in your communcation.  Try to balance who you are with what she might be looking for.  As time goes on and you feel that there is something between the two of you, you can start to tell her more.

Listen to what your heart says and follow it.  It may take longer trying to rise above the others, but you also may just find the right person to be with.

(in reply to chains314)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: why is it so hard to find a Mistress that wonts a g... - 7/26/2007 8:24:08 PM   
chains314


Posts: 81
Joined: 3/11/2006
Status: offline 		Ms. Sonnet Marwood i think it is age

(in reply to MsSonnetMarwood)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: why is it so hard to find a Mistress that wonts a g... - 7/26/2007 8:42:07 PM   
MsSonnetMarwood


Posts: 1898
Joined: 2/10/2005
From: Eastern Shore, Maryland
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: chains314

Ms. Sonnet Marwood i think it is age


Very cryptic.

_____________________________

~Ms. Sonnet Marwood~

Deja Moo: The feeling you've heard this bull somewhere before.

(in reply to chains314)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: why is it so hard to find a Mistress that wonts a g... - 7/26/2007 8:52:00 PM   
MissMagnolia


Posts: 3636
Status: offline 		planomaid hit the nail on the head for Me. The ratio of Dominants to subs is far from equal. You MUST have something that sets you apart and get's My attention. I have trouble remembering who is who, so a photo should be included. 
When I open a message, I expect to see a greeting, a coherent message spelled correctly (though I don't expect everyone to have perfect grammar and spelling, a mistake or two isn't a death sentence) and an appropriate ending. "Hi miss how is ya wanna chat?", isn't going to cut it. Neither is a rambling diatribe about your wants and needs and details of the plight of African American slaves in the 1800's (yes, that was a real message, deleted after the first few lines!!).
I have also had numerous slaves and subs message Me, then message Me again a few weeks later, saying the exact same thing as in the first message. If you make contact, be sure it is because that particular Mistress is attractive to you in whatever way. When I feel like I am just one of the crowd, who the slave/sub messages just because they have tried everyone but Me so far, I have no interest whatsoever.

Best of luck!!

(in reply to chains314)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: why is it so hard to find a Mistress that wonts a g... - 7/26/2007 8:53:24 PM   
chains314


Posts: 81
Joined: 3/11/2006
Status: offline 		Well the time for relocate is about how long it would tack to get every thing in order to move no one would just drop every thing and move to some one with out getting to know them

(in reply to MisPandora)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: why is it so hard to find a Mistress that wonts a g... - 7/26/2007 9:02:33 PM   
chains314


Posts: 81
Joined: 3/11/2006
Status: offline 		Please allow me to introduce my self my name is Don/chains314, i am 55 years old.   i live in St. Louis MO. I am a submissive in search of an old school type Mistress.  i have been in the BDSM life style for over 25 years and i have served old guard style for 19 years.  I am a service oriented sub/slave, i can serve in many ways; maid, house boy, yard person, chauffeur, errand boy, or just about any position one would wish me to serve.    i have many items in my toy box that will allow you to help me conform  to the slave you desire.  Some of my interests include strict discipline, cuffs, chains, collars, gags, cages, house work and serving as a maid.  i have 4 French maids uniforms and one Long Victorian maids uniform, i love high heels . i make most of my things.  i love building bondage furniture and doing leather work.  Due to past experiences i am reluctant to try some activities but i am open to exploring once a foundation of trust has been established.  My hard limits are dangerous activity within reason, illegal activity within reason, electro play within reason. i would like to find a Dominant Women with the same interests to serve as a partner friend and Mistress.  For approximately the next year, i can not relocate permanently but being self employed (i am a builder i reproduce or repair Victorian homes) i can make time to devote to a Mistress in service and friendship i can travel occasionally.  If you think i can be of service to you perhaps you would grant me the honor and privilege of serving You in that way.  One of my personal hobbies is my Passion for the Victorian/Edwardian life style i have a vast library on the Victorian ERA if any one would wish any info on it i would be pleased to e mail it to them.   Sincerely and Humbly, chains 314  

thats what i send them

(in reply to MsSonnetMarwood)
Profile   Post #: 40
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