RE: Why do sub/slaves not want to be called what they have declared they are? (Full Version)

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teapaw -> RE: Why do sub/slaves not want to be called what they have declared they are? (8/23/2005 5:52:58 AM)

I agree! [:)]
Where do we go to ask. LOL
pamela
quote:

ORIGINAL: caitlyn

collarme needs more profile catagories





EmeraldSlave2 -> RE: Why do sub/slaves not want to be called what they have declared they are? (8/23/2005 6:20:14 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: sirrand
ES2 I am I wrong or do you just not like me? I like you and your feisty comments. Bob we may have taken this as far as we can I don't know maybe not enough of our community has spoken.

Sir Rand

[
I don't know you so I really don't have much feelings either way. Your posts however lack logical cohesion, have a distinct air of condescension and a common flavor of Tops Disease.




perverseangelic -> RE: Why do sub/slaves not want to be called what they have declared they are? (8/23/2005 8:43:22 AM)

I admit, it bothes me that the OP only actually took into account what a top said, even when we all said the same thing.




sultryvoice -> RE: Why do sub/slaves not want to be called what they have declared they are? (8/23/2005 6:12:14 PM)

This thread has taken on a life of its own....Has the point been made yet? I feel it has..but, that's only my opinion..

Respectfully,
sultry




tedibare -> RE: Why do sub/slaves not want to be called what they have declared they are? (8/24/2005 10:50:02 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Isolde

Simple answer: I'm a submissive, not your submissive. I only respond to that title when it's used by my dominant. Any other dominant addressing me as such appears presumptuous and disrespectful, as if they're assuming they can demand submission from me when I haven't given it. Any dominant other than my own should refer to me as a person, not a submissive, and therefore use my name.


here here, i feel the same way... being submissive has nothing to do with everyone in the world, it has to do with one... sorry if that makes me "not a TRUE submissive" but if someone on the street or gods forbid, at work, called me slave, sub or slut id be royally ticked off... i have a name and untill i give one that power over me, i expect it to be used...

tedi




tedibare -> RE: Why do sub/slaves not want to be called what they have declared they are? (8/24/2005 11:17:12 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: sirrand
As I said further down I thought maybe a category called ‘I'm not till I am’ would not get your vote. I maybe old fashioned, but when a Dom/Master ask a girl 'Are you a submissive or a slave' and the girl's answered in the affirmative that was a declaration of intent. It also was a silent agreement between them both that they were interested in each other. In the mating dance of Dom/Master sub/slave this was the first step.


oh im sorry, next time a Dominant asks me if im submissive or slave ill say no...
the lack of interest does not mean im not submissive... last i checked a polite question deserves a polite answer without needing to lie

quote:

“This is the crux of my argument;
The Dom/Masters, that I have talked to, think it is disrespectful for a declared sub/slave not to recognize their rank. It seems a little petty either way to me. My position is I write it down at the top so the recipient understands I have read at least that much of their profile. Since they also object to my sending an introduction letter, and carp about me not reading their profile when they didn't even write much of anything. I feel I am acknowledging their wishes.”


i DO believe there is a Gorean forum if THATS what your looking for... being on this site does not mean that one is looking for anything... recognizing that im submissive doesnt mean im inferior, therefore my "rank" has no bearing in the conversation

quote:

So you don’t think that if I were to address you as sub or slave that I as a Master was not acknowledging your desire to be either. And that I was also declaring my interest in helping you attain that desire that you needed to help you be whole or you wouldn’t be declaring yourself on collarme.

I feel it is not a presumption on my part but common courtesy and an acknowledgement of your deep need. Am I wrong?


declaring? ummm i dont know about anyone else but i joined this place because i saw a community wherein i could converse about a subject that i have a great interest in... irregardless of that... even if someone IS looking for something, isnt common courtesy refering to them by the name they have given until you have reached a point where the relationship has become more personal?

tedi




tedibare -> RE: Why do sub/slaves not want to be called what they have declared they are? (8/24/2005 11:20:35 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Synocense

When I read the replies to this post, I got the sense we were starting some sort of equal rights movement all over again. "I am a human being first and foremost...." "I am submissive, but not YOUR submissive, sodontEVENstartbossingmearound!" Ok, Ok, we get the picture. I don't feel my name and/or identity is being replaced when someone calls me "sub" or "slave" or "girl" - but that is because I can identify with each of those roles at some point, on some level. For those of you who do not define yourself as "sub" or "slave" have a legitimate beef with being called such. Those who do, good grief, lighten up, please. It's hard for me to believe someone would use these terms as an intentional personal attack. I can think of better words. *s* I don't liken it in any way with someone I am not married to calling me "wife" - to me it is something assiciated and particular with our chosen lifestyle.

