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being owned or being loved - 7/2/2005 8:36:53 PM   
kisshou


Posts: 2425
Joined: 2/11/2005
Status: offline 		How would you describe the difference between being owned and being loved?

If you had to choose one or the other, which/why would you make that choice?

Profile   Post #: 1
RE: being owned or being loved - 7/2/2005 8:40:26 PM   
EmeraldSlave2


Posts: 3645
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		Being owned means giving ultimate authority to another to be used and useful as their property.

Being loved means being in a state of profound emotional attachment and understanding with another.

They can co-exist.

With the Owner, I would choose being owned. With the boyfriend I choose being loved.

(in reply to kisshou)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: being owned or being loved - 7/2/2005 8:42:02 PM   
Tempestspet


Posts: 360
Joined: 1/13/2005
Status: offline 		Why can't it be both. And I would not make the choice...smiles...

But thankfully I don't have to. The dynamic we have very much has both love, and ownership.

Interesting topic though, thank you.

Tempest's pet
jennifer

(in reply to kisshou)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: being owned or being loved - 7/2/2005 8:45:40 PM   
perfection20005


Posts: 419
Joined: 4/20/2005
Status: offline 		I think that you can have both, but they can be seperate also.
Being owned, by itself, the Master/Mistress treats you as they would property. They would make sure no harm came to you, but if it did, they could replace you easily. I think the owners have no deep feelings for their property. If they were to be in the vanilla world, they wouldn't be together except for sex.
Being loved, in my opinion, means that both parties have deeply rooted feelings for each other. If they had to live in the vanilla world only, they could function as one. Both parties believe that the others needs matter.
If I could choose, I would take both. Which is what I currently have. If my Master didn't want to be in the D/s world, we could make it in the nilla world just fine. The D/s for us is just a perk.
I know that there will be many responses to this, and I didn't mean to offend anyone. This is just my opinion!

perfection

(in reply to kisshou)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: being owned or being loved - 7/2/2005 8:57:46 PM   
betticus


Posts: 12
Joined: 12/1/2004
Status: offline 		I love this question. I need someone who is very dependent on me and who needs to have a strong male in order for her to feel secure. At the same time I have a very loving side and I have a tendency to grow extremely fond of the woman that I am with if she is right for me. I would say to the point of love.

I've pretty much given up hope that there is someone out there who wants to be owned and adored at the same time.

(in reply to perfection20005)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: being owned or being loved - 7/2/2005 9:00:29 PM   
nonuts4thshoney


Posts: 550
Joined: 6/12/2005
From: Southern California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: EmeraldSlave2

Being owned means giving ultimate authority to another to be used and useful as their property.

Being loved means being in a state of profound emotional attachment and understanding with another.

They can co-exist.

With the Owner, I would choose being owned. With the boyfriend I choose being loved.



Great Answer!


but i dont gotta a boyfriend (wouldn't want one) or a girlfriend.

With Master i couldn't choose one or the other. i would always want both with her.
BUT...if i had to choose just one i'd choose to be loved. People die from lack of love. i'd just own myself and beat myself up from time to time if i felt the need to .. LOL!!

(in reply to EmeraldSlave2)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: being owned or being loved - 7/2/2005 9:08:22 PM   
RandBcouple


Posts: 86
Joined: 5/19/2005
Status: offline 		if i didn't feel loved i could not give myself to the owner, in my relationship it goes hand in hand...if i had to choose one or the other i'd choose love.

~hugs~
Babygirl

(in reply to nonuts4thshoney)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: being owned or being loved - 7/2/2005 9:13:24 PM   
quietkitten


Posts: 1082
Joined: 2/5/2005
From: Alberta, Canada
Status: offline 		For me they are one in the same.
Of course I want to be loved, I think nearly everyone does. However, what I want is to be loved by someone who wants to be in control of me and my life. I want to be the most important posession they own.

(in reply to kisshou)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: being owned or being loved - 7/2/2005 9:19:51 PM   
betticus


Posts: 12
Joined: 12/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: quietkitten

For me they are one in the same.
Of course I want to be loved, I think nearly everyone does. However, what I want is to be loved by someone who wants to be in control of me and my life. I want to be the most important posession they own.


I wish that there were more people like you.

(in reply to quietkitten)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: being owned or being loved - 7/2/2005 9:23:36 PM   
quietkitten


Posts: 1082
Joined: 2/5/2005
From: Alberta, Canada
Status: offline 		Thank you betticus.

(in reply to betticus)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: being owned or being loved - 7/2/2005 9:30:05 PM   
stormsfate


Posts: 849
Joined: 2/1/2005
Status: offline 		Prior to meeting my owner, I would have simply chosen to be owned. I was not looking for love. He had other ideas, however, and wanted it all...and took it all, so I have both and consider myself most fortunate.


best regards,
fate

*Edited to add that I realize I didn't answer your questions...lol. Its just the best I can do at this time in the morning :)

< Message edited by stormsfate -- 7/2/2005 9:31:34 PM >

_____________________________

Vision? What do you know about MY vision? My vision would turn your world upside down, tear asunder your illusions and the sanctuary of your own ignorance crashing down around you! Now ask yourself, are you really ready to see that vision? [/size

(in reply to kisshou)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: being owned or being loved - 7/3/2005 1:22:58 AM   
lonewolf05


Posts: 830
Joined: 6/21/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: kisshou

How would you describe the difference between being owned and being loved?

