MistressDolly
Posts: 917
Joined: 8/24/2006
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quote:
ORIGINAL: SeraphinaKrow
I'm pretty sure this question has been asked a million trillion times, but I would like to know what everyone thinks.
I was reading on the ask a sub/slave forum about whether or not, as a sub or a slave do you have to love your Master/Mistress in order to serve them...
My personal thought and experience is that I personally have to have some type of mental, emotional connection with a person to become their Dominant on a personal level. I find that I am more interested in making sure that they achieve their personal goals in life, as well as in their lives as submissives...
I do not push boundaries unless they are discussed and I take my time to be stern when needed (especially when they are new to BDSM and D/s lifestyle play.)
I also feel as though I am more pleased when they take care of themselves, rather then serving me completely... I believe that in order to submit fully, you have to love and take care of yourself before you can commit to submitting to another.
With all that said, I devote my time to making sure that they are constantly growing and not regressing... It is something that means more to me then when they drop to their knees to serve... I tend to make sure that whether I verbally say it or not, my sub knows that at all times they are being loved. (love is a strong word for me, and there aren't many people that get to hear the word love from me... ever.)
For me it does not matter even if I have known that person for a day or for years... if I take on a sub, and am interested in finding out more about the sub that I am taking on, then I am devoting my time and dedication to making sure that my sub is safe, and that we build a solid trust and communication amoungst each other. In turn, I would hope that one day my sub will have the same feelings as I have about them. I would want them to love me or at least have some genuine feeling of like or continuous feeling of excitement when they are near me. I hate to see subs who stop liking or even resenting their Owner because of miscommunication or because their Dominant does not even act as though they care for their subs...
My question is, (and forgive me for rambling) When you take on a sub/slave in your personal life, is it necessary for you to love your submissive in some form or fashion for a successful relationship? Or in some cases is it easier to not love your sub, so that you can obtain power over them? I am just really interested in what everyones opinion is on this topic.
Some I have loved, some I have not.
I don't believe it's necessary or even wise to love your property; authority works better when there's a distance - usually. When you're too close to those you control, command, etc., matters of the heart can affect your judgment. But, I suppose it's that way with a lot of things in life...
However, with the right attitude and a clear head, loving your property can work too. So long as you don't confuse love with need, at least from her point of view.
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... it's odd, part of U/us thinks ... is it only 4 years? W/we seem to know each other so well, and have been through so much ... it must be longer! But then, W/we also think ... there is so much more to know, W/we've only just begun ... (oh dear, i did my usual and broke into song on that last line LOL!). 
It's wonderful to hear about another D/s relationship that continues to flourish! I bet you can't wait for the day your anniversary hits double-digits so your spanking takes a while
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