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Age and bdsm - 9/14/2007 1:34:11 PM   
Prinsexx


Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline 		Well it happened!
I have I belive a new Dom.
He contacted me via a straight dating site.....(don't ask why I was there) He only sent a one liner because he had just joined and then posted a long profile, It simply said he was into sexual experimenation.
He has a beautiful face, long hair, (my type) and is into astrology...also my type....he has phoned every night for a week and he seems to read my mind....we have had passion and I feel really as high as a kite....even though I am tired.
The issue for me is that he is 25 years younger than I am. He has said it's not an issue for him. It's certainly not an issue for me as he is full of that young testosterone stuff that fires up both his imagination and desire.

It's only an issue for me if it becomes an issue for him. Does that make sense?

I am definitely sending out a vibe as so many people have remarked upon how good (blushes) I am looking at work today. I can't really disclose the nature or the intensity of the phone calls or the relationship to them but it's a satisfied glow I am sending out.

My reason for starting the thread is: has anyone else encountered age related problems.? Are they more likely to occur where the submissive female is older than her dominant?  are there any extreme of age relationships here. either in a one to one d/s relationship or a  polyamorous household?

And he's away until Tuesday which means that I am secretly craving him and having withdrawal. He certainly has got   a hold over me. It's wionderful, it's all wonderful again.
Prinsexx
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Age and bdsm - 9/14/2007 1:39:43 PM   
Bobkgin


Posts: 1335
Joined: 7/28/2007
From: Kawarthas, Ontario, Canada
Status: offline 		Congratulations !

May I suggest you put down the crystal ball and let it unravel as it will, with your input and his?

You know him best. You're the best judge of what is to come.

And since you're feet are still in the clouds, enjoy it.



_____________________________

When all is said and done, what will you regret?

That you never really lived?

Or there was so much living left to do?

For those interested: pics and poetry have been added to my profile.

(in reply to Prinsexx)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Age and bdsm - 9/14/2007 1:46:52 PM   
celticlord2112


Posts: 5732
Status: offline 		Girl, you are thinking too much.

Age is not an issue unless there's a law involved. 

He says age is not an issue.  Take him at his word and enjoy the ride.


_____________________________



(in reply to Prinsexx)
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RE: Age and bdsm - 9/14/2007 1:50:49 PM   
Prinsexx


Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline 		Thank you for the congratulations.
But I was nevertheless sincerely interested in the age thing.
I adore younger men and the older I get the more amazing this is as I am certain thatI become a better submissive as I get older. This is not what I hear is usually the case; 'daddies' and 'daughtes' (although not s predominant feature of British culture....we go more for Headmistresses and naughty boys lol) follow the mormative social role of elder man and younger wife/woman.
The older woman and younger man relationship still raises eyebrows here, except of course perhaps in the eschelons of oxford and Cambridge where many an undergraduate seeks the 'intellectual' oh yer...stimulation of an elder woman/professor.
What I have had concern to worry about for myself is my own ageing and my submissiveness.
I would if I could believe me become solely dominant (my dominant nature is only turned on by certain women) but the older I get the more submissive I become. This is my core identity as I was submissive and sexualised from infancy.
His attentions blow me away....let's hope his pherenomes and his physical presence do the same.
Am I like a fine wine that improves in the bottle?

(in reply to Bobkgin)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Age and bdsm - 9/14/2007 1:52:53 PM   
Prinsexx


Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: celticlord2112

Girl, you are thinking too much.
......... enjoy the ride.



Oh the ride will be good I will ensure it, thank you *takes a bow*

(in reply to celticlord2112)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Age and bdsm - 9/14/2007 1:56:06 PM   
Bobkgin


Posts: 1335
Joined: 7/28/2007
From: Kawarthas, Ontario, Canada
Status: offline 		I get the distinct impression you do, Ma'am. 

Any sub/slave who is thinking through what she does and why and how it feels and enjoys it is certainly going to improve what she does.

Life is a learning experience.



< Message edited by Bobkgin -- 9/14/2007 1:57:16 PM >

_____________________________

When all is said and done, what will you regret?

That you never really lived?

Or there was so much living left to do?

For those interested: pics and poetry have been added to my profile.

(in reply to Prinsexx)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Age and bdsm - 9/14/2007 1:59:21 PM   
celticlord2112


Posts: 5732
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Prinsexx

quote:

ORIGINAL: celticlord2112

Girl, you are thinking too much.
......... enjoy the ride.



