RE: Users, Abusers, and Losers

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RE: Users, Abusers, and Losers - 11/3/2007 11:18:02 AM

wintersbreath

Posts: 23
Status: offline

While yes, there are users, abusers, and losers in every walk of life; you must also remember that what you see in a person, may well not be what others will see.

(in reply to IanS)

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Post #: 21

RE: Users, Abusers, and Losers - 11/3/2007 11:27:54 AM

BloodLuna

Posts: 403
Joined: 10/28/2007
Status: offline

Yes there are a lot of users and abusers out there. I was held against my will and raped and brutalized for 3 months by a so called "dom". Someday when I have the courage I'll post something about what happened to me.

But For every abuser is someone desperate who subconsciously or consciously sets themselves up for the abuse. A newbie submissive friend of mine was staying with us for a while to help me with my pregnancy (she got evicted and traded nursing and housekeeping for room and board) She went nuts trying to find a "Master" online. I tried very hard to explain to her that "submissive frenzy" is normal and to slow down and stop doing dangerous things (such as giving my address to a dom she talked to for an hour on collarme for example so he could pick her up for a hotel date!) (This just happened THIS WEEK) Last weekend she created a secret (from me) profile here on Friday, secretly met a "Dom" in NJ, told me her son was badly injured in an accident and that she had to get on a bus to go home. I offered to buy her laptop from her for a bus ticket but that I couldn't give her the money until Monday. (It turned out to be a lie - her son is fine), She packed her bag and put it in the car. On Saturday told me she was going on a walk. She never came back. Turns out she decided to WALK to NJ to be with this "dom." I called her family and warned them and can do nothing but hope she is ok.

There is a difference between a survivor and a vitim. Victims subconsciously and sometimes consciously seek to be abused again. So long as there are victims, there will be abusers waiting to take advantage of them.

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"Old goths never die, they just need less makeup"

(in reply to bipolarber)

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Post #: 22

RE: Users, Abusers, and Losers - 11/3/2007 12:02:40 PM

insistentone

Posts: 21
Joined: 7/17/2007
Status: offline

Very true; there are many victims, they can not be saved until they are ready to change, and BDSM is a very good market place for victims and abusers to find each other, and get what they want and/or need.

< Message edited by insistentone -- 11/3/2007 12:03:15 PM >

(in reply to BloodLuna)

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Post #: 23

RE: Users, Abusers, and Losers - 11/3/2007 12:13:15 PM

MuscleCuteClever

Posts: 61
Joined: 9/12/2007
Status: offline

In BDSM there are traits that are synonymous with interpersonal relationships.

So if someone being an asshole turns you on then how do you tell the difference? Noobs will be prey for this kind of thing seeing as its all new to them and they are discovering themselves so it will be harder I think, for them to distinguish differences between personality and sexuality knowing what I say on the 1st line.

Unfortunately not everyone is wise, intelligent or experienced the average IQ is 100, so sadly there will be those vulnerable to this no matter how stupid some people think others might be. I think the best way around it is to fuck the internet all together and stop letting it fuck the fetish scene a new fuckhole and make some other new sites with strict rules.

< Message edited by MuscleCuteClever -- 11/3/2007 12:16:29 PM >

(in reply to insistentone)

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Post #: 24

RE: Users, Abusers, and Losers - 11/3/2007 12:23:48 PM

Raechard

Posts: 3513
Joined: 3/10/2007
From: S.E. London U.K.
Status: offline

Ahh the three sers.

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えへまにんへえや
Nobody wants to listen to the same song over and over again!

(in reply to MuscleCuteClever)

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RE: Users, Abusers, and Losers - 11/3/2007 12:33:46 PM

batshalom

Posts: 1990
Joined: 9/17/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MuscleCuteClever

I think the best way around it is to fuck the internet all together and stop letting it fuck the fetish scene a new fuckhole and make some other new sites with strict rules.

Ah yes. Most cute and clever.

(in reply to MuscleCuteClever)

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Post #: 26

RE: Users, Abusers, and Losers - 11/3/2007 6:03:59 PM

Celeste43

Posts: 3066
Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

So really the solution is for adult women who wish to get involved in an alternative relationship dynamic need to take responsibility and make better judgements and choices for themselves rather than forming false expectations based on fantasy.

And adult men, since they frequently pop up complaining everybody is a fake also.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

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Post #: 27

RE: Users, Abusers, and Losers - 11/3/2007 6:16:24 PM

kitttty

Posts: 494
Joined: 10/10/2007
Status: offline

quote:

I always find it strange that posts like the OP suggesting that newbie subs are careful tend to come from male Doms. Is this a touch of White Knight Syndrome in action?

shhh. Don't complain. It's so cute!

OP, please elaborate on how you wish to keep your precious sub protected from all the predatory doms out there. Tell me how you would shelter her and guide her to recover from past abuse. Tell me because it is sexy.

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)

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Post #: 28