What do Femdoms want from Submissives? (Full Version)

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imtempting -> What do Femdoms want from Submissives? (7/8/2005 5:34:00 AM)

It was raised in another post that submissives dont really know what femdoms want from them.
Well here is your chance to tell us what do you really want?

What is the thrill that you get from Dominanting?

I'd even ask what extra can the Submissive do but I feel that is part of being the Dominant party. Training or telling a Submissive what to do.

Unless there is a book called. The Tweu Submissive handbook that every Submissive person is meant to own and read and fully comprhend before being owned.




onceburned -> RE: What do Femdoms want from Submissives? (7/8/2005 6:45:10 AM)

quote:

Unless there is a book called. The Tweu Submissive handbook that every Submissive person is meant to own and read


Of course there is ! You should have gotten your study manual when you applied for your certificate. You are a licensed submissive, aren't you?




imtempting -> RE: What do Femdoms want from Submissives? (7/8/2005 6:48:16 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: onceburned

Of course there is ! You should have gotten your study manual when you applied for your certificate. You are a licensed submissive, aren't you?


Oh no is that my problem. Darn if only I knew earlier.




KarbonCopy -> RE: What do Femdoms want from Submissives? (7/8/2005 9:21:15 AM)

pffft You're not licenced?


Talk to the hand boyee




Shadowsdream -> RE: What do Femdoms want from Submissives? (7/8/2005 10:03:23 AM)

I want the submissive to strive to attain their full potential in all things not only to better themselves but to taste My pride in their accomplishments.

I want the submissive to bend their knees to Me not because I say they must but because they can't imagine any other place to bring more comfort than at My feet.

I want the submissive to be classy in the way they present themselves publically yet be comfortable and accepting of their sluttiness in privacy.

I want the submissive to be service oriented while simutaneously craving the pain I need to give to be fulfilled.

I want the submissive to be bi-sexual and make no excuses for it.

I will stop here for now.




lonewolf05 -> RE: What do Femdoms want from Submissives? (7/8/2005 11:28:46 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: onceburned

quote:

Unless there is a book called. The Tweu Submissive handbook that every Submissive person is meant to own and read


Of course there is ! You should have gotten your study manual when you applied for your certificate. You are a licensed submissive, aren't you?

----------------------
uh oh. i have to update mine.........lol

the wolf




GoddessDustyGold -> RE: What do Femdoms want from Submissives? (7/8/2005 12:31:46 PM)

If you are referring to Aakasha's post regarding what makes a femdom tick, then I suppose that is one way of looking at it. That could be another way to pose the comment that submissives may not really know what a femdom wants.
I want you to want it, and not just agree to something because by doing My bidding you will get some playtime in exchange.
I want you to derive pleasure, satisfaction and contentment from your service.
I want you to choose your Lady carefully and know that you are dedicated to Her.
I want you to know that this is your calling, this is what makes you happy and complete, whether it is sitting at My feet, or making My morning tea, or being tied down and taking the flogging.
I want you to know that I will take, and be happy to have Me take.
I want you to be honest, with yourself and with Me.
What I *don't* want:
I don't want you to contact Me because you like My photo and you think that you can bend *My* clear definitions of "slave" into how you wish I would define "slave".
I don't want you to just "serve" Me because you have the expectation that you will get playtime in exchange.
I don't want you to question and whine when I instruct.
I don't want you to complain about why you can only call Me at a certain time.
I don't want you to bitch about the senselessness of any task, such as writing lines, that I may give.
I don't want you to struggle and be unhappy because you are trying to do things by a sub101 book
I don't want you to assume that because I have an ad on a site like collarme, it means that I am *hot to trot* and available for kink.
I don't want you to jump into and out of relationships that were never really relationships because you are still trying to figure out what is that makes *you* tick in this lifestyle.
It all comes down to this:
I want you to offer all of yourself to Me, with no reservations. I want it to all be equally satisfying to you. I want it to be who you are.
This is, of course what *I* want. I am looking for a 24/7 boy. That takes a lot of commitment.
I want *you* to figure out who *you* are, and what *you* really want and need. And I want you to take the time to figure that out, and not just jump in with both feet and think that you are ready for a relationship when you still don't even know what it is that will make you happy and content. It that means that you have to spend time, as much as necessary, with your local groups, getting experience, and learning the complete art of being a submissive, rather than a list of kink and a list of limits, then so be it. Take that time.
When you have figured that out, then all you have to do is find the Lady you connect with, and be ready.

