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Mentorship - 8/26/2007 4:43:27 AM

MasterMagnus321

Posts: 86
Joined: 10/4/2005
Status: offline

Recently, in the General Messages, there was a post asking: do dommes sometimes do sessions with subs just to train other dommes? I am in search of another Dom Mentor- there isn't a BDSM community where I live, and I'm not presently able to travel to play parties or events where I could learn- so I am in search of a Dom willing to share experiences and act as a guiding mentor for me. Any help is greatly appreciated.

_____________________________

Nothing lasts, and yet nothing passes, either.
And nothing passes just because nothing lasts.
-Philip Roth

~MASTERMAGNUS

Post #: 1

RE: Mentorship - 8/26/2007 7:19:11 AM

SimplyMichael

Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline

There are people here I run things by despite being in an active bdsm community, take advantage of that. Email someone you respect and see if they are willing to provide advice.

(in reply to MasterMagnus321)

Post #: 2

RE: Mentorship - 8/26/2007 10:10:05 AM

celticlord2112

Posts: 5732
Status: offline

Basically, what SimplyMichael said....

Browse the archives of the message boards, and read what various folk have to say. The people whose ideas and comments resonate with you, get to know them.

I read the boards all the time, both to look for new ideas and also to clarify thoughts within my own mind. My experience has been that, even when I disagree with the ideas expressed, there are lessons to be learned in the reading.

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(in reply to MasterMagnus321)

Post #: 3

RE: Mentorship - 8/26/2007 1:35:36 PM

MstrSkyWoIf

Posts: 238
Joined: 10/26/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterMagnus321

Recently, in the General Messages, there was a post asking: do dommes sometimes do sessions with subs just to train other dommes? I am in search of another Dom Mentor- there isn't a BDSM community where I live, and I'm not presently able to travel to play parties or events where I could learn- so I am in search of a Dom willing to share experiences and act as a guiding mentor for me. Any help is greatly appreciated.

There is never a lack of advice being given on the message boards. I would caution you to be careful who you take advice from. It has been my experience the ones most willing to help here are often but not always the ones with the least amount of experience and the most time on there hands. There are many useful books and websites available with information on the responsibilities of a true Master to his sub. The fact you are asking questions shows you do not take your responsibility lightly. This is a good foundation to build on and I commend you for it. Much of Being A Master depends on personality and the ability to stay level headed. Remember honor, integrity, and taking responsibility for your own actions will take you a long way.

(in reply to celticlord2112)

Post #: 4

RE: Mentorship - 8/26/2007 1:43:21 PM

Guilty1974

Posts: 467
Joined: 11/2/2005
From: Den Haag
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MstrSkyWoIf

There is never a lack of advice being given on the message boards. I would caution you to be careful who you take advice from. It has been my experience the ones most willing to help here are often but not always the ones with the least amount of experience and the most time on there hands. There are many useful books and websites available with information on the responsibilities of a true Master to his sub.

Actually, for websites the same holds for advice on the boards. Those who make websites are not always the most knowlegable people out there, and there's a lot of crap on the net. I'd recommend never to trust one single source, whether the source is a local Dom, an advice on a board or a book or website. And besides, true experts never stop learning, so no book or website is ever finished.

(in reply to MstrSkyWoIf)

Post #: 5

RE: Mentorship - 8/26/2007 4:54:32 PM

MstrSkyWoIf

Posts: 238
Joined: 10/26/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Guilty1974

quote:

ORIGINAL: MstrSkyWoIf

There is never a lack of advice being given on the message boards. I would caution you to be careful who you take advice from. It has been my experience the ones most willing to help here are often but not always the ones with the least amount of experience and the most time on there hands. There are many useful books and websites available with information on the responsibilities of a true Master to his sub.

Actually, for websites the same holds for advice on the boards. Those who make websites are not always the most knowlegable people out there, and there's a lot of crap on the net. I'd recommend never to trust one single source, whether the source is a local Dom, an advice on a board or a book or website. And besides, true experts never stop learning, so no book or website is ever finished.

