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Older, mature subs - 7/15/2005 6:08:35 PM   
sultryvoice


Posts: 368
Joined: 3/31/2004
Status: offline 		I would like some input on those of us that are getting older and are looking for a Dominant. I am 50 and it seems to be more difficult for me than someone much younger. I know I have gotten much better with age, but I am not that pretty and pert young thing. I do have to say, on my behalf, I have really gotten myself together. I have also found this to be true with others in my age group. One thing i do find is that there are more younger men interested in older women. Thoughts? Reflections? Anything?

Respectfully,
sultry
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Older, mature subs - 7/15/2005 6:13:30 PM   
stormsfate


Posts: 849
Joined: 2/1/2005
Status: offline 		Where's proudsub? There was a thread on this not too long ago....

*Edited to add link Older Slaves


best regards,
fate

< Message edited by stormsfate -- 7/15/2005 6:15:23 PM >

_____________________________

Vision? What do you know about MY vision? My vision would turn your world upside down, tear asunder your illusions and the sanctuary of your own ignorance crashing down around you! Now ask yourself, are you really ready to see that vision? [/size

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RE: Older, mature subs - 7/15/2005 6:16:09 PM   
fastlane


Posts: 2159
Joined: 5/26/2005
Status: offline 		your pic looks pretty hot, sultry. I'm early forties and always worry about the same things you eluded too. Am I growing gray, bald,fat,soft..LOL
Then I look in the mirror and say "Hell No."
I'm not only fit and handsome, I'm now soooo much smarter and have soooo much more money than I did when I was wet behind the ears. Also, I run into lovely women like yourself that are anxious to serve and still old enough to drink legally.
Life is good, you are Hot....flaunt it!

_____________________________

Just because it hurts, doesn't necessarily make it a bad thing.

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RE: Older, mature subs - 7/15/2005 6:16:15 PM   
dominmd


Posts: 474
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline 		Younger men like older women because they have more experience and many times are more experimental. Sometimes it has to do with maturity. An older woman usually knows what she wants, how she wants it, etc. Where many younger and vanilla women do not have a clue what they want, or even what they like.

Anyway these are just my thoughts and views. Believe me when I say, Finding an intelligent, witty, fun, classy and graceful woman is hard these days. She can be all these things and be kinky too (always a plus).

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Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Older, mature subs - 7/15/2005 6:52:34 PM   
Lordandmaster


Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline 		I've always preferred older subs and have written about this in the past. Basically, my attitude is that it takes a lot of self-awareness to be submissive, and this usually takes some time and introspection to attain. Not to say that younger submissives aren't capable of it, but they usually don't have the experience (and I don't mean just BDSM experience) and maturity. Of course, not all older subs have the self-awareness I'm talking about. If you don't ask yourself who you are, and come to accept yourself over time, you won't be mature just because you're old.

I'm also physically attracted to older submissives.

(in reply to sultryvoice)
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RE: Older, mature subs - 7/15/2005 6:55:29 PM   
sultryvoice


Posts: 368
Joined: 3/31/2004
Status: offline 		Thank you stormsfate. I went back and read that thread. It helped me. Also, fastlane, thank you for the compliments. Life is good otherwise. I am mentoring someone and I am going somewhere all the time, munch, party and so on. I have never been lonely and have been alone for long periods. Now I find myself lonely. I suppose that has much to do with how I am feeling these days..But thanks to those who have written in response so far this evening..

Respectfully,
sultry

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Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Older, mature subs - 7/15/2005 8:33:58 PM   
lonewolf05


Posts: 830
Joined: 6/21/2005
Status: offline 		thoughts? no.

reflections? no.


anything? yeah kinda sorta. being over 50 myself "I" play holy hell finding ANY domme interested because they all SEEM to want those young "boys"....not men in my mind........boys. esp since i am old enough to be daddy to MOST of em.

but yeah thats it from me.

take care
be well
the wolf


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"there is no gravity, life sucks!"


