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RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 10/30/2007 8:55:32 PM   
ededwards


Posts: 51
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline
quote:

He can go 2 weeks and not even think about sex much less need it.


Retrain him to crave sex.

(in reply to MsCfromMelbourne)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 10/31/2007 2:55:27 AM   
MsCfromMelbourne


Posts: 777
Joined: 2/15/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ededwards

quote:

He can go 2 weeks and not even think about sex much less need it.


Retrain him to crave sex.



Uh...huh.  Do you have useful website for that? Any ideas that have worked over at your house?

I am telling you, its just not that easy.  Our culture preaches that "real men" are virile, hard as a rock and ready to go....anywhere, anytime.  People just cannot get their heads around the possibility of a guy who really does not need or want much sex. 

I raised the question back in February here in Ask A Mistress and got several very helpful replies  http://www.collarchat.com/m_836206/mpage_1/tm.htm

For what its worth, we are expecting our first baby in March (and are thrilled!), so his plumbing might not work as often as other subs, but he sure ain't shooting blanks!!!!





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(in reply to ededwards)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 10/31/2007 5:49:12 AM   
Cissykay1999


Posts: 61
Joined: 10/9/2007
Status: offline 		I have had two major surgeries because of circulation problems, and one left me with erectile dysfunction. I still have the desire and I get the sensation, I just can't get an erection. There was a time when a chastity device interested me greatly, but since I had the first surgery, I find that my desire to masterbate has increased greatly. Now, a chastity device and orgasm control scares me to death. I believe that a Mistress can bebefit from using a chastity belt on a male sub. Bye the way, I'm well over 40.

(in reply to jmig033)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 10/31/2007 9:51:30 AM   
ricar00


Posts: 45
Joined: 2/11/2006
Status: offline 		i have two comments.
First, i once had a short time relationship with a domme who did the opposite of denying orgasmic control. She was a clever young domme, knowing i was older. She made me try to have an orgasm 8 times a day and that was not easy and sometimes panicked me, especially when working a 40 to 50 hour a week job.

Second, for me the hardest punishment is being ignored or told that i cannot communicate with my Goddess.  It is horrible and made me distraught. But i learned my lesson and never doubted her authority.

ricar00

(in reply to MsIncontrol)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 10/31/2007 10:17:07 AM   
PoeticPrincess


Posts: 49
Joined: 10/21/2006
Status: offline 		Fantastically practical and helpful answer, MsC - Surely making one's slave go one year without an orgasm is not the sort of cruel and unusual punishment anyone would desire? To take away another persons sexuality seems a very hard thing to do, and I cannot understand why anyone would benefit, least of all his Domme.

(in reply to MsCfromMelbourne)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 10/31/2007 10:56:56 AM   
OneSlvman


Posts: 5
Joined: 10/2/2007
Status: offline 		i am locked in a cb 6000 permanently and i still have a sex drive and wake up at night with the pressure early in the morning.  The teasing and interaction with my lady keeps it alive.
slave

(in reply to Zaraseeks)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 10/31/2007 3:23:03 PM   
alittlebent


Posts: 44
Joined: 10/9/2006
Status: offline 		viagra works wonders for the low sex drive.
 
razi

(in reply to OneSlvman)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 10/31/2007 7:29:24 PM   
feralcat


Posts: 116
Joined: 10/22/2005
Status: offline 		I think my boy would agree with you on the "no contact" with me as being a very bad punishment.

Now as far as torture goes,ever been teased into a frenzy and then have your precious orgasm WRECKED? My boy will tell you it is a damn awful feeling.

(I refrained from putting up the" horned devil smiling"smiley...it just seems so wrong! hahahaha)

MsFeral....waiting for the Locked in Steel chasity belt to be finished!

(in reply to ricar00)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 11/1/2007 1:04:34 PM   
MystressDream


Posts: 345
Joined: 7/11/2004
From: Colorado
Status: offline 		Hmmm.... Am I the only one who takes exception to the comment "and he does occasionally "waste" some of it on his vanilla wife"???

I admire a vanilla wife who would allow her husband to have a Mistress on the side and not resent his need for that in his life.

No attention to a wife is a waste, IMO.

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(in reply to Alecto)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 11/1/2007 1:48:22 PM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MystressDream

Hmmm.... Am I the only one who takes exception to the comment "and he does occasionally "waste" some of it on his vanilla wife"???

I admire a vanilla wife who would allow her husband to have a Mistress on the side and not resent his need for that in his life.

No attention to a wife is a waste, IMO.


I agree.

My question would be how much his wife does know and consent.

Sounds like the very idea of it being a "waste" may be a reflect of discomfort with the situation on the side one or several parties involved. Rarely a good thing in my experience.

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(in reply to MystressDream)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 11/1/2007 2:01:18 PM   
ededwards


Posts: 51
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline
quote:

Uh...huh. Do you have useful website for that? Any ideas that have worked over at your house?


For what its worth.....

I ahve used classical conditioning for myself in areas other than sex drive and it has worked well.

