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RE: Showing Him I'm worth it(his sub) - 12/6/2007 8:50:03 AM

OldBastardly1

Posts: 651
Joined: 7/22/2006
From: Atlanta, GA
Status: offline

I didn't see it as submitting to him. she made first contact, told him she was interested in him. He replied, asked about her and asked for a pic. she decided to not comply with his request for a pic. I would take that as a good indication that she just *might* be a PITA sub....in my opinion, of course.

_____________________________

Old Bastard

"You cannot make footprints in the sands of time if you're sitting on your butt. And who wants to make buttprints in the sands of time?" -- Bob Moawad

(in reply to breatheasone)

Post #: 21

RE: Showing Him I'm worth it(his sub) - 12/6/2007 9:05:11 AM

HalloweenWhite

Posts: 1028
Joined: 6/20/2005
Status: offline

To a degree I would've said "that's life", you win some you lose some, but I also agree with others who said that you didn't -really- show you were willing to follow an instruction he gave-he wanted a pic, but instead you gave a condition which had to be met before he go the pic.

If I asked for something from someone (and it was reasonable and possible for that person to do it) then I might be a bit miffed if it was met with conditions.

(in reply to stacee)

Post #: 22

RE: Showing Him I'm worth it(his sub) - 12/6/2007 9:38:48 AM

masterlink65

Posts: 683
Joined: 11/3/2007
Status: offline

is sending a photo really a sign of submission? or is the sub trying to "win" over this dom going to happen by not complying with said doms simple request.? i would like to believe that a sub writing to me is a sub and not a person who is going to start a relationship by playing games, i will send photo if you send email. whats next? i will submit if you go get me a coffee? to me a sub, basically should submit, telling a dom you will get something ,once you do this thing for me, doesnt seem too submissive to me. not saying she should submit after one email, but i sure dont see what she did as a sign that she is going to submit later. seems simple enough to ask for another email, but i see it as being aggressive and not being submissive. he didnt ask her to move in and wear a collar, he asked for a picture.

(in reply to breatheasone)

Post #: 23

RE: Showing Him I'm worth it(his sub) - 12/6/2007 9:46:20 AM

breatheasone

Posts: 4004
Joined: 7/14/2007
Status: offline

If he can't relate to me as a woman 1st....then no...he will never get my submission. If thats wrong thinking then fine I'm wrong...but I found a man that did JUST THAT and guess what?....I'm HIS for life.

_____________________________

Romans 10:13,For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.
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(in reply to masterlink65)

Post #: 24

RE: Showing Him I'm worth it(his sub) - 12/6/2007 9:50:53 AM

masterlink65

Posts: 683
Joined: 11/3/2007
Status: offline

i agree with you on accepting you as who you are first,,, but a photo is not too much to ask for in my opinion.

(in reply to breatheasone)

Post #: 25

RE: Showing Him I'm worth it(his sub) - 12/6/2007 10:35:12 AM

KatyLied

Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline

Not sending her picture may also be a good indication that she does want to give it out to a "collector". There's nothing in the D/s rule book that states you must send your picture in the second email. Sheesh.

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to OldBastardly1)

Post #: 26

RE: Showing Him I'm worth it(his sub) - 12/6/2007 10:49:55 AM

sweetNsmartBBW

Posts: 167
Joined: 5/16/2007
Status: offline

Well said KatyLied! Just because a Dom requests a pic, does not mean He's getting one until I'm comfortable sending it- whether I like Him and want to persue a relationship or not. Not everybody has a career or a personal life that makes them feel comfortable sending pictures until trust is established. No doubt the Dominant is curious, but writing off a submissive because she erred on the side of caution and patience?

Is it really putting a condition on sending the picture for her to at least want to know this Guy is ~interested~ in her before she sends it? Sounds more like common sense to me.

