Cuck, Partnering and Safer Sex Practices (Full Version)

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iammachine -> Cuck, Partnering and Safer Sex Practices (9/3/2007 11:13:35 PM)

Let me preface my post with a statement that I am neutral to somewhat sympathetic about cuckold fetish (I'm neither turned off nor particularly turned on by it, as I have no personal experience). I am not trying to make sweeping generalizations or pigeon hole anyone that is interested in or practices this flavor of kink. I am, however, curious about how certain aspects are handled amongst those that choose to engage in those particular activities.

Disclaimer aside, what inspired this post was an email that I had recently received on the other side. I was approached by a very enthusiastic cuck fetishist (hereforth referred to as "enthusiastic cucky dude"). He described to me in a good amount of detail his fantasy and some of the activities he would enjoy (in the first email even! That's definitely enthusiasm!). A couple of the things that he described, and are what kind of sparked some questions for me, is a desire to want to "clean" a woman after she had had sex with a bull (I hope I have my terms correct!). Specifically, he mentioned wanting to clean the cum from her. This isn't the first time I have had someone approach me about that activity specifically (I quietly declined, feeling a little bit like a horse being shoved around by a cart).

Me being me, of course, my first thoughts are about rather important incidentals: like the plethora of concerns that enter into the picture when fluid bonding is involved, which I would like to ask to the community at large. To those (top, bottom or topping from the bottom) that enjoy this kink in practice, or fantasize about practicing it, if "cleaning" a woman as described above is included in your fetish, how important is it to you? How do you go about this? What precautions do you take? Is that more a fantasy aspect that is infrequently if ever engaged, or is it a more integral part of your active fantasy? Given the above, do you play with specific bulls that are fluid bonded exclusively, and/or how do you handle additions?

Enthusiastic cucky dude had also made mention of enjoying taking an active role in finding partners for a Domme. This of course, brings up a whole new set of questions which I had noticed being asked in another thread some time ago; like his desires vs her wants/needs, practicality issues, exactly who is directing the fantasy, health concerns, what if who he finds isn't suitable to her et cetera.  I am asking this as it applies to you, or your fantasy if it is not something you have practiced actively.

In seeking out partners in general, who (in your dynamic) has a more active role int it? What are the concerns that you take into consideration to meet your needs (this obviously is in regards to both ends of the D/s spectrum)?

Thanks for your input!



WildeDanny -> RE: Cuck, Partnering and Safer Sex Practices (9/5/2007 2:47:56 AM)

This is a scenario that seems to encourage subbing from the top. Granted, there are many legitimate cuckold couples, where the cuckolded party has little to nothing to say about it (and wouldn't have it any other way), but generally it is (supposed to be) an equal arrangement within the couple. It is more polyamory than anything else, though it does have some D/s aspects to it.
Whenever I engage in this practice with My slave (Yes, it is usually the male who is cuckolded, but I reverse it to suit My situation) I take all safe sex precautions. Limits are laid out beforehand with my prospective partner (how far she may go so far as abusing My slave, and so on). This is not a practice I regularly engage in, but as you have had no other answer, I felt the benefit of My limited experience may be worthwhile.



Cuckme4Life -> RE: Cuck, Partnering and Safer Sex Practices (9/5/2007 3:26:17 AM)

OH WOW my favorite subject.

Cuckolding does seem to fit into a role of topping from the bottom, But if done correctly, it can work as long as SHE stays in total control at all times. The point might be to cuckold a gent against his will.  Then there leaves no doubt who is in charge.

My personal choice in my endeavor is to be cucked against my will.. I want it to happen but I also do not.  Wishing to find myself in such situation that catches me offguard and forced to comply. 

As for the question. A true cuckolded experience must have HER choosing partners. IF it happens the other way around then in my opinion that is much closer to a swinging kink and having that hot wife thing going.  Not that I am an expert or anything, all I can offer is a personal opinion.



RRafe -> RE: Cuck, Partnering and Safer Sex Practices (9/5/2007 7:30:41 AM)

There are a lot of really nasty strains of std's out there.

And a test is only as good as the moment the blood was drawn-it can be completely invalidated by a careless sex act done long before the paperwork showing you are "clean" is even printed out.......



e01n -> RE: Cuck, Partnering and Safer Sex Practices (9/5/2007 1:10:54 PM)

I keep coming back to the request for "cleaning"...

I'll admit: in this age of having to wrap everything and autoclave it if possible, the idea of fluids meeting and mingling has some appeal from a certain fantasy level. And the felching afterwards is only natural... much like swallowing after a blowjob. It just makes sense...

But only within the confined logic of the fantasy.