*Edited (damnit!) to add: I don't know that I would call My Domination a thrill, except in the case of a really good scene, for which I am in the mood. Then I get that same endorphin rush that you do.
But it is a contentment for Me. A knowledge that I am absolutely free to be *Me*. I do not have to try to acquire any personality trait(s) that will make Me pleasing to any man. you take the time to get to know who *I* am. Take that time with any Lady, if you are serious.




lonewolf05 -> RE: What do Femdoms want from Submissives? (7/8/2005 12:38:12 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessDustyGold

If you are referring to Aakasha's post regarding what makes a femdom tick, then I suppose that is one way of looking at it. That could be another way to pose the comment that submissives may not really know what a femdom wants.
I want you to want it, and not just agree to something because by doing My bidding you will get some playtime in exchange.
I want you to derive pleasure, satisfaction and contentment from your service.
I want you to choose your Lady carefully and know that you are dedicated to Her.
I want you to know that this is your calling, this is what makes you happy and complete, whether it is sitting at My feet, or making My morning tea, or being tied down and taking the flogging.
I want you to know that I will take, and be happy to have Me take.
I want you to be honest, with yourself and with Me.
What I *don't* want:
I don't want you to contact Me because you like My photo and you think that you can bend *My* clear definitions of "slave" into how you wish I would define "slave".
I don't want you to just "serve" Me because you have the expectation that you will get playtime in exchange.
I don't want you to question and whine when I instruct.
I don't want you to complain about why you can only call Me at a certain time.
I don't want you to bitch about the senselessness of any task, such as writing lines, that I may give.
I don't want you to struggle and be unhappy because you are trying to do things by a sub101 book
I don't want you to assume that because I have an ad on a site like collarme, it means that I am *hot to trot* and available for kink.
I don't want you to jump into and out of relationships that were never really relationships because you are still trying to figure out what is that makes *you* tick in this lifestyle.
It all comes down to this:
I want you to offer all of yourself to Me, with no reservations. I want it to all be equally satisfying to you. I want it to be who you are.
This is, of course what *I* want. I am looking for a 24/7 boy. That takes a lot of commitment.
I want *you* to figure out who *you* are, and what *you* really want and need. And I want you to take the time to figure that out, and not just jump in with both feet and think that you are ready for a relationship when you still don't even know what it is that will make you happy and content. It that means that you have to spend time, as much as necessary, with your local groups, getting experience, and learning the complete art of being a submissive, rather than a list of kink and a list of limits, then so be it. Take that time.
When you have figured that out, then all you have to do is find the Lady you connect with, and be ready.

===============
an excellent piece of writing. thank You. clear, concise, and to the point.!

the wolf




SadisticPrincess -> RE: What do Femdoms want from Submissives? (7/8/2005 6:51:36 PM)

What pleases me most in a submissive is the desire to please!

Every femdom has somewhat different rules and desires, but I think the desire to have her submissive SERVE her readily and willingly, in the way that the femdom defines service, is a universal wish.




Grlwithboy -> RE: What do Femdoms want from Submissives? (7/8/2005 7:46:56 PM)

I want a submissive to be honest, not to just tell me what he or she thinks I want to hear. I want a submissive who has some fetishes that coincide with mine, because SM is not optional in my world. However, I want a submissive who views me as a leader, a confidante and a friend, and not the free fetish fulfillment soup kitchen.

I want a submissive who can relax and be human around me and not get hung up on someone else's ideas of what a FemDom should be or do. I want a submissive who, if he doesn't always obey perfectly WANTS to obey and acts accordingly. I want a submissive who is engaged with the people and things around him, is socially adept to some degree, someone I can be proud of among friends and neighbors, and someone I can respect no matter how humiliating our play might get.




OralPassions -> RE: What do Femdoms want from Submissives? (7/8/2005 10:08:38 PM)

What GoddessDustyGold says is absolutely has true understanding if you know who you are.

To know what a Mistress (Term I prefer) desires all depends on who she is and wants. I'm not a submissive that seeks a Pro Domina nor will I ever desire to pay for such services for example

What's important is to know who you are down to the roots of your very core of your being. When you discover that as a submissive male if that is your true nature being submissive. Then you will know what you have to offer a Mistress and you will take the time however long until you find the Mistress you are called upon to live a life of grateful servitude




OralPassions -> RE: What do Femdoms want from Submissives? (7/8/2005 10:12:06 PM)

Now I am gettin it,,, I could use a trainer on how to post properly,,, LOL

What GoddessDustyGold says is absolutely has true understanding if you know who you are.

To know what a Mistress (Term I prefer) desires all depends on who she is and wants. I'm not a submissive that seeks a Pro Domina nor will I ever desire to pay for such services for example

What's important is to know who you are down to the roots of your very core of your being. When you discover that as a submissive male if that is your true nature being submissive. Then you will know what you have to offer a Mistress and you will take the time however long until you find the Mistress you are called upon to live a life of grateful servitude




AAkasha -> RE: What do Femdoms want from Submissives? (7/8/2005 10:49:01 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: OralPassions

Now I am gettin it,,, I could use a trainer on how to post properly,,, LOL

What GoddessDustyGold says is absolutely has true understanding if you know who you are.