Oh the ride will be good I will ensure it, thank you *takes a bow*



That's the spirit....if you want to enjoy the flavor of life, take big bites.  Moderation is for monks! (with no apologies to Robert Heinlein)


_____________________________



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RE: Age and bdsm - 9/14/2007 2:13:43 PM   
Prinsexx


Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: celticlord2112



That's the spirit....if you want to enjoy the flavor of life, take big bites.  Moderation is for monks! (with no apologies to Robert Heinlein)


Npw you have me thinking (took my mind of Domboy) about sci fi AND I think my first shorrt which I read when I was 7 (child progedy) it was not singularly responsible for my submissiveness and love of pain but it was formative and is a damn good bed time story. here is the wiki write up:
A Planet Named Shayol is a story by Cordwainer Smith (penname of Paul Linebarger) set in his Instrumentality universe. It was first published in Galaxy Science Fiction magazine in October 1961. In the story, a man convicted of crimes against the Empire is sent for punishment on the planet Shayol — a name derived from Sheol, the Hebrew version of Hades, the abode of the dead. [edit] Plot summary Mercer has been convicted of a crime that has no name. He is condemned to the planet Shayol, from where they broadcast the screams of the damned on the occasion of the Emperor's birthday. He is conducted to a satellite orbiting the planet, where he expects his punishment to start, but is treated like a patient in a hospital. After medical procedures to prepare his body for survival on Shayol, he is sent down to the surface and received by B'dikkat, a bovine-derived underperson who is the caretaker of the prisoners there. Underpeople are human in appearance but derived from domestic animals, and are treated as property. Depending on their ancestry, they may be bigger or smaller than a true human. B'dikkat is much larger. He checks Mercer to see that he is ready and sends him outside the reception building. B'dikkat himself never leaves without a huge, heavy protective suit. Soon after stepping outside, Mercer is stung by what appears to be a flash of light. Then he collapses in excruciating pain. This seems to last forever, but when he recovers, he finds himself face to face with his fellow prisoners. There are people with extra limbs, noses, eyes, organs, and in one case a string of human torsos attached to them. Shayol, it is revealed, is inhabited by tiny symbiotic creatures called dromozoans that try to help people. They put food in their stomachs, remove waste from their kidneys, and cause new parts to grow, even if they are not needed. The attentions of the dromozoa are what cause the pain suffered by the inmates. On the satellite, Mercer had been offered the chance to have his mind, his eyes, or both destroyed. He elected not to have anything done. He is not alone in this, but there are many mindless bodies which spend their entire time buried in the sand. The prisoners are given condamine (the "ultimate drug") by B'dikkat to alleviate the immense pain of their punishment. He gives doses whenever he comes out to harvest the body parts they are growing. These parts are then used in medicine across the Empire. The first man to set foot on Shayol, Go-Captain Alvarez, became infected and was left on Shayol so long that he was transformed into an enormous human foot, six stories high. Mercer develops a relationship with another prisoner, the Lady Da, who was sent there as part of a royal power struggle, along with Commander Suzdal, sentenced to Shayol after the events of "The Crime and the Glory of Commander Suzdal". Decades pass, but nothing changes, so that the inmates lose all sense of time. One day, B'dikkat drags Mercer and Lady Da into the building. They find that children have been sent to Shayol, and their brains have been removed. B'dikkat is horrified and refuses to send them outside. Lady Da knows how to contact the Lords of the Instrumentality, and soon these guardians of humanity arrive on Shayol. They are shocked by what they find. The children are the heirs to the throne — apparently the Imperium has become so bureaucratic and corrupt that it condemned them to prevent them committing treason when they grew up. The Instrumentality decides to void the agreement by which it allowed the Empire to exist and maintain Shayol. All the prisoners with functioning minds are sent to another planet, while the mindless ones are decapitated, leaving their bodies to be handled by the dromozoa while their heads are destroyed. Lady Da claims Mercer as her consort.

Enjoy

Prinsexx


(in reply to celticlord2112)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Age and BDSM - 9/14/2007 2:24:58 PM   
LATEXBABY64


Posts: 2107
Joined: 4/8/2004
Status: offline 		The one thing that  you have to becareful of is manipulation on the younger ones part i have had a few Dommes come to me and tell me they read things on the net and use that to get what they want kinda of like who is being the hunter and hunted. plus. I have already Been where they are going. I want to be somewhere I have never been. after all going back wards to go forward is kinda redundant..  

