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RE: A milestone and another step to take. - 11/19/2007 6:25:15 PM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline 		yeah.. that day to day stuff.    I don't actually remember it being difficult with Alandra and I.... but maybe it was at times I don't remember.  I do recall that we learned alot more about what annoyed each other or maybe it wasn't that we learned about it... but we are now confronted with in daily!  I don't expect it to be much different with the three of us as it was with Alandra and I.  We going to be faced with what annoys us on a daily basis.  Funny thing is.. I am actually looking forward to it.  When Alandra and I were courting and developing our relationship, I don't think I appreciate it as much as what I am appreciate the time with the three of us.  Long-distance seems to make you appreciate the little things more.. the little things that can be good or bad.  Either way... a foundation has been established very carefully.  A lot of thought went into it... and in the future it will come time to build on that foundation.

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An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

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Profile   Post #: 21
RE: A milestone and another step to take. - 11/19/2007 6:28:06 PM   
kyraofMists


Posts: 3292
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael
I love books and have four large bookcases full of books and more I don't have room for.  BSB made my very happy when she told me she had already mentally made room for where I could put up a wall (don't panic) of books. 


Only ONE wall????   

Recent inventory of our books not in storage...  700+ 

In storage there are about 7 - 10 boxes of more books.

He is considering using part of his huge dungeon space as a library for all of us.

Thank you for the well wishes.  How do you like the heat?  You move here and some days it is like being in a sauna...

Knight's Kyra

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Profile   Post #: 22
RE: A milestone and another step to take. - 11/19/2007 6:31:24 PM   
Gwynvyd


Posts: 4949
Status: offline 		Congratulations! I am so happy for you all.

Adding more to a living situation is always interesting. No matter how well you all get along, and how much you all love one another.

What has gotten us through in the past was a weekly family meeting. HoH acting as moderator. Any issues or points could be brought up with out fear of retrebution. Only one person could talk at a time.. and the mod moved things along. It was to share the bad as well as the good, and to ask questions, and develop a focus for the household. This way everyone felt they had a forum to go to if there were issues.. or if they just simply wanted to state how happy they were. It saved us a lot of time of folks being hurt, and things blowing up in our faces down the road. The HoH is Dom/me of course and a sub is still a sub and to obey and honor thier duties.. but some times esp. in a new situation everyone needs to get things off thier chest. It really worked for us.

Many blessings on the new part of your journey. Again I am so happy for you all.

Gwyn

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Profile   Post #: 23
RE: A milestone and another step to take. - 11/19/2007 6:33:18 PM   
yourMissTress


Posts: 1665
Joined: 6/14/2005
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline 		Congratulations!  I'm very happy for all three of you! 
 
I wish you all the fun and excitement that comes with working out where the toothbrushes go and other such mundane things that will suddenly become new and exciting. 
 
My best wishes and hopes for your family.

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"If you have to tell people that you are a lady, you are not." My Grandmother


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Profile   Post #: 24
RE: A milestone and another step to take. - 11/19/2007 6:37:29 PM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline 		Michael

Thank you for sharing your thoughtful perspective of things.  I believe you are right that your situation is a little more complicated.  The biggest difference I see is not so much the dynamic but the volume of your stuff in relationship to what room you have.  Kyra actually doesn't have the volume your talking but none the less... I have been culling both stuff out of my house as well as what she will be bringing.  It is rather difficult in that alot of her stuff is actually in storage in Oklahoma.  Rather hard to cull things when you can't remember what one actually has to any detail degree.. and getting rid of it well that is another challenge all together.  Most of my focus has been minimizing my stuff here where I know the room will be needed.  In particular is BOOKS.. Alandra and her are big readers of books and they just finished an inventory of their books they have in their hands... seems I will need a few more book shelves.

Lastly, I want to share that I am very excited for you.  I have noticed a very positive growth in the way you have expressed yourself on the boards since you and BSB involved.  You are still very much direct and loads of common sense... but what I see more than anything is an depth of happiness that was missing before.  I wish both all the very best...


PS... as a person that enjoys wood working... I shed a tear for the lost of the lathe.

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Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

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Profile   Post #: 25
RE: A milestone and another step to take. - 11/19/2007 7:05:57 PM   
TemptingNviceSub


Posts: 3054
Joined: 10/1/2005
Status: offline 		Congratulations!..I have always loved a happy ending..and a HAPPY beginning!!..Tempting

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Profile   Post #: 26
RE: A milestone and another step to take. - 11/19/2007 7:08:45 PM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		Congratulations!  I wish you all the best.

