ADomDoc -> RE: How to tell a true Master? (9/6/2007 7:04:32 PM)
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ORIGINAL: ExquisiteFeline i realize all ppl are different, and each Dom has their own personality but... What are the immediate indications that one would be communicating with a true Dom? What is the definitive nature of a Dom? Anyone who calls him/herself a "Master" ... which is tantamount to claiming mastery over all knowledge of BdSm ... is blowing smoke up your ass non-consensually. A true Master knows s/he doesn't know everything and is willing to learn from anyone. A true Master has humility in his/her mastery. "Master" is a title of respect given by those who study under him/her ... who respect his/her skill, ability and extensive command of the subject. quote:
Does a Dom ever have trouble communicating their truth? If a sub asks a direct question should they expect a direct answer? Everyone has trouble communicating ... truth, feelings, where it hurts when the Dr asks, why they did such a stupid thing yesterday. Everyone should expect a direct answer to a direct question EXCEPT, I would rather have the honest answer of "I don't want to answer/talk about that right now." rather than have someone evade an answer. And, I think it is perfectly acceptable to withhold some information at different stages of knowing someone. You certainly won't give up your phone#, address, SSN, place of business, license#, or bank account information to someone you just met -- BUT your husband/wife needs to know that information. Why would you give up such important info to someone online who you've never met? Who you might never meet? Who might turn out to be a major wierdo when you do meet them? There's nothing wrong with keeping a bit of insulation between yourself & someone who might do you harm if they had enough information about you. And, don't think that it hasn't, or couldn't happen. It's fine (& prudent) to answer direct questions that pertain to the relationship, mutual interests, limits, squicks, allergies, medical conditions that might affect the relationship or future play, # of kids, that your dog farts during meals ... just be careful about giving a stranger information that s/he could turn around & damage you if s/he had it AND proves upon meeting to be a whack job. And, if s/he gets pissed & goes away, give thanks that you dodged another bullet.
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