< Message edited by LATEXBABY64 -- 9/14/2007 2:30:55 PM >

(in reply to Prinsexx)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Age and BDSM - 9/14/2007 2:36:01 PM   
Prinsexx


Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline 		quote]ORIGINAL: LATEXBABY64

The one thing that  you have to becareful of is manipulation on the younger ones part i have had a few Dommes come to me and tell me they read things on the net and use that to get what they want kinda of like who is being the hunter and hunted. plus. I have already Been where they are going. I want to be somewhere I have never been. after all going back wards to go forward is kinda redundant..  
[/quote]

I respect your posts Latexbabes
but Are you suggesting it is only the younger ones who use the net to get what they want?[

(in reply to LATEXBABY64)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Age and BDSM - 9/14/2007 2:41:45 PM   
LATEXBABY64


Posts: 2107
Joined: 4/8/2004
Status: offline 		as an ex rock musican it was all about the sex when your younger thats just natural male drive

(in reply to Prinsexx)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Age and BDSM - 9/14/2007 2:48:51 PM   
Prinsexx


Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline 		oh do you know him lol he's an ex rock musician
mind you that's what i like anyways

If you can just get your,... mind together
then come on across to me
We'll hold hands an' then we'll watch the sun rise
.....from the bottom of the sea
But first

Are You Experienced?
Ah! Have you ever been experienced?
Well, I have

I know, I know
you'll probably scream n' cry
That your little world won't let go!
But who in your measly little world are trying to prove that
You're made out of gold and -a can't be sold

So-uh, Are You Experienced?
Ah! Have you ever been experienced?
Well, I have

Ah, let me prove it to you,..........

Trumpets and violins like up here in the distance
I think they're calling our names
Maybe now you can't hear them, but you will ha
if you just, take hold of my hand

oh! But Are You Experienced?
Have you ever been experienced?

Not necessarily stoned, but beautiful........Jimi
gawd knows why i am into quoting tonite

(in reply to LATEXBABY64)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Age and BDSM - 9/14/2007 3:02:16 PM   
Kelika


Posts: 56
Joined: 4/25/2006
From: Cincinnati
Status: offline 		In all honesty, I like older men.  The man that truly got me thus far, my whole being, mind, body, heart, and soul was almost 30 years my senior!  Now, I had told him he was too old in the beginning when he contacted me (and it wasn't through this site), but his reply back to me was just as curteous as mine was in the rejection and I asked him if we could be friends.  I explained that I could always use good male influence in my life.  He wrote emails on things I wrote in my blog, we would talk through them back and forth and I swear, he just -got- me.  He understood and I need to be nutured as much as he wanted to nurture. 

It wasn't just a Daddy Dom/babygirl thing...it was everything..Dom/sub, Master/slave, I could be everything in me and he understood it from his years of wisdom.  I asked him if I was too late for him to consider and thus it began.  He wasn't honest with something though...he wasn't free to claim me and therefore it sits in my mind as now understanding what it is I need and want.  I was never more slavish then I was with him...never.  I didn't care about the age.

For me, I accepted that fact that because he took the time to know -me-, not the kink with me, he was special and I would be giving up the opportunity of a lifetime if I did not take that risk.  Sure, there were concerns, health things to think about...but honestly.  I would rather love and lost than to never love at all.

I pose this question to you Prinsexx, in you wondering if you should worry or perhaps maybe take this risk.  (As a side note, I am not religious, but spiritual so please take it in whatever form makes you feel comfortable).

If God came to you and told you that He has this most breathtaking gift to give to you. This precious gift would bring you unimaginable joy and happiness…something you could never imagine, but…you could only have this gift for a very short time, and its departure would bring you great pain and sorrow…
…would you accept this gift?

Well wishes,
Kelika




_____________________________

I, with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage or my toughness, who does not believe me naïve or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman. ~ Anais Nin

(in reply to Prinsexx)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Age and BDSM - 9/14/2007 3:04:07 PM   
SusanofO


Posts: 5672
Joined: 12/19/2005
Status: offline 		Gosh, just have fun!! Congratulations!

