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orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 10/29/2007 4:14:57 PM   
jmig033


Posts: 29
Joined: 10/29/2007
Status: offline 		i am about to embark on a difficult journey.  in about 48 hrs my penis will no longer belong to me and i will be forced to ask permission for every orgasm.  additionally, i will not be allowed to view any pornography (without permission) and must give my mistress massages on demand.  i thoroughly enjoy the pleasure of intense pain so naturally my punishment, should i choose to disobey her orders, would have nothing to do with pain.  instead i was told i would be simply bound naked and left for at least an hour, then denied an orgasm.
 
my question for the Mistresses is do you have experience with orgasm control you would be willing to share with me and what have you done to discourage disobedience in your submissives? 
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RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 10/29/2007 4:23:31 PM   
HottLicks


Posts: 174
Joined: 9/21/2007
Status: offline 		Well it seems you are still okay to post and read this since you are before that 48 hour deadline. lol  Get it while the gettin's good, cause this thread might not be allowed later. lol  If it were me imposing all this... I would be laughing so hard at this and planning accordingly! lol  You would so pay for this! lol

(in reply to jmig033)
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RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 10/29/2007 4:46:02 PM   
jmig033


Posts: 29
Joined: 10/29/2007
Status: offline 		I actually asked for permission just in case….but I have a feeling you are right HottLicks, this may get me in trouble anyway. 
 
The bind is I will be pretty horny and think about looking at porn or masturbating.  Realizing I am not allowed to do either will make me even more excited, and round and round I go. 

(in reply to HottLicks)
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RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 10/29/2007 4:57:30 PM   
HottLicks


Posts: 174
Joined: 9/21/2007
Status: offline 		lol Well, whatever the case may be... don't expect much here.  Your first post kind of sounds like wanking material and I doubt you're going to get much help here.  If indeed there is a mistress... and you do get some responses... I am enjoying the thought of what I would be doing and that I am not going to tell you.  I do find it strange that a mistress would set this up quite like this unless you were being set up. lol

(in reply to jmig033)
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RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 10/29/2007 6:05:44 PM   
jmig033


Posts: 29
Joined: 10/29/2007
Status: offline 		wanking material?  whats wrong with that?  J
 
do i have a professional mistress?  no.  my wife is my mistress but we both contribute to our fantasies.  this idea was mostly mine, but she added a few devious things of her own.  i was hoping to learn from the experiences of others and incorporate it into our game but completely understand your skepticism.
 
wow, i would really love to know what you would do or have done- at the very least i am glad you got some enjoyment out of it J
 
thanks for taking the time to respond HottLicks! 

(in reply to HottLicks)
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RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 10/29/2007 6:46:58 PM   
rob425


Posts: 154
Joined: 12/1/2005
Status: offline 		Look into buying a chasity belt like the CB3000 or CB6000....That is how one of my old domme's controlled mine back in the day, I also have the self restraint to not touch

(in reply to jmig033)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 10/29/2007 7:18:28 PM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: jmig033

I actually asked for permission just in case….but I have a feeling you are right HottLicks, this may get me in trouble anyway.

The bind is I will be pretty horny and think about looking at porn or masturbating. Realizing I am not allowed to do either will make me even more excited, and round and round I go.


Over time I think your horniness will decrease as not having control or access to pornography becomes the standard, daily routine. One slave I know whose master has controlled his orgasm for almost ten years now says that frankly within a year he didn't even miss any more. Being sexual aroused just became another service he could supply to his master but didn't feel the need for on his own. He didn't seem turned on or off or anything about it because it is simply how things are now.

Personally I have never found orgasm control unless I'm immediately there to be interesting or useful but then I tend to choose submissives whose submission is not directly connected to their sex drive but to serving or SM or other activities.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to jmig033)
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RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 10/29/2007 9:32:47 PM   
MsIncontrol


Posts: 261
Joined: 10/3/2007
Status: offline 		I use orgasm control in my current relationship.  It isn't so much about stopping him from using his penis, but more so to make sure it is available for my pleasure on command.  I have found, like I am sure many other dominants here, that most mens submission is much stronger and intense before orgasm.  So denial and control of said orgasm is to keep our submissives in a space to allow them to serve us better.

I have used chastity in the past with other submissives and found that using in short term situations (week to a month) is wonderful but long term didn't have the impact I would have hoped for. 

As far as punishments go, the most painful for my submissive is when I deny him time with me and time to serve me.  He would gladly take a beating...but it pains him most to be denied servitude so that is my most powerful form of punishment.

