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Words - 10/30/2007 9:21:10 AM

Dnomyar

Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
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After sending time on here both posting and reading post I began notice how certain words affect people. Switch, Under consideration, Player, ect. ect. What word/words get you worked up and why? Should you not ask the context the word is being used in before shooting a flaming arrow. Why even get worked up over a word anyway.

Post #: 1

RE: Words - 10/30/2007 9:24:14 AM

camille65

Posts: 5746
Joined: 7/11/2007
From: Austin Texas
Status: offline

I think people assume that the context within their words is automatically understood.
Then that leads to the other side, people reading words tend to automatically use their definitions.

I have no idea why certain words bring out the worst in people and I really wish it could be eliminated. I guess it is just being used to having ones own POV and not readily stepping into another one.

_____________________________

~Love your life! (It is the only one you'll get).

(in reply to Dnomyar)

Post #: 2

RE: Words - 10/30/2007 9:26:21 AM

batshalom

Posts: 1990
Joined: 9/17/2007
Status: offline

Eh Dnomyar (omg, I just "got" your handle) ...

Getting whipped up over a word and not knowing the background / context is built into us from guzzling the news like we do. Remember 1984's 60-second hate? We hear hot-button words and phrases and incorporate them and respond to them whether or not we actually agree with it. Only thing is, we're so inundated with it that it becomes a trigger with no real oomph to the explosion.

(in reply to Dnomyar)

Post #: 3

RE: Words - 10/30/2007 10:22:48 AM

SmokingGun82

Posts: 575
Joined: 6/19/2004
Status: offline

There are an unlimited number of words that whip me into a frenzy... essentially any word that obviously doesn't mean what the user thought it did. The word "time" is a recent example... someone told me they didn't have time to discuss something, when they definitely meant desire, intelligence, or any of a dozen other words.

So it's not words in particular that drive me crazy, but sloppy usage.

_____________________________

It frightens me, the awful truth of how sweet life can be.
- Bob Dylan

Proper capitalization is the difference between "I had to help my Uncle Jack off a horse" and "I had to help my uncle jack off a horse."

(in reply to batshalom)

Post #: 4

RE: Words - 10/30/2007 10:26:57 AM

ownedgirlie

Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: batshalom

Eh Dnomyar (omg, I just "got" your handle) ...

Getting whipped up over a word and not knowing the background / context is built into us from guzzling the news like we do. Remember 1984's 60-second hate? We hear hot-button words and phrases and incorporate them and respond to them whether or not we actually agree with it. Only thing is, we're so inundated with it that it becomes a trigger with no real oomph to the explosion.

Loved this post.

I think words trigger emotions (often times unresolved emotions) in people that are brewing just beneath the surface, waiting for an invitation to the outside.

A lot of my former trigger-words were baggage related. Now I see words as words. It's the intent behind them that has my interest.

(in reply to batshalom)

Post #: 5

RE: Words - 10/30/2007 10:38:16 AM

MadameMarque

Posts: 1128
Joined: 3/19/2005
Status: offline

What I am is just plain scared, for those who will suffer from the terrible misuse and misunderstanding I've seen, of the words "consensual," "nonconsensual," "real slavery," and "punishment."

And, also, the resurgence of pride in sexism, under the use of the phrase, "natural order." You know what other form of discrimination used to use that concept, as their rationale?

There is, in fact, power in words.

(in reply to Dnomyar)

Post #: 6

RE: Words - 10/30/2007 11:29:26 AM

SmokingGun82

Posts: 575
Joined: 6/19/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MadameMarque
And, also, the resurgence of pride in sexism, under the use of the phrase, "natural order." You know what other form of discrimination used to use that concept, as their rationale?

An excellent example of Godwin's law. And possibly the silliest Nazi comparison I've seen in weeks.

Words only have the power you give them. And if they actually scare you, you need some professional help. They're pixels on a screen, a screen you can turn off at any time... why would that scare you?

_____________________________

It frightens me, the awful truth of how sweet life can be.
- Bob Dylan

Proper capitalization is the difference between "I had to help my Uncle Jack off a horse" and "I had to help my uncle jack off a horse."

(in reply to MadameMarque)

Post #: 7

RE: Words - 10/30/2007 11:38:26 AM

toservez

Posts: 1733
Joined: 9/7/2006
From: All over now in Minnesota
Status: offline

The word natural always gets me on edge. There is such a wide range of what everyone does on here from the specific kinks and the varying degree of power exchange in relationships that this word gets interjected to me often in the wrong way. We pretty much have to be naturally dominant and submissive to live this life but a lot of us who live this, the actual things done are not necessarily natural. I find often too many people use the word natural to romanticize their relationship and it often gives off a false impression of the effort and work we put into these relationships. That people new to the life struggle thinking there should be no learning curve and for severe power exchange relationships to feel guilty if they need certain things to enjoy that level because they read or hear how everything is just so natural.

The other word I dislike is protection. If a person needs protection then it has nothing to do with this life. Whether you are a dominant, friend, family member, or professional help if a person truly needs someone to protect themselves from themselves then this is about the person’s mental health and nothing to do with this life. If one is protecting someone in terms of this life only then they could vary well be part of the problem and not part of the solution.

