what do you say you are? (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion



Message


ophelialocke -> what do you say you are? (9/21/2007 3:33:51 PM)

OK this has probably been covered a bunch but I couldn't think of the right phrase to search for earlier posts...

For those in D/s or M/s relationships, what do you tell vanilla friends or family members you are to each other?

To be scientific and neutral, I won't give my own details on the matter [;)].




earthycouple -> RE: what do you say you are? (9/21/2007 3:40:18 PM)

*S* depends on who it is and what they ask.  I offer up little.  But if you ask, I'll tell.




LuckyAlbatross -> RE: what do you say you are? (9/21/2007 3:40:24 PM)

To family- "The one I'm in a relationship with" 

To friends- whatever applies, master, slave, toy, etc.




onmykneesb4Him -> RE: what do you say you are? (9/21/2007 3:44:03 PM)

We're married, so i just call Him my Husband. i've had a couple bad experiences, so if you're vanilla, you don't get to know.




BoiJen -> RE: what do you say you are? (9/21/2007 3:47:06 PM)

I tend to use the word "partner" as there is an emotional committment and financial ties...for those who get to know me well they just call Her K and ask me how the Lady in Charge is...my family..well my choosen family knows and my blood family I have little to say to to begin with so there's no worries there lol




gypsygrl -> RE: what do you say you are? (9/21/2007 3:50:30 PM)

quote:

For those in D/s or M/s relationships, what do you tell vanilla friends or family members you are to each other?


My family knows of my lifestyle and respect it so I just tell them the truth.  My Master has to be more discreet, and I'm not sure how they explain me.  They usually just introduce me by name, but I don't know if there's any backchannel conversation that I'm not privy to.  Master's married, so introducing me as his gf or partner isn't an option.




tricia -> RE: what do you say you are? (9/21/2007 3:50:55 PM)

I started out calling him the deliciously flawed, dominant man of my dreams.
 
Now i just call him - Sam.  Who is still the deliciously flawed, dominant man of my dreams.




DarkDaddyZ -> RE: what do you say you are? (9/21/2007 3:51:03 PM)

My family doesn't ask anymore LOL! I'm just the kinky one who's happy.




RumpusParable -> RE: what do you say you are? (9/21/2007 3:51:37 PM)

I just tell the truth without excess details:  That so-and-so is an acquaintance/friend/whatever applies outside of the power dynamic.  I introduce them like anyone else my family or friend didn't know. 

If my vanilla friends are the sort to becomfortable, I just introduce them as my sub/slave.




grlneedstolearn -> RE: what do you say you are? (9/21/2007 3:53:56 PM)

i don't tell them nothing. My parents and i had an argument over my choice of living and that was that. What stays in the bedroom between my Dom and myself, he's 20 years older than i am, stays there. He won't meet my parents anytime soon due to his age.




homedespot -> RE: what do you say you are? (9/21/2007 3:55:24 PM)

I mostly say slave...but I say it with a great big fat grin. I often find that simply telling the truth with a laugh a wink and a smile is the best way. People think..."oh there she goes again with that wacky sense of humour". It works very well...and I don't even have to lie.

He isn't My "partner" at least in the sense that normal people mean it. Once in a while I'll say "partner in crime". I'll never say boyfriend as he isn't My friend in the sense that normal people mean it. Oh...and signifigant or sometimes insignifigant other depending on the situation.

And don't start fighting with Me about the word normal either...ya'll know exactly what I mean.

J.




Prinsexx -> RE: what do you say you are? (9/21/2007 3:56:10 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: tricia

I started out calling him the deliciously flawed, dominant man of my dreams.
 
Now i just call him - Sam.  Who is still the deliciously flawed, dominant man of my dreams.


brilliant!




xoxi -> RE: what do you say you are? (9/21/2007 3:56:16 PM)

Fast Reply:

I'm single now, but when I was in D/s relationships I always called him my boyfriend.  Even to him.  He called me his girlfriend or girl, and in private I would call him my master, my god, my prince, my king, my owner...and he would call me his slave, his toy, his princess, his plaything, his property...but they were all just pet names.

