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RE: Submission are we born this way?? - 11/5/2007 4:03:31 AM   
MRandme


Posts: 661
Joined: 9/24/2007
Status: offline
When i was very young i was not shy at all. i was the bubbly little girl, ,with a smile for everyone and everyone's friend, the one who used to get in trouble for chasing the boys at school. No, that doesn't sound submissive, but i just wanted them to notice me. *grin*

Transition a few years to my father's custody of me -- the less said about that the better, but one of the problems was that we moved often. i went to 10 different elementary schools, some of them more than once. i became withdrawn and shy, never wanted to take the time to get to know people when i knew i'd end up leaving soon anyway.

i am forty now. i am still quiet and tend to not talk around people i don't know well, and a negative reaction can turn me into the quiet girl again. Once i do know them, i can open up and show my true personality. i am still that bubbly little girl, but not everyone gets to see it.


g


_____________________________

And thus i conclude with a wish you go well,
Sweet be your dreams, may your happiness swell,
I'll leave you here, for my journey begins
i've gone to be with Him again...

(in reply to mya75)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Submission are we born this way?? - 11/5/2007 5:46:11 AM   
brattysarahjane


Posts: 36
Joined: 6/13/2007
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i was and am usually very shy in the beginning but once i warm up to a person, watch out.  i can talk your ear off.  but then again, i am submissive with a small switch side.  very small though.

bratty sarah jane

(in reply to MRandme)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Submission are we born this way?? - 11/5/2007 6:12:32 AM   
deziray


Posts: 18
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mya75

Once again I have been reading so I will play a bit with my next question for *subs & slaves*......I personally believe there is a direct correlation with being a shy person by nature and becoming a submissive..I know not all will agree with this but I'd like to hear your thoughts....As a child I was overly shy almost extreme and it wasnt until I became an adult and entered into this lifestyle that I knew where to target my shyness at that point I became *shy/submissive to those I felt were superior to me and assertive to those I deemed not so worthy*  My question is if you are a sub ....would you look back and say you were a shy child? **Thanks in advance for any responses**

Hello mya75
 
I am a very private and quiet person; some may even say that it is shyness that brings out this aspect within me. I do not believe, however, that this has anything to do with my nature. I have known submissives and slaves who are extremely outgoing, aggressive, extroverted, and with so much confidence in themselves that it just shines from within. And I have known submissives and slaves who were so shy that they could not find it in themselves to say hello to another.
 
I have thought that shyness stems more from an internal need to keep oneself private and protected. I don't think that it is natural to a submissive or slave though.
 
desiree

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It is only in the silence of calm that the beat of the heart can be heard

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RE: Submission are we born this way?? - 11/5/2007 11:48:08 AM   
Michaelsangel


Posts: 49
Joined: 10/15/2007
From: Portland Oregon
Status: offline
Actually yes, I was extremely shy as a child. I was also a bookworm who loved learning and was an A+ student. In fact, I was so shy that if I had to deliver a speech in front of my class, I would get violently ill.

Michaelsangel

(in reply to mya75)
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RE: Submission are we born this way?? - 11/5/2007 11:58:46 AM   
SoHott


Posts: 80
Joined: 11/4/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mya75

Once again I have been reading so I will play a bit with my next question for *subs & slaves*......I personally believe there is a direct correlation with being a shy person by nature and becoming a submissive..I know not all will agree with this but I'd like to hear your thoughts....As a child I was overly shy almost extreme and it wasnt until I became an adult and entered into this lifestyle that I knew where to target my shyness at that point I became *shy/submissive to those I felt were superior to me and assertive to those I deemed not so worthy*  My question is if you are a sub ....would you look back and say you were a shy child? **Thanks in advance for any responses**


This girl wasn't a bookworm, or shy... class clown.

Now she is a bookworm and shy...

Submissive isn't a fully understood term.

She serves and secretly wishes and hopes (without ever saying) that someday her service will fulfill her fantasies.

This girl is a slave to her mistress/masters pleasure.

