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RE: Issues of trust - 7/20/2005 6:23:17 PM   
jocelyn


Posts: 59
Joined: 6/28/2005
Status: offline 		Nope.




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Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Issues of trust - 7/20/2005 9:45:19 PM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline
quote:

Really?! It has been my experience, that people "hung up" on lies and liars have had their fill of them in their lives. Imagine that!

Any one else care to disagree with me?


Anyone living vicariously thought others through computer chats and message boards versus living in life is living a lie. The worst lie - a lie to her/him self. Others who fain intelligence and experience by referencing self important accomplishment is living the same self lie. Anyone who assumes another's thoughts to "prove" a position is a liar. Anyone who can't face in person what they write about or complain about is the most visceral liar of all. Anyone who doesn't see the humor and joy in life and the lifestyle is lying that they get any enjoyment out of it.

(in reply to feline)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Issues of trust - 7/20/2005 9:58:55 PM   
domtimothy46176


Posts: 670
Joined: 12/25/2004
From: Dayton, Ohio area
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: feline

fate here's a scenero for you;

And let's say your working on building a trusting relationship with this person. They tell you they don't do something. No big deal, no real reason for telling you, but they do. Then a time later you find that they are doing exactly what they volunteered to you that they weren't.

Is a lie not still a lie? (please let's just stick with the lie issue right now )





Could it be a case where something had changed and he was honest when he made the statement but now things are different? For instance, saying, "I don't drink" (true then) and then he decides to have a beer at a later time, making it appear his original statement was a falsehood. Just a thought.
Timothy

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Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Issues of trust - 7/21/2005 7:16:59 AM   
sub4hire


Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		I don't agree those who live via only the computer is a lie. As long as one is honest. You can be honest online just as easy as you can be offline.
Granted, I'm with you in the mere fact to truly experience the lifestyle you must get off the computer and actually experience it. Although that is not part of this discussion.

You assume other's thoughts. You contradict yourself....not in the past month that I have noticed. Almost every thread you had was a contradiction. You continually told me that I should e-mail you in private to ask for clarification. See, the only problem with that is....I'm not the only one reading things and questioning them. So in essence you are doing everyone else a dis-service because you are clarifying yourself to one single person in private.

Myself, I'd rather hash something out in public. That way all knows what went on. No gossip that way.

I find a lot of humor in life, I just don't happen to find it at other's expenses here on the board's when they have serious questions. You're right I do have empathy for other's. You're right I do express other's thoughts in post's when they have spoken to me and don't have the guts to speak for themselves. For fear of being flamed.
That is me, that is who I was born. I stand up for other's when they cannot fight for themselves.


(in reply to Mercnbeth)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Issues of trust - 7/21/2005 8:19:14 AM   
Faramir


Posts: 1043
Joined: 2/12/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth

Anyone living vicariously thought others through computer chats and message boards versus living in life is living a lie. The worst lie - a lie to her/him self. Others who fain intelligence and experience by referencing self important accomplishment is living the same self lie. Anyone who assumes another's thoughts to "prove" a position is a liar. Anyone who can't face in person what they write about or complain about is the most visceral liar of all. Anyone who doesn't see the humor and joy in life and the lifestyle is lying that they get any enjoyment out of it.


What an entertaining place these boards are - dramatic irony abounds.

(in reply to Mercnbeth)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Issues of trust - 7/21/2005 8:45:13 AM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline
quote:

You assume other's thoughts. You contradict yourself


so do you

(eg - "rarely giving opinions.")

quote:

Myself, I'd rather hash something out in public. That way all knows what went on. No gossip that way.


ROFL

That is the most dishonest statement I've ever seen on this board. (Added by Merc - beth was the one laughing.)

< Message edited by Mercnbeth -- 7/21/2005 11:19:45 AM >

(in reply to sub4hire)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Issues of trust - 7/21/2005 10:04:38 AM   
feline


Posts: 1101
Joined: 2/23/2004
From: CA
Status: offline
quote:

Could it be a case where something had changed and he was honest when he made the statement but now things are different? For instance, saying, "I don't drink" (true then) and then he decides to have a beer at a later time, making it appear his original statement was a falsehood. Just a thought.
Timothy


Could be . . . . . since this was a hypothetical situation. *sigh*






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Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Issues of trust - 7/21/2005 1:37:55 PM   
sub4hire


Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		Since you do not understand the definition of opinion here it is for you.

o·pin·ion ( P ) Pronunciation Key (-pnyn)
n.
A belief or conclusion held with confidence but not substantiated by positive knowledge or proof: “The world is not run by thought, nor by imagination, but by opinion” (Elizabeth Drew).
A judgment based on special knowledge and given by an expert: a medical opinion.
A judgment or estimation of the merit of a person or thing: has a low opinion of braggarts.
The prevailing view: public opinion.
Law. A formal statement by a court or other adjudicative body of the legal reasons and principles for the conclusions of the court.