Then again, that's just me. I'm stuck seeing what the appeal of doing the aforementioned with a semi-random stranger... anyone have any input on that?



iammachine -> RE: Cuck, Partnering and Safer Sex Practices (9/5/2007 1:17:31 PM)

Thanks muchly for your input, I was starting to worry that my thread was going to fall into the nether unanswered! 



iammachine -> RE: Cuck, Partnering and Safer Sex Practices (9/5/2007 1:20:13 PM)

quote:

Not that I am an expert or anything, all I can offer is a personal opinion.


And thank you for that opinion!



iammachine -> RE: Cuck, Partnering and Safer Sex Practices (9/5/2007 1:23:36 PM)

quote:

Then again, that's just me. I'm stuck seeing what the appeal of doing the aforementioned with a semi-random stranger... anyone have any input on that?
quote:

ORIGINAL: e01n

I keep coming back to the request for "cleaning"...

I'll admit: in this age of having to wrap everything and autoclave it if possible, the idea of fluids meeting and mingling has some appeal from a certain fantasy level. And the felching afterwards is only natural... much like swallowing after a blowjob. It just makes sense...

But only within the confined logic of the fantasy.

Then again, that's just me. I'm stuck seeing what the appeal of doing the aforementioned with a semi-random stranger... anyone have any input on that?


You're my hero. :)



iammachine -> RE: Cuck, Partnering and Safer Sex Practices (9/5/2007 1:26:23 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: RRafe

There are a lot of really nasty strains of std's out there.

And a test is only as good as the moment the blood was drawn-it can be completely invalidated by a careless sex act done long before the paperwork showing you are "clean" is even printed out.......


That's really kind of what inspired me to post. It's a request that I've received a lot, indirectly. Or rather, a fantasy that has been shared with me enough for me to take notice, and wonder.

I guess I'm just kind of curious about the overall thought process of those that have this kind of fantasy.



Stephann -> RE: Cuck, Partnering and Safer Sex Practices (9/5/2007 3:47:26 PM)

Hi machine,

Fluid Bonding, STDs, and the other risks associated with sex have been addressed numerous times in other threads.  In short, statistically, it's more dangerous to drive to the hotel to have sex with a stranger, than actually having unprotected sex with a stranger.  I think it's excellent that we have the means to sterilize everything; but I am saddened that we feel the need to buy bottled water, because we're 'told' that tap water isn't safe.  Who do you think benefits from a dollar spent on a 20 oz bottle of water?

/end rant

I dig the cuck fantasy, as a bull.  Having said that, there was an excellent thread on this subject here.  I think different cucks are motivated by different things; many different elements come together in it.  Objectification, humiliation, seeing their partner enjoying themselves, voyeurism, not least of which 'submitting' to her will.  I agree, there can be a great deal of 'topping from the bottom.'  In the other thread, many refer to cucks as 'one trick ponies'; but what I think is hard for them, is that the relationship is (usually) based on a viscious circle.  The cuck wants to feel humiliated, and hurt in one of the most intimate ways a person can be hurt.  It's the horror of coming home to finding the wife you love and devote your life to fucking the shit out of some brute.  She turns and laughs at him, saying she doesn't care about her husband, and never did.  It's The Ultimate Betrayal.  The man, shattered, either chooses to walk away, leaving the broken remnents of his heart on the ground, or drop to his knees and accept that he'll never be the man she loves.

What the cuck in an 'arranged' situation like this doesn't get, is that none of this is usually particularly romantic to the woman in question.  Why would a woman keep a man, who doesn't satisfy her in the first place?

Regards,

Stephan

p.s. I love your nick



hardbodysub -> RE: Cuck, Partnering and Safer Sex Practices (9/5/2007 6:01:09 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Stephann

... statistically, it's more dangerous to drive to the hotel to have sex with a stranger, than actually having unprotected sex with a stranger. 

...



I'd love to see how you came up with that very dubious conclusion. What statistical data was used, and where did it come from? I would be willing to wager that such a conclusion is based on either no data (rumor), bad data, or improper analysis.



Wildfleurs -> RE: Cuck, Partnering and Safer Sex Practices (9/5/2007 6:27:45 PM)

FR....

I'm also concerned about that statement (that its statistically more dangerous to drive than to have unprotected sex with someone).  I did a really quick numbers check and the number of fatal car accidents in the US was 39,189 * while the number of people diagnosed with HIV & AIDS in 2005 was 41,897.**  Not to mention, depending on the subgroup you belong to (such as black women in America between 25-34 where AIDS is the leading cause of death) the chances of contracting AIDS goes up quite a bit.

To connect the statistics to the topic, the leading way that women contract AIDS is through high risk heterosexual sex.

