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No sex Master's - 9/20/2007 6:36:14 AM   
exquisitefeline1


Posts: 69
Joined: 9/13/2007
Status: offline 		I would like to know if it is common to find Masters or Dominants willing to be a Dominant figure in a subs life without sex being involved? In a D/s relationship there is far more that is involved than sex, so therefore it is understandable that it is not always the focus of a D/s relationship. How much of Domination is revolved around sexual play, or, contradictory, are there many Dominants that just like to live out their Dominant nature without sex. (and i dont mean their general Dominant persona, i realize there are clearly Dominant personalities.)
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: No sex Master's - 9/20/2007 6:39:25 AM   
Celeste43


Posts: 3066
Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
Status: offline 		There are some. I think it's more common in F/m relationships though. However I have heard of gay male doms with straight female subs. And honestly, if you want to remove the sexual component, you would do better to find a dom/me that is not of your preferred sexual type.

(in reply to exquisitefeline1)
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RE: No sex Master's - 9/20/2007 9:01:28 AM   
toservez


Posts: 1733
Joined: 9/7/2006
From: All over now in Minnesota
Status: offline 		Sex is a human drive that is different in each and every one of us. Some need a lot of sex, some need none at all and most of us are somewhere in between. D/s can be primarily about sex to someone, not about sex at all or for most it depends on the situation or relationship.

In a D/s relationship sex or no sex is not determined by the D/s purely by itself but whether the sexual drive is being filled. Obviously if you are in a one on one relationship then both people’s sexual needs must fit together. If in a relationship that neither are relying in their sexual needs to be met then certainly you can find people who can and want to fulfill their D/s needs without sex entering the equation.


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(in reply to exquisitefeline1)
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RE: No sex Master's - 9/20/2007 9:23:38 AM   
breatheasone


Posts: 4004
Joined: 7/14/2007
Status: offline 		Yes...there are just about EVERY combination of relationship dynamics possible in this lifestyle.

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(in reply to exquisitefeline1)
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RE: No sex Master's - 9/20/2007 10:41:06 AM   
SirCache


Posts: 159
Joined: 3/26/2005
Status: offline 		It depends for me.  There is certainly a sexual componant in the relationships I have, but that doesn't necessarily mean that I desire or require sexual activity for every scene.  Indeed--there are some scenes I've had where I would certainly classify it as sexy, with nudity, but no sexual contact whatsoever.  I guess it depends on the person, the situation, and the expectations of those involved.

(in reply to exquisitefeline1)
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RE: No sex Master's - 9/20/2007 11:54:45 AM   
iammachine


Posts: 1549
Joined: 1/25/2006
Status: offline 		In short, yes. There are dynamics to fit every person, it's just a matter of finding someone compatible enough with what you are seeking and negotiating.

Good luck!


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(in reply to exquisitefeline1)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: No sex Master's - 9/20/2007 2:28:00 PM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline 		yes it is possible to be in a no-sex D/s relationship. Daddy and i have a no-sex Daddydaughter dynamic and i have no complaints about it either. i don't need the actual physical contact or sex to feel complete with Him. our relationship is very loving, caring and nurturing ...plus there are other ways of being intimate

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(in reply to exquisitefeline1)
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RE: No sex Master's - 9/20/2007 2:56:12 PM   
LittleWolvenOne


Posts: 42
Joined: 3/23/2007
Status: offline 		For many mono masters (or mistresses) who plan on having one and only one partner or relationship, sex and sexual compatibility will be more important. This is because they only have one partner who is a potential source of sexual pleasure and connection. In general, it has been my personal observation that the more involvement and commitment that some one is looking for, the more they are likely to include sex as an expectation. This has my my observation of many male doms.

When you (a femsub) say sex, I am interpreting this as heterosexual anal/oral/vaginal. Many dominants have people they mentor, train and play with casually, that they don't own. Those relationships don't usually involve sex as defined above. Many people engage in bdsm play that is very erotic and sensual that also doesn't involve sex as defined above. For many people, BDSM play is a very sensual and intense exchange of energy that replaces sex in thier life.

A poly master (mistress) has the potential for more than one partner and may have one submissive who is more service and submission orriented and one submissive who is more sex and play orriented. In a poly orriented relationship, the primary is usually a sexual partner and secondaries some times have more sexual limits than the primary relationship.

This is one way that is popular in polyamoury. Every ones way of doing poly is different, just every persons way of doing mono is different..

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(in reply to exquisitefeline1)
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RE: No sex Master's - 9/20/2007 4:14:35 PM   
Rule


Posts: 10479
Joined: 12/5/2005
Status: offline 		I am afraid to touch someone as I have a highly contagious herpes virus. I have several reasons not to speak to girls that are interested in me, but having herpes is one of the most important of those. On the other hand I am not that dominant. (Though last Wednesday evening a girl did irritate me sufficiently to nearly cause me to command her. I wish I had done so, for how silly could I possibly have looked?)