_____________________________

There are two kinds of strengths: the strength to lead, and the strength to follow; the strength to control, and the strength to yield. There are two kinds of power: the power to strip away another's soul bare, and the power to stand naked. Yaldah Tova

(in reply to KatyLied)

Post #: 27

RE: Showing Him I'm worth it(his sub) - 12/6/2007 11:05:48 AM

masterlink65

Posts: 683
Joined: 11/3/2007
Status: offline

doesnt mean hes gonna email her back either.

i didnt know photos of ones self are that hard to come by these days.

if i give out my phone number and someone calls me from a restricted or unavailable number, i will not answer. to me that person has something to hide. i do not need that.same with lack of photo.

for me it is hard to start a relationship on anonominity

(in reply to sweetNsmartBBW)

Post #: 28

RE: Showing Him I'm worth it(his sub) - 12/6/2007 11:35:03 AM

OldBastardly1

Posts: 651
Joined: 7/22/2006
From: Atlanta, GA
Status: offline

Again, I agree with the bulk of what mlink is saying. she is trying to "win" him over. she contacted Him expressing interest. It would be a little different for me if she had given an explaination citing privacy/discretion issues , or whatever, wouldn't set well with me.

I am not saying she was wrong, just saying that it wouldn't float with me.

_____________________________

Old Bastard

"You cannot make footprints in the sands of time if you're sitting on your butt. And who wants to make buttprints in the sands of time?" -- Bob Moawad

(in reply to masterlink65)

Post #: 29

RE: Showing Him I'm worth it(his sub) - 12/6/2007 1:13:38 PM

domiguy

Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

Not sending her picture may also be a good indication that she does want to give it out to a "collector". There's nothing in the D/s rule book that states you must send your picture in the second email. Sheesh.

This is why you will continue to be known as the "Spinster of CM."

Look, Girlie girl....Send some tit and gash shots immediately...If you don't get the response you seek send some pics of you "doing" your hottest girlfriend....If you need some more advice PM me....However, if there are no pics attached it will be deleted.

I don't play.

_____________________________

(in reply to KatyLied)

Post #: 30

RE: Showing Him I'm worth it(his sub) - 12/6/2007 1:33:30 PM

KatyLied

Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline

Yay! The domi is back.

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to OldBastardly1)

Post #: 31

RE: Showing Him I'm worth it(his sub) - 12/6/2007 3:58:56 PM

MissAnthropic

Posts: 40
Joined: 7/31/2007
Status: offline

An infatuation based upon viewing a profile is a far cry from love :D You simply do not know this man at all, he may well be rude and indifferent and callous. He is probably like everyone else, very normal, and leads an incredibly dull life. You attraction to this person is based on so little, it's almost a schoolgirl crush.

Personally I would walk away. Find someone real.

cheers

jess

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 32

RE: Showing Him I'm worth it(his sub) - 12/6/2007 4:21:20 PM

laurell3

Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy

quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

Not sending her picture may also be a good indication that she does want to give it out to a "collector". There's nothing in the D/s rule book that states you must send your picture in the second email. Sheesh.

This is why you will continue to be known as the "Spinster of CM."

Look, Girlie girl....Send some tit and gash shots immediately...If you don't get the response you seek send some pics of you "doing" your hottest girlfriend....If you need some more advice PM me....However, if there are no pics attached it will be deleted.

I don't play.

LOL Domi welcome back again.

I don't send pics right away. If someone doesn't have the courtesy to hear me out on the reasons why I don't and consider my reasoning then I'm fairly certain they aren't someone I have much interest in. In my opinion, there are no roles in the beginning of a relationship, it should be open communication. Wanting to protect your anonymity and ensure your safety is not game playing.

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to domiguy)

Post #: 33

RE: Showing Him I'm worth it(his sub) - 12/6/2007 4:26:51 PM

DarkDaddyZ

Posts: 805
Joined: 4/7/2006
Status: offline

Where ya been Domi Playa Playa? Now this thread is INDEED interesting!

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"Flirting is part of the job description." DJ Jesus (Lucy Daughter Of The Devil)

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(in reply to laurell3)

Post #: 34

RE: Showing Him I'm worth it(his sub) - 12/6/2007 7:28:02 PM

cinnia

Posts: 11
Status: offline

Ok, I'll bite.

stacee: Yes, send him a picture of yourself. If you don't have one, try and get at least one good clear shot of yourself to him as soon as possible.

If that is not good enough for him, try again. If it's still not good enough for him.....?

You both deserve to learn if a partner is "worthy".

Relationships take work, of course, and they also take patience.

( Besides, who knows - he may be a troll)

Good luck!