C~

* http://www-fars.nhtsa.dot.gov/Main/index.aspx
** http://www.cdc.gov/hiv/topics/surveillance/basic.htm and http://www.cdc.gov/hiv/topics/surveillance/resources/reports/2005report/table3.htm



iammachine -> RE: Cuck, Partnering and Safer Sex Practices (9/5/2007 8:04:01 PM)

The fun thing about forums is that they are terribly cyclic. I'm sorry if I'm beating a dead horse a bit maybe with my concerns about fluid bonding, etc. Also, maybe in rehashing some things a bit that were talked about a bit in a different cuck thread. I had followed that thread, but rather than resurrecting an old thread with a new spin, I figured I'd start my own. [:)]

/end errata

I'm not going to go data mining for numbers to cross reference vehicle related risks vs the risk of disease transmission (besides, it looks like Wildfleurs has already done that). Statistically, you may very well be right, but I'm not much of a fan of numbers, being as statistics are so horribly sensitive to context and relevance. I doubt that you would argue against the point that having unprotected sex with some fairly random stranger still probably isn't a particularly good idea, regardless of numbers. Any risk is just that, a risk, and how someone chooses to handle risks they are aware of is their perogative.

That's enough banter about that from me I think.

Back on track before I derail myself further. Thanks for your input. That's kind of the somewhat anecdotal point of view I was looking for. I'd write more, but I just received a phone call and am apparently on a time crunch to pack my things up to head out for work tomorrow (yay splitting my living between two places!).

ps: Thanks, I like it too. [;)]



Stephann -> RE: Cuck, Partnering and Safer Sex Practices (9/6/2007 11:00:34 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Wildfleurs

FR....

I'm also concerned about that statement (that its statistically more dangerous to drive than to have unprotected sex with someone).  I did a really quick numbers check and the number of fatal car accidents in the US was 39,189 * while the number of people diagnosed with HIV & AIDS in 2005 was 41,897.**  Not to mention, depending on the subgroup you belong to (such as black women in America between 25-34 where AIDS is the leading cause of death) the chances of contracting AIDS goes up quite a bit.

To connect the statistics to the topic, the leading way that women contract AIDS is through high risk heterosexual sex.

C~

* http://www-fars.nhtsa.dot.gov/Main/index.aspx
** http://www.cdc.gov/hiv/topics/surveillance/basic.htm and http://www.cdc.gov/hiv/topics/surveillance/resources/reports/2005report/table3.htm



Hi Wildfleurs,

Your statistics regarding car crashes doesn't account for severe non-fatal injuries.  Lump in those who are wheelchair bound the rest of their lives alone, and I think you'll see my point.  I could go deeper into the demographics, but it would be quite a pedantic discussion.

Hi machine,

No sweat on the new thread; just thought the old one would have good advice for you (and others who will eventually read this one as well.)

I'm not saying it's particularly wise to have lots of random sex; I'm saying that it's not playing russian roulette with a loaded gun as many proport it to be.  Frankly, I'm more worried about sleeping with a girl, and having her try and report me for rape than I am about contracting AIDS from her.  We worry about what we worry about; that's the heart of RACK methinks.

And for derailing, I should add I've never actually acted on my own interests in this topic; the opportunity simply hasn't arisen.  I'm sure at some point in the next 20 years it will, and I'll let you know how it goes then ;)

Stephan



SpoiledBitch -> RE: Cuck, Partnering and Safer Sex Practices (9/6/2007 1:41:34 PM)

quote:

In short, statistically, it's more dangerous to drive to the hotel to have sex with a stranger, than actually having unprotected sex with a stranger. 



OMG are you kidding?!!
If someone plans on crunching the numbers on this - please compare the numbers of Fatal/Debilitating Automobile Injuries Vs. Incurable STD's (Herpes, Hepatitis, HIV, AIDS, etc....)



hardbodysub -> RE: Cuck, Partnering and Safer Sex Practices (9/6/2007 6:11:50 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Wildfleurs

FR....

I'm also concerned about that statement (that its statistically more dangerous to drive than to have unprotected sex with someone).  I did a really quick numbers check and the number of fatal car accidents in the US was 39,189 * while the number of people diagnosed with HIV & AIDS in 2005 was 41,897.**  Not to mention, depending on the subgroup you belong to (such as black women in America between 25-34 where AIDS is the leading cause of death) the chances of contracting AIDS goes up quite a bit.

To connect the statistics to the topic, the leading way that women contract AIDS is through high risk heterosexual sex.

C~

* http://www-fars.nhtsa.dot.gov/Main/index.aspx
** http://www.cdc.gov/hiv/topics/surveillance/basic.htm and http://www.cdc.gov/hiv/topics/surveillance/resources/reports/2005report/table3.htm



And that's just HIV/AIDS. Don't forget the other diseases that you could contract. Plus, if you belong to the relevant subgroup mentioned, people who have unprotected sex with strangers, the chances of contracting a serious disease is significantly greater than that of the general population.

