RE: Kink, just wondering....

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

RE: Kink, just wondering....

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Kink, just wondering....

Page: << < prev 1 [2]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: Kink, just wondering.... - 11/17/2007 9:59:55 PM

ChainedExistence

Posts: 507
Joined: 2/5/2005
Status: offline

I don't find the idea of kink to hold more glamour than the reality. If anything, my preconceived ideas were much darker and more frightening to me than the reality that replaced them. I was terrified that once I started down this path that everything I loved and treasured about my life would be stripped away, and I would become some shell of my former self. I was afraid that I would have to undergo unbearable pain and torture from which I could not survive. What I found instead was a loving Dom who could easily exert control without having to make me into a zombie like girl who had lost her will to exist in a "mundane" world. I just get to be a regular girl who has a different way of loving someone. There's nothing so scary about that. Sure, there's some pain, but nothing so terrible that I fear for my own safety or sanity. Now I don't know about "growing together in Perfect Understanding" but I do know that I feel more content, and happy accepting this part of my life than in all the years I spent trying to deny it. What I feared the most is the one thing that had always frightened me...the unknown. Had I known I could feel like this...I would have let the fantasy become a reality a whole lot sooner.

< Message edited by ChainedExistence -- 11/17/2007 10:19:15 PM >

(in reply to Aneirin)

Profile

Post #: 21

RE: Kink, just wondering.... - 11/18/2007 8:20:08 AM

ranja

Posts: 2111
Joined: 11/1/2007
Status: offline

I finally fessed up to my kink, my glamourous fantasies were not enough, now my Husband has bought a very real whip, i expect He shall use it, oh dear...
amanda

(in reply to Aneirin)

Profile

Post #: 22

RE: Kink, just wondering.... - 11/18/2007 8:37:35 AM

phedre81

Posts: 56
Joined: 10/29/2007
Status: offline

Is the idea more glamorous than the reality? Sure.

Me, I'm here to simply gain insight, see what other perspectives and ideas are out there. What I expect of this site (and so far, I haven't been disappointed) is to find a variety of opinions on topics that are relevant and interesting to me.

(in reply to ranja)

Profile

Post #: 23

RE: Kink, just wondering.... - 11/19/2007 3:31:36 AM

ExSteelAgain

Posts: 1803
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Georgia
Status: offline

A person who goes into submissive kink is going to be introduced to sensations that will be darkly erotic, powerful and addicting. Her life is going to be changed in respect to seeking out this type play and domination later. The good part is that she can usually find fulfillment of things she has dreamed about in safe and respectful ways.

I’ve known women who were in bad “vanilla” relationships and situations because they received a degree of domination there. Of course it was all done in ways they were not shown respect.

When these same women find responsible Doms who can give them what they need in a more knowing way without disrespecting them, they are ecstatic and know this is the way of life for them. They move from the abusive type men to Doms who protect and control in the D/s context.

The bad part is that once they get past the lovely sensations, they realize not every Dom will take the step of caring about them. Many Doms will simply use them, albeit in polite and structured ways, in a casual context without worrying about them in other ways.

A good whipping is still good, but it is not mysteriously giving herself to a Master to be cherished and used as was her original glamorous fantasy.

So moving into kink is not by itself a savior, it is finding a compatible and caring person, exactly as in vanilla life.

_____________________________

You can paint a cinder block bright pastel pink, but it's still a cinder block. (By Me.)

(in reply to phedre81)

Profile

Post #: 24