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RE: More minorities in the lifstyle - 7/27/2007 4:30:54 AM

MissDiscipline

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I am an equal opportunist.../"_--

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RE: More minorities in the lifstyle - 7/27/2007 5:02:43 AM

MsPleasure

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I believe it has more to do with how we were raised. I never heard about BDSM when I was a child, teen or young adult. I was exposed to it a few years ago on a cable channel when they featured a black female that was a domina with her military husbands support. I was intriqued then but became active about a year ago by way of the internet. I think you are lucky to explore at a young age.....I wish I knew about this YEARS ago.

I do believe there are a lot of closet BDSM minorities....we just don't talk about these things openly. I've brought the topic up to a few people only to find out that some are active, know others involved or curious. I also think that most minorities think BDSM is too kinky because more of the painful side is exposed (whips, spanking, torture) I don't think a lot know there is a pampering, pleasurable, have it your way side to bdsm...(at least I didn't). To get more minorities involved in BDSM, I just refer them to websites I use and talk about it.

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RE: More minorities in the lifstyle - 7/27/2007 5:31:13 AM

sambamanslilgirl

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quote:

ORIGINAL: blkstick26

Of course im excluding blk males because i dont consider them minorities in the lifestyle.

why?

i'm a Back submissive who lives in a Black neighborhood and i can tell you from firsthand experience that i get more curious stares and cackles of laughter from people within our race (young and old alike) than i do if i'm around Whites. hmmm - i wonder why? (being sarcastic here). many within our race would never understand why this Black woman is owned by a White Daddy ...nor would many grasp the concept that it's not slavery but consensual slavery. some might confuse being a dominant as a sexual way to pick up women (i've had that happen to me before) ...even was told by one Black guy that i was sick because i allow my "father" to have sex with me - clearly he didn't understand the concept of a Daddy-daughter D/s dynamic.

let me put it this way - sitting on the bus, i can get whispers and glares whenever Black people see my ankle chains (with locks) and collar - even had a bus preacher trying to convert me. now take that same bus and fill it with Whites or other races, no one would pay any mind to what's on my ankles and neck. matter of fact, those in the lifestyle (and i can tell ) would smile, nod and/or comment.

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RE: More minorities in the lifstyle - 7/27/2007 5:40:22 AM

mnottertail

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Hey, lilgirl----

exactly what I said, the peer pressure I have seen is OVERWHELMINGLY from the black on black more than anything---very unaccepting of deviations. But, I am just caspar the friendly ghost out here, doing some friendly haunting.

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RE: More minorities in the lifstyle - 7/27/2007 7:13:02 AM

MzMia

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Descara

A lot of thoughts are flowing in my head at the moment, but most of them have already been said. What I will add is that if you look at any given community racial minorities are in the minority in most if not all of them. The BDSM scene is no exception. It does seem to lend some logic to why we're called minorities...and I don't mean to sound flip. Seems to me you only find a majority of a particular racial minority in situations that are specifically created for those minorities.

I agree with everything you said Descara.
Also, there are MANY Black and Hispanics that are a lot KINKIER than many of you here may know.

We tend to not be as public, and many of us are private people.
But believe me, Black people, Hispanic people and many White people are a lot kinkier than many here
realize.

We just do in privately at home, or in smaller settings.

***We do have Black Beat!****
Why do you think HUNDREDS of Black folks are going to attend Black Beat {MzMia included} in a few weeks?????

I also know for a FACT, that MANY minorities would especially NOT be comfortable in settings in which they
are either the ONLY one there, or maybe one of 3 or 4 in attendance.

I am sure most of you kink authorities would FEEL the exact same way that you do now going in settings, to "play"
in which you were the only WHITE person there.
To tell you the truth, my FAVORITE types of clubs to go to are GAY clubs.
I love to go to GAY clubs, they tend to be very accepting of all people and I feel very comfortable partying with them.
Anyone want to meet me at Drag Queen Bingo night?

I adore most of you people here at CM, this is my last word on this thread.

Peace

< Message edited by MzMia -- 7/27/2007 7:26:44 AM >

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RE: More minorities in the lifstyle - 7/27/2007 7:15:37 AM

CreativeDominant

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkDaddyZ

quote:

ORIGINAL: goddessAVA
My ex-Husband was sub to me for 10 years and African American, since then however, unless it is a black male wanting me to use racial slurs, I have not had the opportunity to play with any one identifying as black and sub-so I ask you, why not? I would LOVE to!

That's an interesting observation. I know that when I used to bottom, I got off on the racial aspect of play, the slurs and the whole nine yards and in some elements of play today, I still get off on that, it's a taboo and part of my draw to the lifestyle was tapping into taboos.

I had a right wing submissive play partner that had her views and we rarely agreed on politics or anything but our play dynamic when it came to race and rape play was like no other but that's hijacking this thread

Shhhhhhhhhhhhhh...careful...you are not supposed to mention that you could use "race in a negative way" during play. That might get you some flames from certain elements...

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RE: More minorities in the lifstyle - 7/27/2007 7:17:37 AM

LadyHeart

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Stephann

But I'd briefly ask, is that in stark contrast to the numbers of these minorities you see in your day to day life?

