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What do you sow? - 10/12/2007 11:56:31 AM   
Bearlee


Posts: 2311
Joined: 10/25/2004
From: South Central CO
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I heard the other day that over 40 children died last year during school shootings.  I’m floored!  ...and kinda scared, frankly.
 
What kind of children are we raising?  Do people even spend time with their kids anymore?  I’ve seen commercials where sitting down to a bucket of chicken is ‘a family meal’?  What are we doing?  Where are we going?  …and what kind of a parent buys their 14 year old an assault rifle?
 
They say we reap that which we sow.  What do you sow?  (What are you personally doing to make the world a better place?)
 
b

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RE: What do you sow? - 10/12/2007 12:00:34 PM   
pahunkboy


Posts: 33061
Joined: 2/26/2006
From: Central Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		at the moment i am not clogging the highway.

i have no kids and it would be sorta arkward to be too interested  in any kids- so there ya go.

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RE: What do you sow? - 10/12/2007 12:08:13 PM   
Bearlee


Posts: 2311
Joined: 10/25/2004
From: South Central CO
Status: offline 		...don't clog the highway?  For some reason, I take that to mean, you have no car.  Well, if that is a personal decision; I applaud you!  When living in San Francisco...that was a real possibility; but not in rural CO, for me, anyway.
 
Do you recycle?  Do you volunteer time somewhere needed?  Donate goods to places that help others?  Do you mentor kids?  Do you plant trees?
 
Why is 'interest in kids' an awkward thing, I wonder?  ...or did you mean 'sexual'?  WOW...such a leap. 
 
b

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RE: What do you sow? - 10/12/2007 12:13:08 PM   
pahunkboy


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Joined: 2/26/2006
From: Central Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		actually that is exactly how it would look if a single male w/o kids was too interested in children. the world is a dangerous place- and simply being in the wrong place can fry a guy.

I do plant trees. 47 to be exact.

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RE: What do you sow? - 10/12/2007 12:16:38 PM   
pahunkboy


Posts: 33061
Joined: 2/26/2006
From: Central Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		Now to answer your question.

[sorry for the attitude]

When I served in Americorps; my team designed a presentation that went to all the 6th grade classes in the county.  It dealt with peer pressure, and diversity. I have video of our work. It was quite impressive.


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RE: What do you sow? - 10/12/2007 12:35:57 PM   
Bearlee


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Joined: 10/25/2004
From: South Central CO
Status: offline 		 
Wow...  47 trees!!!   Awesome...   really!   I'm sad to say I recently cut down three yuckie apple trees that were planted in wrong places and messy, nasty trees with yucky, mealy apples.  But, they were still beautiful trees (well, one was), and it broke my heart to cut them down. 
 
I did plant others, as well as about a dozen shrubs that feed wildlife with flowers and berries...as well as bunches of perenials that offer more flowers, berries, seeds, etc. 
 
Oh, and all are 'natural' to this area or something similar; low water, etc.  I conduct what I call 'turf wars'...and dig up excess lawn (not all of it but well over half) and plant naturalistic, low-water gardens instead.
 
And, I recycle.  I am amazed at how many people do not recycle!!!  Sheeshhhhhhhhh  In the small town where I live, the recycle place is next to the post office where everyone has to go get mail (they don't deliver in town)...and yet many people do not recycle.  <shakes head>  I find that disheartening.
 
Kewl... Americorp!  Good for you, boy!   ...and 47 trees is just awesome!!!  Thank you!
 
beverly

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RE: What do you sow? - 10/12/2007 12:46:08 PM   
pahunkboy


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Joined: 2/26/2006
From: Central Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		interesting. i am turning much of my yard into wild flowers. i was looking for the link. darn. anyhow- next year it will be stop the car gorgious. 8 feet flowers-

i S0 would like to be in the country,,,,but in time i will get there.

the neighbors were concerned about it being too foresty. i told them it would look more like a botanical garden. they like it. one is even copying it,  :-)

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RE: What do you sow? - 10/12/2007 12:49:15 PM   
nyrisa


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Bearlee

What kind of children are we raising?  Do people even spend time with their kids anymore? 



Maybe it is the kind of time people are spending with their children that is the problem. Too many kids see their parents abusing alcohol or drugs; see their parents treating each other disrespectfully, arguing or even outright abusing spouse or others; many children are abused or are treated as a burden or a mistake, or used as leverage against an ex-spouse.

They see on TV a lifestyle portrayed as the norm that most will never acheive, or at least not until middle age, after years of struggle, yet the teens and young adults on TV live in nice apartments, have plenty of time and money for clothes and entertainment, and apparently no worries about job or future. Basically kids are being set up for unrealistic expectations of what adulthood, or life in general, will be.

They go to school, where they are judged and discriminated against by how attractive they are, how well dressed, how socially skilled, how intelligent they are, and how popular or how athletically gifted. And the ones who fall outside the norm in these areas are either ignored, or teased, or bullied.

