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Confused?? - 7/21/2005 10:10:44 AM   
dechala


Posts: 114
Joined: 2/20/2005
Status: offline 		My apologies if this is an overdone topic and i mean no offense or disrespect to anyone but this has been mulling around in my head for a few days now,ever since i've recently updated my profile.

Why am i now barraged with emails from Doms asking simply who owns me and if they may speak with Him?Why would you want to speak with Him?What would you have to talk about?He doesnt have a profile here so why would i give anyone such personal information?Has anyone else encountered this? Any ideas as to why?i'm still somewhat new to this lifestyle so is this a common thing?i have to admit i'm completely baffled by it

< Message edited by dechala -- 7/21/2005 10:22:11 AM >

_____________________________

dechala

"As soon we find a motel i'm gonna put my little honeybunny bride on the bed and tie her up.."
Natural Born Killers
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Confused?? - 7/21/2005 10:39:46 AM   
Davesgirl


Posts: 89
Joined: 5/13/2005
Status: offline 		LOL! Same thing happens to jsut about every sub/slave on here...

My oppinion? They want what they cant have. I've recieved my fair share of them, as well. I simply ask them what part of my profile confused them most, and that they have no need to speak with my Master. Most times it works. If it doesnt....Well... I have a tendancy to get a bit snide with them. That always works.

I'd say just ignore them. Eventually they'll go away. Dont let them bring you down, either. Theres a lot of great people on ehre. Just have to weed out the assholes first

(in reply to dechala)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Confused?? - 7/21/2005 11:06:26 AM   
plantlady64


Posts: 755
Joined: 5/19/2005
Status: offline 		Hello There,
I have just the opposite thing happening with me. In my profile I say my Master is Gunship and they can reach him here if they'd like to talk to him directly.
No only does no one send him messages about me, but when they ask to meet me in places other than the two options I'm permitted I refer them to my Master. They don't write him then either.

Funny huh? They ask to speak with your Master and prefer not to talk to mine even if it's requested.

Sincerely,
sub suzanne

(in reply to dechala)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Confused?? - 7/21/2005 11:25:14 AM   
dechala


Posts: 114
Joined: 2/20/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Davesgirl

LOL! Same thing happens to jsut about every sub/slave on here...

My oppinion? They want what they cant have. I've recieved my fair share of them, as well. I simply ask them what part of my profile confused them most, and that they have no need to speak with my Master. Most times it works. If it doesnt....Well... I have a tendancy to get a bit snide with them. That always works.

I'd say just ignore them. Eventually they'll go away. Dont let them bring you down, either. Theres a lot of great people on ehre. Just have to weed out the assholes first

Yes very good point.And i have indeed met many wonderful and friendly people here

_____________________________

dechala

"As soon we find a motel i'm gonna put my little honeybunny bride on the bed and tie her up.."
Natural Born Killers

(in reply to Davesgirl)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Confused?? - 7/21/2005 11:26:15 AM   
dechala


Posts: 114
Joined: 2/20/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: plantlady64

Hello There,
I have just the opposite thing happening with me. In my profile I say my Master is Gunship and they can reach him here if they'd like to talk to him directly.
No only does no one send him messages about me, but when they ask to meet me in places other than the two options I'm permitted I refer them to my Master. They don't write him then either.

Funny huh? They ask to speak with your Master and prefer not to talk to mine even if it's requested.



Sincerely,
sub suzanne

LOL that is odd

_____________________________

dechala

"As soon we find a motel i'm gonna put my little honeybunny bride on the bed and tie her up.."
Natural Born Killers

(in reply to plantlady64)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Confused?? - 7/21/2005 11:30:23 AM   
domtimothy46176


Posts: 670
Joined: 12/25/2004
From: Dayton, Ohio area
Status: offline 		My understanding is that it's generally considered rude to attempt to have a private conversation with an owned/collared submissive without first obtaining permission from her dominant/owner. This is what I was taught when I was new, what others have told me they were taught and what I teach new dominants who ask me for advice. I personally feel like it's common courtesy.

