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Aimtoplease101 -> RE: Submissives who are challenged by submission vs. ambivalent about it (11/18/2007 12:03:02 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: AAkasha
could never really bring himself to do unless he was under the direction of a woman he wanted to submit to. He can't just do them on his own. He has to do them for a woman, and she has to enjoy it, and sometimes he has to be motivated beyond that to find it in him to submit to the act.
quote:
It seems to me that this category encompasses a huge portion of the activity that we often see in D/s or SM play activity. I, for example, would not get any charge out of spanking myself, but find it very erotic when a Domme so disciplines me. The same applies with a lot of service-oriented activity. I could perform the exact same act outside of a D/s context, but it doesn't carry the same emotional and psychological content as when done as an act of submission and surrender to a Domme's command.
I suppose the difference is the "could" factor here-- the difference between being physically capable of doing something on your own, but simply not driven or interested in doing so, versus actually being unable to perform the act unless ordered. But I think that's a pretty rare category. It seems to me this mostly would consist of circumstances in which the sub is having trouble owning up to his submissive nature, and wants the "excuse" of claiming that he had no choice-- the Domme "forced" him to do it. It seems to ignore the fact that we really engage in consensual power exchanges.
Part of the thrill in submitting to things that you normally wouldn't want to do (as opposed to being incapable of doing) is the intrigue of self-discovery, allowing a Domme to guide you in the exploration of the depths of your submission (or, as it's sometimes called, playing "How Low Can You Go?"). This is limit testing-- how far will you submit before identifying that line that you won't cross, that act that you simply will not commit, regardless of who is telling you to do it? It can be heady stuff, in the right circumstances and with the right participants.
Regards, ATP
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