I'd feel pretty comfortable taking my chances driving to the hotel 100 times, rather than having unprotected sex with 100 strangers.



Wildfleurs -> RE: Cuck, Partnering and Safer Sex Practices (9/6/2007 9:08:15 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Stephann

quote:

ORIGINAL: Wildfleurs

FR....

I'm also concerned about that statement (that its statistically more dangerous to drive than to have unprotected sex with someone).  I did a really quick numbers check and the number of fatal car accidents in the US was 39,189 * while the number of people diagnosed with HIV & AIDS in 2005 was 41,897.**  Not to mention, depending on the subgroup you belong to (such as black women in America between 25-34 where AIDS is the leading cause of death) the chances of contracting AIDS goes up quite a bit.

To connect the statistics to the topic, the leading way that women contract AIDS is through high risk heterosexual sex.

C~

* http://www-fars.nhtsa.dot.gov/Main/index.aspx
** http://www.cdc.gov/hiv/topics/surveillance/basic.htm and http://www.cdc.gov/hiv/topics/surveillance/resources/reports/2005report/table3.htm



Hi Wildfleurs,

Your statistics regarding car crashes doesn't account for severe non-fatal injuries.  Lump in those who are wheelchair bound the rest of their lives alone, and I think you'll see my point.  I could go deeper into the demographics, but it would be quite a pedantic discussion.



Before we go any farther I do think its important for me to add that I absolutely think that people should be able to make informed decisions based on what works best for them.    My involvement in this thread is just because I do find it disconcerting to have the belief that statistics substantiate that its safer to drive a car than have unprotected sex.  I have a background in statistics so it’s not to hard for me to know where to get the numbers.  And I was curious about this issue of injuries versus fatalities and so I took a look at the number of non-fatal injurous STDs contracted with the number of non-fatal injurous car accidents.  Apparently your chances of contracting a non-fatal STD is pretty damn high as compared to your chances of getting injured in a car accident even if you include non-motorists.     So, taking your chances with a car is still the safer bet whether we are talking death or injury.

Total number of motorists and non-motorists injured in car accidents in America in 2005: 2,699,000 *

Total number of STD's diagnosed in America 2005 (Chlamydia, Gonorrhea, Syphillis, Genital Herpes, Genital Warts, Pelvic Inflammatory Disease, and Human Papilomavirus): 8,323,762 **

The actual breakdown per STD is:

  • 976,445 – chlamydia diagnoses
  • 339,593 - Gonorrhea
  • 8,724 – syphilis
  • Genital Herpes – 266,000 
  • Genital Warts - 357,000
  • Pelvic Inflammatory Disease - 176,000 
  • Human Papillomavirus (hpv) – 6.2 million

* NHTSA Traffic Safety Facts: July 2007
** http://www.cdc.gov/nchstp/dstd/Stats_Trends/Stats_and_Trends.htm



e01n -> RE: Cuck, Partnering and Safer Sex Practices (9/7/2007 3:40:56 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Wildfleurs: Before we go any farther I do think its important for me to add that I absolutely think that people should be able to make informed decisions based on what works best for them.

I think this was the crux of OPs point: this is a request by someone for something that is of some risk. There's really not a way to get around the fact that in order to the cuck's fantasy to work, someone's going to have to have fluids exchanged. She knows she's at risk - thus the post's existence.

Whether, in a quantifiable sense, it is more or less dangerous to do something doesn't change the fact that it's still a dangerous thing to do.

So, that being said - this isn't "safe" in SSC terms. It *is* feasible as RACK, though.

And since that horse seems to no longer have a pulse...

Logistics: the method of getting the semen into the woman is obvious, as is the cuck's method of "cleaning". But how does it work in between? Is it normal to do this immediately after intercourse - the cuck present in the room or in the closet - or is there some way for the woman to retain the semen inside her? Or is leakage desirable - licking his way up her leg as foreplay to the "cleaning"?



Lordandmaster -> RE: Cuck, Partnering and Safer Sex Practices (9/7/2007 3:47:38 PM)

You know, I've been hearing this a lot lately.

Put the cuck in a chastity device, tie him up and shove a plug up his ass whenever he gets unruly, and he'll do a lot less topping from the bottom.

Afterwards, if he's been a good boy, he can lick her panties, or her used pussy, or whatever else makes his dick ache inside that cage.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cuckme4Life

Cuckolding does seem to fit into a role of topping from the bottom



Grlwithboy -> RE: Cuck, Partnering and Safer Sex Practices (9/7/2007 4:18:20 PM)

My Bull and I are not fluid bonded and use condoms. My husband and I are, but if I'm suspect about my Bull's cum in me, I'm as suspect about it in him. Yeah, the whole fantasy is stellar, but I have no interest in doing it with guys who are more hung up about licking spooge out of me than they are about me fucking whom I want and being safe doing it.




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