RE: Problems with liking an older mistress

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domiguy -> RE: Problems with liking an older mistress (10/20/2007 5:46:52 AM)
It's a hot fantasy....The cool part is that when she dies from osteoporosis or when something goes haywire with her gash that you can hide her body and cash her social security checks.

bulejkt1972 -> RE: Problems with liking an older mistress (10/20/2007 5:54:38 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: domiguy It's a hot fantasy....The cool part is that when she dies from osteoporosis or when something goes haywire with her gash that you can hide her body and cash her social security checks. Hehe - me dink u'r a lill lunylunyluny, domiguy, but what a BLAST u r... :-) yep, let's land this sucker and once and for all kill the stupidity! PEACE, mano!

thetammyjo -> RE: Problems with liking an older mistress (10/20/2007 8:08:42 AM)
Really good advice, bipolarber. I think it really does require more work on the younger person's part because I am still part of the world around me and always will be. I didn't watch transformers as a child as Fox did for example or Knight Rider as a child as he did but I did see them or at least know about them. Fox takes his time to watch shows with me and learn about what was going on when I was a child. He loves dancing too so disco is cool with him; those live action Saturday morning shows though make one of his eyebrows twitch but he does watch them so he can get my culture too.

Rumtiger -> RE: Problems with liking an older mistress (10/20/2007 8:10:40 AM)
I'm liking BoiJen the more she posts.

bulejkt1972 -> RE: Problems with liking an older mistress (10/20/2007 8:26:54 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Rumtiger I'm liking BoiJen the more she posts. Cool...then ask her out on a date, mano! Go for it! Not so much talkin', talkin', talkin'... :-)

Rumtiger -> RE: Problems with liking an older mistress (10/20/2007 9:18:57 AM)
I'll be getting to you later sweetheart. Besides, me and BoiJen would never work out, other than her her "no boys allowed" rule, our hairstyles are just way too similar. I have an older domme, and truthfully I dont really know if its whats in the profile that matters, I think what matters is the actual discussion, the meeting, how they get to know you and whatnot. And talking about intrests are fine as long as you dont get all crazy about them, I mean hell i'm one picky bastard, so conflicting intrests did play a large role in who I chose. As for the whole thing about an older woman itself...I think it has to do with the lower amount of bullshit involved in the realtionship, I can go with any younger girl around my age and I get drama, insanity, hormones, insecurity and all this other crap. With an older woman, I get something much more secure, without the bullshit...and even a little more importantly, an older woman will actually appreciate a younger male, you try getting really appreciated by a 22 year old who gets hit on everytime you two go out.

jmasterson -> RE: Problems with liking an older mistress (10/20/2007 5:49:26 PM)
Thanks, BioJen, for your post, I appreciate what you said. I got called immature a lot by this thread when I disagreed with what certain people said, but personally I think it is immature to label someone as immature just because they disagreed with you. I maturely explained my reasons in all cases and was never hostile or inflammatory, but it was the supposedly older, more mature people here who gave hostile and demeaning replies after I debated what they said. People have implied that I am young and foolish for not simply accepting right away everything that the mistresses have said. But here is what I did: If a mistress gave me advice on an issue in which mistresses would have exclusive expertise, such as something like "Most mistresses probably wouldn’t be attracted to a guy who says that he is hot in his profile", I accepted that advice, because in an area like that they would know better than me. When people criticized me and I responded with explanations and qualifications of why I said what I did, or that I believed that people were exaggerating, people became hostile and sounded angry in certain cases. And the issues I debated weren't ones in which mistresses hold an exclusive expertise, they were usually debates about what I said or semantics. I was always calm and respectful; it was certain "mature" ladies who gave this thread its hostile tone. If you can't have a respectful debate over issues without getting hostile than it is you who is immature. If you get offended because someone who is young like me disagrees with you on an issue in which you don't hold exclusive expertise than it is you who is arrogant. Enough of that. I took the advice of those who offered friendly advice, and I would like to thank them, you all know who you are. You really helped me get a good perspective on how I should represent myself, and the attitude I should have towards a potential mistress. I tried to represent that in my new profile, and I have already received some emails complementing me on how much of an improvement it is. I would invite all who are interested to check out my profile, and if you feel like it email me with your impressions. Thanks again to all who helped. [:D]

