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RE: Hit and Run domination. Use the man then move on. ... - 10/29/2007 1:50:00 PM   
Aimtoplease101


Posts: 319
Joined: 2/8/2006
From: San Diego, California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PrettyOHDomme

How can you tell a man would be up for this sort of treatment?  The idea certainly has appeal...


If he's a guy, you're probably safe to assume he's up for it.

Regards, ATP

_____________________________

Pleasing you pleases me.

(in reply to PrettyOHDomme)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Hit and Run domination. Use the man then move on. ... - 10/29/2007 1:57:56 PM   
Aimtoplease101


Posts: 319
Joined: 2/8/2006
From: San Diego, California
Status: offline 		One comment that seems appropriate to this topic---

If you peruse the profiles of the dominant women on this site, you'll tend to see a fairly large number of them including statements to the effect that they are seeking a long term relationship, and sometime further to the effect that they are not interested in casual encounters or "one night stands."

It's interesting, because often the rationale for such positions in the vanilla context is that a woman doesn't want to feel used, taken advantage of, slutty, etc., yet in the femdom context the power dynamic should be reversed.  If a Domme wants a casual encounter just to satisfy her urges, she shouldn't feel any compunction about taking what she wants.  Now it's a whole 'nother story if she simply wants something else, the deeper intensity that comes with a relationship.

Regards, ATP

_____________________________

Pleasing you pleases me.

(in reply to Aimtoplease101)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Hit and Run domination. Use the man then move on. ... - 10/29/2007 3:34:06 PM   
undergroundsea


Posts: 2400
Joined: 6/27/2004
From: Austin, TX
Status: offline 		I don't think a one night stand has to be cold.

I have had one night experiences that I keep with me as pleasant experiences. Sometimes the one night experiences remained so because of circumstances (distance--meeting someone at a BDSM event where one or the other had traveled from afar). Sometimes circumstances changed--one or the other became involved elsewhere. Sometimes the initial interest that was there did not grow as chemistry turned out to be weak.

With few exceptions, the one night or short flings I have had carry a positive energy after the experience where even if there is not active contact, there is good will when paths cross again. I think to have such a result depends on both persons involved.

I will add that usually when I play with someone, at that moment I see them as someone with whom I would want to play with again even if I sense that there is not compatibilty or chemistry for an exclusive, long-term relationship.

To me, the matter is not black and white where you either totally dig somebody or use them. While the extremes occur, there is also a whole spectrum in between.

Cheers,

Sea

(in reply to Aimtoplease101)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Hit and Run domination. Use the man then move on. ... - 10/29/2007 8:10:25 PM   
undergroundsea


Posts: 2400
Joined: 6/27/2004
From: Austin, TX
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1
Why not ladies? Men have been doing it to women for years, I see no problem with it and I am sure you would have a line out the door.


To me the more relevant point is that you see no problem with it. If one thinks it is wrong for men to do it then that some (however many) men have done it is not an adequate justification in my opinion.

Cheers,

Sea

(in reply to sexyred1)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Hit and Run domination. Use the man then move on. ... - 10/29/2007 8:21:36 PM   
AllforFun


Posts: 83
Joined: 4/5/2007
Status: offline 		Okay, maybe im just young and a little too geeky, but doea anyone think of AIDS or herpes? Any of the myriad of STDs (some lethal) that are out there?

I cannot stand the thought of having sex with a stranger and knowing virtually nothing about them. This maybe because I am of the first generation who has known about AIDS their entire lives and just cant get into the habbit of one night stands, I dunno. I know one thing though, one night stand isn't worth dying for.

(in reply to Aubre)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Hit and Run domination. Use the man then move on. ... - 10/29/2007 9:25:58 PM   
undergroundsea


Posts: 2400
Joined: 6/27/2004
From: Austin, TX
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: AllforFun
Okay, maybe im just young and a little too geeky, but doea anyone think of AIDS or herpes? Any of the myriad of STDs (some lethal) that are out there?


I think BDSM experiences can be had without sexual intercourse.

Also, if sex is had there are ways to reduce the risk. I agree that unprotected sex in one night stands carries risk of getting an STD.