: ) Syn "A rose by any other name...."


lol ok how bout this... just because i AM a mother, and my son calls me mom, does NOT mean anyone else can address me as such... i see no problem with this... it IS common(not so common) courtesy to address someone by name

tedi




tedibare -> RE: Why do sub/slaves not want to be called what they have declared they are? (8/24/2005 11:49:09 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: sirrand
It just seemed odd to me that once stepping into ‘the life’. that one would want to revel in every aspect of it from going nude all the time to being called sub or slave. I suppose I misjudged the level of commitment of quite a few of the purported sub/slaves.


purported?? im so sorry that my having to work and raise a child precludes me from being "committed" sorry i cant do this 24/7 and wander around barefoot and naked, kneeling at the feet of every male in my view... passing judgements on those who differ from your POV is rather ummm closed minded and doesnt much help any of us... we get enough prejudgements from people OUTSIDE the lifestyle

tedi[:@]





tedibare -> RE: Why do sub/slaves not want to be called what they have declared they are? (8/24/2005 11:52:42 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: ElektraUkM
You know, nella I am not very well versed on Aspergers syndrome but if there is a way I could help to change that for you, I would be willing to try. Some good work is being done by well renowned hypnotists on DNA. Myself I work with the vibratory rate of the cells. Both have some relief for your particular syndrome.


This is a whole other topic, but I'd be interested to see any literature/references you might have to back up this statement.

as would i, since i have read just about everything i can find on the subject

tedi




tedibare -> RE: Why do sub/slaves not want to be called what they have declared they are? (8/25/2005 12:21:56 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: EmeraldSlave2
To me the really TELLING statement is the one you made which is:

"I suppose I misjudged the level of commitment of quite a few of the purported sub/slaves."

You USE the word "misjudged" which means you felt you DID INDEED previously judge something, by whatever definition YOU consider judging, and then inexplicable say later that you very much NEVER judge anything as it's not your place.


i am less worried about the self use of "misjudged" as the use of the word purported...

purported (from dictionary.com) To have or present the often false appearance of being or intending; profess: selfish behavior that purports to be altruistic.

which indicates that if we dont like to be called sub/slave then we are only playing at being such... that we are lying or presenting false information...

tedi




sirrand -> RE: Why do sub/slaves not want to be called what they have declared they are? (8/26/2005 9:11:31 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: tedibare


quote:

ORIGINAL: Isolde

Simple answer: I'm a submissive, not your submissive. I only respond to that title when it's used by my dominant. Any other dominant addressing me as such appears presumptuous and disrespectful, as if they're assuming they can demand submission from me when I haven't given it. Any dominant other than my own should refer to me as a person, not a submissive, and therefore use my name.


here here, i feel the same way... being submissive has nothing to do with everyone in the world, it has to do with one... sorry if that makes me "not a TRUE submissive" but if someone on the street or gods forbid, at work, called me slave, sub or slut id be royally ticked off... i have a name and untill i give one that power over me, i expect it to be used...

tedi



I totally agree too and yes I believe in most circumstances that using your name is the appropriate response.

Sometimes the use of miss and/or mrs is also appropriate. If I know you well I might also say woman or girl. I has many meaning to me but sometimes it means think what your saying.

SR




sirrand -> RE: Why do sub/slaves not want to be called what they have declared they are? (8/26/2005 9:24:55 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: tedibare


quote:

ORIGINAL: ElektraUkM
You know, nella I am not very well versed on Aspergers syndrome but if there is a way I could help to change that for you, I would be willing to try. Some good work is being done by well renowned hypnotists on DNA. Myself I work with the vibratory rate of the cells. Both have some relief for your particular syndrome.


