Does older mean wiser?

Does older mean wiser? (Full Version)

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sweetcreeangel -> Does older mean wiser? (11/16/2007 11:46:55 PM)
I was wondering for the Older Doms out there...........does older make You wiser or are You still learning different aspects of the lifestyle?Does life-experince over ride a newbie or some one who has been in say 5+ years verses say 16+? basically what i am trying to say with-out meaning disrepect of any kind just because You as a Dom who has years of experince worth more then a Dom that has only say -4 years of experince? Thank-You for taking the time to read my post and answering it i look forward to reading any one's answers

Lumus -> RE: Does older mean wiser? (11/16/2007 11:54:27 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sweetcreeangel I was wondering for the Older Doms out there...........does older make You wiser or are You still learning different aspects of the lifestyle?Does life-experince over ride a newbie or some one who has been in say 5+ years verses say 16+? basically what i am trying to say with-out meaning disrepect of any kind just because You as a Dom who has years of experince worth more then a Dom that has only say -4 years of experince? Thank-You for taking the time to read my post and answering it i look forward to reading any one's answers In or out of the kink arena, experience does not automatically equal wisdom. You can know more and still make the wrong choice. Hell, I have. Besides, everyone has their preferences - some want a new person to mold right; some want a person with experience to focus on specifics. Don't fret over your level of expereince...instead, work towards finding a Dom who suits your needs, and whose needs you fit as well.

sweetcreeangel -> RE: Does older mean wiser? (11/17/2007 12:02:22 AM)
smiles softly thank You Lumus for taking the time to read and reply to my post

Archer -> RE: Does older mean wiser? (11/17/2007 1:11:45 AM)
As a freind of mine loves to say. "20 years can make you a wise Master or an Old Jackass." Time alone, only means the opportunities for you to learn have been there, not that you have taken them. How a person has used their time can male all the difference in the world. ALL OTHER THINGS BEING EQUAL more years on the planet will generally mean one has gained more knowledge and experience and will have more wisdom. But then to be perfectly fair the only way for "all other things to be equal" would be to compare yourself 5 years ago with you now, and then project you 10 years from now. Are you wiser today than 5 years ago? will you likely be even wiser 10 years from now?

lateralist1 -> RE: Does older mean wiser? (11/17/2007 2:40:48 AM)
I agree totally with your friend Archer. What I have learned about other people and myself while I have been in the lifestyle has far outweighed anything that I learned previously. Basically because I have talked in depth with more people. The more people one talks to the more ones perception of the world changes. Like a lot of people I think I have realised that I have always been a Domme I just didn't know it. All anyone has to be is themselves and hopefully find the right person or people to compliment who you are. I was so concerned that I had left it too late but I have realised that it is never too late. Some people do admire those of us at any age that can learn and grow whilst using what we know to find our own and other's deep satisfaction.

Maya2001 -> RE: Does older mean wiser? (11/17/2007 6:19:10 AM)
Age/experience does not equal wisdom. Wisdom comes often from learning from your own and others mistakes or learning to adapt to change. Proof that age does not necessarily make a person wiser is when you see a 50+ year old still get behind the wheel when they have been drinking heavily, there are plently of 20 year olds that are wiser in that area. [;)] The same applies to any other area of life

IrishMist -> RE: Does older mean wiser? (11/17/2007 6:41:51 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Archer As a freind of mine loves to say. "20 years can make you a wise Master or an Old Jackass." Time alone, only means the opportunities for you to learn have been there, not that you have taken them. How a person has used their time can male all the difference in the world. ALL OTHER THINGS BEING EQUAL more years on the planet will generally mean one has gained more knowledge and experience and will have more wisdom. But then to be perfectly fair the only way for "all other things to be equal" would be to compare yourself 5 years ago with you now, and then project you 10 years from now. Are you wiser today than 5 years ago? will you likely be even wiser 10 years from now? Archer summed it up pretty well.

