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RE: what would you do? - 9/10/2007 7:52:17 AM   
BoiJen


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Joined: 3/7/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: camille65

But Master......

we never discussed using my skin for lampshades when we first met!



*it puts the lotion on its skin*


great example!

(in reply to camille65)
Profile   Post #: 61
RE: what would you do? - 9/10/2007 7:52:53 AM   
chellekitty


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yep i agree...if you can't handle the heat, get the fuck outa the kitchen...but i decline invitations to attend pity parties on a regular basis...

and camille...hehehe...it could be a really hot mind fuck....for a while....

(in reply to BoiJen)
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RE: what would you do? - 9/10/2007 8:43:44 AM   
SlaveOwnerDave


Posts: 113
Joined: 8/22/2007
From: Petaluma, CA
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DaughterSlave:
My question would be: Does He want another slave or does He want another woman? If this second slave is really a girlfriend made up to look like a slave then I would say He is failing to consider your needs. On purpose.

"you love him to death." If so then you will put up with this. But you need to tell him your fears and dislike of the situation. It might not be as bad as you [and I] think. It might even be worse. you and He need to truly communicate about this!

I am up-front that I want many slaves. I require that a new slave being considered be compatible with the slave(s) I already have. My intent is to build a Family, not a stable of sex toys. [Pardon My bluntness. He seems to have failed to discuss this with you.]

And, , if it IS a new girlfriend... then it is only fair that you get a boyfriend as well. Of course the situation would then devolve into two new relationships--or one--or zero! If you cannot handle this then the relationship is over, and He is the cause.

Before you talk with Him, read all the posts here. Decide which sound useful to you. "Learn" them. Consider their ideas and arguments carefully. Then have a heart-to-heart talk with him. If He truly cannot work with your needs then He does not "love [you] to death". And that would be heartbreaking.

_____________________________

Intelligence, Logic, and Reason are useful--but only when used!

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(in reply to DaughterSlave)
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RE: what would you do? - 9/10/2007 8:51:40 AM   
BoiJen


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what's wrong with a stable of sex toys?

(in reply to SlaveOwnerDave)
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RE: what would you do? - 9/10/2007 9:00:31 AM   
chellekitty


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just got mental images of people riding saddled giant blow up penises....thanks jen...

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One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer

(in reply to BoiJen)
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RE: what would you do? - 9/10/2007 9:34:55 AM   
BoiJen


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your welcome chelle...

(in reply to chellekitty)
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RE: what would you do? - 9/10/2007 10:20:16 AM   
xoxi


Posts: 1066
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quote:

ORIGINAL: CuriousLord

quote:

ORIGINAL: xoxi

I would cry. A lot.  I would lock myself in my apartment for a week resenting him and eating ice cream and crying into my pillow when I sleep and waking up after having nightmares about it.  And I would pray that he change his mind and realize he actually loves me enough to want to be with me.

But I have really bad coping skills.


Hah, aw!  That's adorable.  *Hug.*


Heh thanks...I figured the OP might want a bit of empathy.  Don't get me wrong, there's some great advice in this thread and I would also do a variation of discussing it with him.  But crying would definitely come between "hell no" and "ok lets talk about this"...and a pint of godiva ice cream...and one of those BIG bags of dark chocolate m&m's...you know how they have the giant bags that are for parties and stuff....yeah that would be gone in 3 days or less. 

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RE: what would you do? - 9/10/2007 11:02:35 AM   
susie


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quote:

ORIGINAL: PlayfulOne

quote:

ORIGINAL: Stephann
I won't flex too many brain cells on this one.


Thats a wise choice.  This "family" needs a permanent thread called,  "and the train wreck this week is".

newsflash for ya daughterslave,  they are a couple so your already part of a group.  Deal with it or move on,  what did you expect? Or you could just have him as he so tactfully put it in a thread he started once, "shove your slaves face in the wall and fuck her in the ass", or something of that nature.

K



I'll go along with both these posts. The "Master/Daddy" makes it quite clear in his profile that whilst he has one live in sub and his part time "daughter" (the OP who I should point out that according to her profile also has a vanilla boyfriend) he is also looking for others.

I think the OP knew full well what the situation was when she entered this "relationship"

(in reply to PlayfulOne)
Profile   Post #: 68
RE: what would you do? - 9/10/2007 11:23:55 AM   
submittous


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Well really not enough information to be much help.... what sort of relationship?, "master" means so many things these days. Are you Master/slave and if so for how long and under what specific protocols and commintments? What sort of communication system does your M/s have as it's base? Why can't your ususal communications and relationships skills be used to understand him and his needs? Is this whole idea a total surprise? Is he (or you) changing the pre-agreed rules? If so do you think he had it planned for a while or is just a lark? It sounds like you know what you want to do, why are you not doing it?

In the end my experience is most slaves know many of those answers but don't want to admit them... is that the case for you?

Trust youself, as Guy Baldwin says in 'slavecraft" take care of the property (yourself)

best of luck

Bill

_____________________________

"If you are lucky enough to find a way of life you love, you have to find the courage to live it." John Irving

(in reply to Kelika)
Profile   Post #: 69
RE: what would you do? - 9/10/2007 11:28:20 AM   
DiurnalVampire


Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DaughterSlave

You  have a master and you love him to death. All of a sudden he want to have another female slave to join  your relationship. You  really don't wantto share him. What would you do?