In addition, if someone has issues with my girl's behavior, I would be the one to address, not her. It would be extrememly offensive, IMO, to reprimand another's submissive/property. She might be operating under my orders and even were she not, I am ultimately responsible for ensuring that her behavior reflects positively on me.

Other reasons to contact a girl's dominant/owner also come readily to mind. If I'm particularly impressed with a girl, I might contact her master to compliment him on her training or even ask for advice. I might want to ask him where he found the outfit she's wearing, who did her tattoo or whether he made her collar himself. If her behavior reflects training that is indicative of my own personal values, perhaps I will contact her master in order to begin a friendly dialogue or extend a dinner invitation. These are but a few ideas that pop into my mind.

OTOH, I have never met a girl who refused to put me in contact with her master. Such a refusal would make me wonder if she was hiding her activities from her master or was otherwise afraid of being caught in unapproved behavior. One would think a girl who was striving to make her master proud would have no reason to hide her master's contact information from any who sought it. Perhaps there are other possibilities that haven't occurred to me.

Timothy

(in reply to dechala)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Confused?? - 7/21/2005 11:39:37 AM   
domtimothy46176


Posts: 670
Joined: 12/25/2004
From: Dayton, Ohio area
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Davesgirl

LOL! Same thing happens to jsut about every sub/slave on here...

My oppinion? They want what they cant have. I've recieved my fair share of them, as well. I simply ask them what part of my profile confused them most, and that they have no need to speak with my Master. Most times it works. If it doesnt....Well... I have a tendancy to get a bit snide with them. That always works.

I'd say just ignore them. Eventually they'll go away. Dont let them bring you down, either. Theres a lot of great people on ehre. Just have to weed out the assholes first


I looked at your profile and you mention that ~you~ seek advice on how to help your master understand your needs and desires. Yet, if someone contacts you and requests to speak with him directly, you tell them no. Is this per his instructions, or something you've taken upon yourself? I only ask because this is not something I've run across before. I can understand if he doesn't care to have contact with folks from here (although if that were the case I can't imagine why he would allow ~you~ on her either), but I can't imagine a situation where toy would presume to judge for herself who is or is not allowed to have contact with me.
Thanks,
Timothy

(in reply to Davesgirl)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Confused?? - 7/21/2005 11:41:04 AM   
dechala


Posts: 114
Joined: 2/20/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: domtimothy46176


OTOH, I have never met a girl who refused to put me in contact with her master. Such a refusal would make me wonder if she was hiding her activities from her master or was otherwise afraid of being caught in unapproved behavior. One would think a girl who was striving to make her master proud would have no reason to hide her master's contact information from any who sought it. Perhaps there are other possibilities that haven't occurred to me.

Timothy

i suppose but i just don't feel the need to give out anyone's personal details.Why would that make me suspect?i mean really what business is it of others for me to give out names and personal info?And then when i do finally give them(my Dom has oked it for me to give His email) then they never ever contact him.i understand your answer but aren't there just some things about a sub's life that should be at least somewhat personal? i sunno perhaps its just me

_____________________________

dechala

"As soon we find a motel i'm gonna put my little honeybunny bride on the bed and tie her up.."
Natural Born Killers

(in reply to domtimothy46176)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Confused?? - 7/21/2005 11:42:42 AM   
domtimothy46176


Posts: 670
Joined: 12/25/2004
From: Dayton, Ohio area
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: plantlady64

Hello There,
I have just the opposite thing happening with me. In my profile I say my Master is Gunship and they can reach him here if they'd like to talk to him directly.
No only does no one send him messages about me, but when they ask to meet me in places other than the two options I'm permitted I refer them to my Master. They don't write him then either.

Funny huh? They ask to speak with your Master and prefer not to talk to mine even if it's requested.

