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Been talking to a Dom on here and He - 10/21/2007 1:10:34 AM

winterlight

Posts: 1319
Joined: 2/18/2006
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has been reading my messages but not answering them. I take it i am dismissed. It has been 6 days since He last messaged me....

How long does one wait? I was warned that He is busy but if U read my message and not reply kinda odd isn't it?

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RE: Been talking to a Dom on here and He - 10/21/2007 1:28:49 AM

hisannabelle

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Joined: 12/3/2006
From: Tallahassee, FL, USA
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greetings winterlight,

if he has told you he is busy, i would give him more time to respond. it is not rare for me to read messages and not respond right away, or even within a few days...sometimes i need some more space to find the right words to respond, and sometimes i just don't have the energy. perhaps you could message him just to ask if he's okay, and let him know you are worried? at least he might respond to let you know he is planning to return your other messages at a later time, so you are not left hanging.

respectfully,
annabelle.

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RE: Been talking to a Dom on here and He - 10/21/2007 1:33:25 AM

MissMagnolia

Posts: 3636
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Hm, you're only talking in email? He might just be busy or he might have lost interest. Either way, what are you actually waiting for? He didn't have you collared did he?

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RE: Been talking to a Dom on here and He - 10/21/2007 1:42:47 AM

winterlight

Posts: 1319
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no, i am not collared.

tyvm for the replies..

(in reply to MissMagnolia)

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RE: Been talking to a Dom on here and He - 10/21/2007 1:45:28 AM

Aileen68

Posts: 6091
Joined: 8/2/2005
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Yeah...six days is a little long, but if you're emailing here through collarme you might want to make sure that it's not just a glitch in the system before you assume that he's not answering. He may not be receiving the emails even though it says he's read them or you may not be receiving his replies.

< Message edited by Aileen68 -- 10/21/2007 1:46:03 AM >

(in reply to winterlight)

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RE: Been talking to a Dom on here and He - 10/21/2007 1:47:42 AM

MissMagnolia

Posts: 3636
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Then in that case you get on with it honey. If he's just busy, he doesn't own you and you can still look around and talk to other people. If he is ignoring you, he's an absolute pig and you don't want him anyway, so sod him

.

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RE: Been talking to a Dom on here and He - 10/21/2007 2:58:49 AM

came4U

Posts: 3572
Joined: 1/23/2007
From: London, Ontario
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6 days whoah..that is a whoppin total of 144 hours.

I'm lucky if I am patient enough to sit around faithful to a guy for 6 minutes. Hell, I'm hyper, impatient and just plain uninterested lol.

Never forget, on the 6th day, God created all the animals, ones that walk, ones that creep, fly and all that slither n swim.

He also created man from the dust. Sounds like this guy left you exactly there. Sure he is checking mail but likely bypassing yours for another's. I am a skeptic, sorry :(.

Hope you re-adjust and bounce back quickly, plenty more creepy-crawlies (oops I meant fish,hehe) in the sea.

< Message edited by came4U -- 10/21/2007 3:00:42 AM >

(in reply to MissMagnolia)

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RE: Been talking to a Dom on here and He - 10/21/2007 3:27:15 AM

batshalom

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Joined: 9/17/2007
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Wait until the writing on the wall becomes clear to you. It's an individual matter, no right or wrong answer.

(in reply to came4U)

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RE: Been talking to a Dom on here and He - 10/21/2007 4:42:27 AM

Celeste43

Posts: 3066
Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
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If he has the minute required to read an email, he has the minute needed to reply. You don't do it for him, don't bother to write again, find someone who is a better fit.

(in reply to batshalom)

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RE: Been talking to a Dom on here and He - 10/21/2007 4:48:49 AM

mnottertail

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I am busier than a cat covering shit right now, and will get to you later...

^That statement right there (I timed it) took me 10 seconds to write and I have horrid carpal tunnel... He should be able to at least cut and paste that back to you, every 5 or 6 emails you write. You may give this to him as a present by way of service.

Glad to be of help. No thanks necessary.

Ron

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(in reply to Celeste43)

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RE: Been talking to a Dom on here and He - 10/21/2007 4:57:33 AM

Kellendra

Posts: 95
Joined: 4/17/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

I am busier than a cat covering shit right now, and will get to you later...

^That statement right there (I timed it) took me 10 seconds to write and I have horrid carpal tunnel... He should be able to at least cut and paste that back to you, every 5 or 6 emails you write. You may give this to him as a present by way of service.

Glad to be of help. No thanks necessary.

Ron

quote:

Must be one hell of a bloody cat!.
Agrees with what the others have said...it takes (apparently 10 seconds) for someone to respond to a message, doesn't have to be the Magna Carter of messages but a little something is nice....am impaitent myself I will admit, so I understand where you are coming from.
Best wishes.