LadyHugs -> RE: Does older mean wiser? (11/17/2007 7:40:16 AM)
Dear sweetcreeangel, Ladies and Gentlemen; Based on my personal observations and experiences; in the area I am in--many older adults come in like a newly minted coin and are just as new as a younger person. What is a common response to older individuals, who might be mature in many ways are assumed to have seasoned Dominant skills. I can understand how difficult it may be to come in late in life into a face paced BDSM society and most mature adults will draw on their life's lessons as to respond in a way that gives the air of confidence and control, as to be attractive to submissive and or slave types. I have seen several cases where seasoned Dominants and Switches have made more than one immature move right after another. These people are my age or older but, to my mind's eyes--I see them highly immature, reckless, without honor and out to make BDSM their personal purse while holding a position as to control the finances. So, to me the age of an adult does not mean that they are wiser--unless the 'wisdom' comes from pulling off con-games one right after another. I have seen several cases of young individuals with an extremely 'old soul/spirit' wisdom and act beyond their years in wise choices, mature attitude and behavior; practicing M/s, D/s and or BDSM in a wise and mature manner. I would personally prefer that individuals judge individuals as a total package and then the last forms of sorting be on personal preferences. For example, I prefer older men --as they are a tad bit slower in escaping bondage and running away, especially when I pull out the axe or knives and especially the rat and mice traps. [Grins] It compensates having to run in stillettos. [Smiles with a bit of humor] It really boils down on making choices that are best for you (in a general sense) and according to what you (in general) prefer. If I was in a slave's position, I would like to judge on overall qualities--especially their 'spirit of intent' as well as their ability, their attitude that nobody is perfect and nobody stops learning until they die, that everybody has something to offer and how much the other is willing to invest in you and the relationship. Just some thoughts. Respectfully submitted with a bit of wit, Lady Hugs

juliaoceania -> RE: Does older mean wiser? (11/17/2007 7:48:32 AM)
There is a younger dominant on this board whom I have read his postings and his profile, he seems pretty wise to me, and whatever young lady ends up wearing his collar is going to be very lucky if he is as bright, thoughtful, and discerning as he seems to be....

Sexynmentalinkc -> RE: Does older mean wiser? (11/17/2007 8:24:11 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sweetcreeangel I was wondering for the Older Doms out there...........does older make You wiser or are You still learning different aspects of the lifestyle? Does life-experince over ride a newbie or some one who has been in say 5+ years verses say 16+? basically what i am trying to say with-out meaning disrepect of any kind just because You as a Dom who has years of experince worth more then a Dom that has only say -4 years of experince? Entirely dependent upon the person. The time spent doesn't automatically go hand-in-hand with increased wisdom. I've been told that I "get" D/s, etc. more than Doms that have stated experience in years twice what I've accrued. I'm sure that there are some that have 4x's the experience and wisdom as I to go along with their years in the lifestyle. It all varies and lay with application a Dom puts into gaining wisdom. If you go 24/7 for 4 years, does that give you more wisdom than a 'weekend warrior' would have in 10? .....15? There's simply no way to equate time-spent to wisdom gained. tips his hat - Mr. S

MrSpectacular -> RE: Does older mean wiser? (11/17/2007 8:57:12 AM)
Yes - but it depends - Inevitably the older you get the more you have experienced. It does not necessarily make you wiser or more knowledgeable than someone younger.

IrishMist -> RE: Does older mean wiser? (11/17/2007 8:58:55 AM)
quote: Inevitably the older you get the more you have experienced Not true.

Honsoku -> RE: Does older mean wiser? (11/17/2007 9:11:15 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sweetcreeangel I was wondering for the Older Doms out there...........does older make You wiser or are You still learning different aspects of the lifestyle?Does life-experince over ride a newbie or some one who has been in say 5+ years verses say 16+? basically what i am trying to say with-out meaning disrepect of any kind just because You as a Dom who has years of experince worth more then a Dom that has only say -4 years of experince? Thank-You for taking the time to read my post and answering it i look forward to reading any one's answers Age does not equal wisdom. There are plenty of fools, old and young. Age only brings the chance for experiences. What those experiences are and what is learned from them is up to the individual. If someone learns extensively they can become wise at a very young age. If they only learn a little bit or nothing at all, they can remain fools until they are long past decrepit. There are definitely some experiences which can give a person a much better foundation and accelerate their pace of learning the craft of domination (how's that for pretentious sounding?), if they know to draw upon it. These experiences can't be qualified into X number of years however. Gaining understanding is a very individual process, which is why "years of experience" is at best an indicator and not a determinator of wisdom and skill. So yes, life experience can give someone a boost, but whether or not it will (and by how much) is determinant upon the individual and the experiences he or she has had. People are not wine; they don't always start tasting vile and they don't always get better with age. Honsoku