- Susan

_____________________________

"Hope is the thing with feathers,
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

(in reply to Kelika)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Age and BDSM - 9/14/2007 3:25:33 PM   
misscupcake


Posts: 14
Joined: 5/30/2007
Status: offline
I am 22.. and I used to think that most (emphasis on the MOST) men my age or younger just didn't understand my needs outside of "if i do this, i get some". I had an aversion to talking to younger men...yet I also had an aversion to those much older than me. The first person I met in the scene ended up being about my father's age....Granted it is a casual "educational" type friendship, but still. I finally decided to keep an open mind and because of that I have met some amazing friends, regardless of age.
xoxo
cupcake

(in reply to Kelika)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Age and BDSM - 9/14/2007 3:31:37 PM   
Stephann


Posts: 4214
Joined: 12/27/2006
From: Portland, OR
Status: offline 		I'll offer the kindest advice I can.

Take

it

slow.

Enjoy him for all he's worth, and if he's around in six months or a year, then maybe you have a winner.  Until then...

Take

it

slow.

I've tried relationships with age differences far less than what you are experiencing, and eventually found that the differences were subtle, but powerful.  I was 22 when I dated a 35 year old woman with a 17 year old daughter.  I had a great deal more in common with her than the daughter, but the age difference of 13 years was...striking.  I recently dated a woman who was 20, and I am now 30.  Again, the age difference left us with very little in common.

Take

it

slow.

And enjoy the ride.  Don't worry what might come; just let it come.

Stephan


_____________________________

Nosce Te Ipsum

"The blade itself incites to violence" - Homer

Men: Find a Woman here

(in reply to Prinsexx)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Age and bdsm - 9/14/2007 3:54:50 PM   
breatheasone


Posts: 4004
Joined: 7/14/2007
Status: offline 		Seriously...just go for it....

_____________________________

Romans 10:13,For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.
Mike posts in black font
candy posts in pink font

(in reply to Prinsexx)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Age and bdsm - 9/14/2007 5:47:31 PM   
SirCache


Posts: 159
Joined: 3/26/2005
Status: offline 		If he has no problems with it, then embrace the opportunity!  I had a sub who was almost 20 years my junior, and it was quite wonderful.  Avail yourself of the chance, because come on, you only live once.  And if he makes you this happy, you have to follow where it will lead.

(in reply to Prinsexx)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Age and bdsm - 9/14/2007 6:00:54 PM   
SageFemmexx


Posts: 240
Joined: 1/2/2007
Status: offline 		My dominant husband is fifteen years younger than I am. But, we have a great deal in common that we discovered from years of talking online in Gorean chatrooms. Our difference in ages has been to his advantage--I have grandchildren, his children are still in their teens. I can speak at length of what it's like to raise kids at various ages and also what it's like when they go off to college and marry. He appreciates my experience and perspective--not only on children but on exes.

I appreciate the fact that he is younger, he is still at the age where everything works without little blue pills. He also keeps me thinking in terms of a younger generation and mindset--along with learning to appreciate his musical tastes. I like the Beatles, he likes Styx. I like sushi--he won't go near "bait". Hehe

Enjoy, all of life is an adventure.

(in reply to SirCache)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Age and BDSM - 9/14/2007 6:32:26 PM   
slaveluci


Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Stephann
I've tried relationships with age differences far less than what you are experiencing, and eventually found that the differences were subtle, but powerful.  I was 22 when I dated a 35 year old woman with a 17 year old daughter.  I had a great deal more in common with her than the daughter, but the age difference of 13 years was...striking.  I recently dated a woman who was 20, and I am now 30.  Again, the age difference left us with very little in common

And I, on the other hand, have had the opposite experience.  Master is going to be 61 in a couple weeks and I just turned 35 a couple of months back.  I have always been interested in, attracted to, and in relationships with older men but I have never had such a connection or so much in common with anyone as I do with Him.  It is amazing to me that we seem to have more in common than I do with people closer to my own age, even females.  So, it is very possible to find a beautiful bond with someone much older and/or younger than oneself.  As Stephann pointed out in the quote above, it often does not work out well.  But, for us, it couldn't be any better.  As he said, "take it slow" and (I'll add) believe that it can indeed work.  Congrats.............luci

< Message edited by slaveluci -- 9/14/2007 6:37:27 PM >

_____________________________

To choose a good book, look in an inquisitor’s prohibited list. ~John Aikin

(in reply to Stephann)
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