Simple, Id find out why all of a sudden he wants to change things. Maybe he thinks you'd enjoy a second slave. Maybe there are needs he has that you arent meeting and rather than tax your relationship, he is looking elsewhere to meet them (much like my current relationship). Or maybe he had planned all along to seek a second, once you two were established and somewhere n the communication sceme you didnt pick up on it or he ddnt feel it necessary to tell you.
WHAT Id do would depend gretly on WHY someone else was doing something.  With Angel and I, under any other circumstances, had I wanted to see someone else, he would have bolted.  However, my reasons for having another benefit him as well as myself. It takes unwanted pressure off him to take care of a need I have that he cant take care of for me. Win-win, and he has learned to understand that.

DV



_____________________________

I will be your Dominate if you will be my submit - Fox

Snarko Ergo Sum
If you cannot change your mind, how are you so sure you still have one? -proverb

*Owner of Fox - collared 10/13/07*
VampiresLair

(in reply to DaughterSlave)
Profile   Post #: 70
RE: what would you do? - 9/10/2007 11:34:49 AM   
xoxi


Posts: 1066
Status: offline
And actually...as far as negotiating poly up front...I never even heard of "polyamory" until I got involved on internet bdsm sites.  I'd heard of polygamy sure, but it was something for Mormons and Muslims.  I'd already been with 2 guys with D/s oriented relationships and we got into some pretty extreme play (gun play, rape fantasy etc.) before I even got on bondage sites online.  And I'm not into the local scene here either - bdsm is something I do behind closed doors.  So it's VERY easy to be in a hardcore BDSM or D/s relationship without even knowing the first thing about polyamory.

Obviously the OP is on an internet site so I would guess she has at least heard of polyamory...but still if you look at the interest list on CM 'polyamory' and 'swingng' are listed, but 'monogamy' isn't.  Even this site would consider monogamy the 'norm' of what the majority does.  I think if two people are in a committed relationship it's up to the poly person to explain that he doesn't see 'committed' as straightforward commitment, but rather a flexible commitment that can include commitment to other people as well.

Of course if you meet online and his profile says 'poly' you're on your own there sister

< Message edited by xoxi -- 9/10/2007 11:42:17 AM >

(in reply to submittous)
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RE: what would you do? - 9/10/2007 11:37:57 AM   
came4U


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Joined: 1/23/2007
From: London, Ontario
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I don't know how anyone can 'play' or be with someone for any legnth of time and this hasn't come up even once before.

Being a second woman to a guy did you really expect it to stop there? Why has it gone this far without crucial discussions about any of these important limits or situations. lol geez.  I'd want to know about these things in a first conversation. No big surprises later huh.

(in reply to xoxi)
Profile   Post #: 72
RE: what would you do? - 9/10/2007 11:41:29 AM   
Readysub


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i'd look for another master

(in reply to missturbation)
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RE: what would you do? - 9/10/2007 11:43:25 AM   
CreativeDominant


Posts: 11032
Joined: 3/11/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DaughterSlave

You  have a master and you love him to death. All of a sudden he want to have another female slave to join  your relationship. You  really don't wantto share him. What would you do?


Having read your posts before and having read your journal and your profile, I'd say this:

There is absolutely nothing in your profile that states that you do/do not want to be part of a family.  Your journal states that you have joined a "family" where there is a "mommy" too.  His profile makes it clear that he had one submissive already in place before you joined.  Yet now, you want to bitch because he wants to bring another slave in because "you don't want to share him"?  You are already sharing him...you were from the moment you met him.  If you had a problem with sharing, that was the time it should have been brought up, don't you think?  Before you agreed to become part of his "family"? And any answer that states something along the lines of "well, I didn't think it was something that had to be discussed"...given the situation you were walking into...comes across as either naive or deliberately self-deceptive.

Sorry if this sounds like I am coming down too hard...perhaps blame it on a difficult weekend for me...but I really don't think so.  You want some advice to go along with the coming down?  O.K....stop/start being the daughter/slave and do some talking with Daddy/Master.  Clarify...if need be...in your own head what he wants in terms of number of slaves and where your place in this number is going to be.  Then make a decision as to whether you can live with it or not and act accordingly.

And by the way, living with it...as my slave anyway...would not be accepting Daddy's/Master's wants/rights/desires but continuing to undermine what he has stated he wants by surface obedience with pouting/crying/complaining/disobedience elsewhere in the dynamic.

(in reply to DaughterSlave)
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RE: what would you do? - 9/10/2007 1:03:36 PM   
mistoferin


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Amazing! 4 pages of advice to deal with an imaginary problem in an imaginary relationship!



_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to CreativeDominant)
Profile   Post #: 75
RE: what would you do? - 9/11/2007 8:07:22 PM   
TemptingNviceSub


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Joined: 10/1/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

Amazing! 4 pages of advice to deal with an imaginary problem in an imaginary relationship!


Ok.Mist..dish !! what did we miss??....Tempting

_____________________________

I have greatly enjoyed the second blooming...suddenly you find at the age of 50, that a whole new life has opened before you.........Agatha Christie.

You must make tracks into the unknown~~Thoreau

(in reply to mistoferin)
Profile   Post #: 76
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