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Ending non-consensually exhibitionistic, incestuous gay... - 8/30/2007 3:16:47 PM   
petdave


Posts: 2479
Status: offline 		Okay, y'all are my go-to reference for all that is sexually deviant (lucky bastards!), so i ask:

How do i get it through my cats fuzzy little heads that they're both NEUTERED and they need to stop HUMPING in the middle of the LIVING ROOM when i'm trying to enjoy a quiet dinner???

More importantly, what form do i need to fill out to get federal funding for this before the next elections?

i just KNOW there are tax dollars out there earmarked for addressing this sort of problem, and i WANT IN.

Thanks in advance,

...dave
(and yes, i've already tried squirting them with a water pistol. But an computer-controlled automatic system is just a few million dollars away, and i think it'll be a big help...)
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Ending non-consensually exhibitionistic, incestuous... - 8/30/2007 3:23:04 PM   
spiral23


Posts: 1053
Joined: 1/10/2007
Status: offline 		give em their own kitty dungeon to play in....

(in reply to petdave)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Ending non-consensually exhibitionistic, incestuous... - 8/30/2007 3:26:10 PM   
Carrianna


Posts: 273
Joined: 11/20/2006
Status: offline 		LOL, I have two toms and one is such a bully, they even put on an event for the neighbours!!!  Neutered, yes they are!

_____________________________

Selfishness must always be forgiven you know, because there is no hope of a cure. "Mansfield Park" J.Austen

(in reply to spiral23)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Ending non-consensually exhibitionistic, incestuous... - 8/30/2007 3:26:20 PM   
kayne


Posts: 417
Joined: 8/22/2007
Status: offline 		At least it's not an interspecies sex act. My cat Hotlips is a girl, but she consistently tries to hump my duck.

_____________________________

Baby whatcha say we go pickin' wildflowers?
Got a spot way back in the woods.
Sneak away for a couple of hours,
You and me baby, pickin' wildflowers.

(in reply to spiral23)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Ending non-consensually exhibitionistic, incestuous... - 8/30/2007 3:37:46 PM   
Carrianna


Posts: 273
Joined: 11/20/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: kayne

At least it's not an interspecies sex act. My cat Hotlips is a girl, but she consistently tries to hump my duck.


LOL There is an animal zoo in Amsterdam that only has animals with those tendencies, I could be mistaken.  Was something I heard years ago.  They where trying to prove that sexuality is not just about the human race!!  Again, I am not 100% sure, I have no proof...  Just word of mouth...

_____________________________

Selfishness must always be forgiven you know, because there is no hope of a cure. "Mansfield Park" J.Austen

(in reply to kayne)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Ending non-consensually exhibitionistic, incestuous... - 8/30/2007 4:49:06 PM   
petdave


Posts: 2479
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: kayne

At least it's not an interspecies sex act. My cat Hotlips is a girl, but she consistently tries to hump my duck.


Dude, i hate to have to tell you this, but everyone knows your duck is a slut. Better make sure Hotlips is using protection

(in reply to kayne)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Ending non-consensually exhibitionistic, incestuous... - 8/30/2007 5:49:32 PM   
kayne


Posts: 417
Joined: 8/22/2007
Status: offline 		GASP! Radar is not a slut!

Oh who am I kidding, he is.....

_____________________________

Baby whatcha say we go pickin' wildflowers?
Got a spot way back in the woods.
Sneak away for a couple of hours,
You and me baby, pickin' wildflowers.

(in reply to petdave)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Ending non-consensually exhibitionistic, incestuous... - 8/30/2007 8:52:09 PM   
e01n


Posts: 1472
Status: offline 		Practical solution: fresh catnip/catmint. Tends to cut down on that sort of thing when they're stoned out of their gourds...

