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RE: Please, kindly reply even if... - 8/21/2005 10:39:49 PM

subfever

Posts: 2895
Joined: 5/22/2004
Status: offline

quote:

And you are right subfever, Mistresses may not like this, but i'll have to side with the sub that posted this discussion, because if i write 15 minute thoughtfull message, and get no reply, i consider it rude not to get a reply on the most sincere message i have sent. One liners don't deserve replies, but i am not a one liner.

As I've mentioned earlier in this thread, I also consider it rude to ignore non-insulting, effort-laden approaches.

Your harrassment technique may have worked for you in one instance. However, IMHO, this technique will only serve to aggravate most Ladies who are already sensitive about how malesubs conduct themselves when approaching them, and/or the sheer volume of mail they're already receiving.

Consider the fact that many malesubs are desperate for any approach techniques that work better than their current techniques. While I have no doubt that your intentions for sharing your success story were good, you may have inadvertently encouraged some malesubs to try your technique themselves. I can't help but think that this would only make an already bad situation, for both Dommes and malesubs alike, even worse.

Sorry if my earlier stalking description was over-the-top. No offense was intended.

subfever

(in reply to virginsoul)

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Post #: 61

RE: Please, kindly reply even if... - 8/22/2005 9:00:46 PM

TiNeedsHouseboy

Posts: 145
Joined: 4/24/2005
From: Big Apple blossom blown to The Windy City
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: subfever
But I'm curious. Assuming that an approach is polite and expressive, is it better to ignore it so the malesub continues to send the same type of approach to countless other Dommes? Or is it better to briefly point out the errors of his ways so he learns to modify his thought-process... and hopefully, his future approaches?

To all "new" Dommes who have been posting requests for guidance throughout the Ask a Mistress board:

This is a classic example of manipulative inquiries that will likely come your way.

Here's the way it usually plays out: You receive an e-mail, which is supposed to pass for an introduction. For whatever reason, you deem it is either inappropriate to answer, or you send a note saying that you're not interested. The guy writes back with a request that you should explain what it was that prompted you to reject his fabulous note. He's merely an attention-seeking manipulator in subbie guise. Don't fall for the ruse.

It's analogous to the vanilla boyfriend, who you decide is not your cup of tea, and you terminate the relationship. He continues to make bids for your attention -- that you should explain the whys, hows and wherefores of everything he did to lead you to reject him.... wrapped up in the alleged guise of his inability to engage in personal growth without your feedback. Perhaps he'll even pull that old saw out of his bag of tricks that he could change -- if only you'd let him know what needs to get changed.

Ladies, it's not your obligation to fall for such ploys. That's today's opinion from Ti-Land. Hope you'll find it handy. It's just a matter of time 'til such a dynamic strikes your e-mail box.

~ Ti ~

(in reply to subfever)

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Post #: 62

RE: Please, kindly reply even if... - 8/23/2005 7:21:13 AM

subfever

Posts: 2895
Joined: 5/22/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: TiNeedsHouseboy

quote:

ORIGINAL: subfever
But I'm curious. Assuming that an approach is polite and expressive, is it better to ignore it so the malesub continues to send the same type of approach to countless other Dommes? Or is it better to briefly point out the errors of his ways so he learns to modify his thought-process... and hopefully, his future approaches?

To all "new" Dommes who have been posting requests for guidance throughout the Ask a Mistress board:

This is a classic example of manipulative inquiries that will likely come your way.

Here's the way it usually plays out: You receive an e-mail, which is supposed to pass for an introduction. For whatever reason, you deem it is either inappropriate to answer, or you send a note saying that you're not interested. The guy writes back with a request that you should explain what it was that prompted you to reject his fabulous note. He's merely an attention-seeking manipulator in subbie guise. Don't fall for the ruse.

It's analogous to the vanilla boyfriend, who you decide is not your cup of tea, and you terminate the relationship. He continues to make bids for your attention -- that you should explain the whys, hows and wherefores of everything he did to lead you to reject him.... wrapped up in the alleged guise of his inability to engage in personal growth without your feedback. Perhaps he'll even pull that old saw out of his bag of tricks that he could change -- if only you'd let him know what needs to get changed.

Ladies, it's not your obligation to fall for such ploys. That's today's opinion from Ti-Land. Hope you'll find it handy. It's just a matter of time 'til such a dynamic strikes your e-mail box.

~ Ti ~

LOL... What boatload of psychobabble claptrap! But to you credit, at least you correctly identified your response as opinion.

In my opinion, this is simply another example of you:

A) jumping to a false conclusion... which is something you seem to do on a fairly regular basis.

B) allowing your emotions to guide you.

I think most people will rationally interpret my original comment as a simple food-for-thought offering; given in hopes of possibly narrowing the gap of the obviously widespread problem between Dommes and the malesubs who approach them.

It wouldn't surprise me if some people will question what your real motivation is here, Ti.

Here's some more food-for-thought:

"Ti-Land"?:

A pretty strong hint of narcissism here, wouldn't you say?

"classic example of manipulative inquiries"?:

Whew! ... Talk about paranoid!

(in reply to TiNeedsHouseboy)

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Post #: 63

RE: Please, kindly reply even if... - 8/23/2005 6:06:28 PM

SimplyWickedGRL

Posts: 6
Joined: 6/19/2005
Status: offline

LIsten hun, this is going to sound vain... but I get soooo many emails. I am one more than one sight... and its hard to reply to everyone.

I try the best I can, but they they reply. And I have to reply to those as well... and then I have new ones... on average I get about 40 a day... damn that sounds vain.

But that is the truth... I am sorry to eveyone I dont respond to. And on behalf of all the Dommes who havent responded to you... I am sorry as well.

(in reply to torsub4u)

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Post #: 64