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RE: Money in 24/7 or TPE - 10/28/2007 1:11:53 PM   
bbwsubnnorcal


Posts: 104
Joined: 4/24/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: slaveluci

quote:

ORIGINAL: CuriousLord
the more a "Master" consents to be controlled by the decisions of his slave, the more it deviates from what I see as the M/s dynamic

Just wanted to add a thought here..........a "master" doesn't have to "be controlled by the decisions of his slave."  I know mine sure isn't.  As Susie pointed out about looking at all the houses and narrowing them down to a shortlist, a master can very much benefit from such decisions his slave has made.  He is in control of deciding how much decision-making power she has.  She uses her good decision-making skills for his benefit by doing alot of legwork that he chooses not to do.  Then, when the final decision needs to be made, he comes in and has final say and decision-making power.  That's how it works for Master and I. 

Sure, He could insist on never letting me make a decision and He could spend all His time making all of them.  That wasn't what He sought in having a slave.  He wants someone with a brain whom He can trust to use it.  He tells me what decisions I am responsible for and expects me to make good ones.  I do and that, thereby, saves Him alot of time doing things.  It doesn't make Him one iota less "masterly" to have a smart, decision-making slave because I still operate well within the parameters He Himself has established.  Just a different perspective...............luci


As a Dom once told me, "There is being in control, and then there is being a "Micro-managing anal retentive control freak. Just as there is difference between being a Dominant and being a domineering ass-hat."

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(in reply to slaveluci)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Money in 24/7 or TPE - 10/28/2007 1:32:33 PM   
ruri


Posts: 19
Joined: 10/26/2007
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I would rather keep our finances seperate - I insist. I am capable of submitting and handling my own life thank you very much. Not that other subs here aren't, but that's what I'd say to any Dom who suggested handling my finances.

(in reply to bbwsubnnorcal)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Money in 24/7 or TPE - 10/28/2007 2:36:45 PM   
slaveluci


Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
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quote:

ORIGINAL: bbwsubnnorcal
As a Dom once told me, "There is being in control, and then there is being a "Micro-managing anal retentive control freak. Just as there is difference between being a Dominant and being a domineering ass-hat."

....very true.  Master just doesn't see it as good service to Him if He has to do all the thinking..........luci

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To choose a good book, look in an inquisitor’s prohibited list. ~John Aikin

(in reply to bbwsubnnorcal)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Money in 24/7 or TPE - 10/28/2007 2:42:31 PM   
slaveluci


Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
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quote:

ORIGINAL: ruri
I am capable of submitting and handling my own life thank you very much. Not that other subs here aren't, but that's what I'd say to any Dom who suggested handling my finances

If that's what you insist upon and feel you need, you have every right to look for that in a dom.  I'm very capable of handling my own life and finances as well but I enjoy bringing home a paycheck that's nearly as much as Master's, handing it to Him, and knowing that He's going to use it as He sees fit.  The best part of that is knowing that I can trust Him to not squander it and that He'll oversee my contribution to our household better than I would have.  Not that I'm a money-waster or one to go in debt - I'm absolutely not - but He just keeps a better handle on it that I would.  We each have our strengths and that just happens to be one of His.  Plus, it reinforces His ownership and control of me for me to have to ask for money to spend rather than just being able to spend whatever and whenever I choose.  He's very generous and I never go without needs, but being required to ask is just part of how it works around here...............luci

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(in reply to ruri)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Money in 24/7 or TPE - 10/28/2007 2:47:55 PM   
winterlight


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ok, this freaks me out. I know of cases where she the sub/slave hands over the money and He squanders it. He invests it and it is gone.

no thank you very much!  I will handle my own money and as far as i am concerned it is MY Money and MY retirement money. If the realationship goes south I am not kicked out to the streets penniless.

I don't mind contributing to the Household etc. or putting part towards expenses but this totally freaks me out...There are too many variables in life...

(in reply to BeingChewsie)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Money in 24/7 or TPE - 10/28/2007 2:57:31 PM   
ruri


Posts: 19
Joined: 10/26/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: slaveluci

quote:

ORIGINAL: ruri
I am capable of submitting and handling my own life thank you very much. Not that other subs here aren't, but that's what I'd say to any Dom who suggested handling my finances

If that's what you insist upon and feel you need, you have every right to look for that in a dom.  I'm very capable of handling my own life and finances as well but I enjoy bringing home a paycheck that's nearly as much as Master's, handing it to Him, and knowing that He's going to use it as He sees fit.  The best part of that is knowing that I can trust Him to not squander it and that He'll oversee my contribution to our household better than I would have.  Not that I'm a money-waster or one to go in debt - I'm absolutely not - but He just keeps a better handle on it that I would.  We each have our strengths and that just happens to be one of His.  Plus, it reinforces His ownership and control of me for me to have to ask for money to spend rather than just being able to spend whatever and whenever I choose.  He's very generous and I never go without needs, but being required to ask is just part of how it works around here...............luci

Yes, some relationships are better with one person handling all the finances. If it makes you feel more owned, and he likes having that control, then go with it.