I would agree, in fact I think one sign of a true Master is someone how admits openly they do not know everything and they are always learning open to new ideas and input.

(in reply to Guilty1974)

Post #: 6

RE: Mentorship - 8/26/2007 9:20:03 PM

SimplyMichael

Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline

no fucking such thing as a "true" master

(in reply to MstrSkyWoIf)

Post #: 7

RE: Mentorship - 8/26/2007 9:21:00 PM

valkyriesdaughte

Posts: 38
Joined: 6/10/2007
Status: offline

The Loving Dominant

Screw the roses, Send me the Thorns

Pick up a copy of each, well worth the read.

(in reply to MstrSkyWoIf)

Post #: 8

RE: Mentorship - 8/26/2007 9:58:30 PM

MasterFireMaam

Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline

Post, read, pay attention. Find the things that resonate with you and develop your own style. Get to know some people who you like or at least respect and start up a conversation. Ask around about these people, if you want...most of us who have been here for a while know the others who have been here a while.

Oh, books are a good resource, especially for the more abstract things like relationship dynamics. Check out the two lists in my signature.

Master Fire

< Message edited by MasterFireMaam -- 8/26/2007 9:59:17 PM >

_____________________________

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(in reply to MasterMagnus321)

Post #: 9

RE: Mentorship - 8/26/2007 10:09:31 PM

feastie

Posts: 1793
Joined: 6/4/2004
Status: offline

Immerse yourself in educational materials. Read everything, but hold the idea that nothing is a bible. Subscribe, at the very least, to Jack Rinella's column, Leatherviews at www.leatherviews.com. Is Erie to far for you to travel? There's a group there: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/eriepowerexchange/. You can subscribe to the group, even if you can't as yet travel there.

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Snarky and loving it.

Disclaimer: Any views expressed in any post are my opinions only. They may or may not be yours.

(in reply to MstrSkyWoIf)

Post #: 10

RE: Mentorship - 8/26/2007 10:31:21 PM

BossyShoeBitch

Posts: 3931
Joined: 1/13/2007
From: South Florida
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

no fucking such thing as a "true" master

Oh but if I may respectfully beg to differ Master?

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A clever man can get out of situations a wise man never gets into...
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

(in reply to SimplyMichael)

Post #: 11

RE: Mentorship - 8/27/2007 12:22:19 AM

celticlord2112

Posts: 5732
Status: offline

What about a "twue" Master?

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(in reply to SimplyMichael)

Post #: 12

RE: Mentorship - 8/27/2007 7:24:22 AM

SimplyMichael

Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline

I know you meant that in the most respectful and flirtatious of ways and while I appreciate the compliment, I might be the right master for you but I would NEVER call myself true.

In fact, the minute I hear someone tack true into anything they say and or write, I instantly dismiss them as internet players and or idiots.

(in reply to BossyShoeBitch)

Post #: 13

RE: Mentorship - 8/27/2007 7:27:21 AM

DarkDaddyZ

Posts: 805
Joined: 4/7/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

I know you meant that in the most respectful and flirtatious of ways and while I appreciate the compliment, I might be the right master for you but I would NEVER call myself true.

In fact, the minute I hear someone tack true into anything they say and or write, I instantly dismiss them as internet players and or idiots.

Hear hear! The only time I want to hear the term True is when Spandau Ballet sings it.