Cheers,

Sea

(in reply to AllforFun)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Hit and Run domination. Use the man then move on. ... - 10/30/2007 9:56:47 AM   
MsLilac


Posts: 151
Joined: 5/31/2007
Status: offline 		For me anonymous physical pleasure (BDSM, kink, sex, etc) is a pretty empty experience that just doesn’t appeal. Part of the great thing about being in any healthy relationship (regardless of the persuasion of the relationship) is that you learn what that person likes, learn the triggers, the meaning of a groan (or scream) or a particular kind of body movement, and become in tune with that. It took a long time for mine to know how to please and understand me in those deeply intimate ways, and bring me to all kinds of heights, it took me a long time to become comfortable with them and allow them to do that. A brief encounter could scratch an minor, superficial itch, but I place little value on that - give me a bar of chocolate or vibrator over that kind of itch scratching any day.

For me there has to be a connection of some sort. Not necessarily the whole romantic epic, I have happily gone for a fling that lasted for a significant period (weeks/months) and get caught up in the lustiness of it all. It was mainly physical, but there was a positive, friendly connection. But even that was unsatisfying after a while. For me there is no appeal in the one off thing.

I appreciate male beauty, and get lustful, but if the whole package and connection isn’t there, I don’t get lustful enough to want to do the hit and run thing. It is the substantial deeper connection that makes me want to do things to them.

_____________________________

I’m sorry, I don’t do autographs

(in reply to AAkasha)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Hit and Run domination. Use the man then move on. ... - 10/30/2007 10:21:29 AM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline 		I might top someone I've "known" through a kink group at a party or at a public dungeon. I did that a few times in NYC when I was a member of a few groups.

It wasn't a one night stand though and often we'd play again at some other event.

However for me that's just an SM scene -- fun but as fulfilling as my Ds relationships.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to AAkasha)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Hit and Run domination. Use the man then move on. ... - 10/30/2007 10:23:56 AM   
MistressFaye1


Posts: 276
Joined: 10/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: youngsubgeoff

Im gonna throw in my 0.02 here. Ive been dommed for one night by a woman. Afterwords, I never heard from her again. I never felt such a rush of hurt and rage in my life. I also felt foolish, for letting myslef trust anyone that far that I had only known for a few hours.

The only good thing it did was it made me re-think the way I treated groupies. I realized that I basically did the same thing to them, and they probably felt the same way I did.


I can understand how you felt.  Don't lessen the impact it had on you.  It seems to Me that since you experienced that hurt and rage, you learned a life lesson from it and grew. 

I applaud you for being willing to admit that.

Mistress Faye

_____________________________

You can put away your masquerade
You won't ever have to be afraid of Me
Open up your eyes and see what is in store
I must the One that you are searching for.

(in reply to youngsubgeoff)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Hit and Run domination. Use the man then move on. ... - 10/30/2007 10:31:06 AM   
GoddessMine


Posts: 250
Joined: 9/27/2007
Status: offline 		the hurt can be mutually shared.

love,
GM

_____________________________

Pleasure of the Text? Pleasure of the Goddess, more like it.

(in reply to MistressFaye1)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Hit and Run domination. Use the man then move on. ... - 10/30/2007 11:19:24 AM   
fergus


Posts: 1110
Joined: 6/22/2005
Status: offline 		While I personally am not very much into one night stands, I say ...

why not go for it?

Heck, considering the ratio of Dommes to sub males, you could go a long time with two subs at a time, different each time ;)

Be safe, and always communicate.

fergus

(in reply to GoddessMine)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Hit and Run domination. Use the man then move on. ... - 3/3/2008 3:08:25 PM   
shoeho


Posts: 1
Joined: 3/23/2006
Status: offline 		we do think like that here, your just not looking!

(in reply to defiantbadgirl)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: Hit and Run domination. Use the man then move on. ... - 3/3/2008 4:18:20 PM   
MistressDolly


Posts: 917
Joined: 8/24/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha



Do you get any pleasure from dominating a man with lust (as in - physical lust, nothing more) as the motivation?



For me, lust is a matter of chemistry that always goes beyond a hot body or face.