Stephan

Very definitely
:))
LH

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RE: More minorities in the lifstyle - 7/27/2007 7:35:44 AM

sambamanslilgirl

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glad you mentioned peer pressure - the pressure is more than overwhelming every time i step out the door and go out in public in my own neighborhood.

for example, a couple of young adults (probably about 25) were standing behind me in line with comments - damn, i thought slavery was over ...nah nigga she's someone's ho ...you must love bleep a white man etc etc - don't get me started in what i get from some of the members a Black Baptist church on Sunday morning that i sometimes attend.

i don't let the mean yet misunderstood comments bother me however there are times i do get extremely nervous walking down the street just to ride the bus. i feel safer reviewing a rock show (because i simply blend in with the other "collared" metalheads and gothic vamps) than i do being around my own race.

< Message edited by sambamanslilgirl -- 7/27/2007 7:37:02 AM >

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RE: More minorities in the lifstyle - 7/27/2007 7:38:42 AM

mnottertail

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In Buffalo New York, I walked in with my black slave at a black gathering for some cause or another at the Adam's Mark the onliest white boy in sight.........you talk about crackers don't know how to act............

Of course, me being me, I thought it was a fuckin' riot------ my poor date (as it were) was absolutely mortified.

< Message edited by mnottertail -- 7/27/2007 7:39:13 AM >

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RE: More minorities in the lifstyle - 7/27/2007 7:41:59 AM

sambamanslilgirl

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you brought up an interesting point - i don't attend many fetish/play/dungeon parties because it was odd being the only collared black woman in attendance ...and i was with a friend (who btw is white) the last time i went to one. people were asking him if they could talk to me thinking i was his submissive.

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...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...

...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

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RE: More minorities in the lifstyle - 7/27/2007 7:44:39 AM

sambamanslilgirl

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quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

In Buffalo New York, I walked in with my black slave at a black gathering for some cause or another at the Adam's Mark the onliest white boy in sight.........you talk about crackers don't know how to act............

Of course, me being me, I thought it was a fuckin' riot------ my poor date (as it were) was absolutely mortified.

i should start hanging out with you then

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...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...

...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

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RE: More minorities in the lifstyle - 7/27/2007 7:45:17 AM

MzMia

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Dang it sambamanslilgirl, come on to Black Beat next year.
It was a White submissive male that loves going, that talked ME into it.

< Message edited by MzMia -- 7/27/2007 7:46:00 AM >

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Namaste'
To Each His/Her Own
"DENIAL ain't just a river in Egypt." Mark Twain

What's your favorite fetish?
"My partner's whisper"--bloomswell

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RE: More minorities in the lifstyle - 7/27/2007 7:48:11 AM

mnottertail

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Yeah, it has gotta be a tough road to hoe, lilgirl---it is very much your side that is the one and only nearly all the time, but you look at the sites out there, afroerotik and what not, black folk are freaky in big numbers because well they are just folk, and it aint got much to do with a superior tanning solution........but they are back in the closet days which makes it hard for folk that think it just aughta be normal.

Ron

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RE: More minorities in the lifstyle - 7/27/2007 7:50:27 AM

MzMia

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When I was 15 I used to smoke pot in the closet.
Being in closets can be a lot of fun, we ain't all got to be doing shit for you
White folks to watch.
Leave us alone in our fucking closets.
Peace

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Namaste'
To Each His/Her Own
"DENIAL ain't just a river in Egypt." Mark Twain

What's your favorite fetish?
"My partner's whisper"--bloomswell

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RE: More minorities in the lifstyle - 7/27/2007 7:52:30 AM

mnottertail

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LOL, I ain't tryin to drag you outside the closet. I am happy where I am at and ----pretty much---- fuck everybody else.

I am an equal opportunity curmudgeon.

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RE: More minorities in the lifstyle - 7/27/2007 7:52:43 AM

domiguy

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I once took a dying child to Freaknik as part of the Make a Wish program.....Does that count?

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RE: More minorities in the lifstyle - 7/27/2007 8:09:54 AM

sambamanslilgirl

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MzMia

Dang it sambamanslilgirl, come on to Black Beat next year.
It was a White submissive male that loves going, that talked ME into it.

will have to save next year's date and attend

_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...

...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

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RE: More minorities in the lifstyle - 7/27/2007 8:24:23 AM

domiguy

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When is black beat? ....I would like to attend...If only I could get down the handshake it would be all good.

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RE: More minorities in the lifstyle - 7/27/2007 9:27:41 AM

dovie

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here you go domiguy,

http://www.blackbeatinc.org/

just don't call me "a m i n o r i t y," and we're cool...i don't mind being "in the," but whew....barriers with internalization and all that.....(which i fully own and take medication for)

btw....if you come to BB this year, i'll show you the secret handshake.

dream well,
dovie

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RE: More minorities in the lifstyle - 7/27/2007 9:42:53 AM

LightHeartedMaam

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What's with the constant weighing and measuring of how many colors are present at a gathering? I really could care less UNLESS someone appraches me BECAUSE they are pushing the race issue (As in "Hi, do you like (insert color here) Doms/Dommes/sub/slaves"?. In which case, I'll see that as some kind of confrontational agenda and treat them like any other person trying to play that game.

I refuse DOMS and DOMMES and SWITCHES and all females as suitable play partners no matter what color they are. My preference is for het or gay submissive males. Plain and simple.

If you go to a new gathering no matter WHAT color you are, you are pretty much part of the wallpaper unless you involve yourself with the group instead of hunting for a play partner right off the bat.

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