quote:

ORIGINAL: mysticalcreature

Well see he is ignoring me and perhaps the issue is all mine, but she is always around and stays the night, he goes over there and so on.  I am not able to be there, he says that nothing will ever happen she is just a friend that she destroyed any "loving feelings" but when he is ignorning me because I made a comment about her not sure what to do.  Now when all this other stuff, her staying at his house, he told me about it before it happened, but never tells me when he goes over there.  I am intimidated by her, they have a long history together and she is there right now and I am not.  Should I simply trust him and take him at his word that nothing is happening or will happen and that he "loves me?"  He says he loves me .... any suggestions?

quote:

ORIGINAL: KiandPhoenix

My ex. . .we deal with her by loaning her my car yesterday so she could go job and car hunting, we planned to have my family christmas at her place this year, she babysits for us on occasion, we used to tabletop game with her and if she were not going to my BIG family Thanksgiving to avoide her family, we would be at her place for that also.

I keep good relations with my past partners, and only their new partners insecurity has ended some good friendships. I love the people I was in relationships with, and even though the relationship ended does not mean I ceased to love them.

On the other hand, Phoenix has had some bad past relations. Her current ex has two children with her, so he is going to be around for at least another six months I suspect before he becomes a total deadbeat. We deal with him as little as we can, and she did not keep great relations past a couple months with her other ex's, so we don't have to deal with them.

How you should handle things is entirely dependent on you. First you should let your sir know about your feelings. There may be nothing to worry about. If you are that worried about it, egotiate some limits reguarding ex's. Phoenix and my ex are friends now, but we still have a rule here about no ex's. This was a rule I put out because I am not comfortable with my partners going back to their ex's, not the other way around.

~Ki