Silly solution: http://www.rathergood.com/gaybar/

(in reply to kayne)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Ending non-consensually exhibitionistic, incestuous... - 8/30/2007 8:56:23 PM   
slavegirljoy


Posts: 1207
Joined: 11/6/2006
From: North Carolina, USA
Status: offline 		That is such a cute idea!  And, i think i would even be willing to pay to watch (a kitty dungeon cam....mmmmm.....i like the sound of that.)
 
slave joy
Owned property of Master David
___________________________________
"Commitment transforms a promise into a reality."

quote:

ORIGINAL: spiral23

give em their own kitty dungeon to play in....

(in reply to spiral23)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Ending non-consensually exhibitionistic, incestuous... - 8/30/2007 9:09:54 PM   
MissMagnolia


Posts: 3636
Status: offline 		Dave, for information on government funding of  the dehorning of horny cats, I refer you to blue Form B22/6, page 904, paragraph 473C/D. Lodge the form in the nearest waste paper basket (which saves us a job later). In the event of blue Form B22/6 being unavailable, please refer to the Pussy Galore Handbook (available from our office which is open at convenient times for you, if the hours of 9.00am-9.06am, Tuedays and Fridays, excluding public holidays, are convenient for you.) and use the red Form 530Z, which is conveniently located somewhere in the book. In the event red Form 530Z has been removed from the book, please return it to our office, and we will photocopy the form we could have given to you in the first place.

_____________________________

if at first you dont succeed..then skydiving isnt for you

Resident Whip Cracker AND Resident Orbs Of Joy.


(in reply to slavegirljoy)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Ending non-consensually exhibitionistic, incestuous... - 8/30/2007 9:27:16 PM   
HydroMaster


Posts: 4786
Joined: 9/24/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Carrianna

quote:

ORIGINAL: kayne

At least it's not an interspecies sex act. My cat Hotlips is a girl, but she consistently tries to hump my duck.


LOL There is an animal zoo in Amsterdam that only has animals with those tendencies, I could be mistaken.  Was something I heard years ago.  They where trying to prove that sexuality is not just about the human race!!  Again, I am not 100% sure, I have no proof...  Just word of mouth...


In Amsterdam....of course it is.  Where else would they put it?


_____________________________

I walk the lonely road,
the only one that I have ever known.

(in reply to Carrianna)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Ending non-consensually exhibitionistic, incestuous... - 8/31/2007 5:12:52 AM   
petdave


Posts: 2479
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MissMagnolia
In the event of blue Form B22/6 being unavailable, please refer to the Pussy Galore Handbook


The last time i tried to look something up the pages were all stuck together

(in reply to MissMagnolia)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Ending non-consensually exhibitionistic, incestuous... - 8/31/2007 6:21:55 AM   
sub4hire


Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		Stop humping in front of them.  I read in a cat book recently that as adults they are the mentality of toddlers.
So, they are repeating what you do.  Stop teaching them.

(in reply to petdave)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Ending non-consensually exhibitionistic, incestuous... - 8/31/2007 6:22:49 AM   
GhitaAmati


Posts: 3263
Joined: 5/30/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: slavegirljoy

That is such a cute idea!  And, i think i would even be willing to pay to watch (a kitty dungeon cam....mmmmm.....i like the sound of that.)
 
slave joy
Owned property of Master David
___________________________________
"Commitment transforms a promise into a reality."

quote:

ORIGINAL: spiral23

give em their own kitty dungeon to play in....



You could try this....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SkAM_31SU0U

_____________________________

I said I was a submissive, I never said I was a GOOD submissive.


Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its pretty damn good.
~Woody Allen

(in reply to slavegirljoy)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Ending non-consensually exhibitionistic, incestuous... - 8/31/2007 9:36:07 AM   
LivingInSin


Posts: 326
Joined: 6/12/2007
Status: offline 		that was funny ghita! i do that to my 5 year old twins....they call is a "wa saudge"

_____________________________

*Instead of complaining that rose bushes have thorns, rejoice that thorn bushes bloom*

*Myth says that only the woman who has been an utter slave can be truly free------this is no myth*


(in reply to GhitaAmati)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Ending non-consensually exhibitionistic, incestuous... - 8/31/2007 2:35:50 PM   
slavegirljoy