_____________________________

Happiness is only real when shared. - Christopher McCandless

(in reply to thetammyjo)
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RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 10/29/2007 10:45:52 PM   
PhoenixRed


Posts: 174
Joined: 10/7/2007
Status: offline 		To the OP:
I haven't yet practice orgasm restriction, (i.e., locking them in chastity) on any of my own.  However, I have communicated for quite a while with a slave that has been locked up and only allowed "out" for very short periods of time. He said that he used to masturbate almost every day and that the initial transition was a bit difficult.  Over time, though, he has stated that it makes him a better slave, because he is now more focused on the needs of his Mistress instead of on his own.  He also stated that he really relishes and has a more intense orgasm when he is allowed to cum.  Just my .02 cents worth.

_____________________________

Everyone deserves a break from the person everyone else expects them to be.
In the great experiment known as evolution, evidently there are some people who's ancestors were in the control group.

(in reply to jmig033)
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RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 10/29/2007 11:14:09 PM   
needDomme


Posts: 115
Joined: 4/8/2006
Status: offline 		Orgasm control is a strong tool. It definitely makes me more submissive and puts me in subspace. Orgasm conrol is total control. I would agree, however, that long term might reverse the effects.

need

(in reply to MsIncontrol)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 10/30/2007 2:44:19 AM   
MsCfromMelbourne


Posts: 777
Joined: 2/15/2007
Status: offline 		Well my partner has been asking permission to orgasm for over a year now and its no big deal.   He never was a sneaky-wank-in-the-shower type anyway.

Before being given to me, he belonged to a pro-domme who kept him locked in a CB3000 up to a month at a time.  She had a husband so he wasn't useful in that way (and he wasn't attracted to her that way at all, so it was win-win).  She put the big bitey teeth in the CB3000 so an erection really hurt (so much so he would wake up at night in pain)

Now I am not criticising any of his former owners, but my sub has a low sex drive for a 40 year old man.  He can go 2 weeks and not even think about sex much less need it.

Do you know what its like to own a man who does not need sex?  Its disempowering.  A Domme's easiest power base - male lust - is not one of the tools ever available to you.

He still absolutely loves his nasty little CB3000, but I don't let him have it anymore.  I am not one of these asexual Dommes, so male chastity doesn't serve me any useful purpose


_____________________________

<----- Corset, mask and collar designed and manufactured by metalsmith Karl H, chromed and lined in black suede. Masks and collars available from http://www.lucreziadesade.com.au/default.html. Corsets custom made only

(in reply to needDomme)
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RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 10/30/2007 6:24:42 AM   
Oumae


Posts: 911
Joined: 1/4/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MsCfromMelbourne



I am not one of these asexual Dommes, so male chastity doesn't serve me any useful purpose



I'm with you on that!

I have also come across subs who have been left for long periods of time in chastity who have lost sex drive, so while I will use orgasm control and make a sub ask to cum I don't tend to leave them too long between orgasms as I want them in working order.

Oumae



_____________________________

Is cuma le fear na mbrog ca leagann se a chos.
( The man with the boots does not mind where he places his foot)

(in reply to MsCfromMelbourne)
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RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 10/30/2007 7:08:30 AM   
Smythe


Posts: 369
Joined: 12/31/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Oumae

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsCfromMelbourne



I am not one of these asexual Dommes, so male chastity doesn't serve me any useful purpose



I'm with you on that!

I have also come across subs who have been left for long periods of time in chastity who have lost sex drive, so while I will use orgasm control and make a sub ask to cum I don't tend to leave them too long between orgasms as I want them in working order.

Oumae


Me 3. I love orgasm control but I like to keep the juices flowing, so to speak. Over time, my submissive has been trained to know that he will have release, but only when I allow it. Otherwise, nothing is to happen, and he is very good, without a chastity device.

MsC from M: Have you tried a systematic program of increasing his sex drive? If he was ruined by his previous owners in that regard, I bet you can fix things.
Smythe



_____________________________

Do not consider painful what is good for you.
Euripides

(in reply to Oumae)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 10/30/2007 7:11:07 AM   
LotusSong


Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: jmig033

i am about to embark on a difficult journey.  in about 48 hrs my penis will no longer belong to me and i will be forced to ask permission for every orgasm.  additionally, i will not be allowed to view any pornography (without permission) and must give my mistress massages on demand.  i thoroughly enjoy the pleasure of intense pain so naturally my punishment, should i choose to disobey her orders, would have nothing to do with pain.  instead i was told i would be simply bound naked and left for at least an hour, then denied an orgasm.
 
my question for the Mistresses is do you have experience with orgasm control you would be willing to share with me and what have you done to discourage disobedience in your submissives? 