_____________________________

I am sorry I do not fit Webster's defintion of a slave but thankfully my Master is not Webster.

"Anything that contradicts experience and logic should be abandoned." - H.H. The 14th Dalai Lama

(in reply to Dnomyar)

Post #: 8

RE: Words - 10/30/2007 11:40:05 AM

RRafe

Posts: 2060
Joined: 8/29/2007
Status: offline

"gift" get me going.

I hate bait and switch tactics.

_____________________________

I seem to be some wierd combination of Ren and Stimpy

(in reply to toservez)

Post #: 9

RE: Words - 10/30/2007 11:43:31 AM

meticulousgirl

Posts: 969
Joined: 2/20/2007
Status: offline

amazing isn't it?

~meticulous~

(in reply to RRafe)

Post #: 10

RE: Words - 10/30/2007 11:43:40 AM

MadRabbit

Posts: 3460
Joined: 8/9/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie

quote:

ORIGINAL: batshalom

Eh Dnomyar (omg, I just "got" your handle) ...

Getting whipped up over a word and not knowing the background / context is built into us from guzzling the news like we do. Remember 1984's 60-second hate? We hear hot-button words and phrases and incorporate them and respond to them whether or not we actually agree with it. Only thing is, we're so inundated with it that it becomes a trigger with no real oomph to the explosion.

Loved this post.

I think words trigger emotions (often times unresolved emotions) in people that are brewing just beneath the surface, waiting for an invitation to the outside.

A lot of my former trigger-words were baggage related. Now I see words as words. It's the intent behind them that has my interest.

Its True! Its True! Oh sooo True, True, True, True! I dont think it could be any more True given how True it is. True, True, True, True, True, True, True, True, True!

_____________________________

Advice for New Dominants
The Unpolitically Correct Lifestyle Definitions

Obama is NOT the Messiah! He's just a VERY NAUGHTY BOY

(in reply to ownedgirlie)

Post #: 11

RE: Words - 10/30/2007 11:45:18 AM

MadameMarque

Posts: 1128
Joined: 3/19/2005
Status: offline

Has there been any nationally or societally sanctioned form of discrimination that has not claimed either natural order or divine authority (there's a phrase for this that escapes me, momentarily, which I think the British used, in reference to their right to colonization and suppression of the native people), as the rationale for their offenses?

I think that comparing one form of discrimination to another is apt.

(I was referring to discrimination by race, in my post above, by the way, not specifically to the Nazis.)

< Message edited by MadameMarque -- 10/30/2007 12:46:26 PM >

(in reply to SmokingGun82)

Post #: 12

RE: Words - 10/30/2007 11:47:39 AM

RRafe

Posts: 2060
Joined: 8/29/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: meticulousgirl

amazing isn't it?

~meticulous~

I mean get real. Most women here want a service top to call "Master". Why call it submitting at all? It would save a lot of grief if women could just be brave enough to admit to liking bedroom kink. Nothing wrong with that-and no need to feel guilty. Instead, they have to romanticize thier insecure bullshit-and puff up. Then pitch a fit when a guy tries to get what HE wants from them.

It really does make for some terrible mismatches-but that's all the more I'm gonna say about it-for now. And why my profile is set to discourage it.

_____________________________

I seem to be some wierd combination of Ren and Stimpy

(in reply to meticulousgirl)

Post #: 13

RE: Words - 10/30/2007 11:52:34 AM

MadRabbit

Posts: 3460
Joined: 8/9/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: RRafe

quote:

ORIGINAL: meticulousgirl

amazing isn't it?

~meticulous~

I mean get real. Most women here want a service top to call "Master". Why call it submitting at all? It would save a lot of grief if women could just be brave enough to admit to liking bedroom kink. Nothing wrong with that-and no need to feel guilty. Instead, they have to romanticize thier insecure bullshit-and puff up. Then pitch a fit when a guy tries to get what HE wants from them.

We clearly must be dating some of the same women.

Dipping into my Kool Aid, Rrafe? Or just a shared experience?

< Message edited by MadRabbit -- 10/30/2007 11:53:31 AM >

_____________________________

Advice for New Dominants
The Unpolitically Correct Lifestyle Definitions

Obama is NOT the Messiah! He's just a VERY NAUGHTY BOY

(in reply to RRafe)

Post #: 14

RE: Words - 10/30/2007 11:56:55 AM

RRafe

Posts: 2060
Joined: 8/29/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MadRabbit

quote:

ORIGINAL: RRafe

quote:

ORIGINAL: meticulousgirl

amazing isn't it?

~meticulous~

I mean get real. Most women here want a service top to call "Master". Why call it submitting at all? It would save a lot of grief if women could just be brave enough to admit to liking bedroom kink. Nothing wrong with that-and no need to feel guilty. Instead, they have to romanticize thier insecure bullshit-and puff up. Then pitch a fit when a guy tries to get what HE wants from them.

We clearly must be dating some of the same women.

Dipping into my Kool Aid, Rrafe? Or just a shared experience?

