RE: Are you honest about your sexual past? (Full Version)

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AquaticSub -> RE: Are you honest about your sexual past? (9/16/2007 12:48:42 PM)

Assuming someone has a STD and using protection is the  safe way to go. It is what I did. But that doesn't change the fact that if they had to lie instead of just telling me that they don't want to disclose the number, I am going to think they are hiding something.

It doesn't have to be a STD. It could be that they just finished fucking my best friend and they know that would cause me to not fuck them.



AquaticSub -> RE: Are you honest about your sexual past? (9/16/2007 12:51:50 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Stephann
What I worry about, is her lying about her jealous ex boyfriend doesn't keep a glock in his truck.  If she's going to lie to me about STDs, I have no doubt she's going to lie about the boyfriend.  Frankly, I don't have the time or patience for that kind of drama.


 
Very good point! A very good friend of Valyraen and I nearly got in a LOT of trouble because a woman lied to him about her pyscho ex being out of her life. It was scary, to the point where this man had to told that we were going to call the police if we didn't hear that our friend had arrived home safely by a certain time.



came4U -> RE: Are you honest about your sexual past? (9/16/2007 12:52:21 PM)

Why are men called players?? Because they don't fall for you?

Then a gal fuks another guy while complaining about the player...he holds her after the fukfest, she falls for him, now he is a player LOL.

problem solved: Don't fuk or Don't fuk to fall in love every week. so darn simple.



xoxi -> RE: Are you honest about your sexual past? (9/16/2007 12:55:21 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Stephan

shoshi,

Why answer it at all?  You could just say "Well, I don't really know you well enough to want to share my sexual history with you."  If you're viewing him as boyfriend material, you don't need to put all your cards on the table.  I'd have a lot more respect for "my privacy is just that, until we've earned each other's trust" a lot more, than a woman who says "two" when it's closer to two hundred.  For me, two hundred means she has a lot better chance of becoming girlfriend material, than one night stand material.  It means she's not going to fall in love with my cock. 



I don't know...LOL...I guess that would make more sense.  I'm just afraid of them thinking something horrible.  And sometimes I meet guys who have been with like 5 women...I've been with more than 5 men but I really don't want them to think I'm a slut who doesn't value love and commitment for having slept with twice as many people as they have.  Because I do...I've just learned that the hard way.  So it's easier to condense all my one night stands into one person and say the actual number plus one.

I guess it's hard because you can't change the past, and the number just keeps getting higher as you go along.  And despite people saying "it doesn't matter" people DO judge you for it.  Some thing it's hot, some think it 's trashy, some have been with 60 women so as long as you're lower than they are it's all good.

quote:



To ditch barflies, btw, why not just tell him "so thanks for the drink, have a good night, buh bye"

Stephan



Because it's so much fun to make them feel stupid for assuming I would go home with them.  If I did that they would just think "wow what a bitch" but if I said I was a virgin they would think "huh...I guess not every woman wants strange cock."



defiantbadgirl -> RE: Are you honest about your sexual past? (9/16/2007 12:56:50 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

Are those men really worth having anyway?


Not if one lives in an area where they can find a decent guy that isn't this way. Not everyone is that lucky. In my area, most guys that have their shit together (not necessarily rich, but with a job......even if it's fast food and their own transportation) are like this. Bums that are looking for a free ride are the ones that don't seem to care.



celticlord2112 -> RE: Are you honest about your sexual past? (9/16/2007 12:58:23 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

quote:

ORIGINAL: came4U
Lying is for the temporary.  Truth is for the keepers. Sorry, to burst any male-ego self-importance bubbles.


That makes no sense to me. When I have a one-night stand and someone lies to me, that just makes me think they have a STD. If you don't want to tell them the truth, just tell them you aren't comfortable.


I don't get it either.  I don't care if a woman has had one previous lover or one hundred.  I care about what's in her heart and in her head, not the number of hands that have been in her panties.



AquaticSub -> RE: Are you honest about your sexual past? (9/16/2007 12:59:23 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: defiantbadgirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

Are those men really worth having anyway?


Not if one lives in an area where they can find a decent guy that isn't this way. Not everyone is that lucky. In my area, most guys that have their shit together (not necessarily rich, but with a job......even if it's fast food and their own transportation) are like this. Bums that are looking for a free ride are the ones that don't seem to care.


So it's move or lower your standards?

Hate to be a bitch, but I'd move.



came4U -> RE: Are you honest about your sexual past? (9/16/2007 1:00:11 PM)

If I had 358 men in my lifetime, would that be a lie? or would it be truth?

What would a man think about that?

Would it matter?

Why would it be important? (lets leave out std's on this hypothetical).

What is the truth guys?  Would you not feel 'speshul' because 300ish others thought they were speshul???




xoxi -> RE: Are you honest about your sexual past? (9/16/2007 1:01:59 PM)

 
quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

But that doesn't change the fact that if they had to lie instead of just telling me that they don't want to disclose the number, I am going to think they are hiding something.