_____________________________

If everything in life was free
We'd float in our own reverie
The things that you can't seem to see
seal the gap between you and me

(in reply to mya75)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Submission are we born this way?? - 11/5/2007 4:07:55 PM   
Tigrita


Posts: 484
Joined: 8/16/2007
From: California
Status: offline
FR...

I was very shy as a kid, but then became very assertive in college and discovered BDSM shortly after that.  Fear of returning to my shy, insecure self has held me back a little in really opening up to submission, affraid of vulnerability, but I'm working past that.  I think a lot of my assertiveness has been a filter to find someone strong enough to dominate me.  I try to top when possible, and those I'm not able to are the men I become interested in.

~ J

_____________________________

~ Tigrita

There is no right path, only the path you take.

Success is making life happen, versus just letting life happen to you.

"Many of the things I enjoy, I enjoy because I don't enjoy them." - Charlotte

(in reply to mya75)
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RE: Submission are we born this way?? - 11/5/2007 6:47:19 PM   
fit2pleaseu


Posts: 77
Joined: 10/26/2007
Status: offline
With regards to shyness and submission..im sure there are those out there who are shy and simply hide themselves away from many social places which in a way would hide them from "submission"
my personal experience is that i have always been shy from as far back i can remember but especially when it comes to the opposite sex...there is also a small esteem issue as well which may play an equal or larger part in my case.
saying that i have always been attracted if not a little intimidated.."smiles" towards strong women who have a dominant nature.
So maybe i was born to be subservant because of these factors?..i dont really know but am happy being who i am.
Perhaps this will help or answer some of your questions!

(in reply to Tigrita)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Submission are we born this way?? - 11/5/2007 7:31:44 PM   
Maya2001


Posts: 1656
Joined: 8/22/2007
From: Woodstock ONT,CANADA
Status: offline
Submissiveness and shyness can be genetic traits.  Using pedigrees of greyhounds that go back to the late 1700's  as well as historical documents  about the dogs in certain breed lines there a severe phobic shyness(referred to as spooks) occuring in some dogs, that can be traced back to two well known dams that were also recorded as spooks.,   some are capable though very difficult to handle as racers, with some even making it into the greyhound hall of fame.   I tend to enjoy having a bit of challenge in my life and as such ended adopting 2 spooks, the first was an alpha dominent female, though very fearful of people, she was extremely confident around other dogs and had strong leadership skills which gave her the capacity to race and strong desire to compete against other dogs , the second is an omega , even around puppies she is very submissive, and had to eventually be seperated from her litter as she would get picked on due to her extreme submissiveness  by other dogs, she has the strong prey drive but her shyness and submissiveness will override the desire to chase so she was total unable to race  she would become so overwhelmed that she would turn around and try to run back into the starting box to hide, her mother , her grandsire on sire side who is also her greatgrandsire on her dam side were spooks are well but her great/grandsire though a spook was dominate and was very well famed as a racer, most of her litter had varying degrees of milder shyness with one dominant  but hers was extreme.

Sometimes shyness/submissive can occur as a result of trauma, but in the greyhound models  the litters are kept and raised together right about to about 16 months old  so different personalities   will emerges despite being treated and handled, fed  all the same which helps to prove that genetics is involved.     The ones with the phobic shyness  starts off fairly normal as puppies but it is when the hormones kick in during puberty that drastic changes in personality start to occur and they start developing vey strong fear reactions, yet the ones with  normal  shyness  it will be apparent from a very young age.  One hall of fame sires was retired early from stud duties because a high percentage  of his offspring were becoming spooks, my first one was his grandaughter.  I got lot of my info a greyhound pedigree historian who was also a topnotch trainer as well as breeder  in the US and UK, having had his own spooks he himself interested in whether there was a genetic factor so had spents some years tracing pedigrees before I had spoken to him, though my original reason for getting hold of him was my own confusion as to understand how strong dominance could exist in a dog that was extremely shy


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Lead me not into temptation - I can find the way myself

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Profile   Post #: 28
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