If you had to choose one or the other, which/why would you make that choice?



=========

since i have never felt loved, including childhood, including my 3 wives,--i only know 1 mistress real time, and there was emotional love there either. she had her #1 and i was a 3rd wheel.

to choose? since i have only known ownership, i can only choose what i am familiar with.


_____________________________

"there is no gravity, life sucks!"


(in reply to kisshou)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: being owned or being loved - 7/3/2005 2:34:31 AM   
ElektraUkM


Posts: 309
Joined: 2/19/2005
Status: offline 		Hmm... not many people have answered the question, have they..? lol "I would choose both" indeed! Naughty!

I would choose being loved.

(Luckily I too have both at the moment).

~ Elektra

(in reply to lonewolf05)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: being owned or being loved - 7/3/2005 5:13:02 AM   
sudja


Posts: 155
Joined: 2/8/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: kisshou

How would you describe the difference between being owned and being loved?

If you had to choose one or the other, which/why would you make that choice?



Ownership tends to have more responsibility attached than loving (although it shouldn't).

However, as others have noted, they can and do co-exist, and I would not do one without the other.

If required, however, Ownership for the additional securityas a "good" Owner is responsible for my emotional well-being regardless.

sudja

(in reply to kisshou)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: being owned or being loved - 7/3/2005 5:14:25 AM   
sudja


Posts: 155
Joined: 2/8/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: perfection20005

I think that you can have both, but they can be seperate also.
Being owned, by itself, the Master/Mistress treats you as they would property. They would make sure no harm came to you, but if it did, they could replace you easily. I think the owners have no deep feelings for their property. If they were to be in the vanilla world, they wouldn't be together except for sex.



You couldn't be more wrong with this generalization.

Otherwise there wouldn't be a need for places like this, Dominants and submissives could just line up and take turns owning and being owned.

sudja

(in reply to perfection20005)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: being owned or being loved - 7/3/2005 6:17:54 AM   
Bix


Posts: 1
Joined: 6/29/2005
Status: offline 		one or two thoughts from a Master, if I may…

My slave is happy to be owned by Me; that is because she gifted herself to Me because of O/our love. she loves being owned because she loves and is loved so much. she is My most precious possession, and is treated as such. I am immensely proud of her.

Paradoxically, although she is My property, if I ever wished to part with her (something which I cannot foresee as ever being likely) I would not discard her like other property. My responsibility for her personal wellbeing and dignity would extend to guiding her to a new place where she could prosper apart from Me. Until such independence, or other dependence, had been established she would be My responsibility. This would endure even if love no longer existed between U/us.

My slave giving herself to Me totally and without limitation was one of the most wonderful and moving experiences of My entire life. My devoted lady inspired Me to rise to everything which Acceptance involves. she had the courage to place herself in alignment with her true inner being. I followed. For U/us L/ove and O/ownership are inseparable. she is Mine.

her Loving Master

ps how do I lose the vanilla tag? lol

< Message edited by Bix -- 7/3/2005 6:35:10 AM >

(in reply to sudja)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: being owned or being loved - 7/3/2005 9:57:03 AM   
LaMspeach


Posts: 794
Joined: 12/4/2004
From: Philadelphia area, PA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: kisshou

How would you describe the difference between being owned and being loved?

If you had to choose one or the other, which/why would you make that choice?




Being owned is feeling complete ... being loved with out being owned has always left me feeling incomplete.

Of course i would choose having both -- but that isn't always possiable. So if i had to choose only one it would be being owned by a caring Master that allows me to be who i need to be.


_____________________________

peach ~ LordandMasters devoted alpha slave
"Only when the year has grown cold does one know that the pine and cypress are the last to wither"



(in reply to kisshou)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: being owned or being loved - 7/3/2005 10:01:52 AM   
Davesgirl


Posts: 89
Joined: 5/13/2005
Status: offline 		Despite being fortunate to have both, love and being owned both by the same wonderful Man....I would have to choose love. I couldnt fully submit to someone that I didnt love as well. For me, the two are interconnected....

Dont know if that makes any sense, but it works for me

(in reply to LaMspeach)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: being owned or being loved - 7/3/2005 10:04:15 AM   
sarbonn


Posts: 203
Joined: 3/23/2004
Status: offline 		If I had to choose JUST one of the two, I'd choose neither.

_____________________________

Give a man a fish, he eats for a day...
...teach a man to fish, he steals your fishing hole and then charges you for the fish.

(in reply to kisshou)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: being owned or being loved - 7/3/2005 10:08:27 AM   
zaynab


Posts: 377
Joined: 6/20/2005
Status: offline 		for me, they are one in the same... being owned is being loved

(in reply to kisshou)
Profile   Post #: 20
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