The pool seems to be laced with something that causes a dissociation from reality. Probably because the men really do think with thier dicks. You get what you put up with.

_____________________________

I seem to be some wierd combination of Ren and Stimpy

(in reply to MadRabbit)

Post #: 15

RE: Words - 10/30/2007 12:02:54 PM

MadameMarque

Posts: 1128
Joined: 3/19/2005
Status: offline

I said,

quote:

What I am is just plain scared, for those who will suffer from the terrible misuse and misunderstanding I've seen, of the words "consensual," "nonconsensual," "real slavery," and "punishment."

[clipped]

There is, in fact, power in words.

SmokingGun82 said,

quote:

[clipped]
Words only have the power you give them. And if they actually scare you, you need some professional help. They're pixels on a screen, a screen you can turn off at any time... why would that scare you?"

If you don't have the sense to observe the power and importance and the effect on yours, and everyone else's life, of words,...
communication, miscommunication, understanding, misunderstanding, diplomacy, the political science of the use of words, their power to clarify or deceive, to persuade, to seduce, to incite, to bond or to alienate others, in all areas of life - then I don't know how to begin to explain it to you.

Above, when I said I was scared for people who will suffer, due to misunderstandings caused by misuse of certain words and miscommunication, in using them, I don't believe I need any therapy, for that. But how patronizing of you to suggest it.

And if you think that words are "just pixels on a screen," I would suggest that you get off the computer more often. Because that is a naive viewpoint.

< Message edited by MadameMarque -- 10/30/2007 12:07:23 PM >

(in reply to SmokingGun82)

Post #: 16

RE: Words - 10/30/2007 12:47:41 PM

stella41b

Posts: 4258
Joined: 10/16/2007
From: SW London (UK)
Status: offline

Words to me are just signals expressed in language - either written or spoken - which go towards making up the whole picture or complete message. Their value or individual meaning is really nothing more than an element or component of this whole picture or complete message, and is understood as such.

(in reply to Dnomyar)

Post #: 17

RE: Words - 10/30/2007 12:58:24 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

The Rabbit beat Me to the punch. I can not for the life of Me understand why so many people get their head twisted over the word "true". A second runner up on the trigger scale being the word "real". It seems that the minute someone uses one of these in a post, the content of the topic goes off into the netherworld, and suddenly, it's a debate about how "true" someone's experiences are when compared with someone else's. I've often thought, just for fun, I'd start a post entitled, "That nasty four letter word" and have the opportunity for everyone to get their negative notions about the word "true" and get it over with. I gave up the idea, knowing it would just come back a week later.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to stella41b)

Post #: 18

RE: Words - 10/30/2007 1:05:45 PM

wisteriaV

Posts: 438
Joined: 3/17/2005
Status: offline

I think for some of us that life the life choice outside of the bedroom as M/s or D/s ect get annoyed with people that cant be real. I dont care what your kink is as long as the other person can give consent. I dont care if your married, shacked up or otherwise...hell just be real about it. For example, hey Im married, the relationship sucks, she is aware or not aware of the situation ect....whats wrong with a little honesty. Now as far as " just words" go if that were the case then people wouldnt get their underwear in a knot when someone speaks their mind or confront someone.

_____________________________

Every story has two sides , much like a coin and neither one is totally perfect.
If it doesn't float your boat, then don't get in the water~!

(in reply to stella41b)

Post #: 19

RE: Words - 10/30/2007 1:09:06 PM

SmokingGun82

Posts: 575
Joined: 6/19/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MadameMarque
If you don't have the sense to observe the power and importance and the effect on yours, and everyone else's life, of words,...
communication, miscommunication, understanding, misunderstanding, diplomacy, the political science of the use of words, their power to clarify or deceive, to persuade, to seduce, to incite, to bond or to alienate others, in all areas of life - then I don't know how to begin to explain it to you.

Then we're arguing semantics. I don't find words, themselves, offensive or "scary." There are countless examples that would be inappropriate for this board, but let's just say any supposedly "derogatory" term for body parts are just letters and words... inflection and intent is what you mean. You don't like the intent some people have with their words, I get that... but how the word "consensual" fucks with you I'll never get.

quote:

ORIGINAL: MadameMarque
Above, when I said I was scared for people who will suffer, due to misunderstandings caused by misuse of certain words and miscommunication, in using them, I don't believe I need any therapy, for that. But how patronizing of you to suggest it.

You found it patronizing? Good. That's how it was meant. If I wanted you to think I respected your opinion, you would.

quote:

ORIGINAL: MadameMarque
And if you think that words are "just pixels on a screen," I would suggest that you get off the computer more often. Because that is a naive viewpoint.

That would be your opinion. How you reached it is probably a fascinating display of shitty logic. You're scared because someone you've never met is using a word you don't like. Tell me how that's anything more than pathetic.

_____________________________

It frightens me, the awful truth of how sweet life can be.
- Bob Dylan

Proper capitalization is the difference between "I had to help my Uncle Jack off a horse" and "I had to help my uncle jack off a horse."

(in reply to MadameMarque)

Post #: 20

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