Not sure if you understand or not...but opinion is not the same definition of fact.
By the way, just because you've now asked me one single question in all of these month's you've known me. I gave you a very tiny answer. No contradictions here. You just didn't get the whole answer from me. I do give opinions. Educated opinions not my own prejudice like some here do.
Of course I don't expect you to understand that.

Since you've validated my earlier point by claiming to laugh, thank you. It tells me much about you.
By the way I will not hash something here on the board's out in private with you. Even if it is a public munch. Because the people here are not there. Get it?
You involve these people. Period. Guess you don't but then...that's about normal as well.


I see one single person posting here since you are so insecure two cannot post.


(in reply to Mercnbeth)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Issues of trust - 7/21/2005 1:58:51 PM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline
quote:

Since you've validated my earlier point by claiming to laugh, thank you. It tells me much about you.


With most - AT you.

But the basic hypocrisy is your statement to not gossip and address things in person. We are valid and verifiable proof you DON'T do that. It was a confirmation of what I'd heard but didn't belief until you proved it true. I work too hard not to have fun and seek laughter at every opportunity even if it comes at my expense, where most of the time I'm the first to point out. It comes from confidence - something you wouldn't understand.

As to only having one identity. We joined as a couple and participate as a couple and see no reason to change that. We are proud to be identified as a couple, seeking only examples of how to act and not to act within the lifestyle. Thanks for providing a clear example of the latter.

(in reply to sub4hire)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Issues of trust - 7/21/2005 2:03:53 PM   
sub4hire


Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

At what time have you ever offered to go post by post here with all of the contradictions?

Wait, I still have e-mails saying everyone here is a joke. CM in general is a joke.

I don't see how hashing that out with people who aren't here is going to validate any of that.

As I said in an earlier post, I haven't even seen a contradiction by you in almost a month. Its a new year.
Of course you aren't e-mailing me telling me what a joke CM is either.
For someone who thinks it all is a huge joke you sure do spend a lot of time here with us loser's.

(in reply to Mercnbeth)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Issues of trust - 7/21/2005 2:32:09 PM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline
quote:

At what time have you ever offered to go post by post here with all of the contradictions?

Wait, I still have e-mails saying everyone here is a joke. CM in general is a joke.

I don't see how hashing that out with people who aren't here is going to validate any of that.

As I said in an earlier post, I haven't even seen a contradiction by you in almost a month. Its a new year.
Of course you aren't e-mailing me telling me what a joke CM is either.
For someone who thinks it all is a huge joke you sure do spend a lot of time here with us loser's.


CONTEXT - consider it as a concept. Put contents in context, comments in context, jokes in context, inferences in context.

Yes there are loser's here, anyone pretending to be in the "lifestyle" exclusively sitting in
front of a computer screen qualifies. Others are those enabler's that help them by rationalizing that they have a life.

Sorry, but there are many people we've met from CM and see regularly who are worth the effort of putting up with the nonsense. We are contacted frequently and see new people regularly, and enjoy doing so especially now with our new place. So we'll be sticking around. Had a great time in Vegas with some of them, and looking forward to seeing more at Folsom. Amazingly, they all joke and have fun! And they all understand the concepts of "context" and as beth stated "perspective".

Happy to see you didn't disagree in the more important aspects of the post.

(in reply to sub4hire)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Issues of trust - 7/21/2005 3:10:49 PM   
sub4hire


Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

Yes there are loser's here, anyone pretending to be in the "lifestyle" exclusively sitting in
front of a computer screen qualifies. Others are those enabler's that help them by rationalizing that they have a life.


So you are defining yourself and Beth as losers now? You both sat in front of a computer screen to find one another did you not?
Regardless if you got off of the computer or not you were still loser's while searching until that fateful day you actually met face to face, correct? At what time did you stop being loser's?


The most important aspects are the lies. I do disagree with them. I'll help other's out here.

quote':Anyone who assumes another's thoughts to "prove" a position is a liar.end quote

I do not assume. People talk to me daily. Here, in e-mail and in person. People tell me exactly how they feel. But you are calling me a liar because I talk to people.

I don't get it, but again that is ok.

quote:Anyone who can't face in person what they write about or complain about is the most visceral liar of all.end quote

I am a liar because you have lied to the good people on these boards. I have called you on it several times in the past. My mistake was calling you on it in private. You want it in public at my munch. Which would be fine but then the people who have had to live it cannot go hear it.
Therefore I am a liar because I choose to do things the proper way and involve all of those you involved.

quote:Anyone who doesn't see the humor and joy in life and the lifestyle is lying that they get any enjoyment out of it. end quote

So, now I am a liar because I know for a fact...(yes because they tell me) that people are asking questions to grow as human beings. Some here laugh at them and treat them as jokes. Then in private boast about that.
That also makes me a liar in your eyes.

Sad, sad way of handling yourself when you have no defense of your own.

Which is why I chose to ignore it. Since you asked me so nicely not to...there you go.



(in reply to Mercnbeth)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: Issues of trust - 7/21/2005 3:56:31 PM   
stormsfate


Posts: 849
Joined: 2/1/2005
Status: offline 		:::sigh::: and yet another promising thread goes up in flames.

