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co-workers ~~ who know something - 8/25/2007 12:25:02 PM

shyinini

Posts: 550
Joined: 5/4/2007
Status: offline

At work this week, a co worker who shares my office made a statement…
“I know who controls that relationship.”

She said that in response to the fact that I had to have a smoke and call my Sir.

A little back ground ~~ when I leave, I usually say, in order for the office to know where I am, "am going for a smoke, will be on my cell phone." If someone needs me, the office usally says, call her cell. My co-worker knows tis a futile thing to tell someone who needs me cause she knows I call "my man."

I told him … he asked how I felt. “Fucking proud” I answered.

“Good, you should be.”

This happened to anyone else? Just curious.

Sir's girl

_____________________________

With grace and gratitude, I am owned.
A Man who always seeks to be the best He can be for you
is the only Man truly worthy of being called Sir.

Post #: 1

RE: co-workers ~~ who know something - 8/25/2007 2:30:15 PM

slaveluci

Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
Status: offline

Before I left my last job to move here with Master, He called me on His lunch break everyday. My co-workers knew this but no one ever really commented one way or the other.

I would have to say the ones who seem to "know something" are my sister and mom. A few weeks ago I had to drive back to my home state for a few days and while I was there, we three went out for Chinese. We ended up talking about how things were going here for me and I mentioned something about packing Master's lunch for Him everyday and some of His favorite things to go in it, etc. My mom - who is 62 and pretty conservative - says to my sister: "I'll bet she escorts him to the door in nothing but an apron to kiss him and send him off with his lunch

!" Without missing a beat, I said "I don't have an apron."

We all got a chuckle out of this but it was indicative of just how aware they are of how I do serve Him. They never hear me call Him "Master" and, of course, they don't know of the actual BDSM aspects of our relationship, but they know I honor and respect Him and part of how I demonstrate this is taking care of Him and meeting His needs in ordinary, everyday ways.

As you said, shyinini, it made me feel proud that they recognized this and accept it as a good thing. Well, my sister doesn't operate that way but my mom taught me most of what I know as far as how to be a "good" woman to my "man."

I had to smile at it, for sure.........luci

_____________________________

To choose a good book, look in an inquisitor’s prohibited list. ~John Aikin

(in reply to shyinini)

Post #: 2

RE: co-workers ~~ who know something - 8/25/2007 4:50:14 PM

sambamanslilgirl

Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline

there have been times when Daddy has called me at the radio station on my cell (or while i'm anywhere in public) and i've said "Daddy" really loud for everyone to hear. *blushing* i enjoy watching people's reaction - what a rush observing their faces as i talk to Him. if i'm on air, i tell Him first that He's on the radio before we start teasing each other.

_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...

...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to shyinini)

Post #: 3

RE: co-workers ~~ who know something - 8/25/2007 4:54:25 PM

littlesarbonn

Posts: 1710
Joined: 12/3/2005
From: Stockton, California
Status: offline

Around here, people who want to somehow "tell" me that they've discovered my lifestyle almost ALWAYS do so by stating something along the lines of "Hey, have you ever googled someone just to find out more about them?" Almost always, this leads to "wow, there's some interesting stuff with your name." I've gotten to the point where I just shrug my shoulders and say something like "That's the Internets. Lots of stuff on it. Some true, some even more true."

_____________________________

<---- FYI, this picture looks JUST like me

http://www.littlesarbonn.com/Stickman/Stickman.htm
The Adventures of Stickman and the Unemployed Lego Spaceman

(in reply to shyinini)

Post #: 4

RE: co-workers ~~ who know something - 8/25/2007 7:26:52 PM

MisPandora

Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlesarbonn

Around here, people who want to somehow "tell" me that they've discovered my lifestyle almost ALWAYS do so by stating something along the lines of "Hey, have you ever googled someone just to find out more about them?" Almost always, this leads to "wow, there's some interesting stuff with your name." I've gotten to the point where I just shrug my shoulders and say something like "That's the Internets. Lots of stuff on it. Some true, some even more true."

"Yes, and?" followed by a dramatic pause effectively shoves them into a corner from which there is little escape for the confrontational nosy nelly who is poking in your business.

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to littlesarbonn)

Post #: 5

RE: co-workers ~~ who know something - 8/25/2007 8:35:42 PM

slaverosebeauty

Posts: 1941
Joined: 12/12/2004
From: Cali
Status: offline

One of my co-workers KNOWS, he is a member of another site and saw my page last week, when I was walking to my car, he asked me if i had ever heard of a certain site, I played dumb and then he winked, I laughed and asked, 'am I different online than in person??' He said MJ is a lucky man and that he would be happy t keep an eye on MJ's property while I am there.