cloudboy -> RE: Problems with liking an older mistress (10/20/2007 6:25:03 PM)
I was kind of wondering about the "MILF" theme that was raised in this thread: is it offensive or complimentary? Although there is no universal answer, its clear that some women will find it offensive and some may find it complimentary. I just don't know what the percentages are, but I imagine most Dommes would probably fall into the offended or "not liking the term" category. This fact by itself should give you a bit of pause unless you are only interested in those who find it a compliment. As for my own personal view of MILF, I don't like it. I suppose that's because I like to individualize people, especially any woman I might be courting. I would never want to convey the impression that who I liked or was attracted to could be distilled down into a male, vernacular, acronym. Maybe because you are younger, you just see older women as some large group that's out there --- and as such don't feel any dissonance using a catch phrase to describe them. Also, I was somewhat amused by your description of older women as 25-35, which totally demonstrates the relativism of age. Anyway, plowing an upopular set of ideas or a challenging POV through this forum can make you feel pretty isolated, if not insane. I thought you handled yourself really well, never going ab-homimen, always remaining calm, and still sticking to your own ideas. Always keep your ideas as yours and let your own experiences shape them. Any domme you would want to associate with would never want a docile robot as her partner.

BoiJen -> RE: Problems with liking an older mistress (10/20/2007 7:30:38 PM)
yeah I laughed my self when I saw "older" as 25-35...to me that's not "older"...it's part of my own age range. Then again I know I'm special. My post wasn't for anyone in particular...just to point out that it's silly to ask someone if they're sure about who they are...and it's messed up to get defensive about someone getting defensive. Then again...I bitch and bitchy people. So the lesson of this story is: life is cyclical. As are all of life's processes.

laurell3 -> RE: Problems with liking an older mistress (10/20/2007 8:42:36 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: jmasterson Thanks, BioJen, for your post, I appreciate what you said. I got called immature a lot by this thread when I disagreed with what certain people said, but personally I think it is immature to label someone as immature just because they disagreed with you. I maturely explained my reasons in all cases and was never hostile or inflammatory, but it was the supposedly older, more mature people here who gave hostile and demeaning replies after I debated what they said. People have implied that I am young and foolish for not simply accepting right away everything that the mistresses have said. But here is what I did: If a mistress gave me advice on an issue in which mistresses would have exclusive expertise, such as something like "Most mistresses probably wouldn’t be attracted to a guy who says that he is hot in his profile", I accepted that advice, because in an area like that they would know better than me. When people criticized me and I responded with explanations and qualifications of why I said what I did, or that I believed that people were exaggerating, people became hostile and sounded angry in certain cases. And the issues I debated weren't ones in which mistresses hold an exclusive expertise, they were usually debates about what I said or semantics. I was always calm and respectful; it was certain "mature" ladies who gave this thread its hostile tone. If you can't have a respectful debate over issues without getting hostile than it is you who is immature. If you get offended because someone who is young like me disagrees with you on an issue in which you don't hold exclusive expertise than it is you who is arrogant. Enough of that. I took the advice of those who offered friendly advice, and I would like to thank them, you all know who you are. You really helped me get a good perspective on how I should represent myself, and the attitude I should have towards a potential mistress. I tried to represent that in my new profile, and I have already received some emails complementing me on how much of an improvement it is. I would invite all who are interested to check out my profile, and if you feel like it email me with your impressions. Thanks again to all who helped. [:D] Picture this...you in restraints and a perilous position.....practice these words "Yes Ma'am, as you wish Ma'am"..... You may not realize it but many of the things you say such as "MILF" are just flat out insulting to some of the people that you are targeting as an potential partner. You seem intelligent, I'm sure that's not what you are intending. Stick around a bit and listen. There's an area somewhere between being a doormat and being a smart-ass, find it for yourself. No one is suggesting you have to accept everything right away. But your hesitation to accept pretty much anything offerred suggests to me (and I'm not always right, I grant you that) that you are either not serious or still struggling with your own submission. Neither of these are likely to be things "older Dommes" (haha your definition of older is humorous) are going to want to put up with. The odds of you finding someone compatible that doesn't have 60 other subs clammoring at their feet is incredibly low, read the thread again and decide what you think you need to work on and stick around and get a feel for what these women say about various topics. Although the CM people may not always represent the general public you are contacting in the lifestyle, it's a start.

