RE: Mia's Thanksgiving Question--How long before you collar a submissive?

RE: Mia's Thanksgiving Question--How long before you collar a submissive? (Full Version)

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DarkDaddyZ -> RE: Mia's Thanksgiving Question--How long before you collar a submissive? (11/23/2007 2:51:09 PM)
I've collared a slave that I met 14 days prior, and we were together 5 and half years. I've collared a slave that I've known for a year and we lasted 3 months. It really depends on the maturity and desire to build and grown in the relationship. Z-

LadyPact -> RE: Mia's Thanksgiving Question--How long before you collar a submissive? (11/23/2007 2:57:46 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MstrDennynSlave quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact My current submissive accepted My collar after about three months. That's quick by a lot of people's standard. In fact, it's rather fast for My own standard, but the pace was sped up due to the particular situation that W/we share. Without going into great lengthy details, it's sufficient to say that the circumstances encouraged things move a little faster than I would normally have taken. If you knew you didn't have all of the time in the world, would you seize the opportunity that you had in front of you today? Some of U/us do. Master and I did just that ourselves. Master collared me 2 months after first meeting. We both new we didnt have all the time in the world. We are making the most of the time we do have, and loving every minute of it. I just wanted to say thank you for sharing that. I, also, take a collar very seriously. In fact, I've only collared two, and had one close miss. When a couple of folks brought it to My attention that three months was a bit fast, I pointed out the fact that I don't give them out as party favors. My boy has just always been Mine from the beginning. That's just how it was. The time frame of how long it takes to put one on doesn't matter all that much. Sometimes, people find each other and it works out wonderfully for years. How many people have met, fell in love quickly, and married for the rest of their lives? It happens, and it's a beautiful thing.

MissSCD -> RE: Mia's Thanksgiving Question--How long before you collar a submissive? (11/23/2007 6:38:30 PM)
MsMia: I like the old D/s way of collaring. For example, I started my slave out with a training collar while we were communicating and learning each other. When we started dating and becoming serious, I put him under consideration. When we became engaged, I got an engagement ring and he got a permanet collar. That process took about a year. We have been engaged for three years total. Keep looking. You will find one worthy enough to wear your collar, and you will know when to collar them. Regards, MissSCD

SDFemDom4cuck -> RE: Mia's Thanksgiving Question--How long before you collar a submissive? (11/23/2007 8:10:02 PM)
Collar Schmoller. I just toss them in the basement and chain them to a pole. I don't need no stinkin collar. Although it helps to make sure they're lonely orphans who won't be missed by anyone. More seriously....I was with someone for almost 7 years and never collared him. Tattooed? Yes. Pierced? Yes. Another I was with for 2 years and collared him after 6 months. I think it depends on the relationship itself and the individuals involved. I've had a bit of a belated Turkey day celebration with a skoosh too much Pinot Noir.

MzMia -> RE: Mia's Thanksgiving Question--How long before you collar a submissive? (11/23/2007 8:27:32 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SDFemDom4cuck Collar Schmoller. I just toss them in the basement and chain them to a pole. I don't need no stinkin collar. Although it helps to make sure they're lonely orphans who won't be missed by anyone. More seriously....I was with someone for almost 7 years and never collared him. Tattooed? Yes. Pierced? Yes. Another I was with for 2 years and collared him after 6 months. I think it depends on the relationship itself and the individuals involved. I've had a bit of a belated Turkey day celebration with a skoosh too much Pinot Noir. [sm=hello.gif] I am waving hello to the spirited Ms. Jo! I love your spunk, young lady! Well, everyone is not into collaring, I can understand that. But it is still something I would love to do one day, and as hard as I have been busting my behind lately Ms Jo, I will make him my household work slave instead of throwing him into the basement!

