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RE: If you released your Dominant. - 9/5/2007 5:53:26 AM

RRafe

Posts: 2060
Joined: 8/29/2007
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Interesting........for those subs who think that releaing a Top is not an option, I wonder how many of you Tops feel that your releasing THEM is not an option?

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RE: If you released your Dominant. - 9/5/2007 6:02:54 AM

Satyr6406

Posts: 820
Joined: 3/27/2006
From: New Brunswick, N.J.
Status: offline

In my house, a submissive always has choices. I don't "release". I tell her she is displeasing to me and she needs to be on about her own business.

As for her, "asking for release"? She need not. She has three choices, every second of every minute of every day:

1) "Yes, Michael Sir/Daddy."
2) "Can we talk about this, please?"
3) "I can't serve you, anymore."

Peace and comfort,

Michael

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Peace and comfort,

Michael

Former Vice-President Gore didn't invent the internet but, he DID make up global warming!

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Post #: 42

RE: If you released your Dominant. - 9/5/2007 6:04:10 AM

ownedgirlie

Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: RRafe

Interesting........for those subs who think that releaing a Top is not an option, I wonder how many of you Tops feel that your releasing THEM is not an option?

I can only release that which I own. I do not own my Master. I could, however, ask to be released, and if he felt it appropriate, he would release me. He doesn't want to own a slave who does not want to belong to him. He's not really into forced slavery, in fact, he rather loathes it.

However, I don't foresee asking for release.

As for his release of me not being an option, well first he is my owner, and not someone I consider a "top." And he has every option in the world to release me, although he doesn't want to. He rather enjoys what he has in me. But if he did want to release me, why would I want to belong to someone who didn't want to own me? If he ever doesn't want me, I would hope he would release me.

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Post #: 43

RE: If you released your Dominant. - 9/5/2007 6:26:28 AM

RRafe

Posts: 2060
Joined: 8/29/2007
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I don't tend to subdivide general classifications-Top is a Top to me. As far as the rest, sounds very reasonable.

quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie

quote:

ORIGINAL: RRafe

Interesting........for those subs who think that releaing a Top is not an option, I wonder how many of you Tops feel that your releasing THEM is not an option?

I can only release that which I own. I do not own my Master. I could, however, ask to be released, and if he felt it appropriate, he would release me. He doesn't want to own a slave who does not want to belong to him. He's not really into forced slavery, in fact, he rather loathes it.

However, I don't foresee asking for release.

As for his release of me not being an option, well first he is my owner, and not someone I consider a "top." And he has every option in the world to release me, although he doesn't want to. He rather enjoys what he has in me. But if he did want to release me, why would I want to belong to someone who didn't want to own me? If he ever doesn't want me, I would hope he would release me.

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Post #: 44

RE: If you released your Dominant. - 9/5/2007 6:34:37 AM

RRafe

Posts: 2060
Joined: 8/29/2007
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But let's get back on topic now-was there drama?

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RE: If you released your Dominant. - 9/5/2007 6:56:58 AM

gypsygrl

Posts: 1471
Joined: 10/8/2005
From: new york state
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Part of the drama in my breakup (which occurred more than two years ago), involved his contention that I couldn't, as a submissive, end the relationship. According to him, I couldn't, in effect, release myself or him though, like others, I woudn't use those words. I think of it as withdrawing my consent, after which point his attempts to maintain his 'mastery' and continuing contact became abuse and a legal matter and I treated it as such when I sought the assistence of an agency dealing with relationship abuse and filed a police report. After I withdrew consent, it ceased to be my problem, but the cops problem and I took their advice in dealing with it.

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Post #: 46

RE: If you released your Dominant. - 9/5/2007 7:25:19 AM

RRafe

Posts: 2060
Joined: 8/29/2007
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Nodding......we need to remember that the surrounding culture does not legally support non consenting relationships. It's not real-only a fantasy.

quote:

ORIGINAL: gypsygrl

Part of the drama in my breakup (which occurred more than two years ago), involved his contention that I couldn't, as a submissive, end the relationship. According to him, I couldn't, in effect, release myself or him though, like others, I woudn't use those words. I think of it as withdrawing my consent, after which point his attempts to maintain his 'mastery' and continuing contact became abuse and a legal matter and I treated it as such when I sought the assistence of an agency dealing with relationship abuse and filed a police report. After I withdrew consent, it ceased to be my problem, but the cops problem and I took their advice in dealing with it.

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Post #: 47

RE: If you released your Dominant. - 9/5/2007 7:32:57 AM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: mmb1

I am just trying to understand how releasement if you both love each other is in both's "best interest", rather than sticking it out, expecting that with any relationship, there are ups and downs?

You can love each other and still have the relationship be a toxic one. In that case, it's best to end it.

There was very little drama when I broke up with my ex-Dom. At least until about a year later, when he realized that I was serious about a lifetime commitment to my current Master.

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Post #: 48

RE: If you released your Dominant. - 9/5/2007 9:36:40 AM

toservez

Posts: 1733
Joined: 9/7/2006
From: All over now in Minnesota
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quote:

ORIGINAL: RRafe

Nodding......we need to remember that the surrounding culture does not legally support non consenting relationships. It's not real-only a fantasy.

I agree.

People can use whatever terms or fantasy rituals they like but in the end both people have the power and the right to end a relationship.

Those who think they only can or they cannot depending on what side you are on that thought is simply not a healthy one and no amount of polish, theory or based in pride of some value(s) can make it different.

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I am sorry I do not fit Webster's defintion of a slave but thankfully my Master is not Webster.

"Anything that contradicts experience and logic should be abandoned." - H.H. The 14th Dalai Lama

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RE: If you released your Dominant. - 9/5/2007 10:27:10 AM

IrishMist

Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: RRafe

Interesting........for those subs who think that releaing a Top is not an option, I wonder how many of you Tops feel that your releasing THEM is not an option?

In the past, I asked for release from him once. He laughed at me and told me to grow up

Only once did he ever put my things on the door step and told me that if I wanted it to end, then it was going to be my decision to walk through the door and that I would never get this chance again. I chose to stay; once after that I tried to leave and he literally dragged me back....

OO I so love the caveman approach

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RE: If you released your Dominant. - 9/5/2007 3:30:02 PM

orfunboi

Posts: 1223
Joined: 10/22/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: callistaIn

If I released him? I am sorry, but the idea itself is just too funny to even comprehend.

Once I am his; I can not release him. Only he can release me.

i'm really sorry to hear that.

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Post #: 51

RE: If you released your Dominant. - 9/5/2007 3:57:01 PM

littlebitxxx

Posts: 732
Status: offline

Nope, there was no drama. Just two adults that, after 8 months of trying, went their separate D/s ways remaining good friends, vanilla lovers and trainer/trainee (with the sub as trainer...lol). But I will tell you it hurt...it hurt like hell. I was more upset than when my marriage of 21 years ended.

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The people that mind don't matter and the people that matter don't mind.

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Post #: 52