IF someone from work or an assignment finds out, so what?! I am not doing anything illegal, and if they see or find me, then they cannot say anything without incriminating themselves. I know that a few of my co-workers are invovled in bdsm, because I recognize them from different sites and their info matches, I haven't said anything and won't its not my place to say anything, it DOES make things more interesting when I wear a skirt and heels then go out to the warehouse though. {giggles}

_____________________________

http://slaverosebeauty.livejournal.com/

"Friends live on in our hearts, regardless if they are here or not."

(in reply to MisPandora)

Post #: 6

RE: co-workers ~~ who know something - 8/25/2007 9:35:10 PM

BoiJen

Posts: 2608
Joined: 3/7/2007
Status: offline

I'm actually out to my co-workers....I get ragged about it at times and others it's just as simple of how's MsK? Do you guys have a date tonight? cool....so ehhh it's like any place else ya know?

(in reply to slaverosebeauty)

Post #: 7

RE: co-workers ~~ who know something - 8/25/2007 10:05:24 PM

sammy7626

Posts: 89
Joined: 8/20/2007
Status: offline

I was outed at my last job...of course that was years ago, and it had nothing to do with my Hubby either. I forget exactly what I said or did, but my boss (an older gentleman) looked at me and said "good girl", in that 'I could come over and pat you on the head' sort of tone. I must have turned about 80 shades of red, because one of my co-workers (a social worker) said, "well, that tells me an awful lot about you..."

oh well. I found it less than amusing at the time, but later it did provide some interesting fodder for conversation about exactly why sadism and massochism were still listed as mental defects in the DSM-IV.

(in reply to shyinini)

Post #: 8

RE: co-workers ~~ who know something - 8/25/2007 10:39:45 PM

BeatingsForAll

Posts: 1
Joined: 8/8/2007
Status: offline

I honestly feel fortunate that with my life I have nothing to hide. I do know when discretion is needed and warranted, but as for myself, I do not hide who I am nor anything that I do from anyone. My co-workers have found that if they don't really want to know, it is better not to ask... because I will tell them without the blink of an eye.

"So, what did you do this weekend?"
"Well, I got paid a bit on the side to beat the shit out of a few boys and a girl that wanted me to show them my 'inner sadist'. What did you do?
"Um... Never mind..."

LOL My mom is even my driver whenever my regular driver is unavailable!

LD

(in reply to shyinini)

Post #: 9

RE: co-workers ~~ who know something - 8/26/2007 4:38:30 AM

Drifa

Posts: 547
Joined: 7/27/2007
From: Rural Texas
Status: offline

I suspect that being lesbian precludes any additional probing into my kinks. I don't advertise but eventually a co-worker will ask me point blank and I'm always truthful. THEN the only questions you get are:

(1) Which one of you is the man? [ANS: Neither, and that's the point!]

(2) What, er, um, blush, do you guys actually DO?? [ANS: Anything anyone else does in bed, adjusting for the obvious physical difference and probably owning more interesting latex novelties.]

After those two, I never get more in-depth questions about my sex life. Unless I come in with an interesting bruise somewhere, which is VERY rare.

(in reply to shyinini)

Post #: 10

RE: co-workers ~~ who know something - 8/26/2007 5:12:28 AM

womanworshipper

Posts: 71
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline

i met Madam at work and Our/our relationship developed there. By the time i left, practically everyone "knew" that i was under Her control as We/we made no real secret of it - She would openly come up to me and give me work to do for Her or publically order me about or berate me.

i am now returning to work with Her again and the nature of Our/our relationship should be even more apparent as most people will be aware that She was the Prime Mover behind my application.

Fine. I'm not ashamed to be seen to be submissive to Her. No need to hide it, so long as it doesn't interfere with Our/our work.

(in reply to shyinini)

Post #: 11

RE: co-workers ~~ who know something - 8/26/2007 4:48:44 PM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

Well they know I am poly only because they are nosy enough to ask lots of personal inappropriate questions and I won't outright lie if someone's going to ask. In a professional small office environment, sadly you can't just point out people's rudeness, even in the normal ways by avoiding the questions.

They know that we have a dynamic in which we discuss things very thoroughly and that I do defer to him on some things.

But just because it's obviously that one person defers to another hardly means they know that the relationship is based on authority transfer. For a lot of people it really is just how they work together and it's nothing conscious at all.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to womanworshipper)

Post #: 12

RE: co-workers ~~ who know something - 8/26/2007 5:04:02 PM

kossack

Posts: 82
Joined: 8/5/2006
Status: offline

For me, I'd hate it if someone had an inkling at work. I have to command a large group of ever-changing people, a number of whom are men who sometimes challenge my authority. If one person ever knew, everyone would know--gossip is endemic. I do a number of things to hide my tracks because I really believe it would make me much less commanding and create very awkward situations.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 13