This is a whole other topic, but I'd be interested to see any literature/references you might have to back up this statement.


as would i, since i have read just about everything i can find on the subject

tedi
quote:

I has many meaning to me but sometimes it means think what your saying.


[I has many meaning to me but sometimes it means think what your saying.} Should have said “It has many meanings to me, but sometimes it means 'think what you are saying'. (Typo)

On yahoo there a few threads that have discussed the use of hypno DNA . As well as places you have to be a paid up member. As for the authority for my method I believe "Rhythms of Vision" by Lawrence Blair may be a good read. If you would like to discuss this more email me here on collarme.

Sir Rand




sirrand -> RE: Why do sub/slaves not want to be called what they have declared they are? (8/26/2005 9:30:49 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: tedibare


quote:

ORIGINAL: ElektraUkM
You know, nella I am not very well versed on Aspergers syndrome but if there is a way I could help to change that for you, I would be willing to try. Some good work is being done by well renowned hypnotists on DNA. Myself I work with the vibratory rate of the cells. Both have some relief for your particular syndrome.


This is a whole other topic, but I'd be interested to see any literature/references you might have to back up this statement.


as would i, since i have read just about everything i can find on the subject

tedi


On yahoo there a few threads that have discussed the use of hypno DNA . As well as places you have to be a paid up member. As for the authority for my method I believe "Rhythms of Vision" by Larwence Blair may be a good read.




angelwingrazor -> RE: Why do sub/slaves not want to be called what they have declared they are? (9/22/2006 2:02:21 AM)

Mainly what it is, while i'm a slave, i don't want to be adressed as "Slave" when i don't know you. Not that it offends me, it just irks me for some reason. It's kind of like the people who email me and -demand- my submission immediately.




eyesopened -> RE: Why do sub/slaves not want to be called what they have declared they are? (9/22/2006 3:02:40 AM)

i would prefer to be called by my name in real life until such time as i become someone's sub or slave however, i am never offended by being called "sub" in initial emails, etc.  Because i have a very unusual name and i live in a pretty small town, i prefer not to give out my real name on sites like this or during initial contacts.  So, what else would someone i'm talking with call me?  i guess some subs have so many suitors that they can nit-pick but i've never had that problem.  i'm not going to let little things bother me.  It's the content of the contact i look for.




zumala -> RE: Why do sub/slaves not want to be called what they have declared they are? (9/24/2006 10:34:09 AM)

It's simply a social thing.  We humans are social beings and we've developed something called 'manners' in order to keep things on an even keel (i.e. not continually giving offense).  Here, just like anywhere else, it's best to call someone by their name.  If you enter into a relationship with them, then call them whatever you two agree on between yourselves.   It's pretty simple.
 
If someone walked up to me on the street and said 'Hi, Babe' or 'Hello, slut', they'd probably walk away with a fat lip.  I don't expect anyone here to treat me that way either.  Don't presume ANYTHING, ever.  It will only get you into trouble.
 
zuma
 
 




MagiksSlave -> RE: Why do sub/slaves not want to be called what they have declared they are? (9/24/2006 10:39:42 AM)

simple do you want to be called man???? slave is not my name my Master calls me slave if it pleases him but then he is Master and may call me what it pleases him to call me. I dont owe my submition to anyone but him and it is rather rude of anyone to be calling me any sort of name that isnt my given name or nick name on the sight I find it rude and will not respond to it.

Magik's slave




liljoy -> RE: Why do sub/slaves not want to be called what they have declared they are? (9/24/2006 5:17:23 PM)

~fast reply~
look at his profile he requires his submissive/ slave to be a mind reader and to know without being told what he likes.
lil_joy




mstrjx -> RE: Why do sub/slaves not want to be called what they have declared they are? (9/24/2006 5:33:54 PM)

Look at the dates.  A 13-month-old thread has been opened.




liljoy -> RE: Why do sub/slaves not want to be called what they have declared they are? (9/24/2006 5:36:03 PM)

lol i hadn't noticed. thanks for pointing that out to me




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