Sincerely,
sub suzanne


LOL, toy has had the same thing happen. Kind of makes you wonder why they contacted you in the first place, doesn't it? I chalk it up to horny clueless wannabes who have no understanding of what a committed relationship means.
Timothy

(in reply to plantlady64)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Confused?? - 7/21/2005 11:46:30 AM   
stormsfate


Posts: 849
Joined: 2/1/2005
Status: offline 		I've never had anyone ask to speak with my owner either...lol. Maybe you could tell the person asking for your owner's contact information that you would be happy to give him their contact information and if he chooses to speak with them, he will contact them directly.


f

(in reply to dechala)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Confused?? - 7/21/2005 11:46:31 AM   
dechala


Posts: 114
Joined: 2/20/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: domtimothy46176


quote:

ORIGINAL: plantlady64

Hello There,
I have just the opposite thing happening with me. In my profile I say my Master is Gunship and they can reach him here if they'd like to talk to him directly.
No only does no one send him messages about me, but when they ask to meet me in places other than the two options I'm permitted I refer them to my Master. They don't write him then either.

Funny huh? They ask to speak with your Master and prefer not to talk to mine even if it's requested.

Sincerely,
sub suzanne


LOL, toy has had the same thing happen. Kind of makes you wonder why they contacted you in the first place, doesn't it? I chalk it up to horny clueless wannabes who have no understanding of what a committed relationship means.
Timothy

Just out of curiosity why did you give me that answer? LOL

_____________________________

dechala

"As soon we find a motel i'm gonna put my little honeybunny bride on the bed and tie her up.."
Natural Born Killers

(in reply to domtimothy46176)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Confused?? - 7/21/2005 11:52:13 AM   
domtimothy46176


Posts: 670
Joined: 12/25/2004
From: Dayton, Ohio area
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: dechala

quote:

ORIGINAL: domtimothy46176


OTOH, I have never met a girl who refused to put me in contact with her master. Such a refusal would make me wonder if she was hiding her activities from her master or was otherwise afraid of being caught in unapproved behavior. One would think a girl who was striving to make her master proud would have no reason to hide her master's contact information from any who sought it. Perhaps there are other possibilities that haven't occurred to me.

Timothy

i suppose but i just don't feel the need to give out anyone's personal details.Why would that make me suspect?i mean really what business is it of others for me to give out names and personal info?And then when i do finally give them(my Dom has oked it for me to give His email) then they never ever contact him.i understand your answer but aren't there just some things about a sub's life that should be at least somewhat personal? i sunno perhaps its just me


Who's talking about personal details? [email protected] is hardly personal and has nothing to do with the personal details of your life. What does that have to do with the original post, where you asked why a dominant would want to contact your dom, or my answer giving various reasons. Giving out personal details to strangers was never addressed by either of us. I never even advocated giving out your master's e-mail addy without his express permission. While toy does have permission to hand out my e-mail address, I could just as easily have instructed her to notify querants that if they wished to speak with me to leave an e-mail addy and I would be in contact with them.
Perhaps I'm missing something, but after re-reading the OP, I sure don't see what it is that has you so riled up.
Timothy

(in reply to dechala)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Confused?? - 7/21/2005 11:55:58 AM   
domtimothy46176


Posts: 670
Joined: 12/25/2004
From: Dayton, Ohio area
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: dechala

quote:

ORIGINAL: domtimothy46176


quote:

ORIGINAL: plantlady64

Hello There,
I have just the opposite thing happening with me. In my profile I say my Master is Gunship and they can reach him here if they'd like to talk to him directly.
No only does no one send him messages about me, but when they ask to meet me in places other than the two options I'm permitted I refer them to my Master. They don't write him then either.

Funny huh? They ask to speak with your Master and prefer not to talk to mine even if it's requested.

Sincerely,
sub suzanne


LOL, toy has had the same thing happen. Kind of makes you wonder why they contacted you in the first place, doesn't it? I chalk it up to horny clueless wannabes who have no understanding of what a committed relationship means.
Timothy

Just out of curiosity why did you give me that answer? LOL


If you re-read, you'll see it was in response to plantlady.

