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southernhart -> To all Dominants (11/24/2007 6:41:33 AM)

What are Your opinons and feelings about having a sub/slave/property that already has a Master/Mistress and wants to be with You too. serving two Dominants, but at different times and different places.



Dragynsfury -> RE: To all Dominants (11/24/2007 6:48:46 AM)

If it's a poly home I could see it.  Are we talking in a casual play sense or committed sense?  Two different spins. 



candleTC -> RE: To all Dominants (11/24/2007 6:52:37 AM)

me, personally, would have to shoot myself in the head.  It takes alot out of me to serve One fully and completely.  If i have commited myself to Him fully, i feel like i would be shorting another Dominant.  If someone wants ME, then i would imagine they want all of me. 



southernhart -> RE: To all Dominants (11/24/2007 6:54:09 AM)

No Poly, just a sub who has a Master and wants another one. The sub considers D/s all play and is not really committed to anyonbe.



Mezrem -> RE: To all Dominants (11/24/2007 6:58:35 AM)

Been there and done that.. my patner plays often with another dominate. I know him and he knows the rules we live by. So long as the rules are followed I don't have a problem with it.



Dragynsfury -> RE: To all Dominants (11/24/2007 6:59:45 AM)

Oh, thanks for the clarity.  I actually would not want that if this person was just doing it for casual play.  I seek long term.  So would not work. Does the Master give consent would be the other question.



SimplyMichael -> RE: To all Dominants (11/24/2007 7:02:41 AM)

If it works for them AND their partners then I say it is better than half the other bdsm relationships out there.

If it is built on lies, insecurities, or whatnot then it is about the same as the other half of bdsm relationships



RRafe -> RE: To all Dominants (11/24/2007 7:03:13 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: southernhart

What are Your opinons and feelings about having a sub/slave/property that already has a Master/Mistress and wants to be with You too. serving two Dominants, but at different times and different places.


I need clear title to take d/s seriously.



SimplyMichael -> RE: To all Dominants (11/24/2007 7:11:18 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: RRafe

quote:

ORIGINAL: southernhart

What are Your opinons and feelings about having a sub/slave/property that already has a Master/Mistress and wants to be with You too. serving two Dominants, but at different times and different places.


I need clear title to take d/s seriously.


Why?  My only collared submissive was married and I clearly did NOT have title to her, but sitting with her husband watching TV with her at my feet, that d/s was as real as any I have had with people who lived with me.  My current partner is again married (gee, could it be a pattern?) and the control I have over her and her depth of submission to me is deeper than any I have felt and deeper than many other relationships of friends and aquaitences (although Merc and Beth are amazing!).

So again, why?



eyesopened -> RE: To all Dominants (11/24/2007 7:11:44 AM)

i have had non-exclusive relationships in the past.  Can i serve more than one Dominant?  of course!  Why people tend to think poly should be one Dominant with many submissives but not the other way around is a logic that escapes me.  If i have a Dominant that i can only see once in a while and doesn't fulfill all my needs, what would be wrong with adding another playmate as long as everything is up-front and honest? 

i am now extremely happy in a totally monogomous relationship and my Master does fulfill all my needs and i fulfill His.  Our relationship goals are totally in synch and we don't need to complicate our relationship by adding others.

When relationships goals are shared, the relationship works, whether it's having more than one partner or whether it's monogomy or whatever.  It's only when moving in different directions do the problems begin.



SimplyMichael -> RE: To all Dominants (11/24/2007 7:13:05 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: eyesopened

i have had non-exclusive relationships in the past.  Can i serve more than one Dominant?  of course!  Why people tend to think poly should be one Dominant with many submissives but not the other way around is a logic that escapes me.  If i have a Dominant that i can only see once in a while and doesn't fulfill all my needs, what would be wrong with adding another playmate as long as everything is up-front and honest? 

i am now extremely happy in a totally monogomous relationship and my Master does fulfill all my needs and i fulfill His.  Our relationship goals are totally in synch and we don't need to complicate our relationship by adding others.

