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Lying to a master - 9/14/2007 9:52:26 PM

slavekittycat

Posts: 1
Joined: 9/14/2007
Status: offline

Good evening. I am new to this whole scene and I just wanted to know if there is a way to get back a master that has dismissed you? I did not know going into this lifesytle that truth was very important. Well as a new I messed up and lied to the master I was with. He dismissed me and I would give anything to have another chance with him. does anyone have any suggestions?

Post #: 1

RE: Lying to a master - 9/14/2007 10:02:27 PM

breatheasone

Posts: 4004
Joined: 7/14/2007
Status: offline

Ok...i read this, and left cause i was gonna try not to say it...BUT....what do you mean " I did not know going into this lifesytle that truth was very important. " What lifestyle do you live where its not?

_____________________________

Romans 10:13,For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.
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(in reply to slavekittycat)

Post #: 2

RE: Lying to a master - 9/14/2007 10:03:03 PM

RRafe

Posts: 2060
Joined: 8/29/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: slavekittycat

Good evening. I am new to this whole scene and I just wanted to know if there is a way to get back a master that has dismissed you? I did not know going into this lifesytle that truth was very important. Well as a new I messed up and lied to the master I was with. He dismissed me and I would give anything to have another chance with him. does anyone have any suggestions?

He withdrew his influence.

It's totally up to him now.

_____________________________

I seem to be some wierd combination of Ren and Stimpy

(in reply to slavekittycat)

Post #: 3

RE: Lying to a master - 9/14/2007 10:08:28 PM

LivingInSin

Posts: 326
Joined: 6/12/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: RRafe

quote:

ORIGINAL: slavekittycat

Good evening. I am new to this whole scene and I just wanted to know if there is a way to get back a master that has dismissed you? I did not know going into this lifesytle that truth was very important. Well as a new I messed up and lied to the master I was with. He dismissed me and I would give anything to have another chance with him. does anyone have any suggestions?

He withdrew his influence.

It's totally up to him now.

oh ya. screwed the pooch good with that one. <----no offense to doggie lovers.

_____________________________

*Instead of complaining that rose bushes have thorns, rejoice that thorn bushes bloom*

*Myth says that only the woman who has been an utter slave can be truly free------this is no myth*

(in reply to RRafe)

Post #: 4

RE: Lying to a master - 9/14/2007 10:09:27 PM

Tinman1960

Posts: 46
Joined: 5/19/2007
Status: offline

Go to him. Tell him what you have said here and perhaps even beg for forgiveness with sincerity. If he does not take you back - take this lession into any future relationships you mght have - honesty is always best.

(in reply to slavekittycat)

Post #: 5

RE: Lying to a master - 9/14/2007 10:17:11 PM

RRafe

Posts: 2060
Joined: 8/29/2007
Status: offline

It really depends on how much of a hard nose he is.

Someone who got dismissed for lying to me would have to go through hell to atone. Even then, I'd take anything she said with a grain of salt. Never shit where you sleep.

_____________________________

I seem to be some wierd combination of Ren and Stimpy

(in reply to Tinman1960)

Post #: 6

RE: Lying to a master - 9/14/2007 10:19:36 PM

georgejames68

Posts: 72
Joined: 1/28/2006
Status: offline

Which world do you live on that honesty isn't important????? You have to be an extreme newbie and never have read any of the posts here. It has been said and repeated so mant times that honesty is terribly important!!!

I repeat, what in hell world do you live on anyway? George

(in reply to slavekittycat)

Post #: 7

RE: Lying to a master - 9/14/2007 10:20:04 PM

Shadowen

Posts: 34
Joined: 8/31/2007
Status: offline

Dishonesty in any form is enough to make me distance myself from anyone, no matter who they are. Thankfully I really don't see most people as being as stringent in that regard as me. As has been suggested already most I can say is apologize, be sincere and explain (not excuse) your actions. Depending on the severity of it, which I don't know, that may or may not help. Either way have to be able to accept the consequences of your own actions.

(in reply to Tinman1960)

Post #: 8

RE: Lying to a master - 9/14/2007 10:29:24 PM

MissMagnolia

Posts: 3636
Status: offline

You didn't know that honesty was required?

For once, I'm gobsmacked. (alert the media and mark it on your calendar!!

).

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Resident Whip Cracker AND Resident Orbs Of Joy.

(in reply to Shadowen)

Post #: 9

RE: Lying to a master - 9/14/2007 11:19:02 PM

Absolom

Posts: 13
Joined: 9/13/2007
Status: offline

Let me see if I understand you. You lied to you own master? You lied to the one who owns you in a relationship? I had a slave lie to me. I gave her hell for it. I certainly hope if he takes you back, he disciplines you severly. Otherwise like we all said, take it as a lesson and move on

(in reply to MissMagnolia)

Post #: 10

RE: Lying to a master - 9/15/2007 3:26:10 AM

chellekitty

Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline

well obviously you lied about something serious enough to get you dismissed...this wasn't a "dinner will be on the table at 6:30" and it was on the table at 6:45 kind of lie...so...umm...suck it up, learn from your experience...if, when he has calmed down, he returns to talk to you, take it slow and tell him you realize what you did was wrong and ask for guidance...otherwise...move on...don't bug him...its really sad and painful to watch...i know...i am doing it right now with someone i know....

_____________________________

One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer

(in reply to slavekittycat)

Post #: 11

RE: Lying to a master - 9/15/2007 3:34:58 AM

Absolutemaster

Posts: 79
Joined: 9/27/2005
Status: offline

For someone to have looked for, encountered, talked to and formed a relationship with a Dominant, and entered into a Master/slave arrangement with them, then done something wrong and lost that relationship again, and still remain "new to the whole scene" is pretty good going.