(in reply to dechala)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Confused?? - 7/21/2005 12:07:59 PM   
dechala


Posts: 114
Joined: 2/20/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: domtimothy46176


quote:

ORIGINAL: dechala

quote:

ORIGINAL: domtimothy46176


quote:

ORIGINAL: plantlady64

Hello There,
I have just the opposite thing happening with me. In my profile I say my Master is Gunship and they can reach him here if they'd like to talk to him directly.
No only does no one send him messages about me, but when they ask to meet me in places other than the two options I'm permitted I refer them to my Master. They don't write him then either.

Funny huh? They ask to speak with your Master and prefer not to talk to mine even if it's requested.

Sincerely,
sub suzanne


LOL, toy has had the same thing happen. Kind of makes you wonder why they contacted you in the first place, doesn't it? I chalk it up to horny clueless wannabes who have no understanding of what a committed relationship means.
Timothy

Just out of curiosity why did you give me that answer? LOL


If you re-read, you'll see it was in response to plantlady.

Right which is why i asked why you didn't give me the same answer as her

_____________________________

dechala

"As soon we find a motel i'm gonna put my little honeybunny bride on the bed and tie her up.."
Natural Born Killers

(in reply to domtimothy46176)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Confused?? - 7/21/2005 12:11:31 PM   
dechala


Posts: 114
Joined: 2/20/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: domtimothy46176


quote:

ORIGINAL: dechala

quote:

ORIGINAL: domtimothy46176


OTOH, I have never met a girl who refused to put me in contact with her master. Such a refusal would make me wonder if she was hiding her activities from her master or was otherwise afraid of being caught in unapproved behavior. One would think a girl who was striving to make her master proud would have no reason to hide her master's contact information from any who sought it. Perhaps there are other possibilities that haven't occurred to me.

Timothy

i suppose but i just don't feel the need to give out anyone's personal details.Why would that make me suspect?i mean really what business is it of others for me to give out names and personal info?And then when i do finally give them(my Dom has oked it for me to give His email) then they never ever contact him.i understand your answer but aren't there just some things about a sub's life that should be at least somewhat personal? i sunno perhaps its just me


Who's talking about personal details? [email protected] is hardly personal and has nothing to do with the personal details of your life. What does that have to do with the original post, where you asked why a dominant would want to contact your dom, or my answer giving various reasons. Giving out personal details to strangers was never addressed by either of us. I never even advocated giving out your master's e-mail addy without his express permission. While toy does have permission to hand out my e-mail address, I could just as easily have instructed her to notify querants that if they wished to speak with me to leave an e-mail addy and I would be in contact with them.
Perhaps I'm missing something, but after re-reading the OP, I sure don't see what it is that has you so riled up.
Timothy

Woah,where did that come from?.im not at all riled up.i said i understood where you're coming from.i don't think that i attacked you but If i did my apologies.Just tossing questions around because im bored here at work this afternoon.Just a curiosity post thats all.No need for any of us to get riled up

< Message edited by dechala -- 7/21/2005 12:12:56 PM >

_____________________________

dechala

"As soon we find a motel i'm gonna put my little honeybunny bride on the bed and tie her up.."
Natural Born Killers

(in reply to domtimothy46176)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Confused?? - 7/21/2005 12:13:28 PM   
Davesgirl


Posts: 89
Joined: 5/13/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: domtimothy46176


quote:

ORIGINAL: Davesgirl

LOL! Same thing happens to jsut about every sub/slave on here...

My oppinion? They want what they cant have. I've recieved my fair share of them, as well. I simply ask them what part of my profile confused them most, and that they have no need to speak with my Master. Most times it works. If it doesnt....Well... I have a tendancy to get a bit snide with them. That always works.

I'd say just ignore them. Eventually they'll go away. Dont let them bring you down, either. Theres a lot of great people on ehre. Just have to weed out the assholes first


I looked at your profile and you mention that ~you~ seek advice on how to help your master understand your needs and desires. Yet, if someone contacts you and requests to speak with him directly, you tell them no. Is this per his instructions, or something you've taken upon yourself? I only ask because this is not something I've run across before. I can understand if he doesn't care to have contact with folks from here (although if that were the case I can't imagine why he would allow ~you~ on her either), but I can't imagine a situation where toy would presume to judge for herself who is or is not allowed to have contact with me.
Thanks,
Timothy



Ok, I didnt quite explain myself well enough. The ones that I dont pass along to my Master, are the ones who tell me how much bigger their penis is, or how talented their tongues are, and that I will be so much happier and fulfilled with them rather than him, should I jsut let them speak to him and have him release me. Those are the ones I was referring to.