SDFemDom4cuck -> RE: Mia's Thanksgiving Question--How long before you collar a submissive? (11/23/2007 8:33:57 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MzMia quote: ORIGINAL: SDFemDom4cuck Collar Schmoller. I just toss them in the basement and chain them to a pole. I don't need no stinkin collar. Although it helps to make sure they're lonely orphans who won't be missed by anyone. More seriously....I was with someone for almost 7 years and never collared him. Tattooed? Yes. Pierced? Yes. Another I was with for 2 years and collared him after 6 months. I think it depends on the relationship itself and the individuals involved. I've had a bit of a belated Turkey day celebration with a skoosh too much Pinot Noir. [sm=hello.gif] I am waving hello to the spirited Ms. Jo! I love your spunk, young lady! Well, everyone is not into collaring, I can understand that. But it is still something I would love to do one day, and as hard as I have been busting my behind lately Ms Jo, I will make him my household work slave instead of throwing him into the basement! Sheesh... I only throw the ones I'm going to eat the brains out of in the basement. If I actually ever found one that would be that ideal male wife I would collar him in a heartbeat.

MzMia -> RE: Mia's Thanksgiving Question--How long before you collar a submissive? (11/23/2007 8:36:20 PM)
You are a very, very, bad lady! lol No soup for you!

SDFemDom4cuck -> RE: Mia's Thanksgiving Question--How long before you collar a submissive? (11/23/2007 8:42:02 PM)
the hell with soup...I want more Pinot Noir.

southernhart -> RE: Mia's Thanksgiving Question--How long before you collar a submissive? (11/23/2007 9:08:13 PM)
Since both my owner and i believe that a collar is wedding ring and we want to have a collaring ceremony. He has said that ater one year of service to him i will be officially collared. He has though reffered to me a time or two as collared. So it's very emotional for both of us.

MzMia -> RE: Mia's Thanksgiving Question--How long before you collar a submissive? (11/23/2007 9:45:34 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: southernhart Since both my owner and i believe that a collar is wedding ring and we want to have a collaring ceremony. He has said that ater one year of service to him i will be officially collared. He has though reffered to me a time or two as collared. So it's very emotional for both of us. Awww, this is how I feel. I want a serious and solid committment when I collar. I rather never collar someone, that to take it lightly. Good luck to you.

domiguy -> RE: Mia's Thanksgiving Question--How long before you collar a submissive? (11/23/2007 9:47:34 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: southernhart Since both my owner and i believe that a collar is wedding ring and we want to have a collaring ceremony. He has said that ater one year of service to him i will be officially collared. He has though reffered to me a time or two as collared. So it's very emotional for both of us. I would tell my sub the same thing....If there is a God above hopefully she will buy into it....You see, Illinois is not a common law state.....For some reason they just don't recognize a collar as being all that meaningful..... (After a ten year relationship Domiguy kicks subsusie to the curb) subsusie shows up in court and though she can't seem to stop crying manages to whimper to the judge...."But he gave me this" The Judge leans over his bench and stares into her shaking hands..."What is that you are clutching?".....subsusie continues on while wiping the snot from her face,..."why it's a collar...It's like we were married" ....The judge lets out a loud belly laugh and then stares down at subsusie while shaking his head and says...."you poor and pathetic little dumb thing.....Case dismissed!!!"

MzMia -> RE: Mia's Thanksgiving Question--How long before you collar a submissive? (11/23/2007 9:59:03 PM)
Poor little DG has been bad, and is now in time-out. We missed you when you were gone DG, and I will be glad when you get out of time out. [:D]

Ecossaise -> RE: Mia's Thanksgiving Question--How long before you collar a submissive? (11/23/2007 10:39:55 PM)
All the answers I have read and noted seem to hit the nail on the head, even though the time spans differ. I knew it was right to collar My own when I... well... heared music playing! {smiles} M

RRafe -> RE: Mia's Thanksgiving Question--How long before you collar a submissive? (11/23/2007 10:49:53 PM)
Judging from how most I see in D/s use them, I shuold go into making velcro ones with little luggage tags-the sort with clear windows that you can slip the cardboard tags in and out of. That say "_____is mine, until I get tired of it-or it pisses me off." My experiences over the years have given me pretty good reasons to see collars as not as meaningful as they are cracked up to be. I really do wish that people would forget the silly symbols-and concentrate on getting thier shit togeher instead.

