Being "Too nice"

Being "Too nice" (Full Version)

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dominic2008 -> Being "Too nice" (11/20/2007 2:05:58 AM)
Below is a short excerpt from a vanilla site that discusses how men should behave with women The owner of the site constantly harps on about not being "Too nice" to womenand I would love your opinion on this So here it is......................................................... I have a girlfriend who is a perfect 10, but she has the worst luck with men. Know why? They are TOO NICE TO HER!!!!!!!! I was sitting out by the pool with her this past weekend, and listening to her talk about the latest guy she's dating. He's cute, attentive, sweet, thoughtful, generous, funny, and a tiger in bed!! BUT, she told me that he isn't the "one." I asked her why, and this is exactly what she said, "He's too agreeable. Everything I say is OK with him...anything I want to do, go, or think is OK with him. I'm getting bored. He doesn't have enough personality for me. He's always smiling, and my thirteen year old daughter even says he's a wuss for being so nice all the time. I want a man who's a challenge."

LadyDove -> RE: Being "Too nice" (11/20/2007 2:54:18 AM)
Seems someone has already trained him!! LOL Now I would be saying... what a good boy!! To each their own... now if I can just get rid of the damn vanilla cone over my name Ill be happy.

AFlyInYourWeb -> RE: Being "Too nice" (11/20/2007 4:33:41 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyDove Seems someone has already trained him!! LOL Now I would be saying... what a good boy!! To each their own... now if I can just get rid of the damn vanilla cone over my name Ill be happy. Just keep posting. I think the changeover is at 25 posts.

IrishMist -> RE: Being "Too nice" (11/20/2007 4:54:38 AM)
Actually I can understand what she is saying. While undivided attention is nice on occassion; it does make for a pretty boring relationship after a time.

camille65 -> RE: Being "Too nice" (11/20/2007 4:57:42 AM)
I consider 'too nice' in that context to be too passive. Been there & yuck. I didn't like it one bit.It is one thing to be agreeable but quite another to have no opinions or desires of ones own.

Mezrem -> RE: Being "Too nice" (11/20/2007 5:11:11 AM)
I have heard this often enough in the hum drum of life. Men in general have been taught by our culture in general to be this way.. that it is what is expected if you are not a cave man waiting in the shadows to hit a woman over the head so you can pull her back to your cave. For my part I agree with Dominic2008 I would pat him on the head, tell him he is a good boy and enjoy. [:)]

juliaoceania -> RE: Being "Too nice" (11/20/2007 5:17:42 AM)
I will not be with someone that is not "nice". What she describes is not about "niceness", it is about feeling as though the person you're with does not have views of their own, anything they are passionate about... in other words, someone who will suck up what they feel to please the person they are with... that to me is not about being "nice"

Synocense -> RE: Being "Too nice" (11/20/2007 5:35:10 AM)
OOooo yay! Give me the cave man.

IrishMist -> RE: Being "Too nice" (11/20/2007 5:40:05 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Synocense OOooo yay! Give me the cave man. Ditto LOL Caveman any day /nods

MasterGremlin -> RE: Being "Too nice" (11/20/2007 5:48:56 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: dominic2008 Below is a short excerpt from a vanilla site that discusses how men should behave with women The owner of the site constantly harps on about not being "Too nice" to womenand I would love your opinion on this So here it is......................................................... I have a girlfriend who is a perfect 10, but she has the worst luck with men. Know why? They are TOO NICE TO HER!!!!!!!! I was sitting out by the pool with her this past weekend, and listening to her talk about the latest guy she's dating. He's cute, attentive, sweet, thoughtful, generous, funny, and a tiger in bed!! BUT, she told me that he isn't the "one." I asked her why, and this is exactly what she said, "He's too agreeable. Everything I say is OK with him...anything I want to do, go, or think is OK with him. I'm getting bored. He doesn't have enough personality for me. He's always smiling, and my thirteen year old daughter even says he's a wuss for being so nice all the time. I want a man who's a challenge." And when she breaks up with him, he's going to get mad because he "gave her everything she ever wanted" and "nice guys always finish last". YUCK! gives me the heebyjeebies just thinking about it. There is a big difference between a "nice guy" and a "jellyfish". But then, I have never liked the kind of guy you could wrap around your little finger. Give me a man who can lead with confidence and conviction...even if it is in the wrong direction, it's better than a "jellyfish" any day. Sincerely, minxy [:)]

MadRabbit -> RE: Being "Too nice" (11/20/2007 10:04:31 AM)
Awww....beautiful women.... It's so easy to take something really great for granted because of some small annoyance or defect when you can just scoop up the next guy for a date out of the whole armada of dick-thinking men looking to feel some titties. It utterly amazes me how I can find very little difference between clothes shopping and dating with some women.