If someone messaged me, asking to speak to my Master and had a valid reason to, I would first see if he wished me to give his email out. If he wanted me to, then I, of course, would. He doesnt have a profile or account on here, as that is his choice. He doesnt spend a lot of time online period, really. He allows me to have my account because he trusts me, quite simply. Im not out looking for anything on the side, or someone to leave him for.

Hope this calrrified my oppinion a bit better

(in reply to domtimothy46176)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Confused?? - 7/21/2005 12:16:43 PM   
domtimothy46176


Posts: 670
Joined: 12/25/2004
From: Dayton, Ohio area
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: dechala

quote:

ORIGINAL: domtimothy46176


quote:

ORIGINAL: dechala

quote:

ORIGINAL: domtimothy46176


OTOH, I have never met a girl who refused to put me in contact with her master. Such a refusal would make me wonder if she was hiding her activities from her master or was otherwise afraid of being caught in unapproved behavior. One would think a girl who was striving to make her master proud would have no reason to hide her master's contact information from any who sought it. Perhaps there are other possibilities that haven't occurred to me.

Timothy

i suppose but i just don't feel the need to give out anyone's personal details.Why would that make me suspect?i mean really what business is it of others for me to give out names and personal info?And then when i do finally give them(my Dom has oked it for me to give His email) then they never ever contact him.i understand your answer but aren't there just some things about a sub's life that should be at least somewhat personal? i sunno perhaps its just me


Who's talking about personal details? [email protected] is hardly personal and has nothing to do with the personal details of your life. What does that have to do with the original post, where you asked why a dominant would want to contact your dom, or my answer giving various reasons. Giving out personal details to strangers was never addressed by either of us. I never even advocated giving out your master's e-mail addy without his express permission. While toy does have permission to hand out my e-mail address, I could just as easily have instructed her to notify querants that if they wished to speak with me to leave an e-mail addy and I would be in contact with them.
Perhaps I'm missing something, but after re-reading the OP, I sure don't see what it is that has you so riled up.
Timothy

Woah,where did that come from?.im not at all riled up.i said i understood where you're coming from.i don't think that i attacked you but If i did my apologies.Just tossing questions around because im bored here at work this afternoon.Just a curiosity post thats all.No need for any of us to get riled up


Sorry if I read too much into your reply. When you jumped horses in mid-stream, going from a general question about why a dominant would seek contact with your master to what I inferred was an unrelated rant about people wanting personal details about your private life, I assumed there was some underlying agitation. My bad.
Timothy

(in reply to dechala)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Confused?? - 7/21/2005 12:18:14 PM   
dechala


Posts: 114
Joined: 2/20/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: domtimothy46176


quote:

ORIGINAL: dechala

quote:

ORIGINAL: domtimothy46176


quote:

ORIGINAL: plantlady64

Hello There,
I have just the opposite thing happening with me. In my profile I say my Master is Gunship and they can reach him here if they'd like to talk to him directly.
No only does no one send him messages about me, but when they ask to meet me in places other than the two options I'm permitted I refer them to my Master. They don't write him then either.

Funny huh? They ask to speak with your Master and prefer not to talk to mine even if it's requested.