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(in reply to mnottertail)

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RE: Been talking to a Dom on here and He - 10/21/2007 5:00:11 AM

laurell3

Posts: 6577
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You're not in an exclusive relationship with him, so the choice is yours. At the very least the guy is being insensitive, at the most blowing you off. At this point he's only pixels to you, so shrug it off and consider it his loss. Unfortunately you will find this happens on the internet alot and many of the people on the bdsm personals sites are not really looking for a relationship of any substance but a short thrill. That means you have to watch out for you very carefully, but keep in mind there are some really decent people out there too.
good luck,
l

(in reply to mnottertail)

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RE: Been talking to a Dom on here and He - 10/21/2007 5:21:59 AM

wisteriaV

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Here's a thought. Have you checked the Bulk section of the e-mail? I have noticed that sometimes e-mails from friends or others that have been sent to Bulk. So look there and if he still hasn't then blow him off, theres others out there that would be more mannerly and would respond to you.

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RE: Been talking to a Dom on here and He - 10/21/2007 7:49:53 AM

PairOfDimes

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No, it's not odd to read and not reply. I often read messages, but want to give them a bit of thought before replying, or, I have the time to read a message, but not to write a good response.

However, a week is a unusually long wait, if you've had a prior correspondence. You might send a quick message asking how things have been.

(in reply to winterlight)

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RE: Been talking to a Dom on here and He - 10/21/2007 8:01:05 AM

WinsomeDefiance

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Try not to let your doubts and insecurities drive your decision making processes. Take it from someone who can speak from experience on this.

If he has written you off, no amount of worry is going to change that. If he has NOT, jumping to conclusions could very possibly do just that. Change things irrevocably. There are some things, I'm sorry can't fix.

Take some time, give him the benefit of the doubt, and relax.

If you really like the guy and don't want to risk closing the door on an opportunity to get to know him better: Write to him in a non-judgemental way and let him know you miss talking to him, and are worried about him. If he doesn't respond, quit writing to him.

If you don't really like the guy and honestly believe he's an inconsiderate bastard, what difference does it make if he doesn't write you back? Move on.

Six days can pass quicker than one thinks, especially when one is busy. Is it inconsiderate not to write back with a quick "I read your letter, and will respond at length when things are less busy." Yes. In my opinion it is inconsiderate. But, in all fairness, it is very easy to get caught up in the day to day responsibilities of life outside the internet.

< Message edited by WinsomeDefiance -- 10/21/2007 8:12:48 AM >

(in reply to PairOfDimes)

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RE: Been talking to a Dom on here and He - 10/21/2007 10:26:56 AM

Estring

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Try spending nore time with your Imaginary Master.

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RE: Been talking to a Dom on here and He - 10/21/2007 10:51:28 AM

brightspot

Posts: 3052
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I wouldn't still be waiting around 3 days later.
Don't stop seeking for what you want.

Some possibilities are;
He really is busy.
He is just a Troll.
He is a teenager messing around.
He is married.

Unless we had been in contact for weeks or better
yet months, I would not interrupt my looking and
would keep myself open to others who may contact me.

Missy.

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(in reply to winterlight)

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RE: Been talking to a Dom on here and He - 10/21/2007 11:17:36 AM

MistressDoMe

Posts: 295
Joined: 7/24/2006
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winterlight, has he been online?
If he has been online and not botherd to contact you, I would move on.
He reads your messages and does not bother to respond?
Move on!

< Message edited by MistressDoMe -- 10/21/2007 11:30:49 AM >

(in reply to winterlight)

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RE: Been talking to a Dom on here and He - 10/21/2007 11:25:23 AM

LadyEsenem

Posts: 24
Joined: 1/27/2006
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It never ceases to amaze me how someone can "give themselves" to someone online. I see it happen all the time and I see many times how they become hurt time and time again. Talking to a Dom or a Domme many times, is like talking to a man when you are vanilla. You're talking, getting to know each other, etc. The term DATING is important here. You are not exclusive until He or She has at least met with you, spent some time together and gotten to know each other in real time.

I know how quickly the heart can be captured online, but it's face to face that honesty is harder to deny. Anyone can be anyone they wish online, (thin, rich, handsome, single).

Do yourself a favor and don't try to be exclusive with people online. To many ... this is just a way of taking away some restless boredom for them... they can lie to you because they know they won't ever really meet you, and therefore they are not responsible for their actions of hurting you.

I'm really not cynical.. I've just seen this happen all the time over and over again.

On a positive note, who knows, maybe by now, he's written to you, and explained that life really did have him by the balls. If not, give yourself as much time as you need to be able to realize that he's nothing more than an internet player.

If that's the case... look for an organization near you that is involved with BDSM where you can actually meet people who are in the scene... munches, private parties, etc...or... host your own munch! I've been running mine for a year and find a lot of satisfaction in hosting them and getting to know more and more scene people.

Good luck to you!!!

Lady Esenem

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RE: Been talking to a Dom on here and He - 10/21/2007 11:31:33 AM

thegirlincharge

Posts: 68
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How long do you wait? You've waited too long already. He is just being disrespectful to you as someone who he may potentially be involved with. You are only talking to him online so far and he has the audacity to tell you he's too busy to respond? But he's not too busy to read your messages? A simple one line is too much for him to write? Busy? No...lazy is more like it....PLEASE! Why even bother with this person.

(in reply to winterlight)

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