RE: co-workers ~~ who know something - 8/26/2007 7:55:16 PM

denika

Posts: 619
Joined: 8/30/2005
Status: offline

my work partner and I are shift workers, so that means long hours in a closed in enviroment, we even eat in the same room. We are permant partners so we spend almost more time together than we do with our spouces. She's an amazing girl, I have to give her all the credit in the world for coming from a very sheltered back ground then having to wrok with me *s* She takes me with a grain of non-judgmental salt. During down time we talk, and I don't hide much of our lifestyle. It's not for her but she understands it's a large part of my life, she has seen me laugh about it, even cry on an occasion or two and if anything I helped her see the positive side of both poly choices and BDSM.
If anything, now when she see's any bruises on me she doesn't think Rob is 'abusing' me. Instead she smiles and comments that 'somebody' had a good night.

denika

(in reply to shyinini)

Post #: 14

RE: co-workers ~~ who know something - 8/26/2007 9:37:49 PM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: kossack
For me, I'd hate it if someone had an inkling at work. I have to command a large group of ever-changing people, a number of whom are men who sometimes challenge my authority. If one person ever knew, everyone would know--gossip is endemic. I do a number of things to hide my tracks because I really believe it would make me much less commanding and create very awkward situations.

Trust me, I'm more than happy to keep work and personal life totally separate. Unfortunately when you're in a four person office, with two of them being a married couple with the boss and his wife as "office manager" who treat their office just as much as their home, a lot of the typical ways to deal with "inappropriate business" issues just fly out the window. So I toe the line as best I can.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to kossack)

Post #: 15

RE: co-workers ~~ who know something - 8/27/2007 6:57:48 AM

IvyMorgan

Posts: 729
Joined: 7/5/2007
From: Midlands, UK
Status: offline

Technically it depends which job I'm at whether people know. When I'm teaching, no-one knows. When doing bar work, it's kinda the point that they know, and if they didn't know at the start of the night, the point when I tie someone up and find the flogger usually makes it pretty clear... this would also mean that the people who work there know, and it's only the owner of the bar who seems at all freaked out by any of it.

I think that for the most part, there's not a great deal of need for ppl to know what's going on in my bedroom, or living room, or kitchen, or where-ever.

Some of my friends know, most of them don't. Some of my co-workers in places other than the bar know, most don't.

I'm now wondering how it would go down, being open about me, whilst supporting young people who've experienced SA/regular abuse. Best not ask, I think.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 16

RE: co-workers ~~ who know something - 8/27/2007 7:10:10 AM

WinsomeDefiance

Posts: 6719
Joined: 8/7/2007
Status: offline

I worked in a large refinery where they had random searches of the vehicles entering and leaving. One time, when I was leaving for the day I was chosen for a random search. I just happened to have a toy bag full of all sorts of extremely embarassing items in the trunk of my car. When the guards opened the bag and started removing the items - all the while my co-workers are leaving for the day as well and driving by to see this - I have to say I felt myself pretty well 'outed' at work. All I could say to the guard was, "All non-Exxon issue."

A week later my boss peeks in my office and gushed all in a single breath, "If you know someone who wants a boy toy let me know." then he ran out and shut the door behind him. That was worth the embarassment of having leather floggers, boots, toys and lingerie strung out all over the place while slack jawed wide-eyed guards rummaged through my things.

(in reply to IvyMorgan)

Post #: 17

RE: co-workers ~~ who know something - 8/27/2007 7:15:13 AM

WinsomeDefiance

Posts: 6719
Joined: 8/7/2007
Status: offline

As bad as it is to be 'outed' at work, and as embarassing as my prior accounting was, it wasn't near as humiliatiing as walking out my front door to see my two young sons in our front yard using my vibrators as Light Sabers.

(in reply to WinsomeDefiance)

Post #: 18

RE: co-workers ~~ who know something - 8/27/2007 7:50:53 AM

GhitaAmati

Posts: 3263
Joined: 5/30/2007
Status: offline

We are fairly lucky, Sir and I met at a previous job, and everyone there pretty much already knew me well enough to know what kind of a relationship it must be. Id worked there since I was 15, been hanging out there since I was two.....

Now I stay at home, and the place Sir works, the entire company are swingers....sometimes it actually hurts us more than helps us, Sir doesnt get the best jobs and the most money because I refuse to fuck his boss (fat and annoying and smells bad)...but the other guy who compeates for the same jobs as Sir, his girlfriend fucks the boss all the time...so he gets the better work.....

_____________________________

I said I was a submissive, I never said I was a GOOD submissive.

Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its pretty damn good.
~Woody Allen

(in reply to WinsomeDefiance)

Post #: 19

RE: co-workers ~~ who know something - 8/27/2007 7:57:15 AM

destined2serve1

Posts: 18
Joined: 7/25/2007
Status: offline

My boss has been in the lifestyle for years and knew my husband before i did... In fact my boss is why we met... So no secrets between us. Overall it has not been too awkward... We occasionally see one another outside of work but pretty much go our own ways.

(in reply to GhitaAmati)

Post #: 20

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