jmasterson -> RE: Problems with liking an older mistress (10/20/2007 9:25:53 PM)
Laurell, have you read my new profile? I think if you read it you would decide that I did follow much of the advice given. And yes, I took the term milf out lol.

laurell3 -> RE: Problems with liking an older mistress (10/20/2007 9:30:04 PM)
yes and you have mail

laurell3 -> RE: Problems with liking an older mistress (10/20/2007 9:39:43 PM)
honestly though I would suck it up and apologize to those you've offended here and ask their advice on the changes, I'm not your typical Domme being a switchy type and really young guys...well you know..... l

kc692 -> RE: Problems with liking an older mistress (10/20/2007 9:41:36 PM)
As for the other replies... you all did lead me to go over my profile again and after reconsidering it I agree somewhat, I should tone it down. I do notice that there is a certain double standard on collarme. It seems acceptable for female submissives to talk about how hot and picky they are, but apparently it is taboo for a guy to do it. I am confused as to why people said my profile was too sexual, as I didn't mention sex in my profile, only BDSM activities. Just a question, did you mention activities like mowing yards, or doing dishes also, or just the physical things you term as BDSM activities( I am guessing here, I didn't bother to go read the profile before I answered, I'm betting on the odds here, smiles) . In answer to your other point about female subs profiles, you don't know in actuality how successful the profiles are that you are speaking of. Irregardless, you are trying to appeal to a different demographic than some of the female subs( I say some, cuz I can't help it, I like them hot as well as the males). I am more interested in service though, cut young bodies(no offense) are a dime a dozen.

kc692 -> RE: Problems with liking an older mistress (10/20/2007 9:46:14 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: jmasterson To all those saying that I sound like a "do me" sub because I list my interests... part of any personals add is to say what you enjoy so that people can know if they are compatable with you or not. There is a lot of activities covered under BDSM and I say what I am interested in so that others can see if they share those interests and to help people decide whether or not to get farther invovled with me. I know you can use the built in interest list but I chose to emphasize some of my favorite things on my profile so that those who are just browsing can see. I really don't see where you all are coming from on this issue; it is practical for one to list one's interests on a site that focuses on a topic as varied as BDSM. As for the term MILF being disrespectful, it might be if you are uptight but honestly these days its became a very common term for an older woman who is hot (at least from the eyes of young people), and I've seen women use it to describe themselves on other websites such as Adult Friend Finder. I would compare it to a term like BBW. I don't think it is disrespectful because all it really means is that a woman who is a MILF is older (well compared to me, like I would say a MILF is 30's and up) and attractive. Thanks to those who gave advice about finding local groups, I'll look into that. I'm sure it would a pretty interesting experience. And we can find lots with that laundry list of "bdsm interests". What we cant find is someone to do the friggin dishes...[:D]

LaTigresse -> RE: Problems with liking an older mistress (10/20/2007 9:47:41 PM)
Ding ding ding, we have a winner!! Nothing about service, still all about him.