The preliminary mind fuck is complete :)  Keeping you focused on what COULD happen is worst than pain.. no? :)

_____________________________

Life Lesson #1

I'm not your type.
I'm not inflatable.


(in reply to jmig033)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 10/30/2007 6:42:29 PM   
jmig033


Posts: 29
Joined: 10/29/2007
Status: offline 		Wow, thank you for all the great responses!

The preliminary mind fuck is complete – well said.  Hopefully, she does not force me to do this for too long.  I, as some of you have mentioned, would worry that my level of arousal and excitement would diminish after awhile. 

So the goal here is to explore our relationship in a new way ~ uncharted waters if you will.  As MsIncontrol mentioned, I will be completely available for my wife’s pleasure. 

(in reply to LotusSong)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 10/30/2007 7:19:00 PM   
Alecto


Posts: 8
Joined: 1/20/2007
Status: offline 		I have a question on a separate but related note: how does one increase a male sub's sex drive? The person I'm currently seeing is over 40 and can really only manage to get an erection once a week (in my presence, natch). After all, it's easy to control a man's orgasm if he's only capable of having one a week! I think he has a naturally low sex drive (and he does occasionally "waste" some of it on his vanilla wife).
Also, do any of my fellow Dominas ever feel "less dominant" (gasp) if their male sub has a low sex drive? How do you handle it?

_____________________________

"I've always known I was meant to dominate your sex and avenge my own." -- Marquise de Merteuil

(in reply to jmig033)
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RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 10/30/2007 7:26:52 PM   
therealboss


Posts: 227
Joined: 9/11/2007
Status: offline 		use the cain my dear,fear or pleasure should work,but remember to enjoy yourself

_____________________________

be the best

(in reply to Alecto)
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RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 10/30/2007 7:49:17 PM   
TPESOSWanted


Posts: 22
Joined: 9/9/2007
Status: offline 		So ... you are in favor of beating someone with the dead body of Adam & Eve?
quote:

ORIGINAL: therealboss
use the cain my dear

(in reply to therealboss)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 10/30/2007 8:05:50 PM   
Zaraseeks


Posts: 130
Joined: 9/5/2007
Status: offline 		Hmm, well this is coming froma female,so may be different.  My ex Mistress used alot of orgasam control, er, denial.  Every night I was to make Her cum, and normally several times, She would then tease me, get me close and send me to bed.  Worked WONDERS at first,...Then after a few years of cumming a handful of times, and mostly by my own hand (yes with permission) as She slept next to me, resentments formed, as a female I didnt feel desired.  My sex drive wasnt CLOSE to what it was, ie, before I would always want to go down on Her, fuck Her, please Her.  It became more like a chore after so long.  I wouldnt recommend anyone do what She did.

In turn with my current Mistress, and sex partners after it almost feels dirty having them get ME off, I am now trying to overcome this dislike for oral (I mean really, a girl who doesnt like oral)  Needless to say the effects were damaging, and added to the damages of Oour relationship.

But to each their own, and mind Yyou, I know this was fully Her right as I had made it Her right. thus it continued for 5 years
lil zara

(in reply to TPESOSWanted)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 10/30/2007 8:10:36 PM   
Zaraseeks


Posts: 130
Joined: 9/5/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Alecto

I have a question on a separate but related note: how does one increase a male sub's sex drive? The person I'm currently seeing is over 40 and can really only manage to get an erection once a week (in my presence, natch). After all, it's easy to control a man's orgasm if he's only capable of having one a week! I think he has a naturally low sex drive (and he does occasionally "waste" some of it on his vanilla wife).
Also, do any of my fellow Dominas ever feel "less dominant" (gasp) if their male sub has a low sex drive? How do you handle it?

I would recommend forcing him to "get it up" and cum, i think the more one cums (over time) the more one will want to cum, also figure out what REALLY turns him on, be it an email exchange of a fantasy, or whatever, I use it with alot of clients, and they say it has increased their sex drive a ton, in fact one is to the point where he can have several orgasams in an hour, not fast ones either, he just keeps going, and this is by his own hand...its all about getting in their head and finding what makes em tick Good luck!

(in reply to Alecto)
Profile   Post #: 20
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