_____________________________

"Flirting is part of the job description." DJ Jesus (Lucy Daughter Of The Devil)

Vanilla Official Music Page http://www.myspace.com/djzulu

(in reply to SimplyMichael)

Post #: 14

RE: Mentorship - 8/27/2007 1:27:54 PM

Vigilantejustice

Posts: 106
Joined: 11/15/2004
Status: offline

The reality of the concepts of "True" Dominance or Submission is that they are very multifaceted. There is no One True Way for either. I've known men that were wonderful Masters to the (usually) women under their power, but they didn't have what I needed to be able to feel (what for me is) truly submissive. I know that 99% of the Dominants out there would hardly consider me submissive under most circumstances, but as the few who really clicked with me can attest, that part of me can truly blossom under the right hands. I'm sure it's similar for Dominants as well, that they're nature is best shown when their partner is right for them. Any idiot can wield a paddle and probably not kill anyone. Any girl can have her ass slapped by a guy. It's the dynamic between (insert number) people that makes for Trueness.

Just my 2p,
Justice

(in reply to SimplyMichael)

Post #: 15

RE: Mentorship - 8/27/2007 1:38:27 PM

Rover

Posts: 2634
Joined: 6/28/2004
Status: offline

You're not unreasonably distant from Erie, Buffalo or Pittsburgh. Each of which has an active scene. And one night a month to attend something real time isn't an unrealistic expectation. In fact, if that's too much effort I'd question the value of spending any time at all lending a helping hand.

John

P.S. - If you're interested in the Pittsburgh scene, you might consider visiting www.pittsburghleather.org for some information (though portions of our website are currently under re-construction). Come to a local munch or workshop and I'll make sure you feel welcome.

< Message edited by Rover -- 8/27/2007 1:42:49 PM >

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"Man's mind stretched to a new idea never goes back to its original dimensions."

Sri da Avabhas

(in reply to MasterMagnus321)

Post #: 16

RE: Mentorship - 8/27/2007 3:51:22 PM

MadRabbit

Posts: 3460
Joined: 8/9/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

I know you meant that in the most respectful and flirtatious of ways and while I appreciate the compliment, I might be the right master for you but I would NEVER call myself true.

In fact, the minute I hear someone tack true into anything they say and or write, I instantly dismiss them as internet players and or idiots.

How true

_____________________________

Advice for New Dominants
The Unpolitically Correct Lifestyle Definitions

Obama is NOT the Messiah! He's just a VERY NAUGHTY BOY

(in reply to SimplyMichael)

Post #: 17

RE: Mentorship - 8/27/2007 3:58:30 PM

MadRabbit

Posts: 3460
Joined: 8/9/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Rover

You're not unreasonably distant from Erie, Buffalo or Pittsburgh. Each of which has an active scene. And one night a month to attend something real time isn't an unrealistic expectation. In fact, if that's too much effort I'd question the value of spending any time at all lending a helping hand.

John

P.S. - If you're interested in the Pittsburgh scene, you might consider visiting www.pittsburghleather.org for some information (though portions of our website are currently under re-construction). Come to a local munch or workshop and I'll make sure you feel welcome.

I agree. Thats basically what I do. I try to travel to Columbia to see my mentor/friends at least once a month now that I have time and resources to spend and have decided to give another go at being a Top.

Learning S/M is not a four year program in college. Theres only so much you can take away from an instructinal before the rest is simply experience with having fun and playing.

_____________________________

Advice for New Dominants
The Unpolitically Correct Lifestyle Definitions

Obama is NOT the Messiah! He's just a VERY NAUGHTY BOY

(in reply to Rover)

Post #: 18

RE: Mentorship - 8/27/2007 4:16:26 PM

YesMistressIrish

Posts: 1135
Joined: 5/1/2007
From: Calif
Status: offline

Mad Rabbit wrote :
'Learning S/M is not a four year program in college. Theres only so much you can take away from an instructinal before the rest is simply experience with having fun and playing.'
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So True.

< Message edited by YesMistressIrish -- 8/27/2007 4:19:50 PM >

(in reply to MadRabbit)

Post #: 19

RE: Mentorship - 8/27/2007 4:27:50 PM

mmb1

Posts: 304
Joined: 8/3/2007
Status: offline

Wait, you want another Dom to Mentor you???

(in reply to YesMistressIrish)

Post #: 20

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