I note the OP only joined the site today...

(in reply to slavekittycat)

Post #: 12

RE: Lying to a master - 9/15/2007 5:02:31 AM

Babybass

Posts: 230
Joined: 7/30/2007
Status: offline

What jumps out at me was that you didn't realise honesty was a big issue! Have been on this planet long? Had any interactions with real people!!!
Try and apologise - He may not want to hear it - but that is His decision - and as chellekitty said you may have to just suck it up! Tough lesson - but you may need to learn it!

_____________________________

"To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best day and night to make you like everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight and never stop fighting" - e e cummings

(in reply to chellekitty)

Post #: 13

RE: Lying to a master - 9/15/2007 5:11:37 AM

Squeakers

Posts: 489
Joined: 10/3/2006
Status: offline

Was this Master online or real time? What was the lie? How long have you been in this lifestyle to not know that honesty was pretty important?

(in reply to slavekittycat)

Post #: 14

RE: Lying to a master - 9/15/2007 5:19:25 AM

mmb1

Posts: 304
Joined: 8/3/2007
Status: offline

agrees with Squeakers, can we have more info please?

(in reply to Squeakers)

Post #: 15

RE: Lying to a master - 9/15/2007 5:23:23 AM

Focus50

Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: slavekittycat

Good evening. I am new to this whole scene and I just wanted to know if there is a way to get back a master that has dismissed you? I did not know going into this lifesytle that truth was very important. Well as a new I messed up and lied to the master I was with. He dismissed me and I would give anything to have another chance with him. does anyone have any suggestions?

Crikey, don'tcha love it when you give people the chance to hog the moral high ground! Everybody tells lies at some stage; the real sin (apparently) is being honest about it. It would seem to me that either the OP told a real whopper or her master was one of those lifestyle saints who preaches what he can't possibly have practised all his life....

The gravity of the particular lie is significant, IMO. As is whether the OP was caught out cold or voluntarily owned up. It's also significant of how well the relationship was travelling in general - ie, the lie was an opportune moment to end it (and also claiming the moral high ground as a bonus).

To the OP:
If it was only a "small" lie, would you really want someone back who'd give you a life sentence for it? If it was a whopper, then move on and learn the lesson. To summarise; everyone tells lies, no-one likes being lied to! If anything, the "lifestyle" has an unfortunate but deserved reputation for lies and deceit; we've probably all been burnt at some stage.

Lies hurt but we can often forgive those we care for..... But all you got was "dismissed"! Can't help thinking it wasn't the lie so much as a last straw for your relationship. My advice is to let this one go.

Focus.

(in reply to slavekittycat)

Post #: 16

RE: Lying to a master - 9/15/2007 5:52:08 AM

SirEbonyPhoenix

Posts: 195
Joined: 8/29/2006
From: My realm in Central Indiana (you guess where :P)
Status: offline

As I am reading this topic, I have a personal philoosphy about lying which can be summed up in this familar adage:"Fool me once, shame on me. Fool me twice, shame on you." But I also believe that getting back at a Master or slave is only going to bring about nothing but misery for the one who dismissed or was dismissed, so the best thing to do is let them go and move on. And that's my $7.50 on this topic. (Sorry, but inflation keeps rising! LMAO)

_____________________________

"If it takes one to know one, then you must be one."

(in reply to Focus50)

Post #: 17

RE: Lying to a master - 9/15/2007 6:08:11 AM

kikinymph

Posts: 40
Joined: 8/19/2007
Status: offline

Holy macaroli!!! --not a Domly one.. but taking a shot at this...

Being new to any lifestyle does not excuse lying. And then, if you couple the fact that this particular lifestyle does have the potential for physical harm (said in a general sense), let alone intensity factors. If you are not willing to be honest about what you want, or sometimes it is easier to be clear about what you do not want, or will not tolerate, then what makes you think anyone wants to put that kind of time and effort into you? I wouldn't want to put that kind of time and effort into serving my owner if he wasn't willing to be honest with me.

Without Honesty there can be no Trust. No integrity. Love is but the lube that allows the wheels and cogs to turn in the relationship; Honesty and Trust are two MAJOR cogs and wheels.

_____________________________

"That which yields is not always weak." Kushiel series by Jacqueline Carey

(in reply to slavekittycat)

Post #: 18

RE: Lying to a master - 9/15/2007 6:19:18 AM

eyesopened

Posts: 2798
Joined: 6/12/2006
From: Tampa, FL
Status: offline

Truth is important. Period. In any lifestyle. In your dealings with other people but also when dealing only with yourself.

While yes, all of us have lied, fibbed, fabricated or embellished at one time or another the motive behind the lie is paramount. If the lie was, for example, motivated by a willful act, that, in my opinion would be worse than claiming aquamarine as your favorite color because blue sounds too boring.

A broken object can be glued but is never the same as before it was broken and that applies also to trust.

_____________________________

Proudly owned by InkedMaster. He is the one i obey, serve, honor and love.

No one is honored for what they've received. Honor is the reward for what has been given.

(in reply to slavekittycat)

Post #: 19

RE: Lying to a master - 9/15/2007 7:01:49 AM

corsetgirl

Posts: 824
Joined: 5/22/2004
Status: offline

I have been with only three serious doms. The first ex-dom passed an ugly rumor about me, which was a total lie and he was called on it! I no longer have any contact with him.

I am on still good terms with the last two ex-doms because they are honest with me. Sometimes, I did not like what they were telling me but I have never dismissed them from my life.

As Focus says, you might have little white lies but the whoppers are the deal breakers for me. I may lie to others who do not know me but I will never lie to my dom.

(in reply to eyesopened)

Post #: 20

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