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RE: Older, mature subs - 7/16/2005 8:02:54 AM   
sub4hire


Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

I am 50 and it seems to be more difficult for me than someone much younger.


Where ever you are hanging out, you're in the wrong place. I live in So Cal, where yes there is a hotbed of activity lifestyle wise. However, over the year's I have noticed it doesn't really matter how old you are.
We have friends who are in their 70's and hooked up 2 year's ago. Great little D/s couple. Of course it is also your own personal preference if you want a 20 year old you may have issues.
There also is something to do with the maturity thing. I would think an older man would not want a child.
I'm not looking but I do talk with a lot who are looking.
Humble is good. Arrogant is bad. Depending on the man..sluttiness can be in your favor or go gravely against you.
Men don't like know it all's. Especially when they are supposed to be dominant over you. Yet they cherish those who are not doormats.

Anyway, just a few random thoughts. I would'nt worry, just try to be patient.

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RE: Older, mature subs - 7/16/2005 9:00:26 AM   
happypervert


Posts: 2203
Joined: 5/11/2004
From: Scranton, PA
Status: offline
quote:

One thing i do find is that there are more younger men interested in older women.

Sure, but that doesn't mean you're interested in them. Since you say you've gotten a lot better than you used to be it is likely that one of the younger guys would have to be exceptional to catch your interest.

I suspect one thing that makes it appear that it is harder to find somebody is that older, er, more mature folks have a better idea of what they're NOT looking for. So the pool of potential matches gets whittled down by your now higher standards. That's not necessarily a bad thing because it just keeps you from wasting time from flirting with guys you already know are unsuitable.

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Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Older, mature subs - 7/16/2005 10:28:23 AM   
sjacket


Posts: 152
Joined: 1/4/2004
Status: offline 		I am 47, and Mistress is a few years younger. She has had younger boys serve, and my last Owner was 15 years younger than me. While we shared some common interests outside BDSM, eventually the difference in age and over-all experiences got in the way.

Now, I am with someone who is so much more compatable in all areas- lifestyle and otherwise. I don't have a CK model's body, but She was looking for spirit and desire- that I could fill.

And attending local munches and parties, it seems that most are closer to our ages. There are for more 30+ers, than there are those in their 20-30s. Be confident and happy in who you and what you are.

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Have you hugged your Sadist today?

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Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Older, mature subs - 7/16/2005 12:26:49 PM   
hullman


Posts: 12
Joined: 7/6/2005
Status: offline 		as a master and 50 i have had a few young ones and to be honest most are wannabes ,there is a few who in time will be good subs ,but as for me knw im looking but the older sub is more appealing as they truly know what they are and accept there role in life. and sultry you are one gracefull sub

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Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Older, mature subs - 7/16/2005 3:20:29 PM   
sultryvoice


Posts: 368
Joined: 3/31/2004
Status: offline 		subforhire...where I live is much, much smaller than CA. You have to take what it is here. Things are changing and improving though. A new club will be opening shortly and I am very involved in it..This should help with bringing more people out. We will see..
Thank you for your insight.

Respectfully,
sultry

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Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Older, mature subs - 7/16/2005 3:32:51 PM   
sultryvoice


Posts: 368
Joined: 3/31/2004
Status: offline 		hullman,
thank you for your nice comments and compliment..

sultry

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Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Older, mature subs - 7/16/2005 4:32:48 PM   
proudsub


Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline
quote:

Where's proudsub? There was a thread on this not too long ago....

*Edited to add link Older Slaves


Sorry got to this thread a little late, thanks for covering for me fate.

At 59 and taken, i still get offers from doms of all ages.

_____________________________

proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan


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Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Older, mature subs - 7/16/2005 5:11:12 PM   
slavedesires


Posts: 669
Joined: 3/2/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sultryvoice

I would like some input on those of us that are getting older and are looking for a Dominant. I am 50 and it seems to be more difficult for me than someone much younger. I know I have gotten much better with age, but I am not that pretty and pert young thing. I do have to say, on my behalf, I have really gotten myself together. I have also found this to be true with others in my age group. One thing i do find is that there are more younger men interested in older women. Thoughts? Reflections? Anything?