I would think the opposite...if someone said "I don't want to say" I would think they had something to hide because they were, well, hiding it.  I'm not saying to say two when it's twenty, or twenty when it's two hundred, but 'nine' honestly sounds far better than 'eleven' - it's still single digits and it gets the point across.

You know...this question should be answered in a range.  There should be categories:
virgin
1-5
5-15
16-30
31-50
50-100
100-200
and so forth.

Would make life so much easier [:)]



AquaticSub -> RE: Are you honest about your sexual past? (9/16/2007 1:03:10 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: came4U

What is the truth guys?  Would you not feel 'speshul' because 300ish others thought they were speshul???



Valyraen's answer:

"Are you clean? Good. Learned anything from the experience? Good. I don't fucking care."



mmb1 -> RE: Are you honest about your sexual past? (9/16/2007 1:03:41 PM)

I do not feel the need to discuss my past even if sexual or not with anyone but who i choose to and trust.



defiantbadgirl -> RE: Are you honest about your sexual past? (9/16/2007 1:03:59 PM)

Exactly. Tell a man you don't want to say and most of them will think the worst.



AquaticSub -> RE: Are you honest about your sexual past? (9/16/2007 1:05:12 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: xoxi

I would think the opposite...if someone said "I don't want to say" I would think they had something to hide because they were, well, hiding it.  I'm not saying to say two when it's twenty, or twenty when it's two hundred, but 'nine' honestly sounds far better than 'eleven' - it's still single digits and it gets the point across.

You know...this question should be answered in a range.  There should be categories:
virgin
1-5
5-15
16-30
31-50
50-100
100-200
and so forth.

Would make life so much easier [:)]



To me saying that you don't want to say is at least being honest and I can respect that. I'm going to get you tested before I go there, but I will still go there.

Athough, I have to say, I'd rather give my actual number than say what bracket I'm in! *Grins* There is a lot of difference between 16 and 30 after all. [;)]



mmb1 -> RE: Are you honest about your sexual past? (9/16/2007 1:06:05 PM)

No, I tell who I wish to tell is what i meant, about my sexual past as well as personal past, and only share with those I trust..........it would not be displayed here lol.



mmb1 -> RE: Are you honest about your sexual past? (9/16/2007 1:07:19 PM)

well I don't go for tests but I am still falling into that first category of your "test" lol.  I don't believe in sharing certain things, that is just the way I am.



came4U -> RE: Are you honest about your sexual past? (9/16/2007 1:07:22 PM)

It is all about competition.

If a man had 400 women, I would have to be a better lay to keep a man who had that many.  Same with men who are dating a gal who had 400 men.  They would feel lesser of a lover.

This is such a vanilla discussion.

In lifestyle, I would be a different story.  I would prefer to be virgin whipped, virgin tied for a man.  His experience would upset me in this regard. Lying? No, I wouldn't want him to lie, I would want to know his bdsm experience so I can judge how I would 'feel' as the 50th submissive under his rule.  I most likely would decline his dominance.



xoxi -> RE: Are you honest about your sexual past? (9/16/2007 1:08:53 PM)

Actually, having thought about this while reading the thread, I don't think I'm going to lie anymore.  I will still say "x but only y counted" to a boyfriend because that's even more honest IMO since it's differentiating between sex I enjoyed and stupid mistakes, but I'm not going to say a fake number to a guy.

"You do not know me well enough to be asking me that question, mister" will be my new standard answer.  At least it will get across the point that I consider sex to be intimate and important, and I can say it all flirty like instead of coming off as rude or like I have something to hide.

Thx thread you have changed my life [:)]



mmb1 -> RE: Are you honest about your sexual past? (9/16/2007 1:09:50 PM)

I would only reveal my past anything to my Dom, unless it helps others and i feel it is ok to discuss, but otherwise, i believe there are things that are private and that is a good thing :)



mmb1 -> RE: Are you honest about your sexual past? (9/16/2007 1:11:02 PM)

xoxi- you give out a lot more info than I would but I respect that :)



AquaticSub -> RE: Are you honest about your sexual past? (9/16/2007 1:12:17 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: came4U

It is all about competition.

If you feel you are in competition, I'd like to know who you think you are competing against.
quote:



If a man had 400 women, I would have to be a better lay to keep a man who had that many. 

No matter how many partners a man has had, men who put a value on sex are not going to stay with a dead lay who isn't trying to improve themselves.
quote:


Same with men who are dating a gal who had 400 men.  They would feel lesser of a lover.

The insecure ones would.
quote:


This is such a vanilla discussion.

And we are above such things? The things that trouble vanillas do not trouble us? We are exempt from these discussions, they have no place in our lives?

Edited for millions of typos again [:'(]



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