(in reply to stacee)

Post #: 35

RE: Showing Him I'm worth it(his sub) - 12/6/2007 7:31:18 PM

Grlwithboy

Posts: 655
Joined: 2/8/2005
Status: offline

Great, then he'll be a troll with your photo because he successfully pulled the "you're not really a submissive" card with someone who hasn't established any dynamic with him, yay.

(in reply to cinnia)

Post #: 36

RE: Showing Him I'm worth it(his sub) - 12/6/2007 7:34:18 PM

OldBastardly1

Posts: 651
Joined: 7/22/2006
From: Atlanta, GA
Status: offline

Worse things have happened, I am sure.

_____________________________

Old Bastard

"You cannot make footprints in the sands of time if you're sitting on your butt. And who wants to make buttprints in the sands of time?" -- Bob Moawad

(in reply to Grlwithboy)

Post #: 37

RE: Showing Him I'm worth it(his sub) - 12/6/2007 7:44:47 PM

MrSpectacular

Posts: 1153
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline

My suggestion is to not take it too seriously - get to know people and chat if they respond - if not move because they probably have.

_____________________________

Yes I am Spectacular and they are real!

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 38

RE: Showing Him I'm worth it(his sub) - 12/6/2007 8:29:17 PM

daddyncherry

Posts: 656
Joined: 10/9/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: masterlink65

doesnt mean hes gonna email her back either.

i didnt know photos of ones self are that hard to come by these days.

if i give out my phone number and someone calls me from a restricted or unavailable number, i will not answer. to me that person has something to hide. i do not need that.same with lack of photo.

for me it is hard to start a relationship on anonominity

Although i can completely see your point....(original point about her not doing it without giving him an instructions)

i am SOOOO glad that my Master/Daddy didn't think like that (above)with me.

He knew what i looked like, but pics can always be fake (he trusted me to be who i am)....i called him ALWAYS from blocked numbers...for months....and i also wouldn't tell him my last name or my phone number for months.

Why????? Because as a woman i am very cautious, sometimes overly so, but i'd rather be overly cautious than easy prey.....Also he was the first and only relationship i ever began online...so i was extra cautious for that reason....it was new territory...not only was i out in the dating world again but "OH MY" i was doing it online...with a virtual (pun intended) stranger.

There were other extenuating circumstances that made me even more cautious....

Thankfully he was patient with me and 3 years since our first meeting we are still together.

_____________________________

Hugs,
cherry

Walking through life, and fear with a smile on my face.
Walking directly through the eye of the hurricane...and through to the other side..without fear....realizing everything will be okay. :)

being obedient 1day at a time

(in reply to masterlink65)

Post #: 39

RE: Showing Him I'm worth it(his sub) - 12/6/2007 11:32:17 PM

MissOchistic

Posts: 315
Joined: 4/30/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: masterlink65

is sending a photo really a sign of submission? or is the sub trying to "win" over this dom going to happen by not complying with said doms simple request.? i would like to believe that a sub writing to me is a sub and not a person who is going to start a relationship by playing games, i will send photo if you send email. whats next? i will submit if you go get me a coffee? to me a sub, basically should submit, telling a dom you will get something ,once you do this thing for me, doesnt seem too submissive to me. not saying she should submit after one email, but i sure dont see what she did as a sign that she is going to submit later. seems simple enough to ask for another email, but i see it as being aggressive and not being submissive. he didnt ask her to move in and wear a collar, he asked for a picture.

While I agree with your general sentiment, and that it's likely her disobendience that lost her a reply, I disagree that she in any way should have obeyed or that it's a sign of how she'll be later. Not submitting when you're not my Dom doesn't prove I won't ever submit to you.
So I gotta say, that "when you reply" bit stuck right out at me, and I think it's likely his reason for not replying, and I also think he had every right to expect you to obey if he chooses to look for those kinds of subs, you also had every right to disobey as a person. I may have chosen to delay sending a photo as well, for my general comfort, and not had a lick of SAM in me. Take it as a sign that you and the real him are not compatible, he apparently already has.

_____________________________

"The amount i care for Thee
is more than two, but less than three."

"Submission is a potlatch."

(in reply to masterlink65)

Post #: 40

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