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Profile   Post #: 53
RE: Issues of trust - 7/21/2005 4:31:49 PM   
sub4hire


Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

:::sigh::: and yet another promising thread goes up in flames.


Not really, everyone here know's what issues I have issues with. I say the thread gets back on topic. If two people here had not asked me to come to this thread I never would have.

People do contact me off of collarme quite often to help them understand things.
So, I came.

Let's get back on track.

(in reply to stormsfate)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: Issues of trust - 7/21/2005 4:41:31 PM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline
quote:

I do not assume. People talk to me daily. Here, in e-mail and in person. People tell me exactly how they feel. But you are calling me a liar because I talk to people.


No, I'm calling you a liar and hypocrite because of how you were in person. Much more important to me than any computer generated fantasy life.

quote:

So you are defining yourself and Beth as losers now? You both sat in front of a computer screen to find one another did you not?


Please inform me with your Mensa validated IQ what one has to do with another? If we staying in front of the screen you would be accurate, we left it, and found the same person in person as we met on-line.

Convolute, misinterpret, assume, digress, speak in generalities without reference, and try to deflect all you like. There is nothing posted here, taken in context, I don't stand behind and represent as accurate truth. Including and especially how you are NOT direct and address things in person as you represent.

I've noted and high-lighted any mistakes and gone as far as apologized on occasion, publicly and privately. Even when faced with references and accuracy (see Dr. Laura thread) you still can't admit error. What a fraud!

(in reply to sub4hire)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Issues of trust - 7/21/2005 5:49:17 PM   
sub4hire


Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

Please inform me with your Mensa validated IQ what one has to do with another? If we staying in front of the screen you would be accurate, we left it, and found the same person in person as we met on-line.


Exactly, I am the same in person as I am online. That's how most should be. Sorry you don't understand that. You have created a persona here you cannot have in the real world.

You are the one who said all who deal online are loser's. Not me. I merely asked a question. At some point you need to stop being loser's.

Guess you could'nt follow the thread. Your own words.

quote:Convolute, misinterpret, assume, digress, speak in generalities without reference, and try to deflect all you like. There is nothing posted here, taken in context, I don't stand behind and represent as accurate truth. Including and especially how you are NOT direct and address things in person as you represent.end quote

Guess you haven't been able to follow the threads of late. We've been having this same discussion on every thread.
Should I go into it? Nah, you would'nt be able to comprehend yet again if you haven't yet.

So, in respect of Storm and other's I won't continue on in this thread. No, I will not debate you in public about things you've done to these people here. We debate here or we don't debate.

(in reply to Mercnbeth)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Issues of trust - 7/21/2005 6:11:35 PM   
subcheryl


Posts: 280
Joined: 11/2/2004
Status: offline 		First off to the op, no I don't beleive in lying, I am honest and expect people to be honest with me, I will be honest and say that there have been time that when asked how something look on someone I might say something like "it's not my favorite color on you, but it looks ok," when I really didn't care for it at all, part of that comes from not wanting to hurt that persons feelings and seeing the proud look in their eyes because it was their first outfit in perhaps a yr and they just fell in love with it. But in most things I am honest and expect it back.

Next' Mercnbeth I just want to say how much I like your postings, I have never found them distasteful or putdownish, if that is a word, sometimes a bit blunt but usually after many have tried to make the same pt in their way and the op just didn't "get it", but I still saw some tact in the way it was delivered, I hope you never leave the boards they are empty without you guys, alot of the good ones have left due to the bull sh** that goes on here in the past few months so PLEASE don't go. there are still a few of the good posters here and I still learn alot.

(in reply to Mercnbeth)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: Issues of trust - 7/21/2005 6:39:03 PM   
feline


Posts: 1101
Joined: 2/23/2004
From: CA
Status: offline
quote:

quote; Mercnbeth
So we'll be sticking around.


quote:

PLEASE don't go.


Um, if you'd read the posts you'd know they made no reference to anything of the sort. Geeze.

IMO part of the problem here is people jump in before reading an entire thread. Aaah but that's just my opinion. Humble or not.






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Variety is the soul of pleasure.
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Profile   Post #: 58
RE: Issues of trust - 7/21/2005 7:17:18 PM   
MstrHellsFury


Posts: 388
Joined: 1/5/2005
Status: offline 		right on with your comment that whole threads aren't read....maybe johnny can't read....anyway....stop that eyerollin thingie...didn't you ever hear the old expression they'll get stuck that way...lol

Fury

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Profile   Post #: 59
RE: Issues of trust - 7/21/2005 7:26:45 PM   
feline


Posts: 1101
Joined: 2/23/2004
From: CA
Status: offline
quote:

stop that eyerollin thingie...didn't you ever hear the old expression they'll get stuck that way...lol


I thought that was when you crossed your eyes? Hhmmmmm.





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Variety is the soul of pleasure.
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Profile   Post #: 60
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