MadRabbit -> RE: Does older mean wiser? (11/17/2007 9:14:39 AM)
As someone who is a young buck, I have to pragmatically accept the fact that time plays a part in the growth of knowledge and experience. Like reading books, for example. I roughly get through one book a month and with the end of each book, I have new knowledge I can take and apply to my life in a infinite variety of possible ways. In five years from now, I will have read 60 books that I haven't read now and will hopefully know a lot more than what I do now. At the end of the day, I simply just can't compete with some of my older friends who have a couple of decades on me. They simply have had more time to read, learn and experience more! I am usually the one doing the listening in our conversations. However, folk wisdom such as the older you get, the more you have experienced or the more you have learned don't ring true to me since logically, time only provides the oppurtunity to learn and experience more. A lot of people unfortanely don't make good use of their time. Read some posts by Bobgkin for references and examples. I also find people who put me down for not being as old as they are to be rather amusing. As if somehow there was something I can do right now to accelerate the passage of time or should somehow feel bad because my birthdate wasn't a decade earlier....

juliaoceania -> RE: Does older mean wiser? (11/17/2007 10:16:46 AM)
Actually MadRabbit, you were the young dom I mentioned in my first post on this thread... there are many dominants much older than you that I have read and communicated with that had far less wisdom..... Edited to add, age only gives one the opportunity to gain wisdom, but it does not mean people take that opportunity.

MadRabbit -> RE: Does older mean wiser? (11/17/2007 11:42:21 AM)
Thank you, Julia. I appreciate that you think so highly of me.

Padriag -> RE: Does older mean wiser? (11/17/2007 11:52:43 AM)
Archer summed it up pretty well. I'll only add this to what he said. Sometimes you'll run into someone who despite their youth has "wisdom beyond their years". All that really means is that you have an unusual individual who has really made the most of the opportunities to learn life has presented them with... and perhaps also life has presented them with more opportunities than the average person. But such individuals are the exception to the rule. Bottom line, in many cases older may mean wiser, younger will probably mean less experienced... but there are exceptions either way. Which is why getting to know someone before you entrust yourself to them is so important.

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Does older mean wiser? (11/17/2007 11:55:48 AM)
One of the sad parts of my growing older is that people won't say as often "You're so wise for your age!" because everyone else will finally start to catch up. I'll still be wiser though :)

DrkJourney -> RE: Does older mean wiser? (11/17/2007 11:56:39 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sweetcreeangel I was wondering for the Older Doms out there...........does older make You wiser or are You still learning different aspects of the lifestyle?Does life-experince over ride a newbie or some one who has been in say 5+ years verses say 16+? basically what i am trying to say with-out meaning disrepect of any kind just because You as a Dom who has years of experince worth more then a Dom that has only say -4 years of experince? Thank-You for taking the time to read my post and answering it i look forward to reading any one's answers Heck no! Not in my case any way...I"m constantly learning. I have experience, but every time I get a new slave I have to start all over again...mainly because he is his own person and you can not necessarily do the same things with him or the same approach to those things as you have done with others. So I"m like a newbie every time I start a new relationship. I won't even go into how many times I've been "played" on this site, when I thought I had all angles covered and couldn't be fooled again....LOL

HeavansKeeper -> RE: Does older mean wiser? (11/17/2007 12:29:17 PM)
Forgive my scientific nature, but a more interesting question is this. "Is a 45 year old dominant with 5 years experience wiser than a 25 year old dominant with 5 years experience?" It truely depends on the relationship. If you're looking for a dominant to train and nurture you, then the trials faced by age will help. He's seen the way life works, and can dote his experience upon you. If you just want someone to exert power over you, it won't make much of a difference. There are two aspects of age. The numerical value and the lessons learned along the way. Many (most) people live life in a cycle. work-work-work-work-work-weekend-work-work-work-work-work-weekend-work-work-daycruise-work-work-weekend. Daycruises usually don't come about every three weeks. With such a cyclical system, it's easy to skip a lot of lessons. Driving the same beat to work, doing the same tasks, interfacing with the same people... These ruts don't facilitate learning. People need to look outside of that for the big lessons. (Of course, there are big lessons to be learned in doing just that). What I'm getting at is this: Being older is correlated to being wise. Being older is not related to being wise. The difference is slim, but important. It seems that many older people are wiser. This is enough to make the factors correlated. The passing of time does not make a person wise. This means they are not related. Your second question is easier to answer and has already been done so. We never stop learning. We never stop getting better at what we do. Even if we're at the top of our game, we can learn to do something faster, easier, or teach it to others more efficiently. I hope this helps a little bit, maybe a cynical point of view can help sort out your confusion.

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