Respectfully,
sultry


I am not sure why older woman think younger men are the devil in sheeps clothing with a whip??
I dated ONLY yonger men until i met my Dom.
12 to 22 yrs younger.
No they couldnt hold that near orgasm as long and only wanted to roll over and sleep...but hell..... they were fun romps with a flogger.

Younger girls are moldable, older woman have baggage and a heavy sense of what they demand from a guy..... well so do some young girls who havent a clue about real life...after all, some young ones think they are experts in everything and all older woman are good for is being a grandma...... they will NEVER know !!
But the flip side is also true of older women...know it all cause they have life's experience.

hell, i am 50 going on 31 at my next birthday party.

~~shy


_____________________________

i speak only my personal opinion, sometimes O/ours.

"i am the keeper of fragile things and i have kept what is indisolvable."
....the greatest gift.....vulnerability

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Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Older, mature subs - 7/16/2005 6:57:34 PM   
sultryvoice


Posts: 368
Joined: 3/31/2004
Status: offline 		I do see Doms younger than me..Right now I play with one occasionally that is 32 and has been in the scene for near 13 years. He has been everywhere and has done most everything. I have learned and still learning from him. He lives out of town and I want someone around more..I thought it would be better to have someone around my age, more in common and so forth. I have spoken and met a new Dom and he only wants an older submissive. I am hearing that so much lately. But, do I have enough in common with them to make it work? That is where I see potential problems. Am I wrong here or right? I know I keep asking but everyones comments make me think of more..

Resectfully,
sultry

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Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Older, mature subs - 7/17/2005 3:29:07 AM   
lonewolf05


Posts: 830
Joined: 6/21/2005
Status: offline 		i'm 51 going on 65

wolf

(in reply to slavedesires)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Older, mature subs - 7/22/2005 8:32:54 AM   
HalloweenWhite


Posts: 1028
Joined: 6/20/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sultryvoice

I would like some input on those of us that are getting older and are looking for a Dominant. I am 50 and it seems to be more difficult for me than someone much younger. I know I have gotten much better with age, but I am not that pretty and pert young thing. I do have to say, on my behalf, I have really gotten myself together. I have also found this to be true with others in my age group. One thing i do find is that there are more younger men interested in older women. Thoughts? Reflections? Anything?

Respectfully,
sultry



From a young (ish) male point of view You are an attractive woman. Just dont let it get you down that you seem to be over looked by many Doms. My advice is because you live in the U.S and you all seem more adventurous than us brits. just get out there to all the munches,parties,fairs,demos you can. Youre bound to catch someone's eye. Also,why not find ways to show off your skills as a subby?, there must be demo organisers who need willing victims etc.

I wish you all the luck in the world,t.c

HalloweenWhite.

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Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Older, mature subs - 7/22/2005 9:23:30 AM   
jocelyn


Posts: 59
Joined: 6/28/2005
Status: offline
apologies....not too adept at the board's systems yet.....

=)

jocelyn

< Message edited by jocelyn -- 7/26/2005 9:37:43 PM >

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Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Older, mature subs - 7/22/2005 9:37:26 AM   
jocelyn


Posts: 59
Joined: 6/28/2005
Status: offline 		Sultry,

At 52, my search felt more like an exercise in becoming the most practiced lurker most evenings than anything else. I do think that younger people have different priorities sometimes, and it makes me smile when I try to recall what it felt like to be 30 and all-knowing. I stayed with it, though, nurtured the friendships that I knew that were limited to instant messages or phone calls, and continued to refine that sacred wish list that had two columns on it in my mind - my offerings on the right and His character traits on the left. He found me.

Stay with it, friend - you're "polishing the stone" as it were - and perfecting that gift of self that you'll see reflected in His eyes someday.

jocelyn

_____________________________

If chocolate is not the answer, I'm not certain that the question matters...

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Profile   Post #: 20
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