Sincerely,
sub suzanne


LOL, toy has had the same thing happen. Kind of makes you wonder why they contacted you in the first place, doesn't it? I chalk it up to horny clueless wannabes who have no understanding of what a committed relationship means.
Timothy

Just out of curiosity why did you give me that answer? LOL


If you re-read, you'll see it was in response to plantlady.


oops i apologize.That was a typo,it was supposed to be why didn't you give me the same answer

_____________________________

dechala

"As soon we find a motel i'm gonna put my little honeybunny bride on the bed and tie her up.."
Natural Born Killers

(in reply to domtimothy46176)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Confused?? - 7/21/2005 12:21:01 PM   
domtimothy46176


Posts: 670
Joined: 12/25/2004
From: Dayton, Ohio area
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: dechala

quote:

ORIGINAL: domtimothy46176


quote:

ORIGINAL: dechala

quote:

ORIGINAL: domtimothy46176


quote:

ORIGINAL: plantlady64

Hello There,
I have just the opposite thing happening with me. In my profile I say my Master is Gunship and they can reach him here if they'd like to talk to him directly.
No only does no one send him messages about me, but when they ask to meet me in places other than the two options I'm permitted I refer them to my Master. They don't write him then either.

Funny huh? They ask to speak with your Master and prefer not to talk to mine even if it's requested.

Sincerely,
sub suzanne


LOL, toy has had the same thing happen. Kind of makes you wonder why they contacted you in the first place, doesn't it? I chalk it up to horny clueless wannabes who have no understanding of what a committed relationship means.
Timothy

Just out of curiosity why did you give me that answer? LOL


If you re-read, you'll see it was in response to plantlady.

Right which is why i asked why you didn't give me the same answer as her


I didn't give her any answer of any kind because she wasn't asking any questions. She made a comment about her experience and I responded to that by relating toy's similar experience. You asked about why people would want to contact your master, so I gave you many different possible reasons.
Timothy

(in reply to dechala)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Confused?? - 7/21/2005 12:23:29 PM   
dechala


Posts: 114
Joined: 2/20/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: domtimothy46176


quote:

ORIGINAL: dechala

quote:

ORIGINAL: domtimothy46176


quote:

ORIGINAL: dechala

quote:

ORIGINAL: domtimothy46176


OTOH, I have never met a girl who refused to put me in contact with her master. Such a refusal would make me wonder if she was hiding her activities from her master or was otherwise afraid of being caught in unapproved behavior. One would think a girl who was striving to make her master proud would have no reason to hide her master's contact information from any who sought it. Perhaps there are other possibilities that haven't occurred to me.

Timothy

i suppose but i just don't feel the need to give out anyone's personal details.Why would that make me suspect?i mean really what business is it of others for me to give out names and personal info?And then when i do finally give them(my Dom has oked it for me to give His email) then they never ever contact him.i understand your answer but aren't there just some things about a sub's life that should be at least somewhat personal? i sunno perhaps its just me


Who's talking about personal details? [email protected] is hardly personal and has nothing to do with the personal details of your life. What does that have to do with the original post, where you asked why a dominant would want to contact your dom, or my answer giving various reasons. Giving out personal details to strangers was never addressed by either of us. I never even advocated giving out your master's e-mail addy without his express permission. While toy does have permission to hand out my e-mail address, I could just as easily have instructed her to notify querants that if they wished to speak with me to leave an e-mail addy and I would be in contact with them.
Perhaps I'm missing something, but after re-reading the OP, I sure don't see what it is that has you so riled up.
Timothy

Woah,where did that come from?.im not at all riled up.i said i understood where you're coming from.i don't think that i attacked you but If i did my apologies.Just tossing questions around because im bored here at work this afternoon.Just a curiosity post thats all.No need for any of us to get riled up


Sorry if I read too much into your reply. When you jumped horses in mid-stream, going from a general question about why a dominant would seek contact with your master to what I inferred was an unrelated rant about people wanting personal details about your private life, I assumed there was some underlying agitation. My bad.
Timothy

Nope just a curious kitty,thats all.If i were really agitated i wouldnt have posted pubically about it as ive been on the forums many times at b.com and have seen how people are flamed mercilessly about that.i have no desire to be flamed.As you can see by most of my other topics that ive started,its just me being curious and floofy

_____________________________

dechala

"As soon we find a motel i'm gonna put my little honeybunny bride on the bed and tie her up.."
Natural Born Killers

(in reply to domtimothy46176)
Profile   Post #: 20
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