Posts: 1207
Joined: 11/6/2006
From: North Carolina, USA
Status: offline 		Thank you, GhitaAmati, for that link.  That was nice of you to post that.  It made me smile when i saw the kitty getting paddled and enjoying it so much.  That makes me want to see a "kitty dungeon cam", even more now.  i think furry BDSM is pretty kinky, so long as no animals are actually hurt in the process.
 
slave joy
Owned property of Master David
_________________________________________
"Commitment transforms a promise into a reality."

quote:

ORIGINAL: GhitaAmati

quote:

ORIGINAL: slavegirljoy

That is such a cute idea!  And, i think i would even be willing to pay to watch (a kitty dungeon cam....mmmmm.....i like the sound of that.)
 
slave joy
Owned property of Master David
___________________________________
"Commitment transforms a promise into a reality."

quote:

ORIGINAL: spiral23

give em their own kitty dungeon to play in....



You could try this....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SkAM_31SU0U

(in reply to GhitaAmati)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Ending non-consensually exhibitionistic, incestuous... - 8/31/2007 5:28:43 PM   
MissMagnolia


Posts: 3636
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: petdave

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissMagnolia
In the event of blue Form B22/6 being unavailable, please refer to the Pussy Galore Handbook


The last time i tried to look something up the pages were all stuck together



Oh good grief. This is the very reason we poor government employee's are so overworked. People like you who need your hand held to fill in a simple form or five.
Please come to my office on December 24th at 4.59pm and I will photocopy the form you need. The office closes at 5.00pm, so don't be late. If you are not on time, please note this office will be closed until February 26th, due to the tax payer funded cruise we will be on.
Ms. M. Shnuggunhal (Employee of the Month for Excellence in Customer Care)

_____________________________

if at first you dont succeed..then skydiving isnt for you

Resident Whip Cracker AND Resident Orbs Of Joy.


(in reply to petdave)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Ending non-consensually exhibitionistic, incestuous... - 8/31/2007 8:40:24 PM   
nyrisa


Posts: 1830
Joined: 11/20/2006
Status: offline 		Put both the little dears on an anti depressant. It seems to work wonders for decreasing the sex drive to zero.

However, are you sure the problem is not merely that you are jealous that they are getting more action in your living room than you are? Stop being so selfish! Be a good friend, and have cool water and fresh towels ready for when they wish to take a break.

_____________________________

A true lady takes off her dignity with her clothes and does her whorish best. At other times you can be as modest and dignified as your persona requires. Robert Heinlein

The last thing I want to do is hurt you...but it is still on my list.

(in reply to petdave)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Ending non-consensually exhibitionistic, incestuous... - 9/1/2007 8:16:37 AM   
petdave


Posts: 2479
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: nyrisa

Put both the little dears on an anti depressant. It seems to work wonders for decreasing the sex drive to zero.


i think mine must be broken... i'm high as a kite and i've still got a hankerin' for a little somethin-somethin

quote:


However, are you sure the problem is not merely that you are jealous that they are getting more action in your living room than you are? Stop being so selfish! Be a good friend, and have cool water and fresh towels ready for when they wish to take a break.


Okay, if it gets to the point where they need towels, those little bastards are getting locked in the bathroom! i don't think my "Pet Odor and Stain Remover" is rated for this.

(in reply to nyrisa)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Ending non-consensually exhibitionistic, incestuous... - 9/1/2007 10:40:35 AM   
nyrisa


Posts: 1830
Joined: 11/20/2006
Status: offline 		Take the can of spray up to the store clerk. Ask him/her if this will remove dog semen from furniture and clothes. Videotape the reaction you get. Post the link to the video here. **goes to get some popcorn to watch THIS video!**

_____________________________

A true lady takes off her dignity with her clothes and does her whorish best. At other times you can be as modest and dignified as your persona requires. Robert Heinlein

The last thing I want to do is hurt you...but it is still on my list.

(in reply to petdave)
Profile   Post #: 20
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