This one is technical but covers the science ok.

http://members.tripod.com/rbt/

This one has someinteresting practical advice. I especiallly like the use of a specific place that a person has been conditioned to respond with arousal.


http://www.psywww.com/intropsych/ch16_sfl/what_causes_sexual_excitement.html



(in reply to MsCfromMelbourne)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 11/1/2007 5:30:54 PM   
pinksissyPA


Posts: 90
Joined: 6/2/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MsCfromMelbourne

quote:

ORIGINAL: ededwards

quote:

He can go 2 weeks and not even think about sex much less need it.


Retrain him to crave sex.



Uh...huh.  Do you have useful website for that? Any ideas that have worked over at your house?

I am telling you, its just not that easy.  Our culture preaches that "real men" are virile, hard as a rock and ready to go....anywhere, anytime.  People just cannot get their heads around the possibility of a guy who really does not need or want much sex. 

I raised the question back in February here in Ask A Mistress and got several very helpful replies  http://www.collarchat.com/m_836206/mpage_1/tm.htm

For what its worth, we are expecting our first baby in March (and are thrilled!), so his plumbing might not work as often as other subs, but he sure ain't shooting blanks!!!!






Ms C,

i have been in chastity to a Domme vseveral times.  It can be very controlling and humbling for a few hours but by second day it becomes painful as blood flow is constricted to the penis.  Fortunately. for me, i have never been in chastisty more than 2 days.  However, i know sub males who have been in chastity for much longer periods.  Periods of up to a week or a few months.  They have told me that after a week, their sex drive declines and are unable to perform more than once or thrice a week and never more than once a night.

Viagra probably would help them but there are health risks associated with that.  From what i know and been told i would be very leary of any Domme that required Her sub to be in chastity regularly or for more than a day at a time.

Respectfully,

pink

(in reply to MsCfromMelbourne)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 11/2/2007 5:45:06 AM   
beeble


Posts: 799
Joined: 5/25/2005
From: UK
Status: offline
quote:

alittlebent wrote: viagra works wonders for the low sex drive.

No.  Viagra works wonders for erectile disfunction.  It fixes ``I want to have sex but I can't,'' not ``I'm not interested in sex.''

(in reply to alittlebent)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 11/3/2007 4:16:18 AM   
beeble


Posts: 799
Joined: 5/25/2005
From: UK
Status: offline
quote:

therealboss wrote: use the cain my dear

I'm not abel to do that, sorry.

(in reply to therealboss)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 11/3/2007 4:53:49 AM   
sammiebabygirl


Posts: 465
Joined: 10/23/2004
From: Upstate, NY
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: jmig033

  i thoroughly enjoy the pleasure of intense pain so naturally my punishment, should i choose to disobey her orders, would have nothing to do with pain.  instead i was told i would be simply bound naked and left for at least an hour, then denied an orgasm.
 


On a safety note, please make sure that she does not go too far while you are bound.
 
On a sadistic note, while you are naked and bound, have her sprinkle some itching powder on your penis and then deny your orgasm. {WEG}
 
http://funanticstoys.com/ITCHING-POWDER/M/B000LZAYDC.htm
 
jen

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(in reply to jmig033)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 11/3/2007 8:26:44 AM   
beeble


Posts: 799
Joined: 5/25/2005
From: UK
Status: offline 		You're hoping that, since this itching powder is presumably aimed at children, it won't say ``Not for genital use'' on the packaging? 

< Message edited by beeble -- 11/3/2007 8:27:18 AM >

(in reply to sammiebabygirl)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 11/30/2007 3:09:41 PM   
jmig033


Posts: 29
Joined: 10/29/2007
Status: offline 		Itching powder- yikes I hope she doesn’t read that J.
 
To give you an update, my Goddess is still in full control of me.  It has been a month and I have learned much about service and pleasing my Goddess without my interest as a motivating factor. 
 
Last night I was punished because I displeased my Goddess.  Feralcat asked…
 
“Now as far as torture goes,ever been teased into a frenzy and then have your precious orgasm WRECKED?”
 
Yes!  It happened to me last night and it was devastating.  I learned my lesson.  As part of my punishment last night I was continuously brought to the brink of satisfaction only to be denied and ultimately send to bed. 
 
I did notice as the weeks went on that my level of arousal began to decrease since I went from daily orgasms to once a week.  To remedy my decreased sex drive my Goddess ordered me to give myself daily orgasms for a week.  That definitely did the trick.   
 
Thanks for all of your responses and I look forward to reading more!!

(in reply to beeble)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 12/1/2007 1:57:56 PM   
Reigna


Posts: 334
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Alecto

I have a question on a separate but related note: how does one increase a male sub's sex drive?


It's relatively common for men of any flavor to begin having erectile problems around this age. That's what Viagra is for, and it works beautifully. It won't increase his sex drive per se, but it will increase his ability to perform to your satisfaction.

(in reply to Alecto)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: orgasm control and submissive disobedience - 12/1/2007 2:00:19 PM   
Reigna


Posts: 334
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: beeble

quote:

therealboss wrote: use the cain my dear

I'm not abel to do that, sorry.



You deserve a good spanking for that one.

(in reply to beeble)
Profile   Post #: 39
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