subcheryl
Posts: 280
Joined: 11/2/2004
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quote:
ORIGINAL: sabis
i was very much an ugly duckling growing up - to the extent that "(sabis) likes you!" was one of the main insults thrown on the school bus for years. As a young girl / teen, i never spent time learning to style my hair, or to put on makeup, because it would have been pretty pointless, and a family member even told me so rather bluntly. My mother was very much the bohemian hippy type, and never encouraged me to do any of those things, either. i always dressed very conservatively to try and avoid notice, hiding as much of myself as possible behind mousey hair and big glasses... except for a brief rebellious period in my late teens, when i ran away from home and became an art model. [How i found the guts to do so, i'm not sure, except for the encouragement i got from my girlfriend at the time. That was the first time in my life i felt good about the way i looked: the positive reinforcement i got from her and the artists who were painting me.]
Even still, after nearly 20 years, i've worn unisex clothes, avoided makeup / nail polish / etc and never really been confident with how to compliment my figure with fashion or cosmetics or hairstyle.
These days, i'm slowly learning how to dress and look 'girlie,' because that is what pleases Master. He loves the slightly trashy, sexpot look; very styled hair, defined makeup, revealing clothing. He likes to have me dress up for the local munches and gatherings. He also gets a very big kick out of seeing other men lust after what belongs to Him. i have found that the more feminine i can make my appearance, the more aware of His own masculinity He is. The more masculine He is feeling, the more He expresses His Dominance. The more He expresses his Dominance, the more submissive i feel. So it's a neat circle that builds upon itself. My confidence is slowly growing.
Maybe it's the gemini dichotomy in me, but there's still a lot of days i look in the mirror and wonder how on earth He finds me sexy when THAT is in the mirror. Then i just have to remind myself that there doesn't have to be a reason. He just does. He both tells and shows me so on a daily basis that i am what He wants, what He chose, what He married for now and always. i use that as my strength to shake myself out of the old 'ugly duckling' patterns of thinking.
Maybe some of the women at the munch that you saw and whom didn't meet your standards of grooming or clothing just hadn't gained the self-confidence to do so yet.
In His service,
~ sabis
I had pretty much the same experience as you growing up, only mine was a stepmom who raised 2 of her own girls and 2 step daughters before I came to be a teen and interested in boys or my looks, she did not allow makeup, shaving, wearing skirts above the knees this was in the 70's (mini skirts were the thing then) and jeans were unheard of. The summer of my 16th birthday spent the summer with a stepsister who taught me to shave the underarms and legs, boy did that feel good since I was particularly hairy. Makeup I have learned on my own, clothes I am learning to like girly things it started out with sexy underthings then lace on topes and now with master skirts or dress' his preference. But yes depends on what you consider to look like crap, cause even as a teen could only wash my hair once maybe twice a week, baths where once a week, I still washed and even tried babypowder trick between shampoos to take away the oily look of teen hair to make it appear fresh and clean if possible, so did make an effort with what was allowed, now take pride in self will wear makeup occasionally, and always try to appear clean and neat for master. But I have learned with dealing with younger girls my sons ages that the girls to some degree don't have a clue what iit is to take pride in the way they look and to me that is a testiment to moms who are just to busy to teach their girls how to be women. Many times I would have makeup parties for the teen girls with their mothers permissions to introduce them on how to wear makeup, for I beleive in the natural look being accentuated by just a touch of makeup, and most moms where rather pleased with the results, so as one poster put it perhaps have a makeup party invite the women of the club to it and help them learn.or take one or two of them under your wing and gently and slowly show them how to clean up to look the best they can with what money they have to work with, for some this is a factor, i know I am not working now and masters money goes for bills and occasionally clothes but I am making alot of my own due to it is cheaper. and I like to sew.
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