Jeffff -> RE: Being "Too nice" (11/20/2007 10:14:45 AM)
There is a difference between kindness and weakness. There is also a difference between rage and agression. it is probably best not too mistake them Jeff

tdslittlehelper -> RE: Being "Too nice" (11/20/2007 10:39:42 AM)
no one wants a yes man.. I mean I have a Sir because I like it when I say.. "where are we going, what should I buy, Can I dye my hair..." He has the answer... Can I make all of those choices on my own? Sure. Do I like having someone to make them for me? OMG yep...

Lkg4MstrSacramen -> RE: Being "Too nice" (11/20/2007 10:40:26 AM)
lacking personality or passion is different from being too passive; some men just worship women naturally, and it has nothing to do with whether they are submissive/slaves/or dommes. They just worship women. period.

ownedgirlie -> RE: Being "Too nice" (11/20/2007 10:45:38 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: tdslittlehelper no one wants a yes man.. I mean I have a Sir because I like it when I say.. "where are we going, what should I buy, Can I dye my hair..." He has the answer... Can I make all of those choices on my own? Sure. Do I like having someone to make them for me? OMG yep... Many Dominant Women enjoy yes men. [;)] I have a friend who is like the guy described in the OP. Nicest guy in the world, and can't understand why women don't stick around. I won't advise him to change who he is, though, I help by advising him what kind of women to look for. He needs to be true to himself, and being true to himself is someone who loves doting on a woman and bringing her pleasure and happiness. I spent far too long trying to be what I'm not, so I won't advise anyone else to do the same. Instead, I invited him to be my pet. [:D]

servilecat -> RE: Being "Too nice" (11/20/2007 10:50:55 AM)
i'm sure we hear this quite often but first it is most likely that there is not something lacking in him but in her.....She probably loves chaos and confrontation and a challenge. That's not a bad thing as long as you can find the right partner. She most likely wont be happy without a little drama and chaos. Sometimes even in small increments is enough to add the emotional sting of chaos...some would call it passion, some masochistic LOL

gorgeous1 -> RE: Being "Too nice" (11/20/2007 10:57:23 AM)
A guy who's too nice in too many ways is a turn off. What I loved about my husband when we first met was that he was Chivalrous, yet a bit chauvanistic, treated me like a princess, yet let me know he was King, NEVER embarrasses me in front of others, yet makes me blush when we're alone... One time he said to me, "I guess I'm a nice guy. Is it true nice guys always finish last?" I told him it doesn't matter who was first, it's who's last that matters.

Tigrita -> RE: Being "Too nice" (11/20/2007 11:00:34 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MadRabbit Awww....beautiful women.... It's so easy to take something really great for granted because of some small annoyance or defect when you can just scoop up the next guy for a date out of the whole armada of dick-thinking men looking to feel some titties. It utterly amazes me how I can find very little difference between clothes shopping and dating with some women. Weren't you one of the ones in a thread a while ago adamantly proclaiming how you refuse to be percieved as 'nice'? Ah, right, I suppose if you gave this girl props for sharing your viewpoint it would be too *nice* of you. And as for shopping and dating, absolutely analogous. I would *neeeeeeever* settle for an outfit that did less than compliment and enhance and express my personality to a T, and wold search far and wide, and wait many moons for that perfect piece to finish off an outfit, and sometimes stumble uppon it in the most delightful and unexpected places or when I'm not even looking for it. =) You don't know how picky some women are about their clothes, do you? All in good fun. Loosen up a little MR. When was the last time you smiled?

LadyHibiscus -> RE: Being "Too nice" (11/20/2007 11:54:17 AM)
I am not one of those dommes just looking for some guy to repeat my orders. A robot is not an amusing companion. That said, give me a nice guy! I hate fighting, I hate drama, I love peace and quiet and compatibility. I require a tiger in bed, at the very least. (no cavemen, thanks, they are one-trick ponies) It is entirely possible to be nice AND boring. The number of really boring people out there in the world is amazing to me. May they all go to eharmony and hook up with each other, pronto! No amount of nice can make up for lack of personality. No amount of nice can make up for being a jellyfish. Aaksha mentioned in a thread that the difference between a sub and a chump is one nut sack, and dang if that isn't right!

DiurnalVampire -> RE: Being "Too nice" (11/20/2007 11:58:23 AM)
OP: To each their own. I cant deal with someone who has no opinions of their own, and who agrees with everything I say no matter what. I do have slaves, but they have their own opinions and ideas. Some women want someone who can be the "man" some dont. Sounds like she just needs to stop getting involved with the wrong sort of man. DV

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