RE: tricky question :) (Full Version)

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burningdesires47 -> RE: tricky question :) (9/3/2007 11:59:35 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: bandit25

Swear to God...sometimes I think I'm half a step behind everyone else. What the hell does "when she doesn't answer back as I wish" mean? If you have a script, then give it to her and she'll answer just as you wish. If she's screwing something up..how about telling her? How hard is that? Good Lord..this isn't rocket science.


If you have given her a script and she doesn't follow it, you can only remind someone so many times before further corrective action is needed. Also, many times it's not the words, it's the tone that needs corrective action. And again, no amount of talking can fix that, sometimes.




burningdesires47 -> RE: tricky question :) (9/3/2007 12:07:27 PM)

I would have to concur with the suggestions about removing privileges over some of the other suggestions (i.e. mental versus physical discomfort). But then, I have sensation issues to begin with, and the "itchy clothes" suggestion or the "remove comfortable seating" suggestion is more like to make me unable to comply. Sure I'll sit on the floor, but you're taking me to the chiropractor. Sure, I'll wear itchy clothes, but you're staying up with me when I can't sleep for the next 3 days. Anything that effects my health in a negative way is pretty much out, and some aspects of humiliation are hard limits for me too... which leaves being ignored as the best punishment.

I gotta say though, the silent treatment only works if the sub knows why they're getting it. If I'm being ignored for some unknown reason, it's more like to make me angry and confrontational than contrite and eager to please. So my point is, I'm encouraging communication with the "punishment."




slaveish -> RE: tricky question :) (9/4/2007 2:33:34 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: feastie

Yeah, but punishment can be fun (as long as it isn't administered by an idiot) and can make for laughs later. And since the girl is new, innocuous non-scary / non-dramatic punishment can get her in a submissive head.




I stand by the statement. Corrective action does not have to be intolerable to be effective.




angelicsubbie -> RE: tricky question :) (9/7/2007 10:56:48 PM)

i will yet again respond with how is she not answering as you wish?  If you message me i may have ideas...simply because i often do the same.  Generally, with me, it is for a few reasons...

1)   i am unsure of what is expected of me...i know that there is THE right answer to the question, i'm just unsure of it...and i falter, though i'm getting better at saying that i don't know what someone wants me to say

2)  i am shy.  Especially when it comes to play-related conversation, or when i am upset, i am incredibly quiet and shy.  Often it is not simply a matter of disobeying, or choosing not to answer, i honestly cannot form the words and get them out of my mouth.  This is generally when i turn red and try to hide my face, often (moreso if it has to do with something sexual than something that upsets me) if someone grabs me by the hair and forces me to look at them then i answer, if for nothing else than so that i can hide again.

3)  i know my answer will not please someone.  If you ask me if i enjoy what i know you enjoy, and you hope i enjoy, i'm hesitant to answer; i don't want to dissapoint....

If it is forgetting to say sir, i am working on that...and sometimes struggle to determine when it is necessary.  On the other hand, i feel that if i *always* say it, it kind of looses its meaning, and will become rote; which i guess is kind of the desired effect?  But i don't want to rotely say something, i want to say it because i mean it...i understand some view my not always saying it as a sign of disrespect, but that is by no means how it is intended.




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