If you take kids who have never been truly valued for themselves, never given a strong foundation of love and trust in upbringing, who have been brainwashed with unrealistic expectations, then often cruelly shown that they will never fit in or achieve this "ideal" life, add in the usually chaotic atmosphere of high schools and middle schools, where kids get lost in the shuffle of hundreds of others, and then top off their disillusionment and despair with the false glory that the media affords to the perpetrators of school shootings, and you will often find that a kid who can't get attention in the normal way, will choose to make his own blaze of glory and settle a few scores in the process. I think school shootings or bombings will increase as the number of copycat crimes continues.

(sorry for probably the longest runon sentence in the world, but it is one of those days.)

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RE: What do you sow? - 10/12/2007 1:00:32 PM   
pahunkboy


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Joined: 2/26/2006
From: Central Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		-as for copycats... we had endless bomb threats called into the schools. well- they started NOT cancelling school- but to move it to another location, mainly a competing school.

once it got out that one doesnt get the day off school- but is then is held at a [?rival] school; the calls stopped.

hmm.

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RE: What do you sow? - 10/12/2007 1:02:25 PM   
Bearlee


Posts: 2311
Joined: 10/25/2004
From: South Central CO
Status: offline 		Well, if you create the garden in a kind of ordered disorder…you’ll do fine.  Paths are good…and LOTS of mulch keep things looking tidy.   I prefer smaller trees.  I live near a river so have 100+ trees (willows and cottonwoods) that surround the four lots I have…but in my yard; I prefer smaller specimen trees of say 12-15 feet.
 
I use http://www.highcountrygardens.com/ in Santa Fe a lot; great place.  I like their philosophy; surely there is such a place near you…
 
 
What other ways do people help our planet/country/neighborhood/furture generations?
 beverly


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RE: What do you sow? - 10/12/2007 1:05:26 PM   
Bearlee


Posts: 2311
Joined: 10/25/2004
From: South Central CO
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ahhhhhhhh... but what a GREAT run-on sentence that last paragraph WAS!
 
<applauds!>
beverly

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RE: What do you sow? - 10/12/2007 1:13:13 PM   
Marc2b


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quote:

Why is 'interest in kids' an awkward thing, I wonder?  ...or did you mean 'sexual'?  WOW...such a leap.

 
In this day and age adult males, in particular middle-aged white males, have to tread carefuly around children.  Engage in the simple pleasure of watching young children play and people look at you with suspicion, they leap to conclusions.  Even looking out for their safety can make you suspect.  I run a certain set of errands every day which usually takes me by a local elementary school as it is letting out.  Apparently that made some parent suspicious because one day I was pulled over by the police and asked why I always went by at that time a day.  They also wanted to know why I would "frequently look at the children" (the suspicious parents words I believe) as I drove by.  I told the cop that the answer to that should be obvious -- SO I DON'T RUN THE LITTLE TYKES OVER!   

Sheesh.

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RE: What do you sow? - 10/12/2007 1:14:50 PM   
OrionTheWolf


Posts: 7803
Joined: 10/11/2006
Status: offline 		Raised a 22 year old to be respectful, frugal and put positive thoughts into things. Raising a 16 year old son, that is not afraid of hard work, gets decent grades, knows how to be respectful, and does not expect anything to be given to him. He mimics my quote often "You get out of life, what you are willing to put effort into." and the other one "If it were easy, everyone would do it.".

Orion

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RE: What do you sow? - 10/12/2007 1:19:44 PM   
Bearlee


Posts: 2311
Joined: 10/25/2004
From: South Central CO
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Awesome, Wolf!  I believe politics are best close to the vest (or home).  Same goes for teaching...I believe the most important work is done at home.  It seems you're doing a great job!
 
Do some people think it's the school's job to give children the definition of a Man or a Woman?  I believe it's up to us, and that we lead by example.
 
Who places value in their partners or their children?  Who makes it clear to those people that they have value?  I think sometimes people get too wrapped up in their lives and forget to just live.
 
b

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RE: What do you sow? - 10/12/2007 1:19:48 PM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline 		I have raised two kids that are amazing wonderful awsome fantastic.. adults. I just adore both of them (couldn't tell could you?). One has even made me a grandmother to two adorable little terrors ages 2 & 3. I spend alot of time, given daily schedules and distance, with all of them. At least one weekend a month they spend at the farm with me. We also check in with one another on the phone every few days, if only for a quick "I just wanted to say hi, see how you're doing, and tell you I love you" kinda of thing. Don't get me wrong, they have inherited alot of my .....less than admirable....traits, which makes for some rather heated moments also. Through it all we have a very strong bond of love.