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Profile   Post #: 27
RE: A milestone and another step to take. - 11/19/2007 7:12:14 PM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

and Irish... the time line is actually on the short side.  We are a good 6 months ahead of schedule of when we could of reasonable expected to have received an answer.

LOL it seems like ya'll have been talking about her move forever

I am glad that the wait is finally at it's end though



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Profile   Post #: 28
RE: A milestone and another step to take. - 11/19/2007 7:21:37 PM   
windchymes


Posts: 9410
Joined: 4/18/2005
Status: offline 		America's loss is Canada's gain!  It's always nice to hear about a happy ending.  I wish you all the very best for a wonderful future together!

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Profile   Post #: 29
RE: A milestone and another step to take. - 11/19/2007 7:29:43 PM   
MaamJay


Posts: 2101
Joined: 9/2/2005
Status: offline 		Congrats to all 3 of you ... and to Michael and BSB too! Great to see happiness on the boards!

Re moving ... well Master originally moved into my home which, as Michael said, was a bit tricky, especially as I was still married at the time to a hubby who was trying to be a sub. As it happened, he was the one who earned most money, so it didn't seem appropriate for Master to assume total financial control! He wasn't really able to be "Dom of the whole house", just Dom of me. As others have said, it was the little habits that are the annoying things, and people just have to be prepared to voice that at regular meetings before it drives you into exploding! Each person having their own private space is really important too, a little bolthole for some time out helps a lot.

Knight, while You are in a different position from Me in that I am Dom to one and sub to the other, You are Dominant to both, You are still the One who has Your time shared between 2 ... in other words, You are the One most in demand. The hardest thing I have found is to have "My Me time" ... private time. It's easy to feel guilty that You aren't sharing it with one or the other. However, given that Your 2 girls have such a strong friendship, that may not be as much of an issue for You. And I am sure You will speak up if You find they are spending too much time together and ignoring You!

I wish all the moves great success ... and that not too much stuff has to be sacrificed! Can't say Master and I did much of that ... when We moved here, We brought 100 pieces of furniture and over 200 boxes!! Good luck!

Maam Jay aka violet[A]

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Profile   Post #: 30
RE: A milestone and another step to take. - 11/19/2007 7:30:15 PM   
MzMia


Posts: 5333
Joined: 7/30/2004
Status: offline 		Congratulations!
Thanks for sharing KOM, you all seem to fit so well together,
and you all contribute so much to the CM community!
May you have many, many happy years to come.

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Namaste'
To Each His/Her Own
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Profile   Post #: 31
RE: A milestone and another step to take. - 11/19/2007 8:01:56 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline
quote:

Today we have received official notice that Kyra's application for immigration into Canada has been Approved! 


I am so happy for all three of you, please accept both Sinergy and my heart felt congratulations..

Sinergy and julia

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Profile   Post #: 32
RE: A milestone and another step to take. - 11/19/2007 9:07:19 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

So.. besides sharing a Milestone achieved..... I am looking to start a dialogue on other peoples experiences with regards to moving into together.   What did you find that was challenging and what did you find fantastic.  What do you think you did right and what would you do differently.

Things changed LOL.  I know, big duh there.  But it was so different living through it rather than intellectually knowing it.

Six months in, we no longer had those little intimate secrets, we had hours of lounging in bed.  I no longer had my special "drawer" in his room- I had my own room!  We no longer had our fond freezing mornings goodbye, I tried to be quiet so I wouldn't wake him on my way to work so he could get an extra 15 minutes.

There's a cozy comfort, but also an understanding that evolving sometimes means growing out of some things and into others, and that you have to create new things together rather than allowing the situation of tension from lack of time pull it together for you.

What we did right- each have our own room, each buy groceries together, each agree on decorations together.  We created our space as OUR space. 

What we would do differently- ok honestly, not have moved in with the other roommate (then partner of mine)

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Profile   Post #: 33
RE: A milestone and another step to take. - 11/19/2007 10:03:12 PM   
astarri


Posts: 265
Joined: 4/22/2007
Status: offline 		Congratulations to all 3 of you. From all i have read you have great communication, trust, and dedication. It will see you through much i would think.

