How to tell some one to shove off

How to tell some one to shove off (Full Version)

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joanus -> How to tell some one to shove off (10/25/2007 7:06:09 AM)
I discovered the best way to get rid of pesky people who show up at the door. Answer the door shirtless and covered in fake blood (long story) with a gun in your hand. Point the gun at the person's head and say "leave now" then cock the gun. This really works I swear the both of the mormon door-to-door-tract guy pissed and craped themselves then ran for their bikes and hauled ass down the street. If you have any other creative ways of getting rid of pesky people post here.

pahunkboy -> RE: How to tell some one to shove off (10/25/2007 7:18:50 AM)
I tell converters I already have a church. In fact- I "belong" to numerous churches. A money wanted phone yesderday-I told her I am being evicted. My worker technically is supposed to be licensed and bonded. Well- the "church" is "helping" me. :-) One can change churches every week and belong to several churches. Who is goin g to dispute it? The last seller to show up. I said, "please leave" he apoligised and left. My bitch is how China is poisening our children. All the toys are made there- and many contein lead.

beargonewild -> RE: How to tell some one to shove off (10/25/2007 8:43:54 AM)
Do what my cousin's hubby done once and hasn't been bothered since. He was woken up early one saturday morning and he answered the door in his briefs. When they started their speil, he stood there scratching his "boys", needless to say, they quickly excused themselves and never returned!

onmykneesb4Him -> RE: How to tell some one to shove off (10/25/2007 10:09:37 AM)
i just shut the door without a word. If it's the phone, i hang up without saying anything. Saves me the headache of repeating myself over and over and saves us both wasted time.

lilsubl -> RE: How to tell some one to shove off (10/25/2007 11:04:51 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: onmykneesb4Him i just shut the door without a word. If it's the phone, i hang up without saying anything. Saves me the headache of repeating myself over and over and saves us both wasted time. one time, i was doing dishes & the phone rang...this was back in the olden days, before caller id...i answered the phone with soapy hands, only to hear a salesman start into his pitch...i didn't say a word, i just hung up the phone & went back to the dishes...a few moments later, the phone rang again & i answered again...the same salesman yelled, "see how you feel when someone does this to you!!!" & hung up on me [:D]

LaTigresse -> RE: How to tell some one to shove off (10/25/2007 11:54:34 AM)
I live in the middle of nowhere, with a long lane. Usually the people that actually make it to the door are people I want to see. When I lived in the city and someone showed up at the door and started a spiel I just very politely smiled my best faux smile and said thank you but I am not interested. All while a very large, mean looking dog (or dogs, depending on the day) stood staring at them with a hungry "please let me chew on them, mom" look in their eye. Then I shut the door. It always has worked quite well. On the rare occasion I actually answer the home phone..........I generally just set the phone receiver down and go on about my business. I check back in a few minutes to see if they are still talking or if they have given up. When they finally give up, I hang it back up.

GentleShadow -> RE: How to tell some one to shove off (10/25/2007 12:01:34 PM)
A friends father once asked the ladys (when they started their speil) to come on in and get naked and they could talk about it .......needless to say, they quickly excused themselves and never returned!

iammachine -> RE: How to tell some one to shove off (10/25/2007 12:41:23 PM)
Here's hoping that the next visitor to your door isn't the police!

SageFemmexx -> RE: How to tell some one to shove off (10/25/2007 12:50:55 PM)
Ooh I just smile and say, "No thank you, I am a witch" and begin talking to my BLACK cat who usually meows in answer because he adores the attention. Their faces turn white and they beat a path AWAY from my door! lol. Works everytime.

LadyLynx -> RE: How to tell some one to shove off (10/25/2007 1:58:19 PM)
ya know, I told the last Jehovah's Witlesses that I was a Witch, hoping they would run screaming from my porch. Instead they became even more detirmined to convert me and set an Appt. for one of them to come back in a few days. lol. I am a nite owl, so when they came back,(it was 830 am. I was still asleep. darn

pinkme2 -> RE: How to tell some one to shove off (10/25/2007 2:00:23 PM)
I guess I'm weird and just behave with politeness. I tell them no thank you.

lilsubl -> RE: How to tell some one to shove off (10/25/2007 2:09:15 PM)
actually, i have accepted the literature that they have wanted to give me & said thank you & smiled...they appreciate that & often just leave at that point...i figure that enough people give them a hard time...they're kind of inevitable, like death & taxes.......

joanus -> RE: How to tell some one to shove off (10/26/2007 6:57:32 AM)
Some one actually emailed me the best suggestion ever, Since mormons are not allowed to read any thing other than mormon writtings and not allowed to watch TV or listen to the Radio, he suggested a quick educational video. So I recorded the Episode of South Park where they tell the foundation story of Mormonism, most mormons have only the fuzziest idea of How John Smith (the guy was to afraid to use his real name) came up with it. So I invited them to come in and watch the video before trying to sell me on it. They ended up watching and rewatching it for THREE HOURS. I swear one of them checked his copy of the Book of Mormon and renounced his religion right there. They then took a copy of it back to their church. I wonder could I have set in motion the down fall of Mormonism? Note: The three top Mormons in the faith are sex offenders, have multiple child wives (under the age of 16) live in compounds and are on the FBIs most wanted list.

dvart -> RE: How to tell some one to shove off (10/26/2007 7:05:33 AM)
1. Open door 2. Say "no thanks" in a very final kind of way. 3. Close door. Works every time !

sub4hire -> RE: How to tell some one to shove off (10/26/2007 7:05:49 AM)
As far as mormons go I merely tell them what I dislike about their religion. Solicitors...I make it very clear I'm not fond of saleman and I won't be purchasing anything. Someone I know...you merely say I need to be alone get the hell away from me. The list goes on and on. However the primary component is being blunt and to the point.

pahunkboy -> RE: How to tell some one to shove off (10/26/2007 7:06:21 AM)
Utah has folks with multiple wives. [who could handle more then one?]

laurell3 -> RE: How to tell some one to shove off (10/26/2007 7:08:25 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: joanus I discovered the best way to get rid of pesky people who show up at the door. Answer the door shirtless and covered in fake blood (long story) with a gun in your hand. Point the gun at the person's head and say "leave now" then cock the gun. This really works I swear the both of the mormon door-to-door-tract guy pissed and craped themselves then ran for their bikes and hauled ass down the street. If you have any other creative ways of getting rid of pesky people post here. Well here that will get you up to 10 years in prison as a terroristic threat. I agree with other posters, being polite and saying...sorry I have all the girl scout cookies I can handle right now or I really have no interest in your church is the best option for me.

pahunkboy -> RE: How to tell some one to shove off (10/26/2007 7:08:45 AM)
2 ways to get rid of pesters. 1. ask to borrow money. 2. complain about pain levels. GO on and on. Any reply= "thats just like my pain" "except mine is so bad I want to die" #2 works at wedding when nosey relitives ask nosey questions.

Guest123 -> RE: How to tell some one to shove off (10/26/2007 7:12:15 AM)
i'm begining to think i need a wife, two of them might be great... we could all go shopping and paint each others nails and... just grins...

pahunkboy -> RE: How to tell some one to shove off (10/26/2007 7:20:31 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Guest123 i'm begining to think i need a wife, two of them might be great... we could all go shopping and paint each others nails and... just grins... LOL. mom and grams conversations are fairly predictable. Hair dye and curtains. and this coffee is good/bad

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