I do my best to teach the values that are important to me, kindness, manners, personal integrity, taking ownership of your own shit aka personal responsibility, the value of hard work, giving back. They all share my love of nature and animals. I take them hiking and exploring nature, teaching them about the things they see and how important it is to protect it. How to find joy in the simple pleasures of life.

I carpool to work most days. My 3 acre yard and orchard has more trees than I can count, many I have planted. I feed the birds. I've only just begun the flower beds over the last 2-3 years and except for the roses, I try to stick with drought tollerant plants. Our soil is mostly clay, terrible stuff really. I use alot of my excess horse poo, composted, to till into the ground to help make it more condusive to growing. Lots of composting! We have also begun a rain water collection system to avoid using tap water for plants, it is a wonderful thing. Have switched to burning a fuel (to heat my house) that does not contribute all the icky stuff to the ozone that fossil fuels do.

I try to remember that I am part of something much bigger and while I have to value myself, it really isn't ALL ABOUT ME. Yet, I can have a huge effect on what is bigger. It is up to me wether that is positive or negative.

< Message edited by LaTigresse -- 10/12/2007 1:25:16 PM >

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RE: What do you sow? - 10/12/2007 1:22:32 PM   
JackM1


Posts: 137
Joined: 2/3/2007
Status: offline 		so, as a student(meaning i am indeed still in this group known as "children" simply because i still rely on my parents for...oh everything that needs $..hell my mother is my boss..) and as someone who works with the younger spectrum, i can say that generally it isnt the parents who fail. granted, there is a lot of responsability there, but when you dont see your kid for 12 hours a day, putting them in daycare from 7-7 so you can do your job to PAY for that daycare, and put your kids in front of the tv and send them off to school, you pretty much put all your faith into the people who are watching and teaching your child, and the images they are viewing. you may not want them to watch certain things, speak a certain way or have a bad attitute, but, especially in the later years, when your kids are thrust into the world of peer pressure i defy you to say "no" when they are sobbing about being teased for not wearing the same clothes as everyone else, or because you wont let their friends over because of the way they talk.

even with the younger kids, they might have the best parents in the world, but unless they are with the kids 24/7 there is no guarentee that they will turn well either, and even then, some kids are just born bad....its a bad thing to say, but its true...some of the kids i work with, great parents, but no matter how many hugs they get or how much structure and love, they just are...bad...and thats how they continue on.

again though, parents ARE responsible...but you cant say that parents are the ONLY thing thats effecting how kids turn out these days..it would be horrably irrisponsible to put all the blaim on them or the child, and not try to fix the real route of the problem; general society's pranoia and stupidity, the media, and the lack of structured community.

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RE: What do you sow? - 10/12/2007 1:23:26 PM   
pahunkboy


Posts: 33061
Joined: 2/26/2006
From: Central Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		LaT, now im jealous. You live in the boonies?

man im so ready to get away from this darn highway.

arghh

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RE: What do you sow? - 10/12/2007 1:26:18 PM   
Bearlee


Posts: 2311
Joined: 10/25/2004
From: South Central CO
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

...Don't get me wrong, they have inherited alot of my .....less than admirable....traits, which makes for some rather heated moments also. Through it all we have a very strong bond of love.
...


Awwwww  Personally, I applaud adults who let their children see them angry, sad, happy, frustrated, needy, romantic, proud, silly, unknowing, knowing...  How else do we teach them how to be all those things...which we all ARE?  
 
People sometimes forget to discuss behavior and instead point at the person and deem them unforgivable.  Or...so fabulous the kid grows up believing that too, and learns a life without limits.  Just as bad, huh?
 
b

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RE: What do you sow? - 10/12/2007 1:31:05 PM   
LaTigresse


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Status: offline 		I really live in the boonies now, they closed the state highway the farm is on to tear down and rebuild a bridge. Makes our road almost a dead end for the next year.

It has it's pros and cons. The distance to drive anywhere is huge compared to living in town, or even near a sizable town. Forget any sort of decent shopping. I do alot of mail order.

The best part of living where I do, being home is much like being on vacation. It's certainly not a luxury estate but it is cosy and comfy with a wonderful view and a great atmosphere. Very peaceful and quiet with an almost palpable spirituality about it. There used to be a large american indian population in our area. We are always finding artifacts like arrow heads. Sometimes I almost think I can feel their presence, it feels like it was a special place for them.

< Message edited by LaTigresse -- 10/12/2007 1:41:48 PM >

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RE: What do you sow? - 10/12/2007 1:33:14 PM   
pahunkboy


Posts: 33061
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From: Central Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		A good time to note that when we went into the schools- are entire "script" had to be ok'ed- word per word. not cos mgmt was being tuff, but becos we could be sued for saying or even using the incorrect wording.

anyhow other groups copied our presentation. which is now 1997, old.

i am not sure what type of effect we had- and i hesitate to say - we wont have violence here. tho- i do beleive we via the excercises made an impact- and maybe the world is abit better.

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