(in reply to slaveluci)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Money in 24/7 or TPE - 10/28/2007 2:58:05 PM   
therealboss


Posts: 227
Joined: 9/11/2007
Status: offline
i wont have someone like you anyway

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Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Money in 24/7 or TPE - 10/28/2007 3:03:03 PM   
slaveluci


Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: winterlight
ok, this freaks me out. I know of cases where she the sub/slave hands over the money and He squanders it. He invests it and it is gone

I understand your point here.  I really do.  But, in my case, I wouldn't be owned by a man unless I could trust Him with my life.  Trusting Him with "my" money is the least of it.  Now, if things hadn't progressed to ownership and we were less serious......my money would be under my own control.  But, since nothing else in my life is still under my own control, my paycheck certainly isn't either.
quote:

If the realationship goes south I am not kicked out to the streets penniless

That's why it pays to be involved in a relationship where you're as certain as you can be that it won't "go south."  Of course there are never any 100% guarantees, I suppose, but not only am I as sure as I can be that ours won't but, even if it did, I know His character well enough to know I wouldn't be thrown penniless to the wolves.  I don't see that there is anymore chance of this happening in BDSM relationships than in vanilla ones - maybe even less.
quote:

There are too many variables in life...

True but choosing the right partner can eliminate many of them............luci

_____________________________

To choose a good book, look in an inquisitor’s prohibited list. ~John Aikin

(in reply to winterlight)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Money in 24/7 or TPE - 10/28/2007 3:05:31 PM   
liljoy


Posts: 577
Joined: 3/25/2004
Status: offline
it's my job to make sure household bills are taken care of. We have seperate accounts. He gives me money each week to put in my account towards the house bills. If i want to buy anything that cost more than $30 i need permission.

(in reply to ruri)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Money in 24/7 or TPE - 10/28/2007 3:06:00 PM   
MasterDaveM


Posts: 78
Joined: 12/5/2006
From: Tampa
Status: offline
in the end, let the person who is most "money wise" handle the money lol

just because he is a dom doesnt make him "fiscally responsible"

(in reply to slaveluci)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Money in 24/7 or TPE - 10/28/2007 3:07:00 PM   
slaveluci


Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ruri
If it makes you feel more owned, and he likes having that control, then go with it

I'm not sure I'd say "more owned."  That's kind of like saying "a little bit pregnant."  One either IS owned or ISN'T, I suppose.  It's not that it makes me feel "more" owned, but it certainly reinforces the ownership that is in place.  Just one of many things that reminds me daily who is really in control................luci

_____________________________

To choose a good book, look in an inquisitor’s prohibited list. ~John Aikin

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Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Money in 24/7 or TPE - 10/28/2007 3:09:57 PM   
ruri


Posts: 19
Joined: 10/26/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: slaveluci

quote:

ORIGINAL: ruri
If it makes you feel more owned, and he likes having that control, then go with it

I'm not sure I'd say "more owned."  That's kind of like saying "a little bit pregnant."  One either IS owned or ISN'T, I suppose.  It's not that it makes me feel "more" owned, but it certainly reinforces the ownership that is in place.  Just one of many things that reminds me daily who is really in control................luci

I'm sure it works out nice for a lot of people.

:)

(in reply to slaveluci)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: Money in 24/7 or TPE - 10/28/2007 4:21:56 PM   
unsureslave


Posts: 17
Joined: 10/20/2007
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what about a Master taking care of  His slave?  i have only known my Master for a bit over 2 weeks now and will start training in mid-november...   in my daily emails i had mentioned i was worried about a few of my bills because my business has been slow and i am still waiting for several clients to pay me.   just friday i received a letter from my Master along with 1000 euros, and i must admit i was rather shocked.  i certainly didnt ask for it and it was about 3x the amount i needed.  He said He was taking care of His property and did not want me to be distracted or worried about My bills during training.   i'm just curious if this is also common for M/s relationships?

(in reply to ruri)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: Money in 24/7 or TPE - 10/28/2007 4:26:30 PM   
MasterDaveM


Posts: 78
Joined: 12/5/2006
From: Tampa
Status: offline
quote:

just friday i received a letter from my Master along with 1000 euros,


$2000 US is certainly a gracious gift and i dont know how long you 2 have known each other nor if you have ever met in real life. i would caution him against sending money overseas and i would caution you about feeling "bought and paid for" mentalities if you decide this is not for you and he feels "but i gave you cash bitch... you owe me"


(in reply to unsureslave)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: Money in 24/7 or TPE - 10/28/2007 4:32:08 PM   
therealboss


Posts: 227
Joined: 9/11/2007
Status: offline
my slave have to tribute me

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be the best

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Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Money in 24/7 or TPE - 10/28/2007 6:37:58 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: unsureslave
what about a Master taking care of  His slave?  i have only known my Master for a bit over 2 weeks now and will start training in mid-november...   in my daily emails i had mentioned i was worried about a few of my bills because my business has been slow and i am still waiting for several clients to pay me.   just friday i received a letter from my Master along with 1000 euros, and i must admit i was rather shocked.  i certainly didnt ask for it and it was about 3x the amount i needed.  He said He was taking care of His property and did not want me to be distracted or worried about My bills during training.   i'm just curious if this is also common for M/s relationships?

It's common for those involved in healthy long lasting relationships to support eachother in times of need.

This particular action however I would not call very common however.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to unsureslave)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Money in 24/7 or TPE - 10/28/2007 6:42:58 PM   
RRafe


Posts: 2060
Joined: 8/29/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ruri

I would rather keep our finances seperate - I insist. I am capable of submitting and handling my own life thank you very much. Not that other subs here aren't, but that's what I'd say to any Dom who suggested handling my finances.


Ditto-no one should feel that thier relationship is based on monetary value. It's better if everyone has ther finances sorted out for themselves-none of us live forever.

_____________________________

I seem to be some wierd combination of Ren and Stimpy

(in reply to ruri)
Profile   Post #: 57
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