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RE: Being a slut - 7/11/2005 9:21:46 PM

SweetDommes

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quote:

ORIGINAL: EmeraldSlave2

For me slut is about ATTITUDE, not actions. A virgin can be a slut. A monogamous married woman can be a slut. I can be a slut even if I don't have any sex at all for 8 months.

It's not about being horny, it's about having an attitude towards sex and sexuality of openness, freedom, joy, the DESIRE to express sexuality in as many ways and means with others as possible, with absolutely no shame or regret, loving the act of sex and the dance of sexuality for its own sake.

And this would prove that we do, indeed have different definitions of the word "slut" - to me, it's a combination of the actions and the attitude. Without the action, it's just a person who is in tune with him/herself and their own sexuality - to me, what you describe is not a slut. I accept and understand that is what you mean when you use it, but please do not get upset with me when I use my definition (which I gave earlier) and talk about possible contamination of the plumbing.

< Message edited by SweetDommes -- 7/11/2005 9:22:05 PM >

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RE: Being a slut - 7/11/2005 10:20:10 PM

Youcantmakemeeee

Posts: 36
Joined: 7/4/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: SweetDommes

quote:

ORIGINAL: EmeraldSlave2

For me slut is about ATTITUDE, not actions. A virgin can be a slut. A monogamous married woman can be a slut. I can be a slut even if I don't have any sex at all for 8 months.

It's not about being horny, it's about having an attitude towards sex and sexuality of openness, freedom, joy, the DESIRE to express sexuality in as many ways and means with others as possible, with absolutely no shame or regret, loving the act of sex and the dance of sexuality for its own sake.

And this would prove that we do, indeed have different definitions of the word "slut" - to me, it's a combination of the actions and the attitude. Without the action, it's just a person who is in tune with him/herself and their own sexuality - to me, what you describe is not a slut. I accept and understand that is what you mean when you use it, but please do not get upset with me when I use my definition (which I gave earlier) and talk about possible contamination of the plumbing.

Hmm, I'm not quite sure whether the term slut could be just the attitude or if it also needs the action. I think of the word submissive and how I see that. I have known I was submissive more than half my life, but the question is, was I submissive before I actually had that first experience. Can someone be submissive and not be someone's submissive? Can someone be dominant and not be someone's Dom/me? I would say yes to those, and if I said yes to those, would logic suggest that I would have to also agree that someone could be a slut without actually going out and doing it? What do y'all think?

C.

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RE: Being a slut - 7/11/2005 11:23:26 PM

SweetDommes

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I can be dominant without being a Domme/Mistress ... but "dominant" is a description, not a 'title'.

Calling someone (yourself or someone else) a slut is giving them a title, which I think is the difference. In my opinion, "Domme" is a title, which has to be earned through behaviour, just like "slut" - through attitude AND actions, not attitude alone.

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RE: Being a slut - 7/12/2005 3:05:24 AM

Youcantmakemeeee

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Hmm, SweetDommes, you might be right. I don't know. However, IMHO, I see the word 'dominant' or 'submissive' or the like to be both a title and a description depending on how it's used. But whether that's true or not, I wonder about something else. If you are a Domme, would you still be a Domme if you had no sub/slave? That title is still true whether you act upon it or not, right? So, if that's the case, then isn't it possible to be a slut and not be acting upon it?

Oh dear, I feel I'm rambling. Someone stop me! <smiles>

Respectfully,
C.

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RE: Being a slut - 7/12/2005 5:28:44 AM

EmeraldSlave2

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Joined: 1/1/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: SweetDommes

and talk about possible contamination of the plumbing.

I just know too many monogamous people who have diseases and pregnancies.

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RE: Being a slut - 7/12/2005 9:11:53 AM

SweetDommes

Posts: 3313
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Youcantmakemeeee

Hmm, SweetDommes, you might be right. I don't know. However, IMHO, I see the word 'dominant' or 'submissive' or the like to be both a title and a description depending on how it's used. But whether that's true or not, I wonder about something else. If you are a Domme, would you still be a Domme if you had no sub/slave? That title is still true whether you act upon it or not, right? So, if that's the case, then isn't it possible to be a slut and not be acting upon it?

Oh dear, I feel I'm rambling. Someone stop me! <smiles>

Respectfully,
C.

At this point, with or without a sub, I have earned the title from many people - in fact, this screen name was given to the two of us by one of our friends (and many have concurred with his opinion). However, personally, I don't feel like a Domme when I don't have a sub - I am still dominant, but a Domme? Nope.

quote:

ORIGINAL: EmeraldSlave2

I just know too many monogamous people who have diseases and pregnancies.

I know those people too - and in my experience, 70% or more of them are either not really monogamous (or weren't in the past) or chose to pair with someone who isn't/wasn't and whichever one it was, wasn't careful at some point.

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RE: Being a slut - 7/12/2005 12:26:04 PM

plantlady64

Posts: 755
Joined: 5/19/2005
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Hi There,
To me BDSM is way more about the power exchange than the sex now. When I first found myself interested I thought they were hand in hand. Once I started actually dating Dom's I found most of my dates wouldn't even let me touch them between their waists and knees initially. I was very frustrated. After a time I actually started understanding they are separate functions that do go hand in hand, but not always fully linked together. Now I catch myself craving the power exchange more than the intercourse. If my Master said I'd have to pick between a good spanking or getting screwed for a month I'd pick the spanking as it's what I crave more now.
If you're looking to use BDSM as a cover to get laid often I think you may be in the wrong arena. Maybe you should join swinger groups instead. Fucking just for the feel of it all is a swinger forte and not so much a BDSM one in my mind opinion.
Sincerely,
sub suzanne

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RE: Being a slut - 7/13/2005 5:56:34 PM

littlespike

Posts: 80
Joined: 5/21/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha

quote:

ORIGINAL: rewarded321

It seems like sluts are not popular here at all. I wonder why not more Mistresses take any interest in sluts/male whores?

I can't speak for all, but for me --

I don't want a slut/whore. I want to TURN a man into a slut/whore for me.

The whole instant slut, instant whore, instant groveling man is a turn off for me. I like the process of making him submit to my wishes.

Akasha

Hi Akasha

i think that is kind of hot... The process of making him turn from a strong man onto a loving obident male slave....

little spike

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