kc692 -> RE: Problems with liking an older mistress (10/20/2007 9:52:00 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: jmasterson quote: ORIGINAL: RumpusParable You're doing the same with other female's posts in this thread that don't tell you what you want to hear. No one said that simply considering yourself attractive is wrong, no one said that addressing your interests was wrong, but you decided to pretend that that is what they said instead of them talking about HOW you addressed these matters in your profile and how it comes across. Ok, let me address this entire statement: I never said that anybody said that me considering myself attractive was wrong, so I don't know where that came from. What I did say is that people seem to take issue with that fact that I express that I think that I am attractive. And I agreed with them that I may have came off as cocky in how I expressed that that, and I said that I decided to change my profile because of that. But I did also say that I didn't think it was as big of a deal as people were making it out to be. Now for the second part of your entire statement: People may have not directly said that addressing my interests was wrong, but they did object to me listing and describing them, such as here: quote: ORIGINAL: LaTigresse "I am especially into face sitting, ass worship, wrestling, watersports, etc.........you get the picture" = Again, this reads as DO ME, not what you can do FOR ME. Around here I have recently learned that "do me" has a negative connotation, so this statement apparently objects to my listing my interests. Perhaps you think I should be more subtle about it, I don't know. I chose to be direct and simply list what I am into, but around here apparently that leads people to give me the lable of "do me", which obviously has a bad connotation. So this leaves me wondering, what would you people consider to be a proper way to address my interests? I really don't know why people have a problem with my directness about it, why mince words? As for my other post that was mainly in response to your first reply, I don't think I took anything out of context. I responded to the areas of your post that I either disagreed with or that I thought needed some explaining on my part. For example, I responded to your line about my bisexuality because I thought it was important that people understood that the line about me being picky was only for guys. You seemed to think that my using the word picky made me sound pompous. I know that most people are picky, but I thought that my pickiness towards guys needed emphasis because I AM very choosy with guys. Its not because I think that I am super good looking but its because of the nature of my sexuality that makes me exceptionally choosy with guys. Anyway, Rumpus, I am wondering if you think that me showing my naked chest on my profile made me seem immature. quote: There are ways to address all the things you discuss in your profile that do not sound so vaguely or (again trying to be clear) making it feel reasonable to wonder if you've ever sent or used a penis photo as a way of meeting someone online. Well incase you did start to wonder no, I don't send penis pics (unless requested). Since I'm bi I have a profile on another website and I hate it when people send penis pics or have that for their profile pic... everyone has a cock, I want to see the rest of a person. Just felt like adding that. ;) Keep thinking that it is not a big deal that your interests are at the forefront and that doesnt impact your profile negatively, that is your right. You are totally correct in that the fact you do not talk about anything else but those interests show exactly where they lie, (and where they do not, for example intelligence, etc). I'm with you....since you argued with the women that were trying to help you and tell you from the exact gender you were asking for input from, what their opinion was....keep that profile exactly the same!![;)] It will tell all the older women you seek exactly where your head(s) (both of em) truly are at, and save them from wasting a lot of time, that is unless they for some reason think your boy toy ass is better than the other boy toys... edited to add: we really need to get a choice for bottom instead of sub. There is nothing wrong with being a bottom, but that is what you are my boy, not a submissive. Again nothing wrong with that, but shrugs good luck to you, I wish you the best finding what you term a femdom that is interested in that.

jmasterson -> RE: Problems with liking an older mistress (10/20/2007 10:11:45 PM)
Did you read the whole topic? Becuase I never argued with contsructive advice I argued about other stuff that seems pretty pointless, such as semantics and the unfair exagerations made by certain people. If you view my profile now you should find that I did change it and listened to most of the advice.

RumpusParable -> RE: Problems with liking an older mistress (10/20/2007 10:25:42 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: jmasterson Laurell, have you read my new profile? I think if you read it you would decide that I did follow much of the advice given. And yes, I took the term milf out lol. I'm glad that despite your responses (and on re-reading, edited to add, continuing responses) to the dommes and others here who talked to you about this that you did end up listening some. Your profile sounds MUCH better now, it is a big improvement. As others have pointed out, it still partially reads like a laundry-list, though. Again, as it's been said before here, there is absolutely nothing wrong with mentioning your main interests, limits, etc. -in fact, it's rather a pain when someone doesn't. So we come back to finding the middle road: expressing your interests but not having it not sound like all you care for it your interests. Add in more about what you have to offer, how you can enrich a dominant's life (or hour or...). It's fairly common to read a profile or speak to someone that shares an enjoyed activity (say flogging, watersports, whatever the case may be), but it's less common -by a great amount- to find someone who makes it sound like it would be a good time with them.

kc692 -> RE: Problems with liking an older mistress (10/20/2007 10:25:45 PM)
It's better. Although you definitely kept in the part you thought important, I do notice you added a bit more also. As I said, I truly wish you luck, that was not meant to sound bitchy the first time, I meant it. Good luck!!!! goes on to other threads to find if anyone is awake, or if the rabblerousers are all tired like her and is quiet[:)]

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