When relationships goals are shared, the relationship works, whether it's having more than one partner or whether it's monogomy or whatever.  It's only when moving in different directions do the problems begin.


GREAT answer!



Vanatru -> RE: To all Dominants (11/24/2007 8:30:04 AM)

I won't play second fiddle, and in the end where there's more than one dominant, one of them winds up in the alpha position. So why set myself up for a chase when I can be the one in charge? And if the SUB is deciding, guess who really is in charge? The sub of course. And I won't have that either.



MrSpectacular -> RE: To all Dominants (11/24/2007 8:37:45 AM)

For me it is a moot point - I am not into long distance relationships -  I like the touch and feel of my sub. I certainly would not want to share her. 



sambamanslilgirl -> RE: To all Dominants (11/24/2007 9:06:00 AM)

fast reply

i have two Doms (Daddy and SO) and neither are jealous of the other. my SO respects my relationship with Daddy and vice versa, Daddy respects my relationship with SO. in fact He's the one who planned this goal for me. it might sound confusing serving two "masters" yet it's not to me. i have a Daddy and a husband ...a family in the BDSM-sense.

i'm looking forward to spending real time with my SO after we're married and moved to Oregon in August however i'll always still have (and serve) Daddy.



SimplyMichael -> RE: To all Dominants (11/24/2007 10:59:48 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Vanatru

I won't play second fiddle, and in the end where there's more than one dominant, one of them winds up in the alpha position.


Only if the participants lack clarity over what they want and what they are offering.  If someone enters into a part time relationship with the secret goal of becoming some sort of alpha then that person at best lacks self knowledge and at worst is a manipulative asshole.

quote:

  So why set myself up for a chase when I can be the one in charge?


If someone is offering a part time relationship, there is no "chase".  If you want to be the sole dominant, don't seek a part time partner.

quote:

  And if the SUB is deciding, guess who really is in charge? The sub of course. And I won't have that either.


Submissives can't top from the bottom unless the dominant is too inexperienced or too weak to deal with them.  That said, if someone says "I want two part time dominants" she is no more topping than a submissive saying "I won't do scat play".  The whole point of BDSM is to seek YOUR truth, YOUR path and it provides a way and a language to find others who shares that truth and path.

So, the fact that it doesn't work for you (just as vanilla works for vanillas, and doesn't work for us) should ONLY mean, it doesn't work for you.



Focus50 -> RE: To all Dominants (11/24/2007 12:24:11 PM)

Not acceptable - I don't just play with available fem/sub "meat".  If she's already got someone else then I'm not interested by default....
 
Focus.



tricia -> RE: To all Dominants (11/24/2007 3:12:23 PM)

I think you can have many dominants but only one Master.



Sirandlil1 -> RE: To all Dominants (11/24/2007 5:14:20 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: southernhart

What are Your opinons and feelings about having a sub/slave/property that already has a Master/Mistress and wants to be with You too. serving two Dominants, but at different times and different places.


Never works...how can you serve two Dominants??



SimplyMichael -> RE: To all Dominants (11/24/2007 5:43:06 PM)

My god the lack of imagination and creativity displayed in this thread is shocking.  "It doesn't work for me" is fine, I can understand that, but "it can't happen"?  Give me a break.

If sally obeys sammy during the week and jill on the weekends, she is obeying sammy and jill period.  That's like saying if someone lets their submissive out of their sight, she isn't "property" or "isn't being submissive" or whatever. 

This is the same idiocy that says a switch can't be a "real" dominant or any of the other "one twue way" BS!



IrishMist -> RE: To all Dominants (11/24/2007 5:46:47 PM)

quote:

how can you serve two Dominants??


This is where I am at. Confusion.

I know that there are those who DO serve more than one successfully ( a Dom/Domme household ) and yet, I still have a hard time understanding serving two who are not in some way linked with each other.



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