_____________________________

m i s t r e s s d o l l y . c o m

m y s p a c e


(in reply to AAkasha)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: Hit and Run domination. Use the man then move on. ... - 3/3/2008 4:28:43 PM   
hopelesslyInvo


Posts: 522
Joined: 2/10/2008
From: the future
Status: offline 		lol i have such a boring life.  it's probably for the best anyway, i get too easily attached when people take even fleeting interest.  even knowing she wasn't staying i'd have the "puss n boots" eyes going on when she started leaving.  =/

but that would have to be some vampire level quality seduction skills in the first place to break though the shy and nervous barriers.

< Message edited by hopelesslyInvo -- 3/3/2008 4:31:08 PM >

(in reply to AAkasha)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: Hit and Run domination. Use the man then move on. ... - 3/3/2008 4:48:07 PM   
SixFootMaster


Posts: 829
Joined: 9/27/2007
Status: offline 		One of those things that sounds better as a fantasy than the reality.

Getting involved with someone you don't know is basically opening yourself up to every issue and submerged psychological trigger they have. Sure, they look hot, but just how screwed up are they? You don't know. Are they clean? Again, you don't know.

The whole thing is fraught with peril, no matter which way the D/s gender arrangement goes.

I hope anyone considering this realizes that as the dominant and the initiator, you bear full responsibility for anything that goes wrong - whether as a direct result of your actions, or otherwise.

Six.




_____________________________

How-so oft fresh injurious deed
Doth turn Janus' petulant gaze
'pon the rocks and storm rift sea
And littered wood of broken days
disregard for toil shown
no ground broken, no seed sewn.

(in reply to hopelesslyInvo)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Hit and Run domination. Use the man then move on. ... - 3/3/2008 9:02:07 PM   
ShaktiSama


Posts: 1674
Joined: 8/13/2007
Status: offline 		This is pretty much the nature of my photography in a nutshell, to be honest.    Except that sometimes I like the models so much that I work with them repeatedly, dom/sub or vanilla.  :)

_____________________________

"Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea."
-- Robert A. Heinlein

(in reply to defiantbadgirl)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Hit and Run domination. Use the man then move on. ... - 3/4/2008 12:55:37 AM   
KindLadyGrey


Posts: 358
Joined: 11/6/2007
Status: offline 		Casual sex depresses me. I only really enjoy sex if it is with a person I love, and I am not the "love at first sight" sort. Brand me a conservative romantic and pass me by for more adventurous women :P

I am happy to play with someone for only an evening though, and would do so in a heartbeat. "Hello cutie, do you like being tied up and spanked? Come with me!"

(in reply to ShaktiSama)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: Hit and Run domination. Use the man then move on. ... - 3/4/2008 5:33:23 AM   
chezzy52


Posts: 220
Joined: 6/26/2007
Status: offline 		It happened to me once at a play Haloween Party in Binghamton New York.I met a switch there and we got to talking and she was enamored with being or becoming a Domina more than a sub.The talk was straightforward and intelliegnt and then next thing i knew..i was bound and gagged in my Motel room.Of course i was living in new York at the time and i wasn't married at the time either.

(in reply to Aubre)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: Hit and Run domination. Use the man then move on. ... - 3/4/2008 7:37:41 AM   
Dnomyar


Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline 		There are women on CM who just want one night stands. It is not just a guy thing.         

(in reply to chezzy52)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: Hit and Run domination. Use the man then move on. ... - 3/4/2008 7:46:22 AM   
Madame4a


Posts: 2045
Joined: 2/4/2008
From: Washington, DC area
Status: offline 		The idea of it .. is hot hot hot for me.. but the reality just doesn't work for me.. I need time to build trust and for that, I need to get to know someone.. I wish I could do it, I'm envious of the people that can, as I've had so many opportunities...



quote:

ORIGINAL: Aimtoplease101

One comment that seems appropriate to this topic---

If you peruse the profiles of the dominant women on this site, you'll tend to see a fairly large number of them including statements to the effect that they are seeking a long term relationship, and sometime further to the effect that they are not interested in casual encounters or "one night stands."

Regards, ATP


I want to address this... personally I have this in my profile because IF I choose something different, then I choose it.  I can't imagine the amount and quality of mail you'd get on this site if you had anything different in your profile.  Even if a Femme Domme is more than happy to have a one night stand, I can see why she wouldn't put that out there.

Its about WHO makes that decision, at least for me.

(in reply to Aimtoplease101)
Profile   Post #: 60
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