(in reply to exquisitefeline1)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: No sex Master's - 9/20/2007 6:04:58 PM   
Cyntilating


Posts: 581
Joined: 6/19/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: breatheasone

Yes...there are just about EVERY combination of relationship dynamics possible in this lifestyle.


agreed : )

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Cyndi

.."There are two ways of spreading light: to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it. " Edith Wharton

(in reply to breatheasone)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: No sex Master's - 9/20/2007 8:49:51 PM   
slaverosebeauty


Posts: 1941
Joined: 12/12/2004
From: Cali
Status: offline 		I have been in relationships where sex was NOT involved, one was when I was beign formally trained a few years ago. Not a big deal, its just how our relationship was. It wasn't a romantic relationship by any means it was what it was. Now, I prefer to be trained by the Master I am with and have a sexual relationship with Him. I have friends who have NEVER had any sort of sexual realtionship with their Masters or Mistresses yet they have VERY strong relationships.

Now, I prefer to have sex with my Master, who is also the one who trains me, works out better for me in the logn run, I need that connection with one Man; and I have it.  

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(in reply to Cyntilating)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: No sex Master's - 9/22/2007 8:30:48 AM   
sirguym


Posts: 318
Joined: 8/10/2007
Status: offline 		Yes, I have done that with male subs; I am not at all interested in sex with men, but I am interested in using male ponies, or seeing to schoolboys or having office-boys, etc.

(in reply to slaverosebeauty)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: No sex Master's - 9/22/2007 12:48:01 PM   
Focus50


Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
Status: offline 		Very interesting question....
 
I would consider a relationship literally without sexual intercourse itself but not without sexual activity.  That's because the majority of my preferred forms of play involve only the girl being naked and sexually accessible etc and to generally accentuate her vulnerability and helplessness.
 
Sex is not so important to me in a relationship but finding different ways of teasing/tormenting the girl sexually and within a Dominant/submissive atmosphere is what I personally enjoy most.
 
Focus.

(in reply to exquisitefeline1)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: No sex Master's - 9/22/2007 6:23:10 PM   
SexyBlackMan2


Posts: 108
Status: offline 		It depends on the context of the relationship you have established.

(in reply to exquisitefeline1)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: No sex Master's - 9/22/2007 6:59:02 PM   
defiantbadgirl


Posts: 2988
Joined: 11/14/2005
Status: offline 		Have you tried kinkychristians.com? There are christian men out there who enjoy d/s but are against sex outside of marriage.

_____________________________


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(in reply to exquisitefeline1)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: No sex Master's - 9/22/2007 7:18:07 PM   
Redandtreasure


Posts: 26
Joined: 10/21/2006
Status: offline 		Yes as a straight male Dom I have had many a wonderful submissive that I have not had sex with. I teach this lifestyle to any who wish to learn. It can be anything from a demo to full training. I have my slave and am very sexual with her when we play someof the time but this lifestyle is not about sex it is about growing and finding that part of you to make you whole. When I do a demo on speed flogging to the flight of the bumble bee nobody can see how I can keep up with the tempo but what few people asks is how can my wonderful slave take the pressure of that wonderful flogging. She had to train with me. I am mot about to cheat on her and she is not about to cheat on me so to do so we have to have trust in one another because we both love to teach so much and spread the joy of this lifestyle.     Some say find a gay Dom or a fem Dom I have found a fem Dom more sexual then a straight male dom more time then not. Have fun and play safe

(in reply to defiantbadgirl)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: No sex Master's - 9/22/2007 7:29:39 PM   
RRafe


Posts: 2060
Joined: 8/29/2007
Status: offline 		I've done lots of bondage scenes for the art. No sex was involved.  But that was for practice.........I'm not into control beyond that-I don't have time for it.

< Message edited by RRafe -- 9/22/2007 7:30:10 PM >

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(in reply to Redandtreasure)
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RE: No sex Master's - 9/22/2007 7:35:58 PM   
DarkDaddyZ


Posts: 805
Joined: 4/7/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: exquisitefeline1

I would like to know if it is common to find Masters or Dominants willing to be a Dominant figure in a subs life without sex being involved? In a D/s relationship there is far more that is involved than sex, so therefore it is understandable that it is not always the focus of a D/s relationship. How much of Domination is revolved around sexual play, or, contradictory, are there many Dominants that just like to live out their Dominant nature without sex. (and i dont mean their general Dominant persona, i realize there are clearly Dominant personalities.)


I have had slaves that I never had pentration with.  I had one for 2 and a half years before we had sex.


_____________________________

"Flirting is part of the job description." DJ Jesus (Lucy Daughter Of The Devil)

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(in reply to exquisitefeline1)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: No sex Master's - 9/22/2007 7:41:40 PM   
MistressGitana


Posts: 5
Joined: 9/4/2006
Status: offline 		No sex, ever.

(in reply to DarkDaddyZ)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: No sex Master's - 9/23/2007 12:16:30 AM   
MasterKalif


Posts: 648
Joined: 5/24/2004
Status: offline 		I am very sexual, therefore for me it would be boring or non-existant if this lifestyle was not intertwined with some sexual scenario in some form or another. I find it is a deeper connection when sex is involved, at least for me personally.

(in reply to MistressGitana)
Profile   Post #: 20
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