SeraphinaKrow -> RE: Mia's Thanksgiving Question--How long before you collar a submissive? (11/24/2007 1:51:12 AM)
Well it all depends, Some people do it differently. A friend of mine (I live in a poly BDSM friendly household) collars her slave when he is present in the house, and when he leaves, he is uncollared. She says that it reminds him that while he is wearing the collar, he doesn't belong to anyone but them (Master and Mistress Couple). Taking off the collar signifies that he is on his own until he returns. For me, if I was to give out a collar, I would suggest that the person I am collaring belongs to me and I to them. It has a different meaning than marriage (yuck) to me. I believe it is a bond of trust, and love for one another. It is more sacred than just being submissive to your Dominant, it's knowing what your Dominant feels and needs all the time and visa versa... [sm=crop.gif] Ok enough mushiness for me... I can't take anymore... lets get back to spanking issues... lol j/k

southernhart -> MzMia/Rrafe (11/24/2007 4:19:39 AM)
Thanks MzMia and to You too. RRafe, You are so right. What You said is so perfect.

domiguy -> RE: Mia's Thanksgiving Question--How long before you collar a submissive? (11/24/2007 7:29:11 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MzMia Poor little DG has been bad, and is now in time-out. We missed you when you were gone DG, and I will be glad when you get out of time out. [:D] I don't know if you noticed my prequalifications to earn my collar.....You will be mine. Just a little more time it will be a year....Regardless of whether I have to drag you down to the pool myself....You will wear my collar....skank.

ricksub42 -> RE: Mia's Thanksgiving Question--How long before you collar a submissive? (11/25/2007 6:08:30 AM)
I've had to give back a collar, and here is my story. This happened several years ago and I can look back at the time with the proper amount of hindsight. I was new in term of finally knowing other people in the lifestyle.I probably had known I was a sub before I knew what the lifestyle was and slowly found out about the lifestyle and later going on line found others and a local munch group. A wonderful woman agree to take me on , train me ,what ever word or pharse you want to you. We talked, got together socially, did the group activities. I think most subs want a collar badly, I'd suspect most Dom/mes equally badly wish to collar someone,It's a sign we belong and are well on the way in our journey in the lifestyle. I think that feeling was so strong that the collar was given to quickly and accepted to quickly. Accepting the collar is as important of an act as giving it in the yin and yang of the lifestyle.I wanted one so bad, especially from this woman that I never gave a second thought and I suspect neither did she. The relationship, particulary the D/s aspect sped up too fast for either of us and month and half later she asked for it back and I gave it back. It trustly was the best decision for both us.Incidentally there were several collaring about the same time and only 1 of them worked out long term. It's a heavy commitment and one that should be given with careful thought of it is right both both parties.It's like anything in the vanilla world, you may want to get married to a person but should you. I think all the replies in this thread have been good ones but the one that really struck me was give the collar when you realize you want to wake up and be with this person everyday for the rest of your life. The line from the movie applies "You complete me". When you reach the point where you say can say that, Then it's the right time, imho. rick

RRafe -> RE: Mia's Thanksgiving Question--How long before you collar a submissive? (11/25/2007 6:43:34 AM)
One reason I refuse to give collars is this. Too oftne,it seems to tell a slave that they have "arrived". And then they get complacent. I NEVER want property to feel that they have to stop trying. But I base things on performance-not jusrt romance.

ghitaPVH -> RE: Mia's Thanksgiving Question--How long before you collar a submissive? (11/25/2007 7:58:28 AM)
My Sir and I have been together for 5 years now..going on 6 this feb. We went at things a little backwards but, shrugs....it worked for us. There was this guy working in the warehouse where I worked who kept picking on my accent over the radio, so I finally asked him out to dinner and took him home afterwards and fucked him. He never left. Moved in that night. We aquired a house and a boat and three cars and a houseful of UMs and a dog and a few cats and finally this past march we got around to making it all official and got married. I didnt recieve an actual collar until this September. So for us.....5 years...thats how long.

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