Kana
Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006 Status: offline
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Thats a remarkably sanctimonious opinion. Just because you can't find balance in a relationship without love,who is to say thats not exactly what someone else desires.There are many who seek precisely what she describes. And how could this cause stockholm syndrome anyhow? It doesn't sound as if she is being kept without her will, that she is suffering grave physical and emotional abuse. This is D/S, one serves, one masters. The end.Well, unless its more than one but that numbers, not the ideal.All the other stuff is often secondary. Many people find joy merely in service, the master reciprocates in a variety of ways, love is just one of those options. It can also be discipline, accountability, consistency or just being there. Lets be very clear here, love is a word lots of people throw around, sometimes quite quickly. It is used as a weapon as much as it is used as a kindness, in all wolds, not just BDSM, not just vanilla. It can be used as a tool to shackle another just as it can be used to set someone free.And God knows how many use it as a lever for manipulation and guilt. The things that can be done in the name of love are often horrifying. To me, and this is just me, love is an action. Its a state of being. I can tell you that I love you, but if my actions don't show it, then I am lying. Conversly I can never tell someone that I love them, but all my actions say that I take say I do. That is love. Here is some experience for you. I had a submissive who was in love with me. I loved her in my own way, just not in the same romantic way that she felt. I loved her for who she was, for her kind heart, for her wit and her wisdom, but I was not in love with her.Not wanting to be a liar or a manipulator I never once in over a year said I love you. But every time she had a problem I was there. When she needed help with things I was there. At late night when she needed a shoulder to cry on I was there. When she asked for guidance on things I gave it to her straight, because I cared more about her well being than her feelings. I put her feet to the fire and watched her grow. I taught her modern literature,and shared philosophies of life. She was a better woman for having known me. I shared who I was in completeness, good and bad and opened my life up to her and she did the same.We were confidants, best friends, allies,Master/slave all in one. But I never said I loved her. Is that empty? Is it devoid of emotion? Is she getting "no return on her investment?" Is it colder than Alaska? I don't think so.Love is not the words that I say, people lie all the time. Love is the actions that I take. Watch my feet, they tell the truth of me.
< Message edited by Kana -- 11/19/2007 8:10:52 AM >
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