RE: Is sex a must?

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RE: Is sex a must? - 11/29/2007 6:22:04 AM

toservez

Posts: 1733
Joined: 9/7/2006
From: All over now in Minnesota
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quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist

quote:

ORIGINAL: addisonclarkgirl

Lately, I haven't felt a huge desire for sex. I don't know if it's because I'm getting older, a hormone change, a self esteem issue, I'm not with the right person...whatever. How does a submissive deal with this? Can one be in a BDSM relationship without the sexual component? When I am in the mood, I'm back to my kinky, sub, little girl self, but if I'm supposed to be serving someone, is it fair of me to "not be in the mood?"

YOu are human. Contrary to belief; we are not sex starved animals who must go at it 24/7/365

If you are not in the mood...you are not in the mood...not much that can be done to change that...what's more, yes, it's fair for YOU to not be in the mood all the time...the question is, can you live and accept HIS actions when you are not in the mood?

I agree with this. Obviously you do not have to be in the mood but it depends to what you have agreed to in your relationship if that is something your partner has to respect.

Whether we like to admit it or not our sexual being and perception of ourselves as sexual creatures plays a large role in our lives for most people including people in this life. A change in that area whether perception or drive I think it would be quite common to also affect how you feel in the submissive aspects of your life. I would imagine if this change is a long term thing a period of adjustment will happen that would not be easy.

If the drop off was rather sudden I would urge you to see a doctor. If this has happen before and just not for such a long as period maybe it is just a phase or something mentally/environmental is affecting your drive.

_____________________________

I am sorry I do not fit Webster's defintion of a slave but thankfully my Master is not Webster.

"Anything that contradicts experience and logic should be abandoned." - H.H. The 14th Dalai Lama

(in reply to IrishMist)

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RE: Is sex a must? - 11/29/2007 12:24:12 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
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quote:

ORIGINAL: danae

DesFIP:
if you have to wait 6 mos for HRT; you are seeing the wrong Dr.. look for info on Dr John C Arpels, a menopause and HRT specialist.

danae [Zeus]

That's contrary to every other doctor I've discussed this with. Before full menopause, your hormone levels vary enormously. So unless they're taking blood several times a day for a month straight, they have no way of knowing appropriate dosages.

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RE: Is sex a must? - 11/29/2007 12:38:14 PM

subtee

Posts: 5133
Joined: 7/26/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: wisteriaV

Maybe you in a lull of sorts. When you hit 40 though hang on it gets amazing. After I hit 40 my sex drive doubled and even as I approach 45 its still going strong. As others have stated BDSM does not have to mean sex.

[Emphasis added] Ditto that for me too. Yep.

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Post #: 23