Welcome to Canada kyra ... hope you like the cold lol

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Profile   Post #: 34
RE: A milestone and another step to take. - 11/19/2007 10:24:43 PM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline 		Heartfelt congratulations from my House to yours!

Master Fire


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Profile   Post #: 35
RE: A milestone and another step to take. - 11/19/2007 10:41:57 PM   
Valyraen


Posts: 746
Joined: 2/14/2007
Status: offline 		First of all, congratulations and best wishes from the bottom of my black heart!

Moving in... to this day, it still tickles me that I was the only person who thought I was only going to be moving in with Kitten for a few months until I found my own place. It's two weeks shy of a year that we've been living together now, so you can imagine that my plans changed.

One of the most enormously challenging things about the two of us living together is that this isn't my house. Her parents own the house and I rent from them, which means that I often have to curb my initial reaction to something and instead wait for what seems to me like an inordinately long time for the lines of communication to reach a decision - and out of the four of us (her parents, Kitten, and I), I'm the only person who seems capable of reaching a decision in anything less than a week! In some respects, I wish sometimes that I had moved into an apartment of my own, where the preferences that I have for doing things could be the rules that I set up. It's particularly difficult to know what needs to be done but be unable to do it, as I'm not the sort of man to cool my heels when the solution seems painfully obvious to me. On the other hand, I've become much more patient since I moved in, so I suppose some good has come from this, after all.

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Profile   Post #: 36
RE: A milestone and another step to take. - 11/20/2007 1:06:48 AM   
BossyShoeBitch


Posts: 3931
Joined: 1/13/2007
From: South Florida
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael


I am looking forward to cooking with BSB but again, this is something that I think we can share the joy of. 

I think the issue that will cause the most strife is I HATE having a bed covered in pillows.  I like the look but when I want to get in bed, I want to get in bed, I don't want to have to neatly pile pillows and then replace them in the morning.  I guess I will just have to tell her to prepare my bed at night and arrange it in the morning.


seriously?  well then.. the pillows are gone!!


I'd like to offer my sincere congratulations as well to the three of you..  I just love the dynamic between your family members and wish you all only good wishes and happiness in the future.. And Kyra,  maybe we can get to that munch before you move away??

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A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

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Profile   Post #: 37
RE: A milestone and another step to take. - 11/20/2007 3:47:24 AM   
Cyntilating


Posts: 581
Joined: 6/19/2007
Status: offline 		{Long-distance seems to make you appreciate the little things more.. the little things that can be good or bad.}

This is certainly true...smiles
 
{a foundation has been established very carefully.  A lot of thought went into it... and in the future it will come time to build on that foundation. }

The three of you have created such a strong foundation.  It is always inspiring to read what you choose to share here.
I'm sure you know you will have dozens watching your adjustments and new insights as well......no pressure tho' ..chuckling..
 
Congratulations on your wonderful news and my best wishes to the 3 of you and yours on the new journey down this exciting new path. 
 
 
 



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.."There are two ways of spreading light: to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it. " Edith Wharton

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Profile   Post #: 38
RE: A milestone and another step to take. - 11/20/2007 4:06:03 AM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline 		congrats to everyone.

for me moving from online to phone to 24/7 is quite nerve-wrecking right now since i've lived  "single mom" for so long that it's going to take some time having a man around here me constantly. i haven't cooked for a guy in years so let's hope i don't poison him with my famous chicken fajitas - LOL.  seriously, my fiance and i talked about this a lot which is why he's spending 2 to 3 with us in Jan to help with wedding ideas and packing but mainly to help me reacquaint myself having a male in the house beside my ex picking up UMs for visitation.

i think that's going to be our biggest challenge - what to keep, toss and sell/giveaway. he has a huge collection of movie/radio as well as his stuff where he lives and i have a growing collection of things collected from bands (we're planning to open a museum one day) ...plus i have books, CDs, movies and the UMs things etc.  so i'm in the process of making a detailed list of what i'm definitely taking and what's staying behind. besides that there's a laundry list of other things i have to do before moving in Aug which i'll tackle as the move date draws closer.




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Profile   Post #: 39
RE: A milestone and another step to take. - 11/20/2007 5:26:15 AM   
dawntreader


Posts: 3045
Joined: 11/23/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists


Today we have received official notice that Kyra's application for immigration into Canada has been Approved! 




Congratulations!!!!!!

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(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 40
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