It's actually a pet peeve of mine when someone asks to hear about my "ex Doms" or "ex Masters" - they were SO much more than just my 'Dom' or my "Master" - they were my boyfriends as well.  My partners.  Men I loved.  Even to lifestyle-aware people I use the term boyfriend because it is so much more comprehensive than Dom - Dom just describes one aspect of our relationship, but my boyfriend is someone who is my Dom, my Master, my Lover, my snugglebuddy...my everything.




Prinsexx -> RE: what do you say you are? (9/21/2007 3:57:52 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkDaddyZ

My family doesn't ask anymore LOL! I'm just the kinky one who's happy.


also brilliant post!




LuckyAlbatross -> RE: what do you say you are? (9/21/2007 3:59:39 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: grlneedstolearn
i don't tell them nothing. My parents and i had an argument over my choice of living and that was that. What stays in the bedroom between my Dom and myself, he's 20 years older than i am, stays there. He won't meet my parents anytime soon due to his age.

Actually it's YOUR age that's the problem.  If you were older and independent, it wouldn't matter.  I wasn't able to introduce my owners when I was younger either because my mother was not accepting of my choices in older men.

As soon as I got independent and stable- she either could choose to meet us both, or not meet at all.  Of course by then I'd trained her pretty well on accepting my choice for myself and she was a lot calmer.




chiaThePet -> RE: what do you say you are? (9/21/2007 4:04:45 PM)

For those whom find the courage to ask, i admit to being a submissive
personality who loves Powerful Women. i keep the Powerful Man
thing in my back pocket, seems to garner more raised eyebrows.

About that wooden box with the padlock in the corner, well, let's
just call that "none of your damn business".

chia* (the pet)




Prinsexx -> RE: what do you say you are? (9/21/2007 4:05:35 PM)

There's only been one person who has really, as far as I am concerned, called me mistress in the correct manner.
He is Dutch and I was doing my Domme thing on the phone.
He is a fluent English speaker and oh so very very sincere in his begging when he called me 'Missus'....a slight variation on Mistress....but nevertheless Mistress in an olde English way.

Likewise I prefer to call a Master 'Mister'......this is very very Old Guard actaully so Old Guard it should be termed pre Old Guard as it is based on probably the elder of D/s relationships which was based on upstairs/downstairs or the class system of England.

Calling Him Mister makes me feel GREAT and for those of you who care to re-start the trend....try calling you Mistresses Missus....and kneeling and bowing your heads and begging boys for all your worth.

Prinsexx




dollylima -> RE: what do you say you are? (9/21/2007 4:07:16 PM)

I used to call him "my boyfriend".
Now I call him "my fiance".
In a couple of months I will call him "My wonderful husband".
I only refer to him as "My Dom" with people I know as a result of their being kinksters.




thetammyjo -> RE: what do you say you are? (9/21/2007 4:27:16 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: ophelialocke

OK this has probably been covered a bunch but I couldn't think of the right phrase to search for earlier posts...

For those in D/s or M/s relationships, what do you tell vanilla friends or family members you are to each other?

To be scientific and neutral, I won't give my own details on the matter [;)].


If they are our friends, then they know that Tom and I are married and that I own Fox and consider him my slave. Out of concern for their feelings, he usually does not call me Mistress in front of them nor does he use my name either. He does not stop being my slave though when our friends are around. They can't handle it, they can stop coming over and hanging out.

Our families do not live near us so what they know is that Fox is a part of my family. One of my sisters knows that he and I are intimate but she has not asked for more details.

If for some reason we lived closer to any of our families of origin they too would be told that I own him and then they can make the choice to come over or not.




SeanPony -> RE: what do you say you are? (9/21/2007 4:31:10 PM)

I tell them I'm a pony with a big cock in a relationship.




Page: [1] 2   next >   >>

Valid CSS!




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy
0.03125