To know what a Mistress (Term I prefer) desires all depends on who she is and wants. I'm not a submissive that seeks a Pro Domina nor will I ever desire to pay for such services for example

What's important is to know who you are down to the roots of your very core of your being. When you discover that as a submissive male if that is your true nature being submissive. Then you will know what you have to offer a Mistress and you will take the time however long until you find the Mistress you are called upon to live a life of grateful servitude


Just curious. If you identify with this, and believe that submission is part of the core of your being, how would you feel in service to a Mistress that decided she wanted no more oral worship of any kind?

Akasha




SweetDommes -> RE: What do Femdoms want from Submissives? (7/8/2005 11:10:34 PM)

I pretty much agree with what everyone else said - we want a sub who loves to serve/please. We want someone who wants us to be happy. We want someone who will be honest with us when they aren't happy or when they disagree with us or when they want something. We want someone who is capable of being on their own but chooses not to be. ... we want a lot of things, too many to list at this point, especially when others have already said most of them.




OralPassions -> RE: What do Femdoms want from Submissives? (7/9/2005 1:56:44 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: OralPassions

Now I am gettin it,,, I could use a trainer on how to post properly,,, LOL

What GoddessDustyGold says is absolutely has true understanding if you know who you are.

To know what a Mistress (Term I prefer) desires all depends on who she is and wants. I'm not a submissive that seeks a Pro Domina nor will I ever desire to pay for such services for example

What's important is to know who you are down to the roots of your very core of your being. When you discover that as a submissive male if that is your true nature being submissive. Then you will know what you have to offer a Mistress and you will take the time however long until you find the Mistress you are called upon to live a life of grateful servitude


Just curious. If you identify with this, and believe that submission is part of the core of your being, how would you feel in service to a Mistress that decided she wanted no more oral worship of any kind?

Akasha


I really liked your direct question AAkasha! I can see you must have reviewed my profile to ask such a question. I have done some deep thorough and soul searching before your asking AAkasha. So I can answer this for you now honestly.
This would be an extreme sacrifice I would accept for the Mistress I sincerely would be devoted to out of loyalty and love. To take this one step further this submissive is preparing an application to a Goddess now who does not have Vaganal Worship listed as one of Ma'am's Interests. This submissive would not make such an application being aware this could be an issue and waste Goddess's time for my own personal requests of fufillment.
It is in complete an unselfish service to a Goddess I seek freedom from the bondage of self.

submissive ray





MHOO314 -> RE: What do Femdoms want from Submissives? (7/9/2005 6:13:02 AM)

It has been very well stated here, but let Me add My $1.25---I seek the commitment of submission, of service, of devotion--after that everything is simply reflections of that--if I start out giving you a "task" list, you will take that list and seek nothing beyond that--you could miss the subtleties of change or the changes in what I need----if one has the gift of submission--then as My needs change, there is a natural adaption--because it is the joy of serving that drives one--that pure pleasure in pleasing--expecting nothing more than Her smile.




Niran -> RE: What do Femdoms want from Submissives? (7/9/2005 7:32:26 PM)

What a great question. I've been thinking on this all day. What do I want from e? The answers that I came up with were that I wanted him to be able to see past his own needs, wants and desires, and to take pleasure from my wants, needs and desire. Also to learn to trust that my decision is what is in his best interest. He is getting a lot better. Some of the things are small, but it is the small things that indicate the best changes.


N

I also want him to be able to see outside his own little box and accept things for what they are. What do you do when your sub just doesnt GET IT???




LadyBeckett -> RE: What do Femdoms want from Submissives? (7/9/2005 8:04:25 PM)

There is only one thing for My submissive to remember. My pleasure is his priority, always. Hence, the pleasure is mutual.




strongnsubmissiv -> RE: What do Femdoms want from Submissives? (7/10/2005 10:50:41 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyBeckett

There is only one thing for My submissive to remember. My pleasure is his priority, always. Hence, the pleasure is mutual.



This got me thinking... as sexual human beings, we all have needs, regardless of our orientation. I agree that a submissive with a laundry list of kinks he/she wants fulfilled is a bit needy, but by the same token, if a submissive has needs (other than the obvious one of keeping their dominant pleased), does that make them any less of a genuine submissive? Does yin and yang not apply to this lifestyle?

sns




SweetDommes -> RE: What do Femdoms want from Submissives? (7/10/2005 11:19:35 AM)

We don't mind our boys having needs/wants - as long as at least most of them are compatable with what we want/like/desire.

The 'laundry list,' though ... definitely not interested in someone who *has* to have EVERYTHING on their list or they aren't interested. We've run into quite a few that we have gotten along with ... until they started in on what they have to have in a relationship - not what they want, not what they would like, not "I'd